Anon can't perform | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

173 KB JPG >be me, in bed with gf >she shows me pic rel on her phone >"you could never do this for me!" >w--? >I just asked her what she meant, but she kept >repeating herself >she sounded exasperated and started quietly >crying later on W-- was I supposed to do here guys?

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Didn't see that coming | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10 KB JPG 01/06/19(Sun)10:53:20 No.789251811 >be me >over the border racist >sleep with underage niece >hate the British for humiliating my country's people >cool mustache >spend a lot of time outside of said county >can give firebomb public speeches >write a book about how my people are oppressed >people favor me 4 Replies >rise to power >consider WW2 as the opening of opportunities >be Gandhi >pic unrelated View Thread

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Anon hates reddit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 159 KB PNG 07/16/22(Sat)02:01:38 No.69426059 >your account is too new! Post deleted! >you dont have enough karma! Post deleted >we think your post might be violating the rules based on a keyword! Post deleted! >your post has been queued for manual approval by the subreddit moderators >this thread has been locked, there has been enough discussion on this topic!

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Anon deadlifts a tree | /r/Greentext

Board /fit/ - Fitness : Anonymous Settings Mobile Home 07/04/22(Mon)23:00:29 No.67448853 >be me >out driving >fallen tree blocks road >get out of car and move it >probably not more than 150kg >hop into car and drive a few meters >go out again to put the tree back to make sure no dyels will get past >>67448883 # >>67449637 # >>67452678 # >>67452888 # >>67452899 >>67455462 # >>67461555 # >>67463162 # >>67463699 # >>67464816 # 67165701 #

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anon srsly needs some friends | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous akward stranger encounter thre(...) 09/12/21 (Sun)02:19:30 No.65345252 >be me >bored >stand on random streets on benches, stairs etc. >look at phone from time to time pretending im waiting for someone >i like it its fun 8 KB JPG >decide to spice it up >ask random strangers if theyre named [insert name i come up on the spot] >they all say no >fine until i see this 40 yo man >ask if he's named John Stan >he says yes >ohshit.png >i didnt expect that >"well uhh thats a nice name" >start walking away fast >hear a humble "...thanks" >dont look back

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anon is insecure | /r/Greentext

3h (8/20 6:30) 69879267 34 Re 5 Img JPG 138KB (1021 x 617) 7 Replies Posted by u/throwaway134552 9 years ago 822 Found out wife did things in her past that are off limits for me, can't help but be hurt. Obvious throw away. Found out recently through my wife's really chatty best friend a thing or two about my wife's past. Initially when we were dating she told me certain things were things she had never done before and didn't want to try. Turns out she did them with her exboyfriend. I talked to her about it, she told me she did them back then and enjoyed it. But doesn't want to do them with me. (a---/bdsm/threesome) And when I asked she didn't really give me any reasoning. She just said she didn't want to. I can't help but be hurt over this it has damaged my ego and self confidence. She knows I am hurt over this, but hasn't really given me an answer. So I am looking to you guys. Don't tell me divorce we have been together for 20 years, and she is the mother of my two children. I am not going to leave her over this. I am not saying that I feel entitled to those acts, but I do feel entitled to an explanation of why. >get married >wife is a bit of a prude >ok so she doesn't want to do certain things in bed, not the end of the world, right? >talk to a mutual friend >she accidentally reveals that your wife used to be a mega slut who's done all kinds of kinky s--- in the past >turns out she just doesn't want to do certain things in bed WITH YOU Absolutely brutal. How does one recover from this?

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anon does some minor tomfoolery, hijinks if you will | /r/Greentext

File: pepe toilet.png (341 KB, 860x1020) I s--- myself 08/19/22(Fri)21:11:27 No.884196040 >be me >lactose intolerant >basically only farts >go into work all is fine >boss says i gotta train the newbs >i myself have only been here a month >lunchtime.exe >get all the dairy products i can find for cheap >chug milk, yogurt, and eggs >go back to work, fart a f------ storm >keep farting all around the bosses office >f------ stinks so bad >he checks the toilets >i s--- in all of them and didnt flush >i even s--- in the sink >go home i hope i dont get fired anons, but dont tell me to do s--- that im probably not ready to do

