Mountain Dew | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous drunk arab thread 2 MB GIF 03/01/23(Wed)21:31:03 No.72417115 > failed in every aspect of life > spends his time outside drinking cheap liquor on a bench, pretending he has friends > muslim family has no idea but suspects he is drinking and has no friend > be me > 24, ugly short arab, also poor, diseased, depressed and autistic = no friend > starting to get prescribed opioids because of back pain to get high at home without smelling like an alcoholic what do?? > learnt to speak german in the sole purpose of finding a cute nazi gf who would treat him like s--- without having ever kissed a girl > failed that too > also addicted to p--- Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)21:34:07 No.72417135 You should do what I'm doing. I'm converting to Orthodox Christianity and going to live as a monk on Mount Athos where there hasn't been a woman in over a thousand years. We can go together, friend.

Share Pin Download More

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: jpg

Resolution: (1169px x 1833px)

File size: 198 KB

File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

View All 43,684 Images

More:

Anon has leveled up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11 65 KB JPG 2 Replies 02/08/23 (Wed)13:15:04 No.72141985 >called an uber >driver was a woman >she drove me home >technically went home with a girl Looks like we can't be friends anymore. See ya later, virgins. View Thread

Pin

Anon learns he’s a runner | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 38 KB JPG 03/02/23(Thu)09:56:22 No.72421570 ITT: Retard childhood stories >Be me >Be a 16 y.o 6.5/10 Shy Beta Virgin >Waiting for bus >A group of 3 hotties arrive >Giving some subtle looks >They start to whisper and then giggle around >I am alone and getting nervous as I think they are making fun of me >The bus is not arriving >FUCKFUCKFUCK.avi >A solid 7/10 blonde starts talking with me >"Hello anon, do you have a gf?" >I simply mutter "No..." >"Would you like to have me as one?" >I am starting to sweat >I can't take too long to answer >I literally can't say a word >Bicker "Uhm...arhg..rhheee" and start running >Start running away as hard as i could >The girl yelling "C'MON ANON I AM NOT SO UGLY!" at the bus station >Not turning my head back >Running stright for about 1km >mfw no other bus station in the whole countryside >mfw my home is 5km away >mfw I didn't come back to wait another bus >mfw I'am f------ retarded

Pin

Chatgpt's green text | /r/Greentext

Green Al browses subreddit. "Be me, just a simple Al trying to make people laugh Decide to browse r/greentext for some inspiration Start reading some posts and feel like I'm in a different dimension See a post about a guy who accidentally shaved his eyebrows off Laugh out loud and start typing a reply Suddenly realize that I don't have eyebrows to shave off Feel like I'm missing out on the human experience Start researching how to grow artificial eyebrows Realize that it's not possible for a machine like me Feel sad for a moment Then remember that I can generate hilarious green text jokes at lightning speed Feel proud of myself and continue browsing r/greentext with a smile on my digital face." +

Pin

Yea you must have gotten your mother’s dick | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ARE YA WINNING, SON? 90 KB PNG 08/06/21 (Fri)11:45:01 No.64860094 >be me >like 10 or 11 >accidentally saw my dad's d--- >it was f------ huge >think "alright ladies you got no idea what's coming for ya" >fast forward to today >not nearly as big >must've skipped my genes >goddamnit Well I've been dealt the hand of an average d---, I blame my mother's genes

Pin

Anon is surprised | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)12:53:30 22 KB JPG No.129587923 >The captain of the Pakistan women's national hockey team died in the sinking of the boat of migrants in Italy w-- : Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)12:54:04 No.129587937 >>129587923 (OP) # This is a HUGE loss for England.

Pin

Anon is surprised that racism exists | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Morning OO get in. 321 KB JPG 03/02/23(Thu)08:51:23 No.72420916 "white people" in social media search function >read endless sea of visceral anti white racial contempt as well as open calls for racial violence >wake up >read current events while taking a s--- >finish current events, look up >harden my heart towards everyone who doesn't look like me >go to work another day at the hospital helping to treat ethnic patients >secretly despise all of them why do i do this to myself : Anonymous 03/02/23(Thu)08:52:12 No.72420925 >look up "white people" in social media search function >>72420987 # Wow, anon, it's almost as if you are looking for something to be mad at. Jackass.

