Why Are Sonic Fans Warning Moviegoers Not To Cheer When Maria Dies In 'Sonic The Hedgehog 3?' The Viral Memes Explained
What Is The 'Sharon's Burnt Marie Callender Pie' Meme? The Thanksgiving Burned Pie Meme Explained
Is Chis-Chan Having A Kid And Who Is 'Flutter?' The Rumor About The Lolcow's Potential Child Explained
What Does 'Ningning Is The Maknae' Mean? The Viral Memes About The 'Aespa' K-Pop Idol Explained
What Is The '2006 Volleyball Incident' And Is It Real? The Viral Conspiracy Theory Explained

African village terrorised by gay baboon who recently r---- 5 men DOOGBE >be me >finally muster up the courage to ask my crush out on a date 57 KB JPG >decide to take her to a fancy restaurant to impress her >we're having a great time until suddenly we hear a loud noise from above >a raccoon drops down from the ceiling, hissing and foaming at the mouth >people are screaming and running in every direction, but my date and I freeze in fear >the raccoon charges at us and I try to defend her, but it's no use >it bites me on the arm and I feel an involuntary bowel movement >my date is horrified and starts to panic >we manage to escape to the bathroom, but it's too late for me >I sit there in embarrassment, I hear a commotion outside >turns out the police have been called and are in a standoff with the raccoon >more involuntary bowel movements >I'm still stuck in the bathroom, wondering how I'm going to explain the mess >eventually, the police manage to catch the raccoon and it's all over but the damage has been done >the cops manage to catch the raccoon, but not before it bites a few people >they also notice the mess in the bathroom and accuse me of public indecency >I try to explain the situation, but they don't believe me >my date is traumatized and I'm humiliated >I try to apologize and explain, but she's having none of it >she leaves the restaurant in a hurry and I'm left sitting there, feeling like a complete idiot lesson learned, always be prepared for unexpected situations and never underestimate the power of a wild animal.

Share Pin Download More

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: jpg

Resolution: (828px x 1628px)

File size: 177 KB

☐ Anonymous 11/25/24(Mon) 10:39:13 No. 17295889 >>17295909 >>17295925 >>17295935 >>17295976 >win independence >DON'T devolve into military dictatorship or absolute monarchy >start off with fresh land and an unusually high literacy rate >neighbors are retarded savages who live at the mercy of nature >large ocean between them and European chimpouts >shitgoesdown.jpg >"here tovarish buy my land I need to fund a chimpout" >ok > "here America buy my land, I need to fund my own le chimpout" >ok >"hey America there was a chimpout in Texas we'll join you (and won't secede later) if you help" >ok >*doubles land in two years* It's amazing how well they took advantage of what they had. Many nations have completely fumbled the bag during their development. What went so right?

Anonymous (ID: Lvuvmf4p 11/21/24(Thu)03:45:24 No.489109549 16 KB JPG >4chan known as a right-wing Nazi haven >allows all types of opinions and rhetoric >X known as a right-wing Nazi haven >allows all types of opinions and rhetoric >reddit known as a left-wing haven >bans anyone posting anything even slightly right of center >bluesky quickly becoming known as a left-wing haven >bans anyone posting anything even slightly right of center Really makes you think.

Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Anonymous (ID: 7KXnZ81d) Republicucks ▼ Settings Mobile Home 11/24/24(Sun)17:17:53 No.489470595 Tom Cotton Threatens to Invade Holland to Protect Israel's Government From ICC Arrest Warrant Phillip Nieto Nov 21st, 2024, 4:18 pm 796 comments X Post reddit MR. COTTON 242 KB PNG >"America first" >"One of our allies doesn't like our presi--- I mean, Israeli prime minister? We must invade that terrorist state!!!!" I wonder who really is in charge of America at this point.

