Anon is a liar | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Tell me what you aren't telling others + 155 replies and 13 images omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 10/24/24(Thu)21:53:04 No.926449688 >>926449301 dont have a ton of time but here it is as best as I remember it >be me, 16 or so >bored as f--- >find random house in phone book, like 5 miles away >go sit at end of their block and just watch the family come and go >notice mom is kind of hot >start following her around some >arrange to go grocery shopping same time as her >put weird stuff in her cart when she isn't looking - like baby oil and huge cucumbers >start calling from pay phones and leave messages like "hey Beth, this is Harold. It was great seeing you at the gym today but I think we all know better." >buy condoms >drop them in her purse at grocery >keep calling, always keep messages short >One time -- and this took a while to set up -- stole a pair of my mom's panties and j----- in them. left them in my car all crusty. followed her husband to the hardware store on a sspring day, dropped them under the seat of his car. >anyway, one day was sitting down the block and heard the door slam and he came screaching down the block and t boned another car. > left them alone for a while but went back a month or so later and only her car was ever there.

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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I would've shoved it in some hoe and DNA test the baby so I can track whoever did this tbh | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 91 KB JPG changed 10/25/24(Fri)00:24:36 No.79233836 >be me >broke college student in mid college >doing projects at a secluded corner of my library without any CCTV(cause I love privacy) >went to toliet without asking someone to watch my stuff >went back, nothing seems to have >skips to the next day >pulls out out biology notes from backpack >it was half soaked with some weird sticky substance >smells it, it was c--. >checks backpack >tfw some couple doing the devil's tango threw a used condom in my backpack because they can't be bothered to throw that s--- to the bin upstairs I'd rather just have a street n---- steal my s--- at this point man what the actual f--- is wrong with college couples

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Wavey sensation | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 96 KB PNG >Into crossdressing 10/24/24(Thu)14:18:18 No.79231786 >Turned on by my own body smell >Turned on seeing my own body in the mirror, specially the ass, but my entire naked body just turns me on >Like to gaze for minutes on end at my face >Love my long wavy hair (that women find pretty) >Like getting things in my ass and c------ hands free BUT >Only ever fallen in love with women >Have never gotten a slight bit of attraction towards another man >Disgusted by gay p--- Serious question: Am I gay?

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Weirdly attractive | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 90 KB JPG 10/24/24(Thu)11:19:25 No.79230917 >finally get a gf >become more misogynist Women have life on easy mode and they have no idea how good they have it. If my gf was a man she'd be elliot rodgers >shorter than average >less endowed than her peers >graduated with a worthless degree >is a NEET >shy and introverted >is a halfu with a weird racial complex But because she's a woman with self control (isn't overweight) 90% of heterosexual men would marry her on the spot if she asked.

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Disney Anon | /r/Greentext

File: thephantommenace.jpg (723 KB, 2048x1527) Anonymous 10/19/24(Sat)05:10:57 No.204652454 >>204652499 >>204652531 >>204652542 >>204652639 >>204652685 >>204652834 >>204652912 >>204653061 >>204653123 >>204653193 >>204653261 >>204653295 >>204653359 >>204653694 >summer 1999 >watching TPM in theaters. >utterly horrified >keep thinking "what the f--- is this?" and "this isn't star wars" >watch documentary about the making of TPM >at the end, all the executives watch an early screening >all staring helplessly, horrified, at the abomination that has been created >they later say "this is what happens when you give george lucas carte blanche" >years later >the dialogue is so terrible it gets turned into countless memes made by people who aren't aware the dialogue is terrible how the f--- did people get brainwashed into thinking this was a good movie?

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Nice guy incel | /r/Greentext

Anonymous How do I stop being blackpille(...) 290 KB JPG 10/24/24(Thu)12:19:47 No.32205258 >be me >nice guy incel >see Andrew Tate blow up a couple of years ago >think he's full of s---, a grifter and the only type of girls he'd get are hoes and skanks >continue to self-improoooove >fast forward two years later >still an incel >go outside, see girls in my workplace talking about guys like Tate >start thinking he may have a point after all Am I being retarded?

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It's over for anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 91 KB JPG 10/22/24(Tue)21:30:35 No.204765370 >Short wolverine scene >All girls in audience burst out laughing >"OMG, HE'S UNDER 6' AHAHAHAHA!" >"EWW, WHY IS WOLVERINE AN INCEL?" >"YOU CAN TELL HE'S A VIRGIN LOL!" >Try to get up to leave >They can tell I'm 5'10 and they start throwing popcorn and soda at me >Entire theater boos as I try to run away >Trip and fall down >Girl looks down and says "you'll never have me" Why are movies always like this nowadays? I didn't choose to be born this way.

