Anon joins the council | /r/Greentext
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![File: schwartsz.gif (998 KB, 500x263) O Anonymous 09/01/21(Wed)23:49:34 No.65221519 [Reply] > >be 3.1/10 guy >be in indoor parking garage >park >be walking away from car >see 9.6/10 girl trying to park >swipes a pillar and loses some light bodywork >pick up the car piece and approach her car >shes cringing as she gets out >wow, beautiful body >amazing face >large hips and breasts the size of bowling balls (half each) >about to hand her the car piece >tell her "hey you dropped this. like god dropped you from heaven" >shes cringing >pass her the piece of the car >whip out my card and tell her "here's my number in case you need to file a police report" >shes cringing >oh no quick make a joke >point at her and me "the police, for the car, not for me approaching you in a dark garage, the police doesnt need to know about this, i dont need more additions to my record" >shes cringing >oh >my >god >i f----- up i f----- up i f----- up >that joke was f------ creeeeeeeeeeeeeeepy >she takes her earphones out "OH MY GOD I CRASHED MY CAR, THANK YOU FOR BRINGING THIS" >"no problem, have a nice day" I was so relieved I almost peed my pants.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/189/431/cc7.png "Anon tries to flirt | /r/Greentext")
![O Anonymous 08/30/21(Mon)21:35:02 No.65190264 [Reply] >>65191036 >no GF >no friends >no social life >don't want any either >no depressions or regrets >genuinely happy all the time >tons of active hobbies and even more that i want to get into damn it feels good not to be restrained by the normie societal standards 7 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/189/384/c54.jpg "Anon is antisocial | /r/Greentext")
![File: wp4289383.jpg (96 KB, 723x1280) Anonymous 08/31/21(Tue)16:43:15 No.65209188 [Reply] >>65209353 High school memories thread >be 13-14 a few days before highschool >be an absolute spastic >terrified of going to a new school >have big bro, 2 years older, who goes to the same school >ask him for help to fit in >he tells me to beat up a kid on the first day for some small reason >fat chance I have no muscles, but will try anyway >the day comes >nothing eventful from opening assembly >the shuffle us off to our home rooms >people already bonding around me and laughing >the dread kicks in >need to find someone to beat up >look around the group and see another squat weak looking kid >target acquired >wait until we're seated in home room >single desk seats like in the animes >make sure to sit directly behind him >still haven't got a good look at his face >wait until the teacher has done their talking and people are getting up to go to their first class >he gets up out of his >l jump to my feet and punch him in the back of the head >he flops to the ground holding his hands over his head >try and shout "thats for staring at me during assembly!" >pre-teen voice cracks halfway through so it sounds weak as f--- >stunned silence follows >after a second, kid lets out a guttural screech and rolls over >oh god, oh f--- >he has autism face >he's f------ retarded and l've just punched him for no reason >get sent to the principal's office >shunned by the rest of the school after the word got out >didn't make any friend >still don't have any now >bro laughs about it to this day](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/189/337/083.png "Anon tries to assert his dominance on the first day of school | /r/Greentext")
