Anon's hookup strategy | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous (ID: d//iSEDJ 04/05/24(Fri) 07:42:53 No.464003519 >>464003058 # you're so f------ dumb c---, i hooked up with girls the way everyone did >go to party >see attractive girl >tell a male friend she is cute 2.16 MB WEBM >5-10 mins later word has gotten around that you said shes cute >20 mins later ur in the bathroom hooking up You didnt even talk to her, you talked to someone else about her and she comes to you INCELS do not exist >>464003590 # >>464003737 # >>464004048 # >>464004217 # >>464004558 # >>464005354 # >>464007736 # >>464011418 # >>464012752 #

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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I'm the guy you see | /r/Greentext

File: bane.png (339 KB, 744x526) B Anonymous 05/19/23(Fri)07:29:43 No.637668625 >>637668659 >>637668695>>637668948 >>637669559 >>637669691 >>637670921 >>637671098 >>637674419 >>637674940 >>637675347 >>637678501 >>637679510 >>637681109 >>637683271 >>637703128 >>637719664 >You see, a guy like me.... Anonymous 05/19/23(Fri)07:30:14 No.637668659 >>637735041 >>637668625 (OP) freak Anonymous 05/19/23(Fri)07:30:49 No.637668695 >>637668625 (OP) >has no games >>637668848 >>637671049 >>637677819 >>637718682 >>637731582 Anonymous 05/19/23(Fri)07:32:56 No.637668848 >>637669475 >>637670726 >>637671040 >>637673278>>637673508 >>637673610 >>637674285 >>637675478 >>637675962 >>637676551 >>637677175 >>637677206 >>637677620 >>637677764 >>637678027 >>637678609 >>637678953 >>637679339 >>637679946 >>637680031 >>637680149 >>637680573 >>637680606 >>637682319 >>637682340 >>637683463 >>637683464 >>637683606 >>637684842 >>637685672 >>637686031 >>637690063 >>637690513 >>637690708 >>637690938 >>637694409 >>637694671 >>637698185 >>637698601 >>637700262 >>637702941 >>637703361 >>637703434 >>637704086 >>637704765 >>637705567 >>637706698 >>637707942 >>637707959 >>637708115 >>637710715 >>637710947 >>637711079 >>637711252 >>637712035 >>637712371 >>637712489>>637712561 >>637713373 >>637714405 >>637715236 >>637715754>>637716184 >>637717947 >>637718595>>637718639 >>637719356 >>637719363 >>637719854 >>637724349 >>637725315 >>637726230 >>637726289 >>637726365 >>637728110 >>637728669 >>637729476 >>637729978 >>637730223 >>637730882 >>637731148 >>637731331 >>637731396 >>637731460 >>637731582 >>637734682 >>637668695 ESL moment. It's "have no games" since he's talking about himself, retard

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anon plays a game | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous The Number Come 242 KB JPG >be me 04/05/24(Fri)17:20:09 No.916442655 >go to friends house, hangout with her+our mutual friend >having fun, she's streaming stuff on the TV, we are joking around with some fella who keeps sending her toilet pics and pics of his poop in the toilet >get grossed out and we stop opening his snaps >night goes on, forget to make dinner, don't care >dm her the number game, after asking if she wants to play it >end up playing the number game with her, mutual friend doesn't want any part of it >find out a LOT about her >find out what she likes and doesn't like >go home, go to bed >no sleep due to thinking I f----- my friendship up >ffw to today >she's more interested in what I msg her about >invite her and a mutual friend to a party in July, both agree >not invited to a local restaurant due to no money >plan to ask her if I can go next week or the week after >tomorrow we are doing karaoke with her voice changing mic /b/ros I think I hit the lottery, I have an awesome friend that I get to hangout with. I always wished I had this in highschool and now its finally happened that I'm in college.

