Black Widow | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 08/31/21(Tue)14:26:13 No.3912055 >always like spider bros >think they're cool and chill and help out by eating bugs >[spoiler]girlfriend[/spoiler] is deathly afraid of them, jumps whenever she sees one 219 KB PNG >so scared of them that she can't even play video games with spider enemies >even the tarantulas in animal crossing would jumpscare her >absolutely giant one takes residence right outside of our apartment door >see him when I'm coming home from work >cut down his web hoping he'll move somewhere else >next morning, hear girlfriend scream as she leaves for work >the spiderbro remade his web >"please evict this spider" >cut down his web again >he remakes it before my girlfriend even gets home from work >she hands me a pesticide can that she was using for ants >ok.jpg >think this will kill the spider instantly since the can says so >go outside >"sorry bro" >spray the spider >does not kill the spider instantly at all, he starts freaking out in complete agony >"oh f--- oh f---" >l have to make sure he's dead now >continue spraying >the agony just gets worse >feeling awful at this point but I can't let him suffer longer >have to use a metric fuckton of spray until he finally dies >still twitching >just to be sure he isn't suffering any longer, go inside to grab a paper towel, smush him, and flush down the toilet >gf is understanding of my guilt despite hating spiders and also feels bad for giving me the pesticide spray >the next morning see the web remnants sticking to the railings and feel an immense emptiness Anyone else know this feel? I don't think I've ever felt this guilty about anything in my life. Poor spiderbro didn't do anything wrong. I could have definitely just put him in a jar and moved him somewhere else too, I didn't have to kill him. Hell even smashing him would have been better. I did an awful thing.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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