anon is a prosecutor | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 208 KB JPEG 2024-08-07, 7:06:17 p.m. No.61478096 > be prosecution with chill and suave mannerism, respected by general lawyer community as a whole > so respected you have an assistant that makes you your own coffee brew to drink during case > famed "never lost a case" defense attorney gets to be in your first ever trial > attorney starts spouting out about some random ass b-------, jumping through so many hoops the m----------- could be in a circus > Imaowtf.jpg > calmly sipping coffee and talking about mild philosophy while observing his claims > judge is about to cast verdict > yell "Hold it." and watch the entire court go silent "What is it, Anon?" > i can just say whatever b------- i want and people will respect me for it "the one who prefers to piss in the sink ends up sinking in the piss..." > everyone is utterly f------ dumbfounded "if you will. consider for a moment that the story you've just created is off by a little bit. just because the witness wasn't at the building the mentioned doesn't mean he killed a man in an entirely different building 10 miles away." > sip 12th cup of coffee, enjoying the taste; an especially deep and rich brew, gonna have to thank my assistant for the convenient timing "the witness, being a very rich detective, could have merely just been at his house. maybe at the grocery store. honestly, who cares? all i'm saying is your loops are bogus. stick to normal explanations next time... the taller a building is built, the harder it breaks when it falls." > dumbass Peedicks defense sweating bullets and burying his head in his hands > calmly sip coffee as the entire jury snickers at his bullshittery I love my job.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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