Anon is a loyal friend | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon and his gym problems | /r/Greentext

>Doing deadlifts >Some f------ kid runs around my gym >Runs into my leg as I'm trying to lockout the lift 58 KB JPG >I drop the bar into the ground, loudly >Tell the kid to piss off >His mother shows up, angry as f--- >Tells me to stop lifting around the kids >Reply that she should keep the kids away from me >Next day >F------ kid is bothering me again when im doing chest >Slam the weights loudly right next to him >Kid cries, tells his mom that I'm scary >The mom flips out, gives me a huge rant about what a meathead I am >I yell back, she eventually starts crying and runs off with both her kids >She moves out, never see her or the little s---- again >Homegym masterrace

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Anon raises a future 4chan user | /r/Greentext

>with son (7) in the backyard today >see he's fiddling with something in the grass >"what are you doing carter?" >"playing with a frog!" >walk over >he's ripping all the limbs off what the f--- do I do about this 6 KB JPG

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anon doesn't like weed | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/27/22(Wed)08:43:56 vectorStock No.882778497 135 KB JPG What the f--- is the point of smoking this s---? thirsty >Laugh at s--- that isn't even funny >Too lazy to do anything that requires physical effort >Smoke weed >Immediately get hungry and/or >Get paranoid for no reason >Have to smoke more after 60-90 mins or you're barely high anymore This has got to be the biggest meme "drug" out there. At least with alcohol you feel good and want to do s---, as long as you don't drink too much. The only upside weed has is there is no such thing as smoking too much, because worst that'll happen is you fall asleep. So I guess if you want something "safe", weed makes sense but that's where it ends.

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anon is hanging out with his friends | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/26/22(Tue) 19:48:10 No.882758454 4B2DB20C-59E1-4390-8631-2DE86A474A46.jpg 103 KB JPG >be me >walking through town with homies >buddy says "Log spotted." >finds hole in log >proceeded to hump it what did he mean by this?

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asiannon uses his rice brain | /r/Greentext

File: wisemanoncesaid.jpg (139 KB, 1200x1200) >konnichiwa n-----sans >bad idea but roll with it >mfw they laugh >call me their n---- >start to say hello to everyone like this chinkanon 07/26/22(Tue)23:02:25 No.882776715 ► >be me >asian >full on chink here >decide f--- it, im chink, got nothing to win in life except for bitch wife or twink >go full chink >say konichiwa and use an incredibly racist asian tone >see black people >chink.exe >pretend like i just started speaking english >the look on white womens faces never cease to amaze >black people laugh it off >sometimes people try to correct me but i go >i so sorry i no speak english, random chinese gibberish its so easy to just chink it out and have fun

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Anon has a theory | /r/Greentext

File 1325915386.jpg-(119 KB, 425x558) Anonymous 01/07/12(Sat)00:49:46 No.372634533 [Reply] Imagine punching somebody so hard that they turned into a door. Then you found out that's where ALL doors come from, and you got initiated into a murder club that makes doors. The stronger you punch, the better the door. So there are like super strong murderers who punch people into Venetian doors and s--- 5 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.

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Anon cares about his tables | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/26/22(Tue)19:27:29 No.882769566 >be me >autist >like wooden tables >really like wooden tables >family has party in my house full of wooden tables >spend the entire time making sure every drunk 55 year old man has a coaster >they keep ignoring the coasters i give them >eventually get p----- and take all the beverages and lock them in the shed 345 KB PNG >shouldve used your coaster drunkie >family and drunkies start complaining about my presence >"shouldve used your coaster if you want to drink. youre going to damage the wood" i tell them >parents demand i give beverages back >refuse >dad takes his belt off >ohfuck.mp3 >think quickly >grab unused coasters as dad chases me >start throwing them like an anime villain throws playing cards >eventually he gets too annoyed to keep chasing me and sits back down like a skyrim enemy when you run away fast enough >drunkies seethe >my wooden tables stay undamaged i am the coaster master, defender of all tables wood

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Anon wants to build something | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 392 KB PNG 07/26/22(Tue)19:42:02 No.882761449 >lived together for 4 years with a woman who bailed out the moment I got really sick and out of a job >got my life back on track by myself >no social life but tried to meet new people >goddamn these woman have s--- taste in everything and can't have a proper conversation >I dont wanna just f---, I wanna build something >good wife material have 35+yrs old minimum >the bitch that ditched me regretted it and is trying to be "friends" again >cant forgive that c--- but we have history and she is the best option I have tf I do now

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Anon is a collector | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/10/17 (Fri) 18:51:56 No.71018690 >have a flag collection >always have different flags hanging 141 KB JPG >last week decided to have a theme of Christian countries >Had the USA, the Vatican, Poland, Brazil and Italy flags >older brother and his girlfriend come to visit >they get my room for some reason, I have to sleep in the bathtub >can hear them through the wall >they are laughing about my 'creepy flags' >they start having sex in my bed >feel angry about that >the wall I am on the other side of is the one with the Vatican flag >shout in a Italian accent >'THISA ISA THE POPE, STOPA HAVING A SEX' >they go silent >hear the door open >brother walks into the bathroom and punches me in the head then goes back >they keep having sex f------ normies

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Anons friend is more of an obligation | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/26/22(Tue)17:48:13 No.69566696 158 KB JPG weird situation, what would you do? >be disabled >meet disabled girl with same condition but worse in online support group >start talking, we get friendly >she's very depressing has really hard life >I kinda feel sorry for her and listen about her depressing life >she considers me a godsend for listening to her troubles and consoling her >BUT she's a complete misery to talk to, prattles on about extremely miserable s--- nonstop >want to be a good friend and there for her >Our conversations are very one-sided, sometimes it's just me listening for an hour straight >Most the times she never asks about me, just wants to talk about herself >Tried talking to her about this, but it doesn't seem to make a difference >Always tells me I'm her best friend in the world and wouldn't know what to do without me I have a lot of compassion and empathy for this person. but jesus christ. they are the most miserable and boring person I have ever met. I know this is a ultra-specific situation, but what would you do here? I feel like if I just blocked her she would be devastated.

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we are all chuds from anon’s point of view | /r/Greentext

07/21/22(Thu)15:20:30 No.14687077 >formula connects five of the most important numbers in mathematics using four of the most important mathematical operations and relations - addition, multiplication, and equality. exponentiation Absolutely breathtaking. Time to pay your respects chud, say something nice about this formula. Anonymous in + 1 = 0 2 KB PNG 126 Replies / 10 Images View Thread

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Anon on the grindset | /r/Greentext

File: tumor.jpg (90 KB, 1280x720) >Nopillow >Noalcohol >Reduced internet usage >1 hour meditation each day >Sleep 8 hours a day >Water, milk, and tea only beverages Anything else I'm missing? Anonymous 07/25/22(Mon)00:10:57 No.67712897 >>67714211 >>67714236 >>67714454 >>67714469 >>67715021 >>67718566 >>67718675 >>67718744 >>67718955 >>67718962 >>67728333 >>67728399 >>67730262 >>67733265 >>67733607 >Nofap >Noporn >Cold showers >Nosugar >Novidya Anonymous 07/25/22(Mon)00:13:00 No.67712927 >>67712959 >>67713166 >>67715030 >>6772268 >>67712897 (OP) >Anything else I'm missing? Yeah, having sex, becoming strong, not being a loser, making money. I can go on

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