OP swears it was the Shadowman | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 12/20/20(Sun)09:03:39 No.27095947 >>27093470 >boning my gf >doggystyle, she's loving it >my d--- is 7.5in easily >she achieves orgasm (as usual) when 5 KB JPG suddenly I feel like I'm being watched >pubes suddenly stand on end >gf doesn't notice, and I maintain my rhythmic thrusting, making her c-- again with my rock hard 8 incher >but something feels off >reach for my rechargeable Maglite RL1019 and scan the room >gf mumbles "what the f---" as waves of pleasure sweep through her body >a strange sulfuric smell fills the room, smells like the huevos rancheros and refried beans I had for breakfast >I turn around >there's a tall dark figure standing behind me >he wasn't there before >feels like he's feeding off of my virility, like a vampire >panic.jpg >I begin to thrust ferociously >gotta make my gf c-- one more time before dealing with the strange apparition/demon >as gf achieves orgasm (again, as usual), I pull out my solid 9 inch woody and blast my load all over the dark entity >I hear a hiss as the j--- hits his shadowy form and the spectre lets out a piercing cry >once more, the stench of sulfur fills the room >the floor is covered in c-- and a strange black-ish substance >gf asks, "did you f------ fart??" >I tell her it was the shadowman >somehow she didn't see him (paranormal) >"Oh my f------ god Josh did you s--- on the ground?" >it was the shadowman bitch >I swear to god

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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