View All 43,887 Images

More:

Anons first momery | /r/Greentext

File: Sun Baby_Intro.PNG.png (572 KB, 1024x576) >pic rel >my mom leans over and playfully says >"that's you, you're a little baby" >perfectly understand >tfw my first memory was of watching tv First memory thread Anonymous 05/02/23(Tue)00:46:05 No.898548812>>898548987 >>898549210 >>898549353 >>898549359 >>898549801 >be me >in diapers >maybe 2 yrs old >in bouncer in front of TV >the teletubbies baby sun is rising and the intro is playing

Pin

anon misses his friend, plays 40k to remember him (sorry if repost) | /r/Greentext

16 KB PNG >Me and childhood friend get into warhammer together when we were 10 >Friend gets Dark Angels and i get IG >Played alot of 2vs2 games and he would always deepstrike his deathwing to protect my artillery >Painted models to look like us >Friend died from cancer 5 years ago and left all of his warhammer stuff to me >Always bring an allied detachment of dark angels deathwing now >Always have them deepstrike to protect my basilisks >Have won me many games including one where the model representing my friend rolled four sixes in melee and slaughtered a daemon prince >His models always seem to roll well It hurts, Anons.

Pin

Anon figured out philosophy | /r/Greentext

TE Philosophy is so easy Anonymous 05/01/23(Mon)23:01:32 No.898543293 >>898543394 >be me >think >am I think I got this philosophy stuff figured out pretty well /b/ros □ Anonymous 05/01/23(Mon)23:02:37 No.898543348 909512210

Pin

Anon requests for a hug | /r/Greentext

Minza >go to hug mum >she dabs on me instead mummy no

Pin

All Women are the same | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/01/23 (Mon)14:07:06 No.28866843 52739.jpg 3.58 MB JPG >put a roof under her head >feed her the best quality food >pour her the purest water straight from a new Mountain Valley Spring bottle >take her to the best veterinarian in the City >buy her any toy she wants to keep her entertained >treat her like a queen >respect her privacy >TFW I'm basically her paypig >in return; she hisses at me for causing any minor inconvenience >bites me if i touched her in some way >doesn't respect my personal space, >won't sit on my lap >probably sees the neighbor's cat behind my back

Pin

Anon tries to understand magnets and fails | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 55 KB JPG 06/06/21(Sun)21:58:34 No.13245981 EXPLAIN TO ME WHY THE MAGNETIC FORCE IS PERPENDICULAR TO THE MAGNETIC FIELD OR I WILL F------ KILL YOU. DON'T DUMB IT DOWN OR I WILL KILL YOU. IF YOU SAY F = qu x B WITHOUT EXPLAINING WHY, I WILL F------ KILL YOU.