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we have peaked as a society | /r/Greentext

... Anonymous 05/14/23(Sun)17:37:47 No.58197478 ようこそ! けもケットへ 2 自衛官募集中 https://www.mod.go.jp/gsdf/jleikanbosyu/index.html >>58195261 (OP) # UwU.png 2.34 MB PNG >5th largest military in the world is officially using a gay furry both as it's mascot and for recruitment Every time I think we've reached peak clownworld, we just keep going further. Honk honk. >>58197503 # >>58197583 # >>58197652 # >>58198357 # >>58199054 # >>58199123 # >>58199900 #

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Your enemy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.18 MB PNG 10/23/24(Wed)22:49:27 No.79225272 >get my 1st gf at 26 >younger bro by 5 years hangs around when she comes over >keeps finding excuses to take his shirt off (he's jacked) >see keeps checking him out and giving him attention W--? I don't want to break up already, I lost my virginity to this girl. But she's disrespecting me. Can I still salvage this?

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Anon Likes Rorschach | /r/Greentext

File: R0R5CH4RCH3928.jpg (29 KB, 375x500) ☐ Anonymous 10/24/24(Thu)06:20:05 No.204783957 >>204784020 >>204784038 >>204784582 >>204785544 >>204785669 >>204786959 >>204787052 >>204791634 >>204791696 >>204791746 >>204791895 >>204792066 >>204792705 >>204794158 >>204794482 >>204795141 >>204795826 >>204799611 >>204799720 >Moore recalls thinking that Rorschach would be seen as a satirical character. In spite of giving the masked figure an "abhorrent personality", Moore admits that he failed to realize "people in the audience would find such a figure admirable". Moore even describes his surprise when he discovered Watchmen had a large, right-wing fanbase. In his boldest declaration, Moore says that if his stories can be that misinterpreted "it does make you wonder what the point of doing it was". ☐ Anonymous 10/24/24(Thu)06:20:44 No.204783967 He's LITERALLY me. ☐ Anonymous 10/24/24(Thu)06:23:28 No.204784038 ►>>204784059 >>204784284 >>204784439 >>204785069 >>204785368 >>204794159 >>204796359 >>204783957 (OP). >wh-what? People actually like a vigilante that brutalizes criminals and kills murderous pedophiles? >ahhh I'm going insane! Why do lefties misunderstand how normal people think so often? ☐ Anonymous 10/24/24(Thu)06:32:33 No.204784284 ► >>204784038 Because they're mostly pedophiles. They were molested as kids and think it's ok. ☐ Anonymous 10/24/24(Thu)06:56:01 No.204784819 >>204793176 >>204795116 >>204796682 File: ozymandias-veidt-cat-scre(...).jpg (203 KB, 1101x598) JUST ME AND THE WORLD. >>204785585 NERY'S >comic about a gay elitist who feels entitled to kill millions for "the greater good" What did Moore mean by this? ☐ Anonymous 10/24/24(Thu)07:34:13 No.204785711 >>204789705 >Why are people interpreting a character named Rorschach differently than I do?

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Anon doesn't have a boyfriend | /r/Greentext

Anonymous HELL YEA HEE HEE THAT RITE BE TIGHT HEE 876 KB PNG 10/24/24(Thu)09:53:12 No.79230454 How do you get your boyfriend to stop ignoring you for days if he: -Isn't attracted to you, so nudes don't work -Doesn't care about you, so suicide or self harm threats don't work, even if you actually do it -Doesn't care about you x2, so threatening to break up won't work -Dislikes you, so any suggestion of doing anything together won't work -Already has money, so buying him a gift won't work Thanks! 99 Replies / 4 Images View Thread

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Conflict at the entrance | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 31 KB GIF 10/24/24(Thu)00:05:32 No.79226024 >Be me last year, 25 year old. >still love LEGOS. >Decide to spend entire paycheck on the latest Star Wars set. >Not just any set, but the TIE Interceptor. >originally sold for $100 but is now around $1000. >get a sweet deal and get it for only $800. >call parents because of how happy I feel and they dont care at all and ask how I will pay rent. >say that I think landlord will understand. >Start building, having such a lot of fun. >Two weeks later, landlord knocking on my door. >"Where rent? It due last week" >Show landlord the TIE Interceptor and explain I had to buy it because it was a good deal. >"why would I give a care about a Star War thing?" He is lithuanian or whatever so I guess they didnt get star wars. >says I have to pay rent by the end of the week or I'll be evicted because this isnt the first instance I've done this kind of thing. >end up having to sell the TIE Interceptor. >only get $300 for it because I took it out of the box and used it. >rent is $600. >go to landlord and explain and apologise and say I will get the rest of the cash but this is all I have. >"wife leave recently, I need to see girls again, so I need shaving back" >"you need your back shaved?. Tfw I had to shave his back once a week for nearly a year until he forgave the rent I didn't pay

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The lesser of two evils | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/11/24(Fri)13:21:38 No.17162226 main-qimg-09090768382a6bf73bb3729532e22b9b-lq.jpg 43 KB JPG >Everyone treats Hitler like Satan while they never treat Stalin with any contempt! Why is this such a common Nazi cope? Did they forget that the US spent 50 years in a geopolitical cold war with the regime Stalin created? Or the hiring of Nazi officers to government jobs and the Red Scare in the post-war years?

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Know Your Meme

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