Anon is Republican. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

File: Republitoad.jpg (37 KB, 684x653) O Anonymous 04/27/22(Wed)21:15:06 No.877057996 [Reply] >Be me, Republican >Start my day by firing up facebook >Do routine cleanup of blocking anyone that disagrees with my opinions >Gotta keep my confirmations biased >Do my morning lookups researching reasons why Biden/abortion/gun control is bad >Report websites that say otherwise to Google >Turn on Fox news >There's a protest against abortion bans downtown! >Everyone I talk to on Facebook says that is bad! >Grab my gun and 15 American flags >Drive downtown yelling out window and shooting gun in air >Get to protest and tell them they can't protest because we are protesting and it's our free speech! >They try to yell something about free speech for them, but their opinion is wrong therefore they don't get free speech! >Shoot guns to scare them away >Plant the American flag >Cops arrive and congradulate me on my patriotism while standing on the neck of a pregnant woman >Get home, TV news shows some idiot shooting a gun out of his truck and at a group of protestors >Get mad because that guy is going to make my people look bad >They will never take our guns! >Strap 6 pistols to my belt and go grocery shopping to make a point >Accidentally shoot a black kid, I FEARED FOR MY LIFE! >BLM Didn' do nuffins start protesting >THEY CANT DO THAT! >Go on Facebook to block BLM supporters Why are republicans like this?

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon is trapped inside his own mind | /r/Greentext

75 215 KB GIF >at gfs house >casually binging youtube while she takes a shower >she asks me to give her a new bath towel >open the door to give her the towel >shes not there >the shower isnt even on >take a moment to process >im in someone's house >last time I talked to anyone was 10 yrs ago >never had a GF (29) >the walls are turning to white >a straight jacket is wrapped around me >im a the psych ward >mfw I trolled myself again by taking the meds

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Jigsaw visits /tv/ | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 538 KB PNG 08/15/23(Tue)00:44:23 No.188751441 >my rip your head off torture machine 5000... le killed someone? 08/15/23(Tue)00:49:26 No.188751624 : Anonymous >go outside with a friend >lead him onto the street >tell him "You have a choice. You can either stay here and wait for a car to run you over, or you can leave the street and live" >He chooses to stay and gets hit by a car >This somehow makes me a murderer This is the logic of retards who say Jigsaw could be charged with anything else but mischief.

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Anon likes chicken | /r/Greentext

[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [Auto] File: maxresdefault.jpg (65 KB, 1280x720) >starts talking >it's a guy >start stuttering and walk out thedoor >forget to pay >get banned from store Pic related Why am I like this bros. The industrial complex and why I can't get bitches Anonymous 08/14/23(Mon)09:57:13 No.74380576 ► >be me >average guy except a lil bit bulkier because I was an army guy >pretty good conversational skills (not retarded sounding while talking to normal people) >at store >bee line for chicken isle >not black but love chicken >Go to checkout >11/10 qt cashier

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Anon has a shower fiasco | /r/Greentext

File: 1691418788433600.jpg (131 KB, 1080x1078) 55575 O /r9k/ the waffle stomp dilemma Anonymous 08/14/23 (Mon)01:35:44 No.74375773 [Reply] >be me, 19 years old >taking a nice cold shower after a morning of working out >i have to take a s--- but didnt wanna get my toilet wet >decides to s--- in the shower and waffle stomp my s--- >tries to wipe s--- off the bottom of my feet >slipsintheshower.jpeg >accidentally lands on a small shampoo bottle and has a 6 inch bottle of shampoo rammed in my a------ instantly >i start screaming in pain >mombargesintobathroom.png >she comes into the bathroom as i am taking the shampoo bottle out of my ass with s--- everywhere on the floor >she starts to bawl her eyes out because she thinks im gay >dad comes in and beats me because he is a massive trumpy >couldnt even explain myself even if i tried in the moment >tries explaining afterwards but the damage was done and now my family thinks im a f----- should i just kill myself?????? □ Anonymous 08/14/23(Mon)02:04:50 No.74376026 >>74375773 No anon, you should not. You have just written an actually funny greentext. Thanks for the kek.

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Anon can't move on | /r/Greentext

9 KB JPG >Be me, 21 >Skinny incelfag no longer >Got first gf >Both virgins, decided to rent a room Horny as s---, kissing starts >Sloppywetsounds.mp3 >Anon I want to try 69 >Points her ass in my face >Real ass person, Boner harder than twin towers >Started eating her p---- >She rest her knees on my side rib >Ate her to climax >She puts enough force on her knees >Side rib boke >Screamed louder than muslim praising Allah >Sent to hospital, didn't talk much after that >Broke up after 2 months >Ass no longer turns me on >Literally afraid when girls go on top of me >Back to being incelfag HOW THE F--- DO I MOVE ON FROM THIS?

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anon wants to talk about games with character conflict | /r/Greentext

Ideal Duo Combination big guy Small Cute girl I R--- I HATE REPE Anonymous 08/14/23(Mon)13:38:54 No.647274395 [1] [Reply] ✓ >game has character conflicts Anonymous 08/14/23(Mon)13:42:45 No.647274617 ✓ why does she hate rope

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Anon is a magician | /r/Greentext

>be me >smokin some of that giggle bush >super high, dont realize that the smoke has drifted under the door of the apt >neighbors call police >wth 74 KB JPG >police knock, I open door Hello sir. We received a call about you smoking cannabis. I can smell it already, so just come with me Anon. >mind races No officer, this is a magic bag of weed. >he steps in, asks Now how tf is that? >start explaining Officer, when I try to get rid of it, it just reappears in my pocket. I'll prove it! >he gets the face, pic related >bring him to bathroom Watch >throw bag in toilet, flush, then do nothing >he looks around confused Where are the drugs Anon? >mfw it worked What drugs?

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Anon is what he is and finds the joys with it. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10 KB JPG 08/09/23(Wed)22:50:20 No.74332767 >be me >ratord >find a job at a warehouse >constantly break something/tasks >everyone thinks im retarded >women in my job talk to me like they would talk to a baby >get turned on by that see you later virgins 1 Reply View Thread

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Anon gets sent to eeby deeby | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/15/23(Tue)00:35:32 No.904356857 1EE84 DEE84 IMG_2898.jpg 543 KB JPG >In elevator at work >push button to go to the 15th floor >numbers go up 1-14 on screen >Elevator stops >Screen says "EEBY DEEBY" f------ christ alive help me

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anonette goes to school with autists | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 7 KB PNG 08/14/23 (Mon)18:04:36 No.904339030 >be me, 19f >decide to take a course for life skills, whatev >all the students are disabled or full on autists >want to punch them, don't >one of the genetic defect cumbags is actually a normal looking, cute girl >find out she has severe mental health problems >justlikeme.jpeg >we are roommates >possiblefriend.png >don't ask her to be friends because I just moved in anons, what should I do? do I leave or do I stay and risk becoming retarded?

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Anon has regrets | /r/Greentext

Gayporn has way too many views a lot of you are lying Screenshot_20230805-023432.png 1.12 MB PNG >be me >Having a great day reading books and s--- >Remember the time