nice penis bro haha | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

5h (2/10 13:37) 29546943 16 Re. 0 Img JPG 524KB (1353 x 1080) 1603403127109.jpg 5 Replies . >guy friend randomly sent me a pic of his c--- at 2AM >feel like I should be offended but friend in question is cute and his penis is nice and making me feel things >he hasn't sent me anything else so wondering if this was a mistake or not W-What do I send in response to this?! "nice penis bro haha"?! 5h (2/10 13:42) 29546969 1 Reply >>29546943 (OP) send him your d---

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon is tired | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 4 hours ago 1668481622624011.png (3.6 MB, 2100x3000) YOU 4 REPLIES TODAY 134 NEW DAY BE YOUR BEST SELF!!! 72167394 >used to cut >sister would check my body for new cuts to help me stop >years later I still wear shorts around here out of habit >her kid can talk now >asks about my scars >sister gets mad and tells her to stop asking >that's fine I don't know how to explain them to a toddler anyway >sister tells me if I say anything she'll check me like she used to >we laugh a little and she mentions one of her friends is taking care of her niece who started cutting >says she can't beat her up like she used to beat me up to stop her >asked me if I would talk to her How to help kids I don't know what I'm doing Anonymous 4 hours ago >>72167394 (OP) Probably don't have sex with the kid until it's 18 72167415 Anonymous 2 hours ago >>72167394 (OP) just remember how you felt at that time, try to empathize with why she might be cutting and give her ways to cope with the stress better. 72168212 Anonymous 2 hours ago >>72167394 (OP) Tell them you did it because you're a depressed loser that failed his life, and that its gonn happen if kid does the same thing as you 72168222 Anonymous 2 hours ago >>72167394 (OP) Just empathize and attempt to help as best you can. Make sure she knows you don't view her any differently. Good luck you got this 72168258

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Harry Potter Is About Guns | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: K/CukXlq 02/10/23(Fri)01:18:31 No.415591468 >>415589621 (OP) # All of Harry Potter is a beautiful gunpill from JK and she doesn't realize it >wands = guns, just replace wands with guns >guns can be used as a tool >guns can also kill >if you want to defend yourself you need a gun >everyone in Hogwarts brings their gun to school >get to go to special shop to pick out your own gun >globohomo ministry c--- comes to Hogwarts 35 KB JPG >guns are now illegal >how will we defend ourselves from Voldejew? >oy vey! Academically of course, you don't need dangerous guns! >Room of Acquirement or whatever reveals itself to students in times of t----- so they can practice their gun spells >guns end up rocking c---- ass Bongs are clueless so not surprising she red pilled her own audience on accident

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Anon's gf is retarded | /r/Greentext

File: sniff.jpg (36 KB, 657x527) my gf got scammed, wat do Anonymous 02/09/23(Thu)16:45:25 No.894082255 [Reply] ► >gf calls me >says a random dude showed up at our door while i was away saying that his car broke down and that he needed some cash really fast to have it towed >said he would pay her back in a few hours, left his phone number and called her on it just to be sure >gf gives him 30€ >get home >gf afraid that im mad at her >i tell her that an identical looking dude scammed another girl i know out of 100€ using the exact same story >the same guy has tried to scam me once too, but i told him to f--- off >gf says she wanted to help him out of the "goodness of humanity" and was hoping that the guy would return with the money >i call her gullible >gf gets very sad she just left for work, what do i do, bros, do i apologize to her? do i take out 30€ of my own money and leave it for her to find, so it looks like the guy really did return with the cash? i just dont want her to be sad

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Anons discuss aircraft | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/21/23(Sat)10:30:07 No.1883962 [Reply] Who the f--- thought the 'Bootyear' blimp was a good idea? + 2 replies omitted. Click here to view. >> Anonymous 01/26/23(Thu)20:54:13 No.1885397 >> Anonymous 02/08/23(Wed)15:14:27 No.1888933 >> Anonymous 02/09/23(Thu)17:44:11 No.1889226 File: 1674451894670853.png (2.33 MB, 1170x1314) Anonymous 02/09/23(Thu)20:05:25 No.1889251 >>1889252 I'm so gassy, anon... Uuuuhhhh.... Anons I want f--- da blimp....

