Meanwhile... | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous O 132 KB PNG Anonymous Ex 12/12/19(Thu)13:40:37 No.115286066 >>115286076 # >>115286090 # >>115286530 # 64 KB JPG >>115286013 # 12/12/19(Thu)13:41:11 No.115286076 >>115286066 # >>115286090 # >>115286105 # >>115286530 #

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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So this is why Silent Hills was cancelled | /r/Greentext

Welcome to Silent Hill 1535937820714.jpg 114 KB JPG >T, you seein what I'm seein? >Yeah, f------ triangle f------ a pair o' legs. >Nah, that ain't a triangle. It's a trapezoid. >What the f--- did you call me? >Tony, no disrespect intended. But it ain't two dimensional, it got length width and depth. So, it's a trapezoid. >Are you f------ serious? This guy. >Whoa whoa whoa, that's some piece he got on him. That's bigger than Blundetto's cabasa, you know what I'm sayin'

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Online screening | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12 KB JPG 10/10/21(Sun)05:46:19 No.864738646 >be me >meet cutie soft dom goth girl on dating app >hit it off pretty well >get to know each other online >we are really into one another so we plan on going on a date sometime >one night she asks to chat a bit before she goes to bed >I didn't voice chat with her that day, so why not! >get in call ready to chill with her for a bit >find out she is horny and wanted hear me while she did her thing >kindahot.mkv >get into with her, moaning along and such >end up getting horny as well so I start jacking off too >full on sex erp >we both get real close and I hear >"c-- for me anon, you cute baby boy" >bust a nut so hard I almost when f------ blind >get called cute and tells me how she really liked that >"Hey anon, wanna see something..." >ohfuck.webm >Think she is going to send a nude or something >She screen shares a whole ass power point presentation titled: "Hello future potential boyfriend" that she made earlier that day >mfw We are all going to make it bros!

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Anon works at supermarket | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 130 KB JPG 05/15/23(Mon)13:37:51 No.73325249 >be me, 21-year-old anon >working at local supermarket >shift starts at 8am >wake up at 7:55am >panic mode engaged >throw on clothes, don't even brush teeth >race to work, praying I won't be late >somehow arrive at 8:01am >boss gives me disapproving look >"Anon, you're late again" >mumble apologies, heart racing >spend the rest of the day paranoid >boss keeps giving me side-eye >coworkers whispering and giggling >decide to redeem myself >next day, set alarm for 6am >wake up feeling victorious >get ready with time to spare >arrive at work at 7:55am >smug grin on my face >boss looks shocked "Anon, you're early..." >MFW I can't win with this guy

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Anon is planning a heist on Abby Shepiro | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous < classicallyabby Virginia 3. 5/4/22 Breastmilk TO FR FREEZE 400 Lansingh. Breastmilk 3.5 CLASSICALLYABBY Posts 5/6/22 08/02/23(Wed)16:09:08 No.188300115 150 120 Q RIK A vousved Breastmilk P PETOLP 1/26/22 noh. reastr stmilk 2013/5 Lansinoh. Breastmilk TO PUMP INTO BA NETUR zz/ATS Lansnoh. Breastmilk ADAPTER to LINE HOW TO FREEZE 400 Lansinoh tmilk 180 MA 6 s9uhcykp57791.jpg 259 KB JPG 3.9. V Liked by dark_iron_gains and 6,796 others classicallyabby Feeling beyond grateful today 49 Follow 9091 իրաշSEP yous Today I'm making my first breastmilk donation to families in need. It's such a huge blessing that I was able to produce enough for my son and for others, too. I am so happy that I can help those babies who need it! ... K >>188300229 # >>188300249 # >>188300895 # >>188301036 # I'm putting together a team. One last score and we're out of the game. Who's in?

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Anon tricks the system. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous feels good 08/22/18(Wed)09:08:49 No.777883934 man 30 KB JPG >be me >am 17 >am pretty stupid and broke so decide to sell fake drugs >start filling a few bags with oregano and selling to freshmen >kids actually believe it's weed and buy some >mfw they fake being high and then come back to buy more >one day called up to principals office >there's a cop in there >they ask to search my bag >mfw all they find is oregano >mfw I say I'm making pasta after school and my friend gave me some oregano he grew to use >mfw they can't do anything so they send me back to class

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Anon fanning (i.redd.it) . | /r/Greentext

>>46575716 # >be me >neighbour has heavily disabled son >I'm talking Steven hawkings 2.98 MB PNG levels of qaudraspazzed >outside gym master race >one day I'm lifting and he's in the neighbors garden >I'm benching my 1RM >here a noise >look up and see this little spazoid cheering and bobbing his head >now every time I lift he wheels himself out and cheers me on >mfw I now lift for him >>46575873 # >>46575916 # >>46575954 # >>46575963 # >>46576013 # >>46576043 # >>46576233 # >>46578453 # >>46578580 # >>46578865 # >>46582317 # >>46582488 # >>46582583 # >>46582599 #

