Anon has s----- parents | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1C5A1067-4ABC-42FC-94F8-7D5B25E4 (...) Anonymous Thu 05 Mar 2020 17 >tfw one chance at life >parents name me Pubert

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Hot take, Hitler was mediocre at best | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 90 KB JPG 02/22/23(Wed)18:24:42 No.894802446 >claims to be master race >gets s--- kicked in by a few snowflake commies What was so great about this guy again?

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Anon takes a shit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 32 KB JPG 02/23/23(Thu)14:59:45 No.894861702 >have to take a s--- >it's gigantic >struggle for 5 minutes on the toilet >finally push it out after a great struggle >almost c-- >i'm rock hard for an hour after this event what did my body mean by this

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anon is trauma cucked | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 98 KB PNG 02/23/23(Thu)10:54:56 No.72338782 >meet new people >make small talk whenever I meet them at uni and stuff >notice they don't really like me >I can see they're thinking "oh no not this f----- again" >start ignoring them >they ignore me back >can't ever talk to them again >don't ever want to talk to them again >especially notice that women are scared shitless of me >talking to people in general is mostly pain >having been bullied in high school, I always expect people to be cruel and to dislike me I have been thinking lately that I am kinda trauma cucked. My friends (the people I don't ignore) often point out my funny mannerisms and stuff. Do any of you guys relate? Do you have that thing where you just can't get along with people? For context, I am fairly normalfag tier looking

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Anon is happy | /r/Greentext

>one day I came up to her after class and referred to some joke she made in class >she thought i was making fun of her and started trying to apologize for the joke >i told her it was hilarious >we had lunch >long story short, she didn't have any friends and she wanted friends, and I wanted to be her friend >and we were fast friends > by the end of senior year, Nicole and I are dating >i called my dad to tell him y cam >i was devastated about everything >two days later, I got a phone call >we lost our virginity to each other >we went to college in the same city >as college moved on, our relationship just kept getting stronger >we got an apartment together >we talked about post-college plans >it became apparent that as things were going, we might get married > and it was amazing >Nicole started to >skip as >got and >one day >Nicole had breast cancer Past cancer >they took her into the hospital, and in some f------ awful twist of events, in addition to breast cancer, she had brain cancer >the doctor said that since they found out early enough, they might be able to do some help, but it was a dangerous situation >each day we spent together felt so important >we were inseparable she found a lump in her breast to get sick >Nicole starts contemplating suicide as she starts rapidly losing weight and hair >l stick by her side throughout the whole ordeal as many classes as I can >call Anonymous (ID: Xa080p0c) 01/19/13(Sat)23:50:04 No.452312165 So it's Saturday evening and you're on /b/ (unless you're in a time zone where that isn't the case). You probably have a lot of anger and sadness towards the world. Maybe this story will validate your anger and sadness, maybe it'll make you feel like you shouldn't be as angry and sad, all I know is that it's the story of the worst thing that's ever happened to me. It starts about five years ago >my step mother is a c--- >like >she's a sa christian scientist and an awful woman who's borderline abusive and hates everyone in the family >she justifies her being a c--- with "you kids think i'm the evil stepmother anyways, so i might as well be" >I used to feel bad for hating her, because I just wanted my dad to be happy >I do not feel this way any longer >about five years ago, I was a senior in high school >a new girl moved in, her name was Nicole another job to help pay for the hospital bills c--- a huge c--- >realize that I'm running out of potential time to ask her to marry me >decide that i should ask her to so that she can have that before it's too late 1905 all my dad >Nicole was a misfit from the start, she was socially inept, dressed weird, and kept to herself >whenever she tried to reach out and make friends she just seemed mean or scary >I knew straight off the bat that we'd get along perfectly >let him know my intentions, and let him know that if he wants to come he's welcome, but that my step mother is not >says he understands >the next day, Nicole and I come home from the hospital and who is waiting outside our building but my goddamn step mother > "Robert, I think we need to talk about what you told your father." >"No. We do not. been withdrawn > "Robert, you cannot marry Nicole, for one thing she's going to die, and for another thing, she's choosing medicine over prayer which is against our family's religion." >my whole body goes cold with rage >I had not proposed to Nicole yet. >it has been sl > was going to surprise her >she found out by hearing my stepmother say i was forbidden from it and that Nicole was going to die >without thinking I punched my stepmother in the face and she fell to the ground >i walked Nicole into our building without looking back >continue helping Nicole >one day the hospital says they're having trouble with my card! >insufficient funds W bank account is empty >that's impossible, there's thousands of dollars on this account abeak >go check on laptop >he tells me oh jesus f------ christ >my father set the account up with me when i was going into college, he set up my original account when i was a sophomore in high school alime that he had >i realize that he had the authority to do this >i am furious and call my father >let him know that I am coming for the money and if I don't get it, i will call the cops and report theft that the has the rights to call the police and report my assault on my stepmother >tell him i'm coming over and we can discuss in person edit him for four >i yelled at him for four hours and got my money back >went to the bank the next day to set up a new account that he had nothing to do with >take care of hospital bills >now that the whole marriage thing is out in the open, i discuss it with Nicole >she really wants to get married before she dies >it's becoming more and more probable that she will not make it very long Ant >get an engagement ring >take her out to this old field we used to hang out in during high school where we had all sorts of memories, it was this huge foresty area under the stars off the main road >engaged >holding her after that was the most beautiful moment of my life had. >i had cut off all contact with my father and stepmother >everything seemed to be going alright >Nicole started acting much happier she said how important it was to her that now, if she was going to die, she'd be dying happy and she'd be dying with me >it hurt me so much have to think about it, but knowing she was accepting this horrible inevitable outcome was good >We have a low-key wedding with only friends and Nicole's family, and everyone tells me how great it is that I'm doing this for her en >explain that I'm not doing it for her because of the cancer, that i just wasn't letting it get in the way of what i always wanted to do anyway >Nicole is happier than ever seen her ever see >it was easily the best day of my life >about two weeks into our marriage Nicole's health starts getting worse and worse the hospital f far more frequently >we start going to the >the doctor estimates she has about a month to live >hearing >up until until that point, there was no set-in-stone sort of outcome those words was one of the most horrifying moments of my life >there was always an admittedly distant hope of things turning out okay >my hopes were crushed > dropped my courses for the semester and set it up so that i'd finish in the fall of the next year >i >I spend every day with Nicole >we are so in love that it physically hurts to think about her dying vim inil >I'm put in jail over night >she'd been holding up fine, but now she was starting to get afraid >"you need to be with me when i die, i don't want to be alone when i die" >she keeps making me promise i'll be there >three weeks after she gets the "one month" warning >we're in our apartment together just holding each other and listening to music >there's a a knock on the door to on > go to answer >it is the police >i am being arrested for assaulting my stepmother >Nicole 15 >as i get t taken away. Nicole is just screaming "Don't leave me!" >the next day I'm let out as my father and step mother dropped the charges is on the floor >she is in the fetal position >my dad picks me up to say that he hopes i learnt a lesson >tell him i need to go home >he drives me to his and step mom's house for me to apologize >he keeps me there for two hours because my stepmother doesn't believe i'm sorry when i say so (i am clearly not sorry) >my car and cell phone are at the apartment >the room smells awful >she is dead >eventually he says "this isn't over" and takes me home >I knock on the door >no answer >oh s--- no no no no no >find the spare key >come in >her face is caked in tears >she had texted me "come home" about thirty times, my phone was off and in the other room This happened last year. I've been contemplating suicide ever since. I haven't spoken to my father since this. The reason it just came up is because last week he called and said he got diagnosed with prostate cancer and had two months to live and wanted to patch things up before it's too late. I'm having a lot of trouble figuring out whether or not to, but he never accepted any guilt, nor did my stepmother, and they're still married, so I'm pretty much planning on letting him die knowing I want nothing to do with him.