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Anon lost his v-card to a cavern | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous lost my v-card but I want to v(...) 191 KB JPG 04/05/24(Fri)21:55:14 No.77026141 >girl from work starts showing interest in me >been khhv for 25 years >she's super cute tho >we date >goes surprisingly not terrible >she's very into me it seems >late night >we are alone together at her place >"anon, before we go further, I have something to tell you" >o s--- here comes the STDs >no she just has a massive gaping vag >her bedroom has several gigantic dragon dildoes >lined up in order from smallest to largest >the largest is as big as my arm, she says she can't even fit it all >already regret >go thru with it anyway >nothing else wrong with her except c------ is impossible for both of us >honestly one of the nastiest things I have ever done in my life >want to ghost her but dunno how without looking like the biggest a------ ever The issue is that people here keep telling me "that is just genetics" and I don't know how you can look yourself in the mirror when you tell such obvious lies

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anon is a Proud, Hopeful Zionist | /r/Greentext

File: Screenshot 2024-04-05 133218.jpg (51 KB, 605x414) G. Globe Eye News @GlobeEyeNews - 2h Iran: These are the last days for Israel 148 420 2.8K ılı 63K B israel Mark 04/05/24(Fri)13:50:15 No.77027823 >Be Israel >Found your country under the pretense of an ancient state from millennia ago >claim that all religious or ethnic jews are automatically native to this specific plot of land even if their ancestors left thousands of years ago >ethnically cleanse nearly 750,000 Palestinian Civilians from your new land >Continuously Suck the C--- of American Funds so you can keep acting cocky with your arab neighbors >ffw Now >The brown people we keep in that tiny strip of land with little food or water decide to fight back >F------ mass kill every civilian you see (unironically not that big of an exaggeration) >So cocky you outright say no to the US whos telling you to stop r----- kids in Gaza >MISSILE STRIKE A F------ IRANIAN CONSULATE IN SYRIA >IRAN IS OPENLY GETTING READY TO INVADE ISRAEL >THE US WILL SUPPORT THEM MILITARILY If Iran doesn't P---- out, History will remember this as Israel's doing. Zionism is a mental illness

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Anon's dad was the best. | /r/Greentext

Like, ears in Rain, Scoo Anonymous 1 hour ago 46515536 1474820705804.jpg (23.3 KB, 242x206) 1 REPLY >Born in the year of 1993 >Mother abandoned me at birth >22 year old father abandons all his dreams to raises me alone >times are tough as f--- as he has to juggle work and me >whenever he has free time we play vidya together >we move from old nintendo and s--- to WoW raiding and so on >helps me with school and even encourages me to study in a university >follow his advice and manage to finish uni with engineer degree >1 year ago he gets diagnosed with lung cancer >time goes on and it gets so bad he cant get out of the hospital bed >visit him every single day >week ago >"Hey Anon, was I a good father?" >"You were the best, dad" >"Heh, thanks son" >2 seconds later, flatline >today >finally decide to organize his stuff in his old bedroom >find a notebook >in details he wrote every day he spent with me >"today me and anon went to carnival and did etc." >every day ends with "I hope im doing enough for him" >last entry is before he enters the hospital > "All these years I did what I could, I dont regret (mothers name) abandoning me and Anon and not even calling once" >"I just hope Anon has grown up to be the best he can" You were the bets old man, godspeed to you.

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Anon Sexually Assaults his friend | /r/Greentext

105 KB PNG >be me > 23 year old guy from hungary > be bisexual > Live with your best friend (25M) in a flat > Always had a crush on him, but he is not into it. > He has sleep paralysis, he told me that every timeit happens he is unable to move, but he can see a man with long hair standing next to his bed. Never do anything, just stand there, then leaves. > I decided to do some trolling > Next night at around 5AM I went to his room. > I have long bron hair, which i always tie up, but now i let it to cover my face. > I take of my clothes and stand next to his bed > His eyes are open, but he is not moving, he cleraly sees me, but he doesn't know its me, because its pitch dark > I start to take his blanket off. > I see his huge d--- > I start tolick it, then I put itinto my mouth > He can only move his eyes and they are watching me > When his d--- is hard enough i sit on his lap. His whole meat slips into my a------. > I start gently bouncing on it, feels amazing > I moan in a deep voice > I felt that he busted a huge nut in my a------ > I get of him, and he still lying on his bed looking at me. > With slow movements a put the planket back on him, and gently I walk away backwards, disapearing in the darknes > Next day he told me about it > He doesn't understand why the sleep paralysis demon did this, but he says he did not feel anything during the "shadow sex" > He never realized it was me > From now it's become a habbit, i do it once every week when i see him in that stae > He get used to it, he said at least the demon is not so scary anyomre There is no demon Flórián, you just had ot gay sex with me

