Anon smells a conspiracy. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

-nymous 08/08/21(Sun)15:51:08 No.860 >get in >door closes >??????????????? >on a new floor do you guys really believe in this

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon has fun......... | /r/Greentext

>be me >yesterday >friend invites me to his house to hang out with other people i don't know but i get nervous about these things so i don't go >remember when i used to play minecraft instead 23 KB JPG >buy minecraft for s---- and giggles >dad walks in on me playing it >asks if i want to play it with him >dad plays on my old account while i play on my new one >we have fun together for hours >mfw thank you dad. you made my day today.

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Anon gets engaged | /r/Greentext

File: bale-1.jpg (48 KB, 800x450) Anonymous 09/01/23 (Fri)08:51:13 No.74583923 >>74583939 >>74583958 >>74584089 >>74584840 >>74584887 >Gf asks me about my sexual past (she's Christian, so is basically aksing if I was a degenerate) >Think about all the times I jacked off to loli p--- or cross dressed >Say: "Ya know, I used to struggle with that stuff, but God saved me" >Get engaged

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Anon taking things too far | /r/Greentext

34m (8/31 21:32) 905306825.0 Re - 0 Img JPG 111KB (1300 x 700) Dallas-Express-Photo-9-1.jpg 2770 >me be >taking a year long road trip across America in the 90s >right before I left a town or city, I'd pay a h----- to have sex with me >once I finished, I'd beat them up and take my money back plus whatever they had on them and then flee the city ●●● >never got caught and I made like $7000 in profit that year >plus I got to beat random hookers up

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Anons family tree is a circle | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/01/23(Fri)01:16:00 No.905326774 >>905327077 >>905336557 File: 000456.jpg (217 KB, 960x1243) >>905325329 (OP). >be me >2013 >be 17 >Living with parents >My cousin from Mexico moved with us here in the States >She has no legal papers >She entered with a tourist visa >She plans to stay here and not return to Mexico >She was 16 >OK looking big hips short and amazing body >time passes >My cousin and I began to bond >We develop a mutual crush >We mess around >Kiss, fondle, grind >always in secret >She asks my parents if it's legal for cousins to marry in the states >My parents did not like the idea >They rebuke her because our family is very catholic and s--- >We continue messing around in secret >one day >can't help it pull her panties >Point of no return >we f----- >This became a recurring thing >We f----- at odd hours >While my parents were away >or when they were sleeping >Sneak to the garage and have a quick >On one occasion I could not pull out in time >We got scared >But no big deal maybe she was not ovulating >4 weeks later >turns out she was >She is officially pregnant >Parents freak the f--- out >Keep the pregnancy a secret from the rest of the family >A healthy baby is born >Mom and cousin raised the baby as my cousin's brother >But in legal papers the kid is our son >They arranged a secret marriage between us >At least she will have papers now >She eventually naturalized >We do not live together anymore

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Anon is Disney | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/23(Sun)11:44:48 No.72885419 Coincidence? 20230409_091349.jpg 1.51 MB JPG >Be Disney >Fire Muscle Mommy because she's based and chad >Hire Jabba the Hutt >Views go down 40%

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[Insert Joker voice] Society | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/26/23(Sat)23:53:52 No.74519753 aMc D e8e94a791295b559719ccd7cd315abc66287f4f2_hq.gif 3.84 MB GIF >male isolates himself from society because p--- is easer than scoring for love and thus sex. >female isolates herself from society because males are no longer courting her. >base urges take over and she gets the attention and money she needs by selling herself on onlyfans etc. I just realized this. Its a cycle. When you stop participating in society, you don't hurt yourself, you hurt females too, your other half who you could have met, uplifted and kept straight, but that would also require keeping yourself straight first, which is too much hard work and so you don't do it. Its a vicious cycle.

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anon logs off | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 127 KB JPG 09/01/23(Fri)00:23:43 No.74583452 Welp >be me >30 >Went out camping >Sit out near the dock after the sun sets >Someone comes a long >We talk for a bit >She's 20 >Seems to be a thing every night >Eventually get her contacts >Few months in we get closer >Confesses her feelings to me >Taken a bit by surprise

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Anon is a good boy | /r/Greentext

08/04/19(Sun)19:01:34 No.806284614 BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK : Anonymous 68 KB JPG

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Anon goes on a road trip in the 90's | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/31/23(Thu)12:02:11 No.905306825 112 KB JPG >me be >taking a year long road trip across America in the 90s >right before I left a town or city, I'd pay a h----- to have sex with me >once I finished, I'd beat them up and take my money back plus whatever they had on them and then flee the city >never got caught and I made like $7000 in profit that year >plus I got to beat random hookers up

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Anon triggers reddit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Everyone else 08/31/23(Thu)13:29:26 No.905313556 XPROSPEK SEIKO % IMG_2685.jpg 126 KB JPG How trigger all of internet >be America >always #1 Why do they even bother competing against us

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That $400 is barely enough to pay for Anon's tendies and dewey for a week! What is he supposed to do guys??? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous bruh graduate college 01/12/23(Thu)09:55:35 No.71795647 194 KB JPG >get highest paying job I'm qualified for (23/hr) >rent cheapest apartment I can find (850/month) >have to pay on loans (1k/month) >have to buy groceries for myself (~400/month) How in thee f--- am I supposed to make it

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Anon works at a museum | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 100 KB JPG 03/25/22 (Fri) 13:01:26 No.875084480 >be me >worked in a s----- museum >gave tours to classes all the time >the work was boring >the museum sucked >you pay $20 to walk around and read, no interactions, nothing but placards and pictures >start on going joke with coworkers >when training new hires for tours we throw in s--- that isn't true >I decide to give George Washington a middle name >I gave the new hire his study materials >have him shadow my tours and keep referring to George Washington as George S. Washington >nobody questions the S. >new hire takes over tours and refers to him with the S >not a single soul questions him while me and my coworkers are trying hard as hell not to laugh >went back 8 years later after with my own kid for her class >went on to tell her how I used to work here when she was a baby >get to part about George >lady giving tours gets to his part and says "George S. Washington was the first president of the United States" >I f------ lost it >all these years have came and gone >and these f---- still call him George S. Washington >ask her what the S. stands for >she says Smith >you don't understand /b/ >I had to leave the museum I was laughing so hard

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