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Biz anon gets horny during a meeting | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 6t1Kp7EU) 08/03/23(Thu)11:38:09 No.55742075 >>55739733 (OP) # I f----- up so bad during the pandemic and got humiliated and fired for something like this. I've posted it before >be me, may 2020 >everyone was sent to WFH full time >Business is very slow because of the early stages of the pandemic where basically everyone was just sitting in their homes >manager decides that for morale boosting we have a team meeting every morning >no actual business goals just people bullshitting about TV shows, pandemic, cooking, stuff like that >extreme hottie that's on my team is talking about some movie and won't shut up. Just staring at her watching her mouth move, laugh, play with her hair. She's wearing a little tank top >get incredibly horny, pull my pants down and start jacking off, discreetly. >Everyone continues bullshitting. I unmute and say a dumb little joke, everyone laughs. Mute again >Still horny and slowly stroking. Get so coombrained that I go to x------ on my phone >Pull up a c------ compilation video >take off headphones and start watching video while continuing to j-------, around 30 seconds or so of guys groaning and moaning as they shoot louds into girls mouths >all of a sudden hear faint voices louder and louder >Pause p--- and put headphones back on >realize my headset was unmuted the entire time I just stuttered uncontrollably and left the call. Got let go within two hours. The pandemic unemployment was awesome but I destroyed my reputation >>55742092 # >>55742745 # >>55742767 # >>55743297 # >>55743784 #

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You played yourself | /r/Greentext

⠀ This is the moment I uninstalled bg3 This is the moment I uninstall(...) Anonymous 10/19/20(Mon)16:22:02 No.832064 139CD1D0-8B32-4858-AA7B-FC20C2B53C70.jpg 84 KB JPG I cant believe this game forces you to be gay. 10/19/20(Mon)16:52:42 No.832202 That's literally the dream lover you made and completely customized. Are you sure you didn't want to be gay? EARLY ACCESS v4.1.84.2021 : Anonymous >>832389 # >>834009 # >>834917 # >>843762 # >>851486 # >>853415 # 10/19/20 (Mon)17:23:13 No.832389 >>832202 # It said >who do you dream of at night Just because your dreams have men in them doesn't mean you're gay or want to f--- them >>832401 # >>832402 # >>832410 # >>832467 # >>833461 # >>833641 # >>833806 # >>834072 # >>834263 # >>834361 # >>834917 # >>835186 # >>835695 # >>836142 # >>836183 # >>836201 # >>836445 # >>836509 # >>836843 # >>836867 # >>837206 # >>837910 # >>840554 # >>840675 # >>840680 # >>840792 # >>841115 # >>841136 # >>841451 # >>843762 # >>844048 # >>844265 # >>846176 # >>846197 # >>849058 # >>849117 # >>849135 # >>849277 # >>849288 # >>849988 # >>850011 # >>851227 # >>851234 # >>851271 # >>851340 # >>851486 # >>851522 # >>851932 #

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Anon cant control himself | /r/Greentext

>be me, 14 >my sister is 16 >be at home one night, dad is out >sister is wearing bra and panties >boner.jpg >sitting on the couch watching tv >she says she's going to bed, goes to her room >dad gets home >dad and I f---

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She's the bomb | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02 02/15/21(Mon)12:11:21 No.62341896 fabc35dee775bcdac2ffa64de4c75e860560139768986e54fb0a433e5 90 KB JPG >Hey anon. I'm back. *kisses you* >God, you have such cute blue eyes.*strokes your hair* >My feet are so tired, have been killing palestinians all day. Will you give me a foot rub?

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Anon ask a good question | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/16/23(Sun)22:44:42 No.35317358 Untitled33_20220824192307.png 3.22 MB PNG How do we stop intergalactic energy spiders from coming to earth?

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Anon takes his jokes too far | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/02/23 (Wed)17:08:42 No.74251486 9 KB JPG >be me >the jokester of the gang >friends love dark humor so always joke about liking lolis and what would I do to them >eventually they became f------ and got uncomfortable so decide to change my jokes to racist jokes which they love >be one day, they insisted on coming to my house to play smash >be really excited >while playing one friend wants to go to the bathroom >notice he's taking his sweet time but every time I want to go look my friends talk to me about something >be today the group chat is dead and nobody is replying >be sad so decide to pleasure myself >look for my hard drive and notcie its not there >sudden realization, heart beating fast >this mfs stole my hard drive anons i really really really dont want to go to jail my f------ heart is bursting out of my chest right now i wanna puke h--------

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