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Bro really said Edgerunners is slop | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 567 KB PNG 04/05/24(Fri)13:36:49 No. 197956139 > Grew up watching anime > Loved stuff like Eva, Spirited Away, GITS, Turn-A Gundam, FMA 2003, Bebop, etc... > Stop watching anime around late 2010s because it had completely collapsed in quality while I myself developed a distaste for really shlocky anime. > Fast forward 2024, there's constant shilling of anime on /tv/. > Decide to check out some of the titles out of curiousity. > Frieren- Slop > Cyberpunk Edgerunners- Slop > Mushoku Tensei- P--- slop > JJK, CSM, AOT- Edgy Shonenslop W-- is wrong with modern "anime fans"? Why are they proud of this dogshit? I used to read fanfics during my teen years and quality of writing in these shows is on par with those fanfics. S----- animations and ugly designs too. I think I'll stick to older cinema, books and the occassionally good modern flick.

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First we feast and I’m your host Anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/03/24(Wed)21:41:52 No.20368632 ition Facts 170 0. To autism gang LOCK IN what we eating Anonymous IMG_6975.jpg 214 KB JPG 04/03/24(Wed)21:48:12 No.20368653 327 what a coincidence IMG_6978.jpg 287 KB JPG >>20368656 # >>20368670 # >>20368672 # >>20368778 # >>20368872 # >>20368882 # >>20368942 # >>20368968 # >>20368991 # >>20368997 # >>20369003 # Anonymous >>20368653 # 04/04/24(Thu)00:06:53 No.20369003 >fork and spoon on a hairy blanket you moved to take the photo Women can be disgusting but it only makes sense that the types that want attention on cuckchan are disgusting by default.

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Why do they like Israel so much? | /r/Greentext

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It just works | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/04/24(Thu)17:36:08 No.672418691 >Disney buys Star Wars for $4 billion >Microsoft buys Bethesda for $7.5 billion Todd is an absolute hustler 98 KB JPG

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Chuck on Casuals | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/04/24(Thu)21:59:01 No.672448090 >>672448785 >>672452116 >>672452158 1692560304631.jpg (43 KB, 1280x720) google yandex iqdb wait >You didn't beat the game. >I what? >You didn't beat the game! "Dex sorcery build", for Christ's sake? And you played online too? What a joke! I worked my ass off to get to the ending! And you take these shortcuts and you think suddenly you're my peer? You do what I do because you kill bosses faster and have fun? I committed my life to this! You don't slide into it like a cheap pair of slippers and then reap all the rewards! >I thought you were proud of me... >I was! When you stopped playing Roblox and tried out things like Ocarina of Time, I was very proud! >So that's it, then, right? Keep ol Anon down playing Zelda, cause he's not good enough to be a Souls player? >I know you. I know what you were, what you are. People don't change! You're a f------ casual! And a casual I can handle just fine, but a casual who displays his fake achievements is like a chimp with a machine gun! The Souls games are sacred! If you abuse those builds, casuals come in and force the devs to casualize further! This is not a game! And you have to know that on some level, I know you know I'm right. You know I'm right!

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The hunt to break the neet cycle continues | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 677 KB PNG 03/30/24(Sat) 17:50:54 No.76952898 >go job hunting >Half of the places only have online applications >Many places keep saying they've just hired people or have other options >Online applications ask you to make an account >Spend hours filling out paper and online forms, 12 or so total >A week passes >Only 1 interview

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