Oh s--- its to bad | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 80 KB JPG 06/24/19(Mon)02:13:34 No.802999512 >im a girl >go to an all girl catholic school >meet this nice girl >she tells me to go to the bathroom with her 50 KB JPG >okay > mfw shes making out with me in the bathrooms >wait >does this make me gay : Anonymous 06/24/19(Mon)02:15:07 No.802999638 >>802999512 (OP) # >im a girl

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon is not a mathematician | /r/Greentext

im guna kes 17 KB JPG >be me, 7yo >math class >"alright class, can you solve 25-20 ?" >raise hand >"yes anon?" >"it's -5 !" >teacher looks at me awkwardly >"w-well yes but you are not supposed to know that" >wat >"see class, you can't substract a number if the first number in the operation is greater than the second one, since there is nothing inferior to zero" >WAT >"but teach whenever I watch the weather report, when it's cold we see negative numbers !" (i'm in celsius, -1C is 30F for reference) >"yes but you're supposed to learn that later" >"but I know it now" >"it's just for this lesson, don't worry, just write it down" >"why would I write something false ?" >start throwing a tantrum because even tho i'm right, i'm also f------ seven >get a note in my notebook for bad behavior >parents confiscate my pokemon cards >can't make a stance for myself because I can't argue without crying it's been 15 years and I still remember it. 4 Replies View Thread : Anonymous >>67713133 (OP) # >alright class, can you solve 25-20 ? >it's -5! absolute retard. 03/09/22(Wed)20:10:24 No.67713155

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Anon tries to get a girlfriend | /r/Greentext

Heaven on earth images (1) (3).jpg 45 KB JPG >Be me >In high school >A chick and I develop feelings for each other >Talk to each other for a while >Everything's going smoothly >Until one day, she lifts her skirt up and shows me her thighs >Scar marks >Those scars spelled out my name >Bitch literally took a knife and carved my name out on her thigh >I was just like >Man that's hot asf Wanted to ask her out for a date but she ended up killing herself

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Anon listens to ASMR | /r/Greentext

File: 1673467246723423.png (165 KB, 3000x1950) >ten minutes in, girl whispers >"im here..." Anonymous 09/02/23 (Sat) 15:39:03 No.74598306 >>74598320 >GFE ASMR pops up in my recommended videos one day >decide to give it a go >lie down >put on my headphones >"i understand..." >"ill love you no matter what, and you can always come and lay on my chest whenever you need, okay?" >start tearing up is this the kind of s--- normies take for granted? ill never forgive them, not for as long as i live

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Anon asked a question | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/30/21(Wed)13:41:38 8 KB JPG No.64377723 >walking to convenience store to buy snacks >see random girl, about my age with a nirvana shirt on >me: "hey whats your favorite nirvana song?" >her: "i dont know" >me: "but youre wearing the shirt" >her: "please stop" >me: "what?" >her: "youre being creepy" >me: "define creepy" >her: "no... just leave me alone please"

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Anon finds a hobby | /r/Greentext

09/02/23(Sat)10:57:02 No.74596701 a few years ago i thought it would be funny to dress up as a girl and troll people on omegle, as a joke, of course, but ended up liking the attention, the clothes, the feeling, and the aesthetics that came with it. i stopped because i wanted to get more masculine, but that never happened. i'm thinking about starting up again, and now that i'm out of my parents' house, i'll be able to with much more freedom. : Anonymous SLAVERY NEEDS YOU 55 KB JPG should i? do i give it a try? i'm not a t----- but i am skinny and have a feminine face when it's shaved and taken care of.

