Anon should get together with her and also start going to the gym with her. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 58 KB JPG 12/29/21 (Wed)22:40:06 No.66770723 >have female friend for years >never attracted to her, she's ugly and fat but nice >suddenly feel romantic attraction to her >want to marry and f--- her where the f--- did this come from? It was practically overnight. 12/29/21 (Wed)22:42:10 No.66770748 : Anonymous >>66770723 (OP) # You got desperate

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Turtle chomp | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >Turtle chomp >Chomp on leaf >Turtle chomp >But have no teeth *Chomp, chomp, chomp* Hahaha. :) 01/13/22(Thu)10:01:12 No.66969223 turtle chomp.jpg 35 KB JPG

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Anon's bloodline is doomed | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >be me >chillin in my room >mom comes in, tells me my sister is gay >kinda figured she was before, haircut, had a couple rainbow flags, thought she was bi tho >now realised my entire family's bloodline relies on me now >me >mfw just f--- my life man, all i feel is limitless guilt doom and despair 14 KB PNG 01/23/21(Sat)17:22:54 No.61999933 I don't even care that she's gay, i support her, but this realisation has just made me feel 1000x worse about it 9 Replies View Thread

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Anon will wake up one day and adhere to such a discipline that he has never displayed even once in his life | /r/Greentext

nonymous 17 KB JPG 11/21/22(Mon)22:10:15 No.710752 >I'll do it tomorrow >I'll magically develop the discipline, commitment, drive and goals that I've lacked for my entire life when I wake up tomorrow >Things will get better then

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Anon has a shitty jeans | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous A curse upon my anoose 160 KB JPG 11/17/22(Thu)14:21:54 No.71020058 >have a pair of jeans like picrel >wore them twice after i bought them >first time i was driving to work >fart >feel ass all greasy and moist >turns out i s--- myself >go home and switch pants, no witnesses >second time im at a bar ,mildly drunk >go to bathroom stall to piss >fart, s--- myself >quickly leave bar and ditch friends,think no one noticed >yesterday i was moving stuff to new apartment >i just spilled coffee on my pants >open drawer, the only pair of jeans left is the ones i s--- myself in TWICE I have a job interview in 30 mins and this is the only pair of pants i have to wear. Already feeling my guts churn and stomach hurting Im going to s--- myself today, arent l?

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Anon likes MASH | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/13/23(Fri)13:31:14 No.179155419 >>179155284 I have fond memories of this despite being younger > Come down stairs one night at age 9/10 at like 2am > Hear the TV on in the lounge > My Dad is watching MASH, Can't remember the episode but Trapper and Hawkeye were stealing blood from Frank whilst he slept > See Hawkeye in a hawaiian shirt and cowboy hat > Episode finishes, expect Dad to shuffle me off to bed > He asks me if I want to watch another > Spend the next few hours watching MASH until the sun comes up > The next day when having tea he brings me a glass of water in a martini glass and calls me Hawkeye Thanks OP for reminding me of this memory

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nick anondams goes to bodega | /r/Greentext

File: mgwxg33oytba1.jpg (40 KB, 640x438) Nick Adams (Alpha Male) @NickAdamsinUSA I was at a bodega this morning when I saw a small boy ask his mother for some candy. As I saw her hand reach for a package of M&Ms, I cried out and left my place in line to stop her. Once I informed her M&Ms had gone woke, she thanked me profusely and opted for a Twix instead. 9:46 AM Jan 13, 2023 42.5K Views 84 Retweets 69 Quote Tweets 715 Likes alpha activities >at bodega >waiting in line blubbering at the mouth wetting myself waiting to scream at something >see infantile child getting some m&ms by their suffering mother ⠀ (ID: /cKcbQQn 01/13/23(Fri)11:05:29 No.16845282 >lessgo.jpg >begin sprinting towards them at Mach 10 >shove the 5-year-old out of the way, concussing him >begin screaming and beating the mom for infecting their Christian child with woke communism gay m&m queer grooming >she and her now-disabled child run off >envelopes detailing her eviction fall out of her purse This is how you stop the woke neo-Marxist mob

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Anon had a peculiar date experience | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 14 KB JPG >next day >date arrives 04/22/18(Sun)16:19:55 No.766669688 >3 days ago >Find girl on meet me >great convo >get along great >she is 19, average build with a cute dorky smile >agree to go on a date next night >5 minutes in she shows me a picture "Oh did you little sister draw that!?" "Lol no I did Anon!!!!" >poker face >shows me a picture of her fridge full of stick figure drawings of her family "....oh very nice." "Lol right!" >shows me her Devianart Page >furry p--- >leave the table >swear off dating for a while

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Anon gets a compliment | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous brootal 01/13/23(Fri)15:19:50 No.71807626 >be me >20 yo >getting some papers for work >lady on the counter is in 40s moderately attractive >"Hello, your id, anon." >"Hmm, why are you bald on your id and now you have hair?" >"I used to shave my hair back then." >"Don't do it again, you have a prettier face now, baldness never brought anything good. Take care." >mfw 135 KB PNG View Thread

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anon gets banned from reddit | /r/Greentext

>soon I will ascend >soon سامة Anonymous (ID: 9iouC1xA 01/12/23(Thu)22:59:15 No.411993822 >be 10th tier jew lord >shekel keeper >sitting in my cave surrounded by gold and jewels given to me by the German government >nobusinesslikeshoahbusiness.jpg >my Palestinian child servants enter my feeding chamber >"L-Lord Rosensteinshekelberg... t-the reuben crops aren't growing" >WHAT?! >how dare they bring me such news >"Myehh!" I screech as I rake a talon across their little faces >after I become bored with beating my servants I slither across my lair and soak myself in a nice warm tub of freshly harvested foreskins and consider how to best remedy the lack of reubens >feelsgood.jpg >I can feel myself growing stronger from the foreskins' essence

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Anon hates processed OJ (you should look at how it's processed and stored) | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 75 KB JPG : Anonymous 142 KB JPG >>892505259 # 01/12/23(Thu)11:52:46 No.892504427 >orange juice from concentrate you shouldn't even be allowed to call this stuff orange juice it's an entirely different product : Anonymous QUACK !!! 01/12/23(Thu)11:54:05 No.892504760 >>892506657 # >>892504427 (OP) # Go f--- yourself : Anonymous >>892504760 # what's the matter dude 01/12/23(Thu)12:07:22 No.892505259 : Anonymous 01/12/23(Thu)12:40:51 No.892506557 >Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice >It said concentrate on the carton 01/12/23(Thu)12:42:09 No.892506619

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Anon and his best friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.24 MB GIF 01/13/23(Fri)12:30:57 No.71806451 >Be me 20min ago >Ask my best friend if I am her best friend >She ask me if she is my best friend >She responds that she thinks of me as a good friend >My heart is ripped out There is no sexual tension btw, I don't see her like that and I am too young for her (about 15 years younger I think) 1 Reply View Thread 01/13/23(Fri)15:16:56 No.71807609 : Anonymous >>71806451 (OP) # where are you getting these best friends that are 15 years older than you

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Anon is not joining | /r/Greentext

How E-girl influencers are trying to get Gen Z into the military LIFE & CULTURE - FEATURE Cosplay commandos are posting nationalist thirst traps to mobilise the SIMPs - but why? 10th January 2023 genz.png 134 KB PNG Roasties are encouraging their beta simps to throw away their lives to protect Chad's harem from foreign forces.

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