: Anonymous 01/14/23(Sat)17:01:48 No.179208492 >An eery silence filled the atmosphere as Voldemort strided towards Harry. Adrenaline filled Harry's veins as he stepped closer, closer. Each step awoke a lair of dragons in his chest, filling its chambers with a fiery hate that Harry never knew even existed. Closer, Voldemort came, and the snakes in Harry's stomach kept writhing around viciously, each fighting for the opportunity to escape in the most painful way imaginable. 44 KB JPG >Then, Voldemort stopped. He stood at an arms length of Harry, and paused for what felt like an eternity. Voldemort's eyes met Harry's. "So much like your mother's eyes," Harry thought he'd say. Instead, he kept quiet. His stare burned more than any words ever could. Harry had to do something; he wouldn't cower away. Harry looked right back at him in defiance, and allowed his eyes to drink up Voldemort's features. There was no denying it. Even this thing he'd become after all these years could win over the heart of any fair maiden. >Harry suddenly became aware of his body. The dragons screamed hatred in his chest. The snakes planted their fangs deeper, and deeper into his stomach. He felt his blood coursing through his veins. Then he realised where it was headed. >In a heartbeat, Harry drew his wand. Voldemort never even flinched. "He doesn't fear me," Harry thought. Merely the cold, beautiful stare of the murderer, the soulless monster, that lived behind those menacing, mesmerising eyes could instil fear in even the bravest of hearts. >Harry's blood reached its destination, and he knew he wouldn't have much time left. The moment to act was now. >For a brief moment, Harry almost felt like embracing his fate. "No," Harry thought. He grasped his wand tightly in his hand, drawing from deep within him the tickling feeling that is magic, and uttered: "No h---."

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Context: what op was replying to was a thread about why men want the, “he asked for no pickles” meme to be a reality for them. | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 01/13/23(Fri) 10:46:17 No.624196373 File: 1529292521446.png (464 KB, 853x480) >>624196893 >>624197052 >>624201832 >>624205851 >>624190342 (OP) >back in high school >go on field trip >go to big food court after field trip >near the end of it, figure I'll just get a chocolate banana shake for the road, treat myself >sip in >just chocolate, none of that artificial Gros michel sweet banana taste >oh well, we gotta go, chocolate is fine >girlfriend demands some of my shake as her right >anon didn't you order chocolate banana I heard you say banana I don't taste banana >nah it's cool we're leaving anyway it's not like I lost money or anything >no we gotta get this fixed >tfw everybody else already on the bus >tfw walking out to a line of idling buses just waiting for us >tfw walking all the way to the back of the bus to our friend group with the shake that held everybody up Every time I see a "he asked for no pickles" picture I relive this.

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Anon is scared | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Phantom S--- 03/02/18(Fri) 13:32:59 No.43574613 I'm writing this right after this happened and I'm scared > Be me > Go to take a s--- > Physically feel s--- leave my ass > Look down for results > No s--- in the toilet bowl 39 KB JPG > whatthefuck.png Is my s--- haunted what the f---. Mandela effect? Help. I'm scared.

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Anon comes to a realization | /r/Greentext

Anonymous M 70 KB PNG 09/24/21(Fri)03:09:16 No.86370478 >incels think they are entitle to sex >commies think they're entitled to other people's money Are commies just economic incels?

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Anon is full of helpful advise, among other things | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 340 KB PNG : Anonymous 01/13/23(Fri)21:57:43 No./1815207 >>71815555 # >haven't fapped in many days >horny af >decide to put things up my ass >just feels like I'm s------- and its really uncomfortable I fell for the meme : Anonymous >>71815207 (OP) # i'm gay, and tried fingering my ass (used lotion/albolene as lube two separate occassions) and it barely feels like anything for me. : Anonymous 01/13/23(Fri)22:32:08 No.71815511 01/13/23(Fri)22:34:04 No.71815525 its feels *kinda* nice having something shoved up there but it's nothing that would make me c--. i've just accepted that i'm probably a top 01/13/23(Fri)22:37:20 No.71815554 01/13/23(Fri)22:37:22 No.71815555 : Anonymous >>71815525 # >fingering Of course you can't really feel anything, it's basically impossible to reach it with your fingers properly. If you guys are really opposed to buying a proper prostate massager (They're only $60), take a drum stick, put a condom on it, lube that up, and hit your prostate.

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The reason anon loves Japanese people | /r/Greentext

Yuji Sakai (Deceased) No. 10566850 false the reason i like japanese people is cause they have like really small eyes and stuff and i really like that cause i have a very small weird penis Your fortune: Average Luck 1 reply 2 posters

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ɹǝpun uʍop puɐl ǝɥʇ ɯoɹɟ sᴉ uou∀ | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: SvtK80i9) 02/16/16(Tu >live in Australia >someone tries to rob my house >notice his ground-harness is a bit rusty >throw boomerang at it >it breaks >laugh as he falls into the sun

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anon is a schizo-pilled sigma male | /r/Greentext

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Sweet dreams are made of this | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous HERSTE 78 KB JPG 01/14/23(Sat)17:01:17 No.71821264 > be me > troglodyte tier sleep schedule > fall asleep at ~05:00, wake ~14:00 > spend entire week trying to fix it using Monster energy and loud alarm clock > Think I actually fixed it > ffw to today > Got too comfy watching youtube in my couch > Fell asleep > Just woke 5min ago > My sleep schedule is now 09:00-17:00 > Mfw New semester starts this monday, I'm f-----. :<