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anon doesn't like Shakespeare | /r/Greentext

File: 324038047204724027409342.png (403 KB, 2400x1350) Happy Highschool Stories Anonymous 02/24/23(Fr >be me >few years ago >had f----- English teacher >she assigned Shakespeare books and s--- >assigned us Romeo and Juliet >never read it >would just use internet summaries >we had a Romeo and Juliet quiz >oh s--- oh f--- >I didn't read more than 2 pages of this book >manage to answer the first few questions based on the summaries I found on the internet >used Eeny Meeny Miny Moe for practically every other question >got the highest score among my friends at 89%

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Anon gets rejected. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/16/23(Thu)12:30:29 No.28417171 ► >be me > i asked this girl from my physics course out. asked to do some coursework with me. >she said she had to do a extra shift on Wednesday like 3mins from when we are meant to meet. >I had gotten all ready and was at library for no reason. >she asked if we could do it after class on Thursday >agreed >be today, she said she was too sick, the deadline is tomorrow. >its fine i did it on Wednesday. >I asked if she wanted to go to the aviary with me. >idk im a retard i like birds. >She said she is really ill, and asked if i could do it next week. F--- it is over? i just left her on read. like why do i have to be so ugly. like i just wanted to get to know a smart Spanish girl. Was it something i said?

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Anon is a hack fraud | /r/Greentext

Anonymous vii >>87744906 # >that's right jay 02/15/23(Wed)15:27:05 No.87745692 5wx4x8mbnuha1.jpg 130 KB JPG

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Anon is on a streak | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous nofap 465 KB PNG how far are you in your nofap jounrey? >t. day 11 im fighting it hard rn 78 Replies / 14 Images 02/23/23(Thu)09:55:07 No.70058329 : Anonymous >>70058329 (OP) # About 6 hours View Thread 02/23/23(Thu)21:16:51 No.70063628

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anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

