Anon tries CS:GO | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

http://boards.4chan.org/v/thread/325995426/make-an- C A R : Anonymous 01/31/16(Sun)23:19:52 No.325997892 >>326017631 File: 1453421252682.jpg (25 KB, 500x363) >buy CS:GO on winter sale to see why its so popular >join some random match >aim is right on the torso of the enemy >bullet somehow hits the upper left of the screen >guy turns around and kills me while jumping >uninstall the game and ask for a refund Anenymous 01/21/16(Sun)22.22:12 No 225009116 235000100 23500 0030

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon plays the flute | /r/Greentext

>Sit next to a fat kid in my class >he's constantly falling asleep >start bringing a flute with me to class >when he falls asleep take the flute out >blow it really hard next to his ear >scares the s--- out of him >tell him its a pokeflute and I was using it to wake the Snorlax >other people start calling him Snorlax >blast that flute into his ear every day for nearly a year >walking to school one day there's a crowd gathered at the entrance >the fat kid is up on the roof wearing a Snorlax costume >tears streaming down his face, he spots me in the crowd >"Good luck waking up the Snorlax now, you bastard!" he yelled just before he dove off of the roof >his body slams hard into the pavement below >everybody starts running around and screaming for help >I rush over to his mangled body >I can hear him breathing wet shallow breaths >he's still alive, but just barely >l pull the flute from my bag >put it right next to his ear >blow the loudest most shrill note I could possibly muster >his head snaps up and he stares at me >I can see the burning hatred in his bloodied eyes as he stares at me >call him a Snorlax >his head drops back down to the pavement >he died on the way to the hospital

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Anon needs to take his meds | /r/Greentext

File: template-epic-handshake-3(..).jpg (58 KB, 900x506) O RACIAL FITNESS Anonymous 05/14/21(Fri)19:06:16 No.61500637 ► >ASIANS Strength: 1 Speed: 4 Intelligence: 5 Charm: 2 >WHITES Strength: 4 Speed: 2.5 Intelligence: 4 Charm: 2 >BLACKS Strength: 4 Speed: 4.5 Intelligence: 1.5 Charm: 4 >INDIANS Strength: 2 Speed: 2 Intelligence: 4 Charm: 5 >ABOS Strength: 2 Speed: 2 Intelligence: 1 Charm: 3 Sight: 6 Agree or disagree bros? O Anonymous 05/14/21(Fri)19:07:24 No.61500652 >>61500637 (OP) You're f------ retarded OP

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Anon is stupid | /r/Greentext

>just figured out island is pronounced "eye-lind" and not "is- land" why the f--- has nobody corrected me for this in the past 23 f------ years? h-------- I feel like a genuine retarded chimpanzee 27 KB PNG

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Anon thinks he‘s special for thinking | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I can't be the only one. 05/16/21(Sun)07:23:21 No.63691618 >be me >have constant narrator in my head >always talking, always thinking in words >basically need words to process sensory input from the world >typically think as if I'm having a 42 KB JPG conversation with someone >always thinking about past or future, or some topic or issue >saw youtube video recently that said this can be unhealthy >said it is kind of a coping mechanism >realized most people don't think like I do and instead tune into the world around them >have been trying to change, trying to silence the internal narrator >try to be in moment instead >anyone else know this feel?

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Anon has a laptop | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/15/21(Sat)23:59:36 No.150985924 My friend had a sticker of G---- from Cars on his laptop. He got into cocaine for a few years, and him and his coke buddies would make 28 KB JPG their lines on the G---- sticker, and said "pit stop" after every hit. >>150986141 # >>150986735 # >>150986983 # >>150987709 #

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Anon wonders why liveleak got shut down | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/15/21(Sat)17:53:09 No.854514283 With Liveleak and Best Gore gone now what are the next best Live Leak alternatives /b/ros? Looking for some uncensored videos of current conflict in Gaza/Palestine/lsrael as well. 19 KB JPG : Anonymous 05/15/21(Sat)17:53:46 No.854514324 >>854514283 (OP) # isn't it weird how those got shut down right before israel started a new war

