Anon is a cat | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: a Cat 06/21/24(Fri)19:47:04 No. 77911657 Be a cat 104 KB JPG >owner picks me up >be me >tiny kitten >fluffy as heck >everything is a toy >decide to explore >see weird thing on the floor >bat at it with paw >it's a shoelace >mfw endless entertainment >maximum comfy mode activated >purr like a tiny motorboat >life is good : Anonymous >>77911657 (OP) # >get neutered 06/21/24(Fri)19:51:37 No.77911692 >dont have to worry about Chad cats anymore must be heaven

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon got screwed over | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/17/24(Mon)19:10:35 No.267837047 obito-itachi-nagato-v0-7axcieoe4bkb1.jpg 44 KB JPG >Naruto promised Nagato that he'll "bring peace to the Rain Village" >fast forward to the Boruto era, Rain Village is still a massive s------- while Nagato is forever trapped in genjutsu hell inside Itachi's gourd after he got Talk No Jutsu'd by Naruto Pretty funny when you think about it.

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Anon is the uberman (he has a skill issue) | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_3636.jpg (514 KB, 1200x1628) Anonymous 06/20/24(Thu)19:54:18 No.23509664 >>23510246 >be me >read Kant and realized reality is a human construct >read Nietzsche and realized morality doesn't exist >read the sutta pitaka and saw the emptiness of all phenomena >cultivated isolation from the masses to develop my free spirit >meditated until I no longer cared whether anything exists or not >stopped counting on my nofap streak >still feel bad when my team mates get angry at me in halo Now what?

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Anon and some blue stuff | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Am I secreting blue stuff? 2.67 MB JPG 06/21/24(Fri)15:27:46 No.31484656 >Read an online story >Have my penguin plushie in front of the phone, pretending that he is reading the story with me >Take a break from the story and look at him >Remember that blue stuff has also been on some white t-shirts I have worned Literally don't know what this blue stuff. I remember seeing on my white t-shirts when I woke up from sleeping on the couch. Is there something wrong with my hand? Is there a natural reason for this? Does it have with to do with sleeping on the couch? Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)15:30:56 No.31484673 >>31484656 (OP) # Clean your room and you'll find out where it's coming from. Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)15:30:59 No.31484674 >>31484656 (OP) # Probably ink or something. You are also weird as f---. >>31484680 # Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)15:32:33 No.31484680 >>31484674 # I haven't use any ink pens in years.

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An opening appears | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)21:34:16 No.20033811 隊 tv.jpg 1.02 MB JPG >Hey virgin. Your parents have paid me to f--- you. How would /tv/ react to this situation?

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Claim The Skies | /r/Greentext

: goonano Homework 05/27/24(Mon)02:09:20 No.77625956 image_2024-05-26_130324421.png 10 KB PNG >family out of town for a few weeks >on workman's comp for injury >get super bored and watch p--- >ffw its been 4 days since they have left and ive done nothing but goon and stay edged >unironically starting to worship p--- >walk around house naked leaking pre everywhere and stroking mindlessly while looking at p--- on my phone whenever im not in my room looking at p--- on my pc >mind genuinely starting to get hazy >want to c-- so bad but i dont bc it feels so good to edge >no coming back now how has your week been?

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Should have used a VPN | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/30/24(Thu)11:41:54 No.10976238 LUT what-did-he-do-to-piss-them-off-v0-95vjovhiq26c1.jpg 55 KB JPG >be me >downloaded some sega saturn roms yesterday >there's a cop van staking out my house today i'm done for arent i

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Anon just watched Death Note | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 13 KB PNG 09/26/16(Mon)12:08:04 No.31679831 >be autist >have nothing to do >decide to cast a magic spell because you gotta try every so often in case you DO have those secret anime powers >read 7 is magic number >make text document called 7777777777777777 777777 777777777.txt 77777777 >write a bunch of names while chanting b------- >next day neighbor is found dead AMA

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Anon Hates Breaking Bad | /r/Greentext