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Anon needs enlightenment | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 4 hours ago 10 REPLIES Anonymous 4 hours ago >onions image >thread hidden :) Anonymous 4 hours ago >>71816734 (OP) because the people who made him up needed labor during harsh conditions to continue living lavish lifestyles (for the time of course). 71816734 >If you kill yourself because your life is s---, you WILL spend the rest of eternity in Hell Why is he like this? Anonymous 4 hours ago >play game >game is hard 71816752 >quit game Does this look like winning? 71816761 Anonymous 4 hours ago >>71816734 (OP) I don't think it's 100% settled, but it makes sense. >You're committing the sin of taking a life >since you are taking your own life, there is no opportunity to repent and be forgiven for the sin also Christ said we need to endure till the end. >your life is s--- 71816766 the fact you have a phone/pc to post on the internet proves you have it better than millions of people on earth who are not suicidal. This is a YOU problem. What makes your life so terrible? No gf? Fat? What steps have you taken to improve your life? 2 REPLIES 71816769

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Anon realizes why LOTR is so good | /r/Greentext

File: ggggggggggggg.png (240 KB, 692x753) Gabriella Cázares-Kelly @GabriellaCKelly Rewatched the LOTR trilogy recently and my kid casually says, "this is the only scene where 2 women speak to each other in the whole trilogy." The exchange? A little girl says to Eowyn, "Where's Mama?!" Eowyn shushes her. "Shh!" End scene. Ouch. It also never occurred to me that 1:05 AM-12/20/22 5.2M Views 43.7K Likes 1,772 Retweets 1,274 Quote Tweets Anonymous 01/12/23(Thu)18:39:20 No.179140228 [Reply] >>179147411 >>179147435 >>179147558 >>179140358 >>179140374 >>179140375 >>179140394>>179140399 >>179140426 >>179140456 >>179140482 >>179140490 >>179140783 >>179140785 >>179141391 >>179141828 >>179141879 >>179142159 >>179142187 >>179142458 >>179142517 >>179142597 >>179142698 >>179142898 >>179143016 >>179143080 >>179143129 >>179143134 >>179143227 >>179143276 >>179143419 >>179144075 >>179144208 >>179144278 >>179144319 >>179144385 >>179144425 >>179144536 >>179144561 >>179144847 >>179144883 >>179144933 >>179145249 >>179145659 >>179145709 >>179145840 >>179146225 >>179146544 >>179146986 Damn... Showing all replies. Anonymous 01/12/23(Thu)18:41:37 No.179140313 >>179141549 >>179141975 >>179142205 >>179142247 >>179142861 >>179142941 >>179142983 >>179143002 >>179143235 >>179144104 >>179144127 >>179144152 >>179144175 >>179144197 >>179144319 >>179144456 >>179145482 >>179145485 >>179145517 >>179145590 >>179145649 >>179145709 >>179145752 >>179145797 >>179145806 >>179146577 No wonder it was so good

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Anon doesn't like god very much | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/14/23(Sat)06:43:55 No.71816734 >If you kill yourself because your life is s---, you WILL spend the rest of eternity in Hell Why is he like this?

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Anon finds attention seeker | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Lmao 382 KB JPG 01/12/23(Thu)00:56:46 No.71788756 >be me >just lookingat my insta stories >see one girl asking for dm >surewhynot.png >goes well >i invite her to party >cant on that day >i change it to different day and place closer to her >doesnt like the place >change the place again >she likes it and agrees >almostthere.png >suddenly cancels >k nothing lost move on >be me few days ago >she makes a story again >calls herself forever single >Lmao I am not implying that i am some great Basedus Gigachadicus Maximums i am mostly average all in all but to cancel date at last second and then complain about it is just hilarious

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Greentext Stories - Harry Potter and the Wand in his Pants | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 01/14/23(Sat)17:01:48 No.179208492 >An eery silence filled the atmosphere as Voldemort strided towards Harry. Adrenaline filled Harry's veins as he stepped closer, closer. Each step awoke a lair of dragons in his chest, filling its chambers with a fiery hate that Harry never knew even existed. Closer, Voldemort came, and the snakes in Harry's stomach kept writhing around viciously, each fighting for the opportunity to escape in the most painful way imaginable. 44 KB JPG >Then, Voldemort stopped. He stood at an arms length of Harry, and paused for what felt like an eternity. Voldemort's eyes met Harry's. "So much like your mother's eyes," Harry thought he'd say. Instead, he kept quiet. His stare burned more than any words ever could. Harry had to do something; he wouldn't cower away. Harry looked right back at him in defiance, and allowed his eyes to drink up Voldemort's features. There was no denying it. Even this thing he'd become after all these years could win over the heart of any fair maiden. >Harry suddenly became aware of his body. The dragons screamed hatred in his chest. The snakes planted their fangs deeper, and deeper into his stomach. He felt his blood coursing through his veins. Then he realised where it was headed. >In a heartbeat, Harry drew his wand. Voldemort never even flinched. "He doesn't fear me," Harry thought. Merely the cold, beautiful stare of the murderer, the soulless monster, that lived behind those menacing, mesmerising eyes could instil fear in even the bravest of hearts. >Harry's blood reached its destination, and he knew he wouldn't have much time left. The moment to act was now. >For a brief moment, Harry almost felt like embracing his fate. "No," Harry thought. He grasped his wand tightly in his hand, drawing from deep within him the tickling feeling that is magic, and uttered: "No h---."

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