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Anon is having acute renal failure. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/07/21(Sun)17:39:09 No.8490226 Day 6 of urine retention 228 KB JPG

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anon explains the purpose of his gains. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous what is your "end goal", anon?(...) 07/23/20(Thu) 16:32:28 No.56584035 what is the main goal with your /fit/ lifestyle? Is it to stay healthy the rest of your life? To get in shape to find a decent partner? Or are you just fighting off the feeling of depression? 158 KB JPG : Anonymous 07/23/20(Thu) 16:35:13 No.56584062 >>56584035 (OP) # The complete destruction of the state of Israel. >>56584110 # >>56584111 # >>56584120 # >>56584126 # >>56584152 # >>56584169 # >>56584173 # >>56584180 # >>56584366 # >>56584435 # >>56584537 # >>56584569 # >>56584955 # >>56585050 # >>56585190 # >>56585220 # >>56585229 # >>56585303 # >>56585315 # >>56585626 # >>56585751 # >>56585830 # >>56585958 # >>56585978 # >>56585997 # >>56586080 # >>56586146 # >>56586355 # >>56586417 # >>56586477 # >>56586602 # >>56586738 # >>56587656 # >>56587689 # >>56587850 # >>56588158 # >>56588198 # >>56588943 # >>56589062 # >>56589128 # >>56589506 # >>56589533 #

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Anon stands up for the little guy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Womanlet Revenge 10/17/17(Tue)20:20:28 No.40480576 >See constant threads about girls s------- on manlets on /r9k/ >Be 6ft 2in white guy >Be borderline sociopathic, barely have any empathy >Use Tinder and match with only 53 KB PNG really short girls >Exclusively seek out shorter girls (5ft 4in or below) >Talk to them and casually bring about short guys >if any of them talk s--- about manlets or say they're gross, I start pursuing them harder >Ask them out with the promise of sex >Take a small bottle of mustard water and hide it in my jacket >Go to the roastie w----- place >Make out or whatever and then right before we're about to f--- ask to be excused and go to the bathroom >down the mustard water >go back to see her >hold back the vomit >When their clothes come off I immediately start vomiting all over and spray it as much as I can >roastie is horrified >I tell them I find their shortness disgusting and I feel l'd be f------ a child >I leave telling them they shouldnt date tall guys and to stick to manlets I've successfully done this 10 times in the last 6 months. They always end up crying or freaking out and I j------- to that thought when I get home. I'm doing this for you my manlet brothers, its not your fault you didn't have the genetic lottery. F--- those roastie w-----. 73 Replies / 21 Images View Thread

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Canon loves his mom. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/12/20(Sat)16:24:43 No.60012186 >Try to start a Youtube >Post every day >30 days in >Embarrassed about my videos >only viewer is mom >she comments positive things on 10 KB JPG every video Thanks Mom

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Anon is a hacker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/16/21(Sun)00:37:59 No.854528611 >be measly russian hacker >breach weak security of United States gasoline pipeline >demand $5million in bitcoins >angry old man screams to me "you lying pony dog" >continues to babble nonsense 101 KB JPG about Cornpops cereal and amtrak trains >i hang up on the old fool. perhaps him ill. >pipeline company calls back and apologize >sending bitcoin right over

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Anon goes bald | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/15/21(Sat)19:25:47 No.63683187 >tfw oldfag >start to see my hair thining last <- month >say f--- it and shave it all breaking bad style >end up feeling alot better after a while 258 KB JPG >people from my gaming store I go to all the time say I look like a army drone or a monk now >in the store yesterday and got asked out by a girl out of nowhere This never happened with hair, you guys where dead wrong, this is the best s--- to ever happen to me. May be leaving robotdom now, Post more blackpills so I know what not to do lol.

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