File: 1687763988027766.jpg (30 KB, 871x653) ☐ Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)11:03:00 No.200313186 >>200313214 >>200313277 >>200314182 >>200314707 >>>200315017 >>200315275 >>200315353 >>200315384 >>200316351 >>200316558 >>200316759 >>200317214 >>200317934 >>200318748 >>200318931 >>200319781 >>200321189 >>200323305 >>200323400 >>200323411 >NOOOOO YOU CAN RUIN TENS OF THOUSANDS OF LIVES WITH HORRIBLY ADDICTIVE DRUGS BUT YOU CAN'T SHOOT THE HECKIN KIDDERINO ON THE DIRTBIKERINO ☐ Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)11:03:58 No.200313214 ►>>200315706 >>200313186 (OP). >Jesse is le moral because he FEELS bad for his atrocities >> Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)11:39:47 No.200314182 ► File: Frieren.jpg (63 KB, 736x736) >>200313186 (OP) >Season 3: Walt saves Jesses life while Mike and Gus try to kill him >Season 4: Jesse becomes besties with Mike and Gus while wanting Walt dead >> Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)13:20:26 No.200316817 File: sad face.gif (1.79 MB, 275x275) >>200317004 >I am le sad and le tired of it all Stellar performance. ☐ Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)13:37:56 No.200317214 ►>>200317277 >>200317319 >>200317869 >>200318762 >>200313186 (OP) Breaking Bad was always a goofy live action cartoon for adults. >two face gus >i am le one who knocks >bbbb-bonfire >machine gun in trunk killing nazis >magnets bitch >any scene with le 4d chessmaster gus >it's not le meth >the two assassin brothers

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Lol first time seeing an actually funny joke on /tv/ in quite a while | /r/Greentext

4 @DiscussingFilm Netflix will begin selling their own popcorn for $4.49 per bag. POPCORN INDIANA POPCORN INDIANA. NETFLIX NETFLIX Now Popping CULT CLASSIC CHEDDAR KETTLE Now Popping SWOONWORTHY CINNAMON KETTLE wh • 2:37 PM Jun 20, 2024 5.9M Views 611 1.4K FAMILY SIZE! 6.3K FAMILY SIZE! 618 KINO IS BACK ON THE MENU BOYS Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)13:05:31 No.200321943 ►>>200321974 >>200321978>>200321981 >>200321982 >>2003 LITERALLY Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)13:06:58 No.200321974 >>200321943 (OP) >buy the white cheddar >open it up >it's black >>200321992 >>200322050 >>200322111 >>200322435 >>200322696 >>200322828 >>200323137

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A lot can change in 25 years | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/08/24(Sat) 15:49:59 No. 199908836 183626010.jpg 104 KB JPG >watch televised concert from 25 years ago >everybody is skinny and happy What changed?

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No fun Down Under | /r/Greentext

AL I made a mistake coming to Australia I made a mistake coming to Aus(...) 12 KB JPG >wages are low 06/16/24(Sun)09:24:19 No.471288099 This is not what I expected... >food is blant >lack of culture outside of melbourne >everyone is rude >everyone drinks alcohol >it's too expensive >houses are boring >nightclubs are boring >woman are trash and very self centered >no place for my religion >nothing to do here >tourist destinations are crap >no one makes the effort to learn my culture don't come here, i regret every second of it

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Anon on millenial | /r/Greentext

File: maxresdefault (1).jpg (91 KB, 1280x720) MILLENNIAL WRITING Millenial writing Anonymous 06/19/24(Wed)13:45:23 No.200271103 >>200271147 >>200271151 >>200271249 >>200271307 >>200271312 >>200271319 >>200271363 >>200271372 >>200271434 >>200271437 >>200271534 >>200271620 >>200271628 >>200271765 >>200271876 >>200271896 >>200271910 >>200272054 >>200272242 >>200272276 >>200272279 >>200272854 >>200273110 >>200273386 >>200273467 >>200273680 >>200273695 >>200273834 >>200274107 >>200274383 >>200274412 >>200274450 >>200277233 >>200277243 >>200278484 >>200278553 >>200278637 >>200279872 >>200282270 >>200284007 >>200284142 >>200284187 >>200284453 >>200284889 >character HAS to make a political statement even when it has nothing to do with the plot >mc is left leaning and antag is right leaning >black character can't go 2 seconds without mentioning white people >male nudity good female nudity bad >tradional gender role archetypes bad >villain is a mass murderer psycopath but draws the line at making racist remarks What are some other examples?

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