Anon is gay | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: onymous 12/25/22(Sun)09:20:44 No.891363335 1.59 MB JPG ITT First or best gay experience >Be me horny the 15yo teen on Omegle >Realize the only people chatting are old men, so I pretend to be a girl and get into lots of convos. >After months of this I love being degraded by older men >Make my way to Craigslist and post ads looking for older guys >chat with one who is down to meet even tho >I'm underaged. Tell him I'm about to turn 17. >day of, nervous as hell >walk over to a near strip mall where he picks me up >shows up in an old jaguar and asks me to hop in >awkward 10 minute drive to his apartment. >in this sketchy elevator to his floor I'm thinking I'm going to be murdered >go until his house anyway >he undress me and sucks me off, completely soft nervous as all hell >asks me to lay on my back while he eats me out >stuffs it in >oh f--- oh f--- that hurts >he keeps f------ me till I precum everywhere >c--- in me and I hope it's done. >bends me over doggy and starts f------ me again >I can't believe this 40yo guy just came in me for a second time >he lays down tired and asks me to get on top >we kiss for a minute then he strokes me >I precum so much I faked c------ so he would stop >gets dressed and drops me back off at the strip mall >spend the next 10 years flirting with men online and secretly bi trying to feel that way again

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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anon is nervous | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 146 KB JPG 05/10/22(Tue)09:00:38 No.68569308 Appreciation time. >be me >nervous driver >hate highways, always take back roads >driving at dusk, see car pulled to side of road >slow down to be careful >there are skid marks behind the car, looks to have hit a mailbox >car is empty, no one around >continue driving >see blond woman walking down road >slow down again to be careful >she notices me and stops walking >very pretty, looks my age >she gives me a thumbs up >feelsgoodman.exe >continue driving and make it home safe It's nice being appreciated. Here's a thumbs up to all of you.

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anon wants to become an artist | /r/Greentext

⠀ onymous A! NO TO AI GENERATED IMAGES 90 KB PNG sheet of paper 12/25/22(Sun)22:18:49 No.891378278 >be a teenager >want to become an artist instead of having a real job >become the shame of your family >rendered literally useless by Al >become mad at society because it doesn't want to pay for your particular way of applying paint strokes on a

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anon is in a open relationship | /r/Greentext

: onymous stion of GEH >had a few girlfriends before >currently in an open relationship >we exclusively only swap with couples >the dude of one couple wants to double penetrate his girl with me >obviously our d---- gonna touch >girls like the thought of seeing/feeling that and his girl is so excited, she wants us to do some d--- fencing before, to decide who goes first gettyes Breathi 12/26/22(Mon)02:48:59 No.891389557 24 KB JPG now i do believe most people would classify d---- touching in any way to be gay (i do as well). but is it really gay if my whole life i've f----- only girls, kissed only girls - just some d---- touching to double team a slut - instantly makes me gay? where is the logic in that? (i'm only asking here, as i otherwise would be in an echo chamber)

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Anon spends time with the family | /r/Greentext

12/25/22(Sun)14:48:52 No.71548480 >"Hey, look who finally crawled outta his little hidey-hole! C'mon down and have some Christmas grub, Champ! Don't be a stranger. Tell us what you've been up to. Have those video game coins finally paid off for you, bud? No worry. They'll seem like pennies when we get you a job and you get that first paycheck. But we'll work on that next week. Merry Christmas, Champ. Dig in." >swats your hand away from the alcoholic beverages >"But not those, Champ. I need you focused on a finding a job first." >audible laughter onymous 432 KB PNG

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Anon is thinking | /r/Greentext

haha yea im fine La 25EFF340-CED0-4C53-A9F7-965A32DAADCF.jpg 81 KB JPG doğum ar ne 56.5 How much a man has to be attractive on a scale 1-10/10 to be approached by women? > be me > 19 > never got gf > just wondering I mean approached at least 10x times in clubs or on the street or in the school and only for a sexual content.

