Anon pranks himself into an existential crisis | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 01/24/24(Wed)12:11:36 No.912879480 >be me >Make secondary snap to play a prank on some girls in my contacts >Go into this reddit account with a bunch of pics of some Chad >Starts sending pics and some of his nudes using a trick that makes it look like a live snap >Actually got several nudes from girls I had no chance at getting them from because they know me, and they got bf's 19 KB PNG >Overwhelming feeling of joy and sadness because it couldn't be me >One of them used to send me nudes but no longer does because she's apparently down and busy >Gets confirmation that it was indeed a BS excuse and it was easy AF to get her to spread her legs for me Honestly this s--- just made me f------ depressed. I was so close to this one girl, and she just distanced herself because a lot of s--- is going through her life. Some random guy was enough to make her horny enough to make it forget all, something that I could not do with all of my support. I'm not a bad looking guy, I didn't have a fight with these girls or whatever, but I guess some women can't help themselves when they see hot new d---. We are still close but what's broken cant ever return to the way it was... F--- this s---

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon gets his daughter circumcised | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: XlkyYGfH ) == Circumcised 01/24/24(Wed)10:28:57 No.456291466 >be me >confront parents of why they let some k--- cut my d--- up >they laugh and give the standard reasons and then tell me it's done and to get over it >have a daughter >fly over to a Muslim country and have her circumcised with the most brutal version of female circumcism (there are variation) >record it and send them a video while telling them it's cleaner, more ascetically pleasing, and now she will be able to pass vagina inspection day >parents are furious mom calls me crying and I think she vomited and called me a monster dad told me I wasn't welcome in their house anymore and I tell them I'm just trying to give me little girl the same opportunity I had. Why are gen x parents like this? I literally did the same thing they did to me and I did to her and they act like I'm a monster. W-- Also I dropped my daughter off at an orphanage because I don't want to waste my time raising a woman. 22 KB JPG

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Crafty Cassanova | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/23/24(Tue)11:17:02 No.912831598 >match with lots of women on dating apps >find out a few are virgins >charm them to take them home and f--- them for the first time, with hidden cameras capturing every "first" for them >organize each woman into a folder with their name, nudes, and vids

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frfr ong no cap he spittin' | /r/Greentext

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Anon and the Ozone | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: ytRC3zqd) The ozone scam, and DuPont No.389008544 Remember the hole in the ozone layer..... let me redpill you on what happened. DuPont invented and held the patent for r12. R12 is an extremely efficient refrigerant. Anybody with an old r12 car or refrigerator can attest. R12 cools better than r134, and also operates at a lower pressure. Late r12 a/c systems were bullet proof and many are still operating on their original pre 1994 charge ATC NATIONAL REFRIGERANT 12 07/30/22(Sat)18:16:55 56 KB JPG DuPont who had the patent for r12 understood this patent would expire in 1979. This was the time of a massive boom in air conditioning adoption. >patent expires in 1979 >ozone hole gets discovered in 1978/1979 The fed said cfc's were the cause, and allowed DuPont to continue sole manufacturing of r12 until the "switch". This bought DuPont from 1979- 1994 total control of the refrigerant market. R134 came alone. Guess who patented r134? DuPont. So now DuPont had total control of the market agsin, a market designed around an inferior product and planned obsolence. Modern ac systems are s---, they are extremely finicky, and run high pressure which makes leaks appear. Right when the r134 parent was coming up to expiration, new data showed r134 to also be bad for the environment. Same s--- again.

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anon's lifehack | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 54 KB JPG >>76223409 # Anonymous >>76223398 (OP) # How did it taste, smugjak? >>76223416 # Anonymous >be me >poop in toilet >have idea Anonymous >>76223401 # it tasted like poop 01/23/24(Tue)20:33:55 No.76223398 >take poop out >eat it >>76223425 # >repoop the poop infinite poop 01/23/24(Tue)20:34:28 No.76223401 01/23/24(Tue)20:34:59 No.76223409 01/23/24(Tue)20:35:35 No.76223416 >>76223409 # S----- answer hope you die : Anonymous >>76223416 # says the one with finite poop 01/23/24(Tue)20:36:11 No.76223425

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Anon is insensitive | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: 2V/9R758) 06/22/12 (Fri)21:01:40 No.407791729 >took wife shopping for her birthday >hate going shopping but thought i'd treat her to a day out that she deserves >walked past department store >three girls, couldn't have been older than 18-20 walk past > for a joke I say "bet you wish you had legs like that!" >she starts crying and overreacting, can't seem to calm her down > had to stop and let her calm down before wheeling her up the ramp into the next store >what the f--- is wrong with women?

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