Pin

Anon gets angry | /r/Greentext

File: images (1).jpg (17 KB, 443x332) Anonymous 07/01/18(Sun)18:12:56 No. 1936758319369514>>19369519>>1936954619370017 >>19371950 >>19374860 >>19375705 >>1937695919376965 >>19377345 >>19377486 >>19377719 >>19378394>>19379416 >>19380096 >>19380665 How f------ poor are you? >pic related, the same car as my shitmobile Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)01:23:27 No. 19374930193771531937725619377332 >>19377421 >>19379244>>19380709 I have a 1998 Dodge Caravan that I paid $200 for. Smog check and all. It ranks an easy 8/10 on the hooptie scale and constantly attracts cops. There is no ac, the ignition key is different from the door key, it didn't have an oil change for over 16000 miles before I bought it and the odometer glitches out losing miles randomly. Also the horn broke so I bought a handheld airhorn. Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)12:30:09 No. 1937715319377283 >>19378278 >>19374930 >Also the horn broke so I bought a handheld airhorn F------ Imao. Imagine this. >> Anonymous 07/02/18(Mon)03:26:19 No. 19369514>>19380719 >>19380870 File: 1526761364722.jpg (54 KB, 793x786) Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)12:48:18 No. 1937725 >>19378278 >>19374930 >handheld airhorn Thanks man, I needed a good chuckle today Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue) 12:53:39 No. 19377283 ► >>19377153 please tell me when using it you don't just blast it but instead do the "frr frr frcccccccccer™ Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)16:27:34 No. 19378278 >>19378339>>19378366 >>19379222 >>19380026 >>19380709 File: 20180703_162317.jpg (934 KB, 2560x1536) Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue) 16:29:28 No. 19378287 >>19378339 File: 20180703_162356.jpg (861 KB, 2560x1536) >handheld airhorn >>19377256 >>19377153 >>19377256 I'm serious. I've used it in anger too. Only problem is having to manually roll the window down first. Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue) 16:42:55 No. 19378339 >>19378278 >>19378287 Godspeed you crazy bastard SANDWICH ANARCHY COD Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)16:49:15 No.19378366 19378437 >>19378278 >pijamas >dirty ass carpet >dirty ass dashboard >bottle caps >radio with no cover 402005 And a picture of the copmagnet 2000 from outside. Also known as "Big D". >lots of coins >weird carpet thing over the dash in the passenger's side >weird part thing in the passenger's footwell >super start power pack >Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)19:57:13 No. 19379222 ► File: 1528188652155.jpg (13 KB, 286x168) RADICAL >>19367583 (OP) I ride a bicycle. manually roll the window down first. >>19378278 Dis n---- so f----- up it went full circle and he got errything figured out. Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)20:11:59 No. 19379291 ► Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)13:05:54 No. 19377332 ► >>19379244 I have actually done that. Only when rolling with the window down though. >>19374930 Somebody should visualize this Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)13:23:59 No. 19377421 File: 1530389809908.jpg (283 KB, 900x885) I've used it in anger too. >>19374930 I love you man Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)20:02:18 No. 19379244>>19379291 >>19374930 >handheld airhorn my sides are in orbit m. Imagine cutting this dude off and he sticks his arm out the window and blows a handheld airhom at you FRO used it in anger Only when rolling with the window down though. Fr Frr FRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRR! Anonymous 07/03/18(Tue)23:04:05 No. 19380026 ► >>19378278 > The memes are real. I... need a screencap of this. Anyone? Anonymous 07/04/18 (Wed)01:11:10 No. 19380439 19380557 >>19374869 >driving american Anonymous 07/04/18(Wed)02:01:47 No. 19380557► >>19380439 Hey the f----- with the Caravan and airhorn is doing it right.

Pin

anon likes his bed | /r/Greentext

Pin

Anon explains about something | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Limit to Wealth/Power 61 KB JPG 04/16/23(Sun)15:03:51 No.72972559 From my thirteen years of experience in conspiracy theory and fact there was something that always interested me the most. When a man or woman reaches the peak of wealth and or power they are free to do whatever they wish and break all laws. This leads them to engage in p---------, cannibalism, vampirism, b----------, murder, r--- and much more. After they indulge in all their lusts and curiosities, a good portion of them become stagnant and get bored. They already believe they "are like gods" but they know they are truly mortal and wish to extend their life. That's for those that get bored of hedonism and sadism. The rest of them become addicted to their vices. Having a hole in their chest that can only be filled with continually engaging in their depraved and unhealthy practices and fetishes. In both cases the extremely rich and powerful is reminded that they are still human beings and that their hole can't be filled with money or hedonism. Because once you are at the level of a "God" life seems boring, repetitive and predictable. You've "done it all" and you will always try to look for new things to do because you've done more than 99% of human beings who have ever lived. Such people are probably a different species at that point.

Pin

anon likes lesbian girls | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/01/23(Mon)19:35:53 No.898529367 >>898529495 Borderline lesbian girls are kinda fun, in that they actually think a lot like men. >be me >college >dating 9/10 suzy-girl-next-door blonde with blue eyes >part jewish girl 7/10 but with great t--- starts paying attention to me in classes >one thing leads to another and I find a way to meet part jewish girl on the side >part jewish girl sucks c--- like a hoover vacuum, and wants it in all holes all the time 11/10 sex >suzy-next-door wants missionary and will only suck c--- a little bit, but don't-you-dare-c-- >eventually, I'm addicted to part jewish girls mouth and superior sucking skills >byesuzy.org >part jewish girl one night introduces me to her roomie, also a 7/10, but blonde with a short haircut that looks kinda l---- >we go into part jewish girls room and begin to make out and she starts sucking me off >in walks l---- haircut girl >can she join us, anon? >ngl, i'm weirded out a little bit, but what the heck, I got a boner so that settles the argument >l---- haircut girl starts working on part jewish girl >i get bold once her clothes are off and start touching t----, she looks at me but doesn't stop me >get even bolder then, and redirect her head to my c--- >"I've never done this before" l---- haircut girl sez >boner powerup +40 >part jewish girl begins to give her lessons >eventually they're eating each other out while I'm taking turns f------ them >line them both up side-by-side asses aligned like I saw in a p---- once and pump and dump into both of them doggy >this relationship lasted for about a semester before Summer vacation >even got l---- girl to let me bang her alone once, but she had very low enthusiasm, though she did become a 8/10 cocksucker herself Toward the end of Summer, part jewish girl tells me over text that she is now full l---- and we won't have any repeats in the coming year. She transferred to a new school UCSF, naturally, and that was the end of that. My one fling with greatness, which hasn't been repeated since.