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Anon went to a Black-majority school | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/02/23(Sat)14:41:55 No.905409169 >>905411351 >Be me >White kid in majority-Black high school >10th grade, chemistry class >Everyone doing chemistry experiments at Bunsen burners >Hear a loud thud, clearly something heavy fell >Instinctually turn my head towards the sound >See Black kid hurriedly bend down and pick something up >It looks like a handgun magazine >holyfuckingshit.mp4 >I must be imagining things, right? >FFW like 10-15 minutes later >Hear another loud thud >Quickly turn my head towards the sound >See same Black kid quickly pick something up >Get a good look this time >I'm 99% certain it's a handgun magazine >ohmyfuckinggod.jpeg >Panicked, trying to think of what to do >Come up with idea >Ask teacher to use restroom >She allows me to go >Once outside of the classroom, bolt ass down to the principal's office >Tell him what I saw >Luckily, the principal takes me seriously (probably because I'm White, tbh) >He gets ahold of the school cop posthaste >Once cop is filled in on what's going on, he barges into the classroom and asks to see Black kid in the hallway >Black kid begrudgingly goes into the hallway >Cop does a pat-down and discovers that the Black kid has a handgun and multiple loaded magazines >Everyone in the classroom freaking out >totalchaos.webm >Cop slaps handcuffs on Black kid and escorts him away >That kid ends up getting expelled >School installs metal detectors throughout the building less than two weeks later Why yes, I loved going to a Black-majority school, anon. How could you tell?

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Anon wants to talk about politics | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/08/21 (Mon)00:53:13 No.849071227 126 KB PNG >be me >I wanna talk about some politics >go to /pol/ >"Jewish people and minorities are the cause of the worlds issues." >w--.jpg >go to twitter >"all white people are inherently racist and homophobic." >w-- that's not true >go to reddit >"communism has never failed" >have you people taken a single history class?? >go to facebook >"if I see another sheep wearing a mask I'm going to gun them down" >huh??? What happened to normal political views?

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Anon holds his pp in his pp | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Piss man 09/01/23(Fri)20:26:47 No.905383654 >be me >gf is down for some sexy time >have to piss but already hard so give up >go in for the kill >thrust away >can't c-- because of the piss >Minutes turn into hours, hours into days >give gf numerous orgasms but can't c-- >I now drink third a gallon before sexy time 492 KB PNG Have any of you other anons tried piss retention?

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Dra'nakyuek, Destroyer of Worlds | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/18/15(Wed)03:12:19 No.598927615 >>598927815 >>598927926 >>598929305 File: 1412379029099.jpg (60 KB, 604x453) don't be to rude thanks~ ^_^ Anonymous 02/18/15(Wed)03:14:02 No.598927926 >>598927615 Hey Kimmy. I like your new glasses. Hi, Tiffany. The curls are looking sweet. 'Sup, Dra'nakyuek, Destroyer of Worlds. Congrats on stomping that village yesterday. >>598929028 >>598929097 >>598929134 >>59

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Anon about African warfare. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >>79675930 # This reminds me of something I read from the Bush War 02/22/17(Wed)09:11:28 No.79676775 >Rhodies recover enemy rifles after each engagement >They keep finding rifles with the rear sight dialed in to the highest setting, practically f------ indirect fire >They are extremely confused by this >Eventually they ask a prisoner about it during interrogation >Literally none of them know what the sights are for, they think that choosing the bigger number makes the gun shoot harder Warfare in Africa is truly unbelievable >>79678011 # >>79678022 # >>79678742 #

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Average /fit/ thread | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I'm desperate for protein 22 KB JPG 3 Replies / 2 Images Anonymous Alright, just this once. >>71269432 # : Anonymous Let me suck your c---. Don't let my gains fade away. 35 KB JPG 06/13/23(Tue)18:14:57 No.71268869 View Thread 06/13/23(Tue)18:16:15 No.71268879 06/13/23(Tue)19:32:54 No.71269432 >>71268879 # You've been eating pineapple huh?

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He ShOuLd StArT tHrOwInG tHeM bAcK | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 143 KB PNG what do i do 02/11/19(Mon) 20:26:32 No.792417785 >in my room >dad yelling at me because abusive >calls me a retard >autism kicks in > "takes one to know one" he's throwing bottles at me now

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