Hogwarts shenanigans | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 07/24/24(Wed)19:24:24 No.201669998 >"It appears that Slytherin are in first place with 759 points. Cheers, cheers, Slytherin..." Dumbledore announced calmly, "HOWEVER, before I present the House Cup, last minute adjustments must be made." >a cacophony of whispers fills the hall >"Harry Potter..." the aging headmaster said, stretching his legs from the podium to Harry's seat. He stood next to the bemused chosen one, "what is one plus one?" >Harry, completely befuddled by the question, answered tentatively. "Two, sir?" >"YES! YES! THAT IS INDEED THE ANSWER!" Dumbledore yelled calmly. "TO HARRY M------------ POTTER, FOR YOUR HEADSTRONG APPROACH TO THE FIELD OF MATHEMATICS AND SUCCESSFUL DIVINATION OF A SOLUTION TO AN EQUATION, I AWARD YOU ONE BILLION F------ POINTS!" >The Slytherins groan. Another year gone, another House Cup lost. >"AAAAAAAND WHAT DO YOU KNOW IT LOOKS LIKE GRYFFINDOR WINS THE HOUSE CUP AGAIN!" the headmaster bellowed. From under his robe, twenty legs stretched out and started to curbstomp every Slytherin f------ s--- into the table. Broken teeth clattered on the floor, drops of blood spread over the fine oak. "WHAT'S WRONG, SLYTHERIN? EVERY REACTION HAS AN EQUAL AND OPPOSITE REACTION AFTER ALL! FOR EVERY GRYFFINDOR THAT CAN ADD, ONE HUNDRED OF YOU DEGENERATES MUST BE SUBTRACTED!" >After one hundred Slytherin students were gruesomely killed, all but two of Dumbledore's legs retreated into his robe. >"Would the remaining Slytherins meet me in my bedchambers tonight?" Dumbledore calmly concluded. "I have another leg to tend to." >>201680953 # >>201685369 # >>201685591 # >>201697469 #

Share Pin Download More

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: jpg

Resolution: (1080px x 2198px)

File size: 1.06 MB

File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

View All 43,692 Images

More:

Know Your Meme

Like Page 1.8M likes