> Be in 200 level uni class > Stupid professor assigns a 2 person project > Get stuck with the laziest most self-righteous pick-me girl in the class > She does no work. Ghosts me. Actually tells me she "Does not care about the grade on this." > I even go to the retard professor and get told "tough luck" > I do all the work, pull a 99% on the project. > Pick me doesn't even say a word to me after > Time for a little trolling >I download all of the photos from her insta > Make a few fake profiles and start messaging guys from our school > Start to solicit them, offering nudes or to meet up for "some fun" in exchange for crypto. > Make some good money doing this. Once the guy bites I ghost him and move on > Do this until I find the right catch > One guy absolutely losses his s--- > Bingo > Taunt him, ask him what he's gonna do about it, and block him. > Have probably 5 or guys absolutely livid at her for scamming them for crypto with the promise of boob or sex > Notice towards the end of the semester Pick-me stops showing up to class > Don't see her on campus at all > Do some digging, turns out she left her dorm and is back at home with her parents too > Make a fake email pretending to be a professor for a made-up class and email her parent asking what happened as she just dropped off the face of the earth. > Her mom reveals that some guy started stalking and harassing her for weeks > Guy turned up to her dorm room and tried to force his way in threatening to r--- her >She got so scared she ran home after that > Later on the rumors of her crypto scamming got spread around > Last I heard she transferred to a different uni Do you care now bitch?

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Anon's sister has an OnlyFans | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/22/23(Wed)18:43:22 No.894817316 ► >>894817809 >>894817850 >>894817905 >>894817979 >>894818940 >>894818942 >idea2.png >tell her her mom looks cute sewing >tell her to be careful while she sleeps >bitch blocks me >be me >have a degenerate sister >stalk her twitter sometimes and found she has an onlyfans >want to show her the dangers of showing her body on the internet >idea.jpg >subscribe to her onlyfans with a fake name >earn her thrust and also troll her by paying for specific videos like toe spreading, shoving her brother's (me) controller up her vag, sucking her t--- etc etc >troll her by asking her to record a video with her brother (know she would never do that) >unsurprisingly she rejects my request >tell her that I know where she lives and if she doesn't deliver she'll suffer the consequences >sis thinks it's just a bluff >write our adress to scare her >mom is sewing on the couch next to our big window >be dinner time >she looks really anxious and isnt talking much Hope she learns her f------ lesson Anonymous 02/22/23(Wed)18:54:05 No.894817809 >>894817316 (OP) >contact her with a burner phone >keep terrorizing her until she makes a vid with her brother (you) >she finally gives in >you f--- your sister "just to help her get rid of this creep" >she falls in love with you and becomes your personal f------ >??? >profit

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Anon puts the year anniversary of Russia's invasion in perspective | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: RZ6ymtRs) 02/22/23(Wed)18:31:27 No.417195736 >>417196056 >>417196142 >>417196262 >>417196289 >>41719 File: IMG_0567.png (1.04 MB, 936x706) In an alternate universe: >Day 365 of US Invasion of Mexico >US has still not declared war >Mexico City still stands >1st and 3rd Armored Division ran out of fuel, destroyed by cholos with RPG's >Footage of Mexican farmers carting off dozens of Abrams tanks >US has still not achieved air superiority, the mythical pilot "Burro de Tijuana" has shot down 7 F-35's >101st Airborne has taken 80%+ losses in a failed paradrop on Mexico City Airport >The US' largest aircraft carrier, USS Gerald Ford, sits at the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico >Over 70% of the initial force has been KIA >US has been forced to retreat from Tijuana and Monterrey after Mexican counter-offensive (Distance from border: <20KM) >Mexico has reversed 50% of the initial gains >Draft has been enacted; over 3 million Americans have fled to Canada >Army now primarily consists of conscripted West Virginian hillbillies and South Chicago hoodrats >US-backed 'breakaway' region of Chihuahua forces men to fight with Springfield rifles >Troops have used the XK and symbol on their vehicles, called the 'New Swastika' by the world >China provides Mexico over $100B in military aid, none of which is intercepted >UK publicly supports Mexico, Canada and the Germany join CSTO >US Cruise Missile attacks have failed to cut off electricity >Mexican special forces destroy the Golden Gate Bridge >Los Angeles shelled with impunity >Stinger batteries installed on the roof of the White House >Former comedian President of Mexico Carlos Mencia named Person of the Year, 95% Approval Rating >POTUS has not seen in public for 6 months, rumored to be hiding in Area 51 >Guy Fieri, CEO of Blackwater, announces his brigade of Alcatraz convicts has captured the village of Empalme (Pop: 472) >US President gives speech on invasion anniversary >Blames war on 'Collective South's' use of witchcraft, Latina sexual looseness >"Under my administration over 200,000 new jobs have been created" >Mark Milley visibly falls asleep >End of speech

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Nutty Proffessor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/23(Wed) 22:29:11 No.72335339 >water fast for a week to burn body fat >Last day of fast I come home starving, nothing to eat. >Eat 1.36 Kilograms of roasted and salted pistachios from Costco in about 40 minutes. >Headache setting in, mouth is dry no matter how much, leg is numb, stomach feels heavy. 53 KB JPG Did I commit a mistake? I am gonna end in a chubbyemu video? : Anonymous 02/22/23(Wed) 22:34:33 No.72335379 I'm not a nutritionist but eating nearly 3lbs of salted anything during a week long water fast seems pretty retarded

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