There's nothing funny about this greentext. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 07/26/19(Fri)01:01:59 No.805554270 >be me >going to college next month >quitting job tomorrow >work at best buy >hey anon what would be a good laptop for autocad >I mumble "f--- off" just loud enough for 69 KB JPG her to hear >she goes to manager >I deny everything and he f------ believes me and has the girl taken out by the cops cause she started to make a scene >MFW quitting tomorrow

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Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon has post nut clarity | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2.17 MB GIF 04/26/23 (Wed)11:22:47 No.73098533 >>73098625 # >feel lonely >watch p--- >feel gross : Anonymous >>73098533 (OP) # Stupid frog f----- you will burn in hell for your wickedness. 04/26/23(Wed)11:28:18 No.73098569

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Anon wants to feel like God | /r/Greentext

>don't get female attention for a bit >Feel like a loser incel >Have sexual contact with girl >Feel like invincible God King How do I feel like an invincible God King all the time?

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Anon got chloroformed | /r/Greentext

: noko...also the game 09/29/17 (Fri) 15:44:11 No.19675045 Reality glitch thread Post times where time and space goofed. >Be me 83 KB JPG >Going to bed while staying at grandparents' rural farmhouse as a 10 year old kid. >Not tired at all - 100% lucid. >Decide eh I'll just try closing my eyes. >It's only 9:30 p.m. >The MOMENT I close my eyes it's instantly morning literally within a blink of an eye. >Brother was in the twin bed next to me and he disappeared instantaneously. >Can smell grandma making breakfast. >YouWutMate.jpeg >Never been able to reproduce what happened or have somebody tell me the same happened to them.

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Anon leaks his racial beliefs to the public | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 168 KB PNG 04/22/23(Sat)12:41:45 No.73052953 >be me, going to work >packed train but managed to secure a seat >somewhat long ride, so decide to play some vidya >fire up some good ol' pixel gun 3d >play survival for as many rounds as I can >the woman next to me keeps glancing at my phone, idk why >realize it's because of the pet mammoth I named "hairy n-----" >I close the game and put my phone back in my pocket for the remainder of the ride. Thank god my company doesn't have company shirts or else she would have probably called my boss, and I would have been f-----.

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I'm Anon, And This Is My Confessional Cringe For The Day. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 4/25/2023, 10:13:41 PM No.65351361 2442 KB JPEG > Today was a day many customers came to our counter. Didn't fail to remember every single one's name (they're mostly all regulars) > Woman co-worker notices > ~"How do you remember so many names Anon, what's your secret?" > Me, smiling sheepishly: > "Well, the first time I meet someone, I repeat their name back to them after they introduce themselves. Then when I get home I write their name down in a journal in my room." > Woman: "Haha, kinda weird, so how many people do you know? > Me, still smiling: > "I've written 937 names in my journal. :)" > "That's kinda creepy Anon" What'd I do wrong?

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Can’t win for losing | /r/Greentext

270 KB JPG >Planned to go to kinoplex to watch a few movies >Skipped the early train >Missed the bus >Missed the second bus >Missed the missed the first bus again >Next bus isn't until 4 hours later >Can't use Lyft because it'll double the cost of transportation for less time as I already missed half the day at this point. Sorry /n/bros...I've failed y'all...

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Anon lives in the future | /r/Greentext

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Anon chose the wrong major | /r/Greentext

File: C96A4C66-6EC3-4137-A643-C(...).jpg (198 KB, 750x727) you're on drugs mom me showing clear symptoms of being a capybara Want to kill myself because of college regret Anonymous 04/24/23(Mon)00:49:15 No.28816996 >>28817016 >>28817458 >>28817891 >>28819168 >>28819370 >>28820328 Majored in marketing and discovered every lunatic superficial retarded female bully I had from highschool also majored in marketing and now I literally want to kill myself bc I don't even like marketing. This field is anyways associated with moronic salespeople and people who literally upload memes on an instagram page for a living I legit want to die now i'm too broke to study something else

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Anon has Dementia Anon has Dementia Anon has Dementia | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 201 KB JPG 04/24/23 (Mon)23:57:06 No.898178214 1 Reply >this is a dementia toy >its given to dementia sufferers to keep them distracted with peaceful stimulation >this is a dementia toy >its given to dementia sufferers to keep them distracted with peaceful stimulation >this is a dementia toy >its given to dementia sufferers to keep them distracted with peaceful stimulation View Thread

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Anon doesn’t understand women | /r/Greentext

12 KB JPG >women get mad if you don't show an interest >women just string you along if you do

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I think Anon needs help | /r/Greentext

BOTTOMLESS PIT 113 KB JPG >be me 25 man >be in commuted relationship with beautiful 25 woman >be at doctors office >see 13-15 girl enter waiting room >instantly think she's hot as f---, huge ass nice t--- >uh oh why did I think that >remember I love my woman who is 25 >think about f------ girl in waiting room >know it's wrong and stop thinking about it >still looked at her ass and was attracted to her >am I a p---?

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Anon comes to terms with his blood line ending. | /r/Greentext

04/25/23(Tue)13:48:59 No.73090921 >h--- sapiens have existed for 200,000 years >h--- erectus (stop laughing) existed for 1.5 million years >australopithecus lived for at least 700,000 years >this goes back for 4 billion years >my bloodline has been an ever-evolving thing for 4 billion years >i cant get laid Anonymous 23 KB JPG lol 7 Replies View Thread 04/25/23(Tue)14:12:15 No.73091147 Anonymous >>73090921 (OP) # Don't feel bad. The bloodline continues. Just not with you.

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