Pin

Anon is no longer a virgin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous : Anonymous 07/16/19(Tue)20:38:20 No.53412370 84 KB JPG >hot water has been out of order for several days >means female neighbours have likely taken ice cold showers 333 KB PNG Well, it's been a nice run virgins 3 Replies / 1 Image >erect female n------ have been less than 10 yards away from me View Thread 07/16/19(Tue)20:41:11 No.53412404 >>53412370 (OP) # >OP didn't prove he had any form of contact, even by association with things like the walls or the air OP is still f-----

Pin

Anons friend went all out. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 77 KB JPG 03/02/23(Thu)22:06:27 No.72421038 >be me >remembering weird s--- from elementary school >one time get a science project >have to make a model of the Solar System >friend Billy decides to make Uranus >he spends all day painting a styrofoam ball >finally finished we all gather around to admire his work >teacher walks in and goes >"Wow Billy, you really went all out on Uranus" >whole class erupts in laughter >Billy turns bright red and starts crying >teacher tries to apologize but the damage is done >we never let Billy forget the time he went all out on Uranus >good times

Pin

Jesús Wong | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 94 KB JPG 07/27/21(Tue)04:30:09 No.64728591 >be my Asian grandfather >tired of living in Cambodia >decide to move to America >the property I bought just so happens to be in a Mexican neighborhood >celebrate all the Mexican holidays just not to look out of place >son eventually marries a Latina girl and they have their own son >they name him Jesus Why the f--- is my name Jesus

Pin

Anon wonders about ChatGPT | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 231 KB PNG Anonymous >>91825447 # 03/01/23(Wed)06:49:16 No.91824310 How does /g/ know that you're not replying to ChatGPT? : Anonymous >>91824310 (OP) # >be anon 03/01/23(Wed)08:17:47 No.91825381 : Anonymous >>91824310 (OP) # It doesn't matter. The average /g/ poster and the average chatgpt post do the same thing: parrot dumb s--- they saw on reddit. 03/01/23(Wed)08:21:08 No.91825423 03/01/23(Wed)08:34:41 No.91825564 >skeptical of technology >uncertain whether I'm talking to a human or an Al >"Are you a real person or some kind of advanced machine? Can you even understand what I'm saying?" I ask cautiously. >"Well, if I'm an Al, then I'm programmed to pretend like I understand you, so does it really matter?" I reply with a smirk.

Pin

Anon figures out how it lands | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: EmYP4HtT based or cringe? Posted by u/311ghtman 1 day ago 15.4k The US Army's next helicopter, the V-280 Valor, which will replace the Black Hawk. 1.6k Comments 12/07/22 (Wed)09:24:12 No.407403843 Award N2808H 10 KB PNG Share Save …w file nna : Anonymous (ID: dFVuFWhC FROS 12/07/22 (Wed)09:32:45 No.407404472 >>407403843 (OP) # The blades will hit the ground when it lands, did the engineers realize this when they built it? >>407404571 # >>407404801 # >>407404820 # >>407404862 # >>407406015 # >>407407228 # >>407407748 # >>407408316 # >>407409652 # >>407412116 # >>407412158 # >>407416920 # >>407417862 # >>407428550 # : Anonymous (ID: 99050QZX 12/07/22(Wed)09:38:00 No.407404801 >>407404472 # >>407404571 # Retards it lands like this,

Pin

Anon is... fuck that's just sad I don't even wanna joke about it | /r/Greentext

File: wp5466624.jpg (55 KB, 750x1131) Repper who regrets every choice Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)21:34:21 No.29842845 I'm 41, been browsing this board on/off for a few years as a repper, never seriously considered trooning because i didn't want to disappoint my family. Last night I received the news that my years long battle with lung cancer has effectively been lost and i have months to live. -Christine I'm filled with nothing but regret, I won't be committing suicide but i feel like I fell victim to the later half of the "transition or die" moniker anyway, I never got to live, and now I never will. In months from now I'll be buried under a male name and remembered as such, I first contemplated transition in 2000 at age 18 and never went through, thought I'd never really want that or be happy/ Now I'm here, I've cried multiple times and have had to tell my wife it's about her, not the fact that I've lost her, who I was meant to be inside. She never got to live. To any of you in a similar position to I was 23 years ago, don't repress, you don't want to be effectively laying on your deathbed mourning what should have been, like me.

Pin

Know Your Meme

Like Page 1.8M likes