Anon takes his relationship to the next level | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

monymous 04/08/24(Mon)18:30:32 No.14141618 >have gf for 8 months now >she tried to become a gymnast then an actress, works as a clown in a children's hospital for nearly two years now >says we should take our relationship to the next level >asks me if I want role-play in the bedroom >tell her I want to bone her dressed as clown >first surprised but agrees >next night go over to her place >fuckingclowngf.mp4 >c-- the biggest nut of my life inside her >cuddling post-coitus >all of a sudden she says "oh almost forgot something" >opens the drawer and pulls out a pie with cream topping and a clown horn >shoves the pie in my face >"ok, we are even now :^)" >honkhonk.mp3 should I put a ring on her?

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Hard to find the perfect nectar that the glorious goddess will bless me with of my liking.(I'm not a simp) | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/23/23(Mon)20:02:57 No.28187105 File: 1375486401415.png (17 KB, 558x528) >>28174133 (OP). >Do you guys care if a female has a innie or outie p----? At this point I can only say... Beggars can't be choosers.

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Anon just want friends | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 49 KB JPG 04/08/24(Mon) 12:57:21 No.77061393 >get invited to a small server >for autists >Join thinking maybe I'd find frens >There is conversation >Join in >Only first five seconds hey talk to me >Later start ignoring me >wait a bit >Try to be apart of conversation >Still get talked over >Leave feeling sad Normies, autists, adhdcels f------ everyone does this only thing I want is frens and a connection >I'll be frens with you anon Don't I've f------ had that promise before h-------- View Thread

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goes outside once | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 111 KB PNG >look some stuff up 04/08/24(Mon) 13:52:37 No.916563005 >walking outside at night >no flashlight >notice some movement >turn on phone light >hundreds of worms carpeting the ground >they all vanish back into the dirt at warp speed >"there are an average of 500 earthworms per square meter of rich topsoil" You c---- that told me to "go outside" and "touch grass" can go f--- yourselves.

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MURICA | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1245/10000 2000 drawing challenge 3000 beat saber w 3d model he is an actual giraffe Snaxia 3D! matthew7159 You met him in gm6134: EL 04/06/24(Sat)15:00:01 No.73118868 1447 ENTEVA Untitled.png 2.13 MB PNG She has an American flag in her room when she's: -Not American -Living in Japan Why? Why do retarded people like her do stupid s--- like this? : Anonymous 04/06/24(Sat) 15:01:32 No.73118935 Because America is the greatest nation on earth and Jesus's favorite country and if you disagree you're a f----- terrorist commie >>73119046 # >>73119986 # >>73121594 # >>73121780 # >>73122603 # >>73123947 # >>73124078 # >>73126795 # >>73127155 # >>73128254 # >>73129972 # >>73130215 # >>73130619 # >>73145942 # >>73146717 # >>73147017 # >>73155023 # >>73156199 # >>73158314 # >>73160231 # >>73160619 # >>73160904 # >>73162773 # >>73163556 # >>73164225 # >>73166062 # >>73169021 # >>73169392 # >>73169645 #

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Did Nat See That Cumming | /r/Greentext

▼Settings Mobile Home 04/08/24(Mon)03:01:54 No.77060273 Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Plebbiter encounters chad Nazi r/pics 7 hr. ago Popular on Reddit right now Nazi spotted at the gym in Long Island. New York WAFFEN 88 ✩ 38K ⇓ 6.2K ↑ Share 350 KB PNG Join >Gets intimidated by chad nazi at the gym because he was there >Takes a Picture of him from behind >Posts on r/pics >38k Updoots in 7 hours What the f---? Anonymous >>77060273 (OP) 04/08/24(Mon)03:03:00 No.77060278 Heh. I can imagine how hard the circlejerk in the comments under that post must be.

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Anon is gonna lose a toe | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 3.47 MB GIF delicious 04/08/24(Mon)07:07:32 No.20381545 >bake something that has 2-3 cups of sugar in it >to me it tastes like I could've added 2 more cups of sugar >to other people it tastes delicious and sweet >eat walmart s--- from the bakery like donuts or brownies >tastes super sweet as f--- and Is there something f------ wrong with me? Or is it just that processed foods have copious amounts of corn syrup making it sweeter? Every time I bake and even add EXTRA sugar, it's like I didn't add much sugar at all. : Anonymous 04/08/24(Mon)07:08:59 No.20381554 >Is there something f------ wrong with me? You have a case of Americanitus, I'm sorry to break the news but it's terminal

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Anon needs to buy new socks | /r/Greentext

Anonymous this post has been fact checked by real senseis TRUE 1.89 MB GIF 21 Replies 1 Image 04/08/24(Mon)02:39:50 No.77057301 >boyfriend has extreme anger issues >he tries to put on multiple pairs of socks in a row but they all have holes in them >he screams "WHY DO THEY ALL HAVE F------ HOLES IN THEM! I HATE HAVING F------ HOLES IN MY SOCKS! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" >feel very scared View Thread

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Anon likes straight men | /r/Greentext

381 KB JPG >Coolest character ever created >Is gay Why god why

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German on dat simp simp | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Gi1YJZrE 04/07/22(Thu)13:12:10 No.371607175 >>371606882 # who cares about richer. if you are good looking and my gf likes you can have sex with her and I watch, I dont have a problem with that. at the end of the day she is with me though, you are merely a pleasurity, a boy-toy, used once and discarded without an afterthought >>371607392 # >>371607455 # >>371607594 # >>371608114 # >>371609090 # Anonymous (ID: DMLBNENU Anonymou +I had a vasectomy yesterd 791 04/07/22(Thu)13:14:39 No.371607455 >>371607175 # And they say Germans have no sense of humor

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Apparently I'm 40 (I'm 27) | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.66 MB GIF 03/01/22(Tue)04:59:11 No.67610990 Turning 25 in an hour. Feel so old its making me super depressed 03/01/22(Tue)05:00:28 No.67610998 Anonymous >>67610990 (OP) # I'm 35. Shut the f--- up.

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Anon gets his wife a friend | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Jk3zNwC1 04/08/24(Mon)04:24:57 No.464287643 Dunno if I should consider myself a success or failure half the time >Married 12 years with three kids, wife is fantastic >Wife is sad because she has no friends, everyone around is extreme lib and she hates >Meet some hippy girl in her early 20s online, despite politics realize she would get along well with my wife >They become friends, wife finds out girl likes me >Wife invites her to live with us >Lots of degeneracy, wife is way happier I dunno lads I just dunno. At least the kids just believe she is the live in maid, and she is fantastic at cleaning all sorts of things. >>464287739 # >>464287899 #

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Luck maxxing | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/09/18(Fri)09:17:38 No.43724833 >bought a $1 lottery ticket >won $16 93 KB JPG 12 Replies / 3 Images View Thread

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