Pin

anon has a different take on sex | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/01/23(Mon)19:25:29 No.898528969 File: E-J-Brandy-VS-175-l 1.png (129 KB, 1000x1000) 1 E P >>898524298 (OP). She admitted she was -435 and 5'2", no regrets but I have a very different take on sex in general > be in the Marine Corps >platoons chubby chaser was talking s--- about how no one could top him >that very weekend I'm out with my boy and his girl says we all go out or they all stay in and she bringing her "cousin" >"cousin" in mexican is any other mexican essentially >THAR SHE BLOWS!!! I knew instantly she was at least 350-385 its my first time I'm this close to one as I'm a weight bigot >I just avoid gross people in general same goes for druggies or bad hygiene listen to less post Malone because of it >in the Marine Corps drinking is the game anyway and this is a great opportunity to take the platoon heavyweight belt >I was drunk 8-9 liquor drinks in the first 90 min >asses self yeah I'm drunk enough >not drunk enough the odor when she took of her pants was like a wall of BO w/ a hint of dead fish and a splash of margarita mixer >excuse myself for a glass of water and proceeded to drink half a bottle of pic related cause thats what was left >go back in first time I've ever tried thinking of someone/something I'm not doing >finish somehow after thinking of high-school crush >immediately get in shower >even have my boy to verify with platoon chubby chaser > I don't regret it but I'd rather f--- a clean animal over a dirty person though I have yet to f--- an animal I do ok for myself

Pin

Anon isn't ok | /r/Greentext

Pin

0

Greentext Stories - Anon gets bit | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

African village terrorised by gay baboon who recently r---- 5 men DOOGBE >be me >finally muster up the courage to ask my crush out on a date 57 KB JPG >decide to take her to a fancy restaurant to impress her >we're having a great time until suddenly we hear a loud noise from above >a raccoon drops down from the ceiling, hissing and foaming at the mouth >people are screaming and running in every direction, but my date and I freeze in fear >the raccoon charges at us and I try to defend her, but it's no use >it bites me on the arm and I feel an involuntary bowel movement >my date is horrified and starts to panic >we manage to escape to the bathroom, but it's too late for me >I sit there in embarrassment, I hear a commotion outside >turns out the police have been called and are in a standoff with the raccoon >more involuntary bowel movements >I'm still stuck in the bathroom, wondering how I'm going to explain the mess >eventually, the police manage to catch the raccoon and it's all over but the damage has been done >the cops manage to catch the raccoon, but not before it bites a few people >they also notice the mess in the bathroom and accuse me of public indecency >I try to explain the situation, but they don't believe me >my date is traumatized and I'm humiliated >I try to apologize and explain, but she's having none of it >she leaves the restaurant in a hurry and I'm left sitting there, feeling like a complete idiot lesson learned, always be prepared for unexpected situations and never underestimate the power of a wild animal.

View Gallery Random Image

Image Details

325 views (8 from today)

Uploaded May 01, 2023 at 09:23PM EDT

Origin Entry

Greentext Stories

Source

Tags

Claim Authorship Edit History

About the Uploader

Reddit Moments

Treasurer & Media Maid

Textile Embed

!https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/581/038/e48.jpg!

Today's Top Image Galleries

Queen Never Cry meme.

Queen Never Cry

Wifejak meme format depicting a female wojak character with red hair and a grey shirt.

Wifejak

The Social Contract

The Social Contract

My New Character meme.

My New Character / Chill Guy