Anonymous | 775720450 704.8 kB JPG 1 min ago >be me >dispatch manager for a small company >bunch of 18 year olds start working in the shipping dept >start using the most current memes, yet, ligma etc, just general s--- from 4chan/reddit to see if they get it >kids get really into it >everything is a meme to them >boss walks into the dispatch room just as I chuck some packing tape to one the kids screaming yeet as I do it >boss takes one look at me and says "looks like you've got a case of updog" >one of the kids replies "what's up dog?" >MFW my boss is the biggest memer in the office REPLY

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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/tv/ discusses black dwarves | /r/Greentext

prime video 1661467347622050.jpg 171 KB JPG THE LORD OF THE KINGS RINGS & POWER >OH LAAAAAAAWD DEM RANGZ, I FINNA GETZ ME SUM RANGZ NIGGUH They might as well have had Leslie Jones in this ffs 08/26/22(Fri)00:54:42 No.173161992 Anonymous >>173161946 (OP) # >Tfw LOTR had some kind a black genocide between this and the films >>173163175 # >>173163359 # >>173171452 # 08/26/22(Fri)00:55:52 No.173162039 : Anonymous >>173161946 (OP) # I don't understand. Why are there black dwarves? Don't they live deep underground? What do they need melanin for?

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Anon loves his sister | /r/Greentext

Anonymous In love with sister... Let me just go ahead and get it out at the start here: I am madly and hopelessly in love with my younger sister. No, none of this is a LARP and yes I do have enough sense and self-awareness to realize all the potential risks inherent to this situation. I don't know exactly how she feels, though I've seen enough signs to hold out hope for some sort of reciprocity, or at the very least, simple acceptance of my feelings. 399 KB PNG 08/26/22(Fri)04:24:15 No.27182776 Anyway, it all started about a year ago. We went on vacation to the beach with our mom. One evening, it was just me and her in her pretty dress, walking along the shore at sunset, and I'd never been so happy in my life. We never really spent too much time together before this. We'd sort of began to befriend each other in the months before and after, and our relationship (such as it was) grew quickly from there. She even started sleeping in my bed with me most nights (her idea). Our mom and others thought it was sort of weird at first, but it quickly passed because I genuinely had no other intentions at the time but to be friends with her and a better brother than I had been so far in her life. I feel I should note here that there's a pretty significant age difference between us: she's in her early 20's, and I'm in my mid 30's... But we've spent more time than not in each other's company for the better part of the last year. At this point I feel like I'm on the verge of collapse, I really don't know how much longer I can keep going like this. I've almost spilled my guts to her so many times. She's so beautiful to me, inside and out, and we're so alike. I can't imagine being with anyone else anymore, and every other "love" I've had in my life absolutely pales in comparison to her. It feels like I'm degrading her to even describe it with the same word, "love"... I'm almost terrified of her now, I don't know what to do, how to approach her, what to say, it's all spaghetti, I'm worrying her. Help me. Someone. Please. Tell me what I need to do here... 7 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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anon is short | /r/Greentext

File: 1395770628436.jpg-(7 KB, 228x221, sadfrog.jpg) GI Anonymous 03/25/14(Tue)14:03 UTC-4 No.25765216 [Reply] Re >tfw hate being 5'6" >tfw i have been rejected based solely on my height many times >tfw i wont ever really get aesthetic >even if i do, ill just seem like im compensating >stand in the middle of a cool room >close my eyes, breathe deeply >reach up to the ceiling >tfw height exercises aren't working >tfw depressed Showing all replies. Anonymous 03/25/14(Tue)14:09 UTC-4 No.25765321 Replies: >height exercises aren't working what are these "height exercises" bro Anonymous 03/25/14(Tue)14:13 UTC-4 No.25765370 Replies: >>25765402 >>25765405>>25765461 >>25765471>>2576 >>25766324>>25766343 >>25767312 >>25768084>>25768114>>25768178 >>25768211 >>25768247 >>25768273 >>25768294 >>257683 >>25768548 >>25768573 >>25768623 >>25768628 >>25768666->25768722 >>25768756>>25768781 >>25768813 >>25768848 >>2576888 >>25765321 well it depends theres different ones but I tried this meditation technique to change my body into a taller one >try to imagine a force making all my bones grow in length >try to feel myself floating and getting taller >whisper the words "grow, grow, grow" as i'm doing it

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anon has an epiphany | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG Anonymous 23 KB PNG 01/24/21(Sun)08:18:56 No.62001152 Anyone else probably gonna die a virgin because you refuse to settle for the fat/ugly easy girls? I'm just not even interested in anything less than a qt, or at least a chubby girl with sexy fat distribution and a decent face. 01/24/21 (Sun)08:21:17 No.62001180 >>62001152 (OP) # >applies reverse logic >realises women will never settle for him tfw

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society's double standards | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 288 KB PNG 08/26/22(Fri)15:08:27 No.69964327 >Drunk foid chooses to have sex with a man >She was drunk and not responsible for her choices, that chud must face consequences! >I get drunk and go behind the wheel >Le it was my choice, and I face the consequences of killing 3 people in a crash I am getting REAL f------ tired of these double standards. A man cant even go on a booze cruise without the full weight of the US legal system cramping his style.