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I really don't have the creativity for a good title. This is the most I can do: "Anon creepily stares at little girls while they have fun and feed animals without noticing the real animal that is near them" | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 216 KB PNG 07/20/22(Wed)23:49:10 No.882422033 nice lil story today >be me >alaskan >family of foxes live in my front yard. theyre pretty cute and they take care of the mice and squirrels so we let them live there >went gym but basically didnt leave house, kinda just played vidya >1030 pm >no food in fridge or freezer >ok ill go to taco bell >get food, drive home, feeling kind of empty >driving up towards my house >3 of the foxes are out on the side of the street >like 12 y/o girl and her mom by the road taking pictures of the foxes the look on the girls face was priceless. she had clearly never seen a fox before, especially this close up (they were like 20 ft away, our foxes are quite used to humans). just seeing how happy this random kid was made my whole week. happiness really is quite contagious. if that kid's reading this, i hope you got some good pictures.

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this guy thought it was called jojo's mundane adventures | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2 173 KB JPG 51 Replies : Anonymous 08/19/22(Fri) 20:46:20 No.241596902 >Protagonist defeats the villain by pulling a power up out of their ass at the last second : Anonymous >>241596902 (OP) # I Love It Has this EVER been done well? Jojo did it at least three times and it sucked worse and worse View Thread 08/20/22(Sat)00:07:56 No.241604767 08/20/22(Sat)00:13:36 No.241604935 >>241604493 # >the power of the arrow and how it can create or evolve stands to ridiculous levels WAS explained before, and it was thanks to the power of the arrow that GER was even born. What I'm only pointing out is the fact that GER is an instant win. That, in my opinion, is the asspull. And you're right, we knew that it would evolve Stands to a ridiculous level, but isn't this idea an asspull itself? >Diavolos fate was sealed the moment he lost the arrow, had Bucciarati not managed to destroy his sun and revert his bodyswitch, then he would have won, but they made clear that the one having the arrow would be the undisputed winner. Again, you're right. But what ultimately matters is the ridiculous power of the arrow. I'm repeating myself, but the "instant win" nature of GER, is the asspull. But, because it was built up, it makes this asspull more acceptable. I think Go Beyond is far worse, for example.

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Anon tavev nv bvll | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 312 KB JPG HIM 05/15/22(Sun)13:06:51 No.10248432 >BE ME, BVSED RVMAN BVLL >SVME JEVV CVMES VP TV MV VND STVRTS SAYING DVMB JEVV THVNGS LVKE "umm maybe having child sex slaves is bad man just sayin" >DRAVV MY GLADIVS VND SLVY >EVERYONV VLSE VT THV GRVCERY STVRE STVRTS FREVKING OVT >EXIT LVKE A BVSS AS THV JEVV BLEEDS OVT >JVST ANVTHER DVY VN THV LVFE VF A ROMVN BVLL

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Anon plays Halo | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I still dont believe it 08/16/22(Tue)10:18:03 No.69833380 91 7 KB JPG Greentext thread of unbelievable s---? Yeah. >Be me, 14 at the time, around 2013 >Playing Halo 2 Legendary trying for achievements with some buddies NOW, for anyone whos not a Halofag, Halo 2 Legendary makes dark souls look like Pokemon. Basically you die almost instantly if you dont know what your doing, some enemies can kill within 20 F------ FRAMES. >Be playing through Regret, very difficult due to envy skull resetting mission whenever I die >Like two steps from the end, took me like 5 hours >F------ cat s---- on the Xbox, and destroys it. >About a year later finally get money to buy a Used Xbox >MFW progress didnt save

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paint a picture in your mind | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 7/24/18 (Tue) >be me >12 years old >love greentext >mom wont let me go on 4chan >feelsbadman.jpg > computer has paint > Create my own greentext. > mom doesn't find out but I don't know where to post it Where does this go?

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Anon switches teams | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 92 viewers last 24 hrs Boost Me 34 KB JPG No.884200653 08/19/22(Fri)22:46:41 >can't get a date to save my life on tinder >this is the first 5 hours of having grinder I'm switching teams

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