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Anon likes to dream big | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >Be me >Win the lottery >Decide to build a calliope into my house >By the time construction is done, the insides of my house are filled with a labyrinth of brass pipes varying. My house is the calliope and the calliope is my house >2 months later, I get a date >We go out to some fancy Italian place >Take her to my house >"Hang on, I gotta do check something in my shed." restor CALLIOPE din mai mu EUROPEAN ZOOLOGICAL ASSOCIATION! 02/09/23(Thu)20:21:23 No.72165359 1.25 MB JPG >Spend 2 hours heating up the boilers needed to make steam for my calliope >Come back into the house >Walk over to the calliope is that draped in a massive cloth >Pull it off to reveal my custom built calliope, decided a bright red with a gold pinstripes >"What is that anon?" she asked >"Heh, you'll see" I say with a proud smirk >Proceed to absolutely shred whimsical carnival songs >This makes her super f------ turned on >I proceed to f--- her the entire night, while playing my calliope of course Blackpills are cringe robots, take the calliopepill

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Anon feels rebellious | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Should i start being a douche 02/09/23(Thu)19:01:20 No.89408758, Idk im just done with s---. And stupid people. Ive thought about getting a cool mask and s---, going out in the middle of the night and start vandalizing s---. Starting with mcdonalds. I nearly got fired from that place over a slushy before i quit. F--- up their dumpster or something idk. Im just TIRED of s---. I could become a supervillain or something. F--- you. Thats the message i have for the world. Dua Sun T Krull JSRE JURTRACKICIPUTURE 106 KB JPG

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The sorting hat does not believe in gender | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous MALE 01/10/23(Tue)11:38:14 No.623852796 1662696807908.png 1.64 MB PNG 23 Replies / 7 Images View Thread

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Would you care for some juice frens? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 39 minutes ago 8923623523.png (203.7 KB, 498x498) 72168584 >at resteraunt >group behind me >lady: "a man owns victorias secret??" >a man replies: "who do you think owns the majority of companies?" >don't say it don't say it don't say it

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Anon is stolen from | /r/Greentext

>Go in for prostate exam >Doctor walks in, prepares to administer the test >Notice something off in the way he moves, by the time I realize what's happening the door has been sealed >The doctors chest rips open, revealing the prostate goblins controlling his spinal cord >One jumps out and latches itself around my neck, can hear the others scurrying towards me as I blackout >Wake up with searing pain in ass >The bastard's stole my prostate 43 KB JPG

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Anon doesn't have a choice. | /r/Greentext

1h (2/9 20:39) 72161497 · 28 Re . 7 Img JPG 173KB (1280 × 720) · maxresdefault.jpg 3 Replies >anon, don't you think it's bad for your health that you never go outside or exercise? >yes mother, but I don't exactly have a choice in the matter. We moved from a 90% white city, to a city with more blacks than whites. That, and you can't get anywhere without a car. The closest business is an hours walk each way. >gaslighting ensues I really don't understand how parents can be so oblivious. It would take 5 minutes of consideration to completely understand my issues, but they refuse to do so. They just want to gaslight me and peddle falsehoods in order to abscond responsibility for the way I turned out. Because of this, it's hard to feel bad when I let the truth slip out and they melt down.

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Now we wait for Anon to get chopped up in the Congolese jungle | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Pros of Monke Cons of Monke 150 KB JPG 07/26/21 (Mon)07:45:28 No.859709433 >be me >Be depressed loser with no direction >Sadface >Randomly see return to monke meme >You know that's actually kinda funny >Start researching more about chimps and gorrilas Hey these guys are actually really cool >Want to learn more >Decide I'm going back to school for zoology >Apply for internship at zoo to work with gorrilas >While there meet a cute girl who works with tigers >Eventually planning on going to the congo for research Thank u monke very cool

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divided by war, united by coom | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: aqSLzNzh)I S 02/09/23(Thu)15:17:56 No.415469707 LITTLE PORNY Countries that search for MLP p--- more than the worldwide average. Belarus 462% Russia 427% Ukraine 326% P--- hub MLP INSIGHTS O Rule 34 >>415469150 (OP) # They are the same. Posts Comments Tags Wiki Documentation My Little Pony x Search photo_2023-01-13_23-38-50.jpg 155 KB JPG

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