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Anon’s in a sticky situation, what would you do? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 39 KB JPG >had sex on new year's night >condom broke 01/20/21 (Wed)20:17:27 No.845285789 >gf's ovulation day >her period is 5 days late >both still live with parents in college >gf says abortion is sin what do anons? 39 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Be 17 Bommer | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/03/18(Sat)10:45:10 No.43594296 >be 17 >bomber

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anon has a job at Subway | /r/Greentext

>be me >wagefag at subway >eatfresh.wav >really tiny guy comes in and is barely big enough to see over the counter >orders footlong meatball >loads of extras, loads of salad, loads of sauce >do my best to make a stable and sandwich but it takes me ages >absolute work of f------ art >monstersandwich.bmp >pays close to double the usual cost of most expensive sandwich due to all the extras >proceeds to eat less than 6" and looks to be packing up >dude legit takes over half my masterpiece and throws it in the bin >what the actual f---? PFEMM SUBWAY SUB DAY 68 KB JPG

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Anon has a plan to make women lactate | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/26/22(Fri)08:51:56 No.173161885 >>173161917 >>173161942 >>173161987 File: 9WA5t1x.jpg (143 KB, 984x734) >>173161005 >go to california >find out where she lives >find out her jogging routine >put ads out for a babysitter >find a family who trusts you >take baby out on stroller >hide phone in pram >play looping baby crying sounds from youtube in the pram >nobody can stop you legally from inducing lactation in women tell me why this wouldn't work

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Anon doesn’t realize the pussy makes noise w a condom sometime | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: qcqw+HFF) 167 KB JPG 07/09/20(Thu)23:57:38 No.267224774 >gf keep farting during sex >i tell her to stop >>267225105 # >stop what >stop farting >im not farting >keep f------ her >she keeps farting Anonymous (ID: 7/3bbaXz 07/10/20(Fri)00:00:08 No.267225026 Best thread on 4chan right now

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Anon doesn't like Mary Jane Watson. | /r/Greentext

File: Img_2022_08_25_12_36_33.jpg (330 KB, 864x839) Anonymous 08/25/22(Thu)18:44:00 No.610148652 >>610150379 >>610150518 >>610150882 >>610151104 >>610151124 >>610152519 >>610153117 >>610154169 >>610154561 >>610154806 >>610154972 >>610154980 >>610155063 >>610155085 >>610155131 >>610156901 >>610161869 >>610163275 >>610163567 >>610164567 >>610165703 >>610168165 >>610172660 >>610173313 >>610174007 >>610174070 >>610175341 >>610176823 >>610178220 >>610180857 >>610182073 >>610182226 >>610185126 >>610185375 >Is just a privileged malnourished vegan trust fund bitch from New York who lives in an ivory tower. >gets captured by terrorists dozens of times because she thinks life is like Scooby Doo >Tries to sneak in her designer boots and leather jacket >Her entire cause it to take pictures for a f------ newspaper >Needs to be saved moments from death by her boyfriend who is a superhero >"I NEVER ASKED YOU TO SAVE ME" >"I CAN HANDLE MYSELF YKNOW" >Like some frat girl picking fights for her bf she constantly grs herself in trouble so Spiderman can save her >Instead of supporting her crime fighting bf who actually makes a difference in the world, she just belittles him out of jealousy Why was emjay written so F------ retarded. She's so awful it's like an incel who hated women wrote this dogshit character

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Anon is mario | /r/Greentext

18 KB JPG Autism thread? I'll start >be me >see post about guy falcon punching his bully >mario is my favorite character in smash >hatch master plan >next day at school >bully comes up to me >"hey fatass! Give me your money" >pull hand sanitizer out if pocket >pull lighter out of other >put sanitizer on hand and light it >yell "ITS A ME, MARIO!" >punch him with the force of a thousand Worth it suns >his face gets lit on fire >we both ended up in the hospital with third degree burns

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Greentext Stories - anon likes memes | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous | 775720450 704.8 kB JPG 1 min ago >be me >dispatch manager for a small company >bunch of 18 year olds start working in the shipping dept >start using the most current memes, yet, ligma etc, just general s--- from 4chan/reddit to see if they get it >kids get really into it >everything is a meme to them >boss walks into the dispatch room just as I chuck some packing tape to one the kids screaming yeet as I do it >boss takes one look at me and says "looks like you've got a case of updog" >one of the kids replies "what's up dog?" >MFW my boss is the biggest memer in the office REPLY

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