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Anon gets a job | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Job Greentexts 225 KB PNG 10/23/17(Mon)23:27:58 No.40623659 This happened last night. >Get job at McDonalds, need cash >Work in the back arranging the meals >qt 3.14 comes in with~8 yo daughter, asks for a chicken nugget Happy Meal >daughter is really polite to casier, says please and everything >throw in an extra nugget because of her kindness >few mins later, manager tells me to mop a spill >its right next to the mom and her daughter >evesdrop on them >"Mommy look, the people in the back gave me an extra nugget, why?" >mom replies, "Its because they're dumb enough to work here that they cant count" >mfw >mom and daughter laugh while I walk away Why are people so unappreciative? 13 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anons mother is a chad | /r/Greentext

950A350D-BD1A-4D16-9315-B4048A341923.jpg 192 KB JPG >be playing dark souls 3 during lockdown >have sweet, gentle and caring mother that would never hurt anybody >she asks me to take down the Christmas lights from in front of our house >finish in a few minutes and go back to playing DS3 >she walks in and says I've made a mistake >tells me that I took down the Christmas lights from the roof instead of the fence like she asked me to(i had misheard her) >looks at me dead in the eye and says >'Idiot. You're an idiot. You're a f------ idiot to begin with. Only coward losers use dex/int builds. >tells me to gitgud before leaving

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You're meant to go to sleep at the end of a good day instead of going on 4chan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous When did you realize the inter(...) 198 KB PNG 08/10/21(Tue) 14:37:59 No.64917545 >be me, yesterday afternoon >spend my days off getting high alone in my apartment and browsing 4chins >Decide f--- it, I'll drop by my parents house and visit them >Dad is working on the car fixing the brake line >I help him out >we chat about the family drama and how everyone is doing >I say f--- it and drop by my grandparents house to say hello >Forgot it's my grandfather's bday and a bunch of my cousins are there >We decide to play cards and have a few beers >Chat about when we were kids and how much fun we used to have >Back to my apartment >Decide that my good day shouldn't end and text some people from work to see if they want to hang out at the local bar >2 of them show up at the bar >We have a good time, even made some new friends at the bar >Walk home feeling the happiest I've been in my adult life >Start browsing /r9k/ back at my apartment and feel an overwhelming sadness

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Anon doesn’t know what to do | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/25/21(Sun)00:34:06 No.64702696 >be me >get phone call from unknown number >ignores it >unknown caller leaves voicemail >voicemail says theres a gift at my door >checks front door thinking my friend is trolling me >opens the box at front door 302 KB JPG >has a plastic Jason mask with paint on it and a note that says "dont fail we are watching, kill them" >gets more voicemails telling me to go to certain addresses >doesn't go thinking its some re making a empty threat >gets brick thrown through my window with a note attached >note says "strike 1" should i do what they say?

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anon goes to a family christmas party | /r/Greentext

⠀ onymous st Christmas 97 KB JPG 12/25/22(Sun)19:40:15 No.891372813 >be me >23 >at Christmas party with my family >grandma asks my roastie cousin about her 15th bf in the last 2 weeks >turns over to me >ohfuck.jpeg >look over at her >asks if I finally got a gf >think about a good lie to explain why I've never had a qf at 23 >after staring for 4 seconds at her I shout >"I'm gay" >whole family looks at me >my dad starts crying and leaves the room >he mumbles "I always knew" >dad drives away and he hasn't been seen in hours This is the worst f------ Christmas ever.

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Anon has a queetion about statistics | /r/Greentext

T onymous 282 KB PNG 2 Replies / 1 Image : Anonymous >>71548199 # Anonymous 12/25/22(Sun)20:20:49 No.71548159 30 KB JPG merry christmas, robots. ever wondered what the suicide rate in this board is? merry christmas not a gay goes by that I don't want to blow my brain out 12/25/22(Sun)20:22:14 No.71548172 View Thread 12/25/22(Sun)20:24:48 No.71548199 >>71548172 # >gay hahaha f-----

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Anon has a fart fetish | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/20/18(Tue)21:55:51 No.43359586 Stupid things youn have done thread 2 Replies >consistently dutch-ovened myself for the past few years to prepare for eating ass >finally get a girl to sit on my face 46 KB JPG >she does not fart once Is this what all my Jedi training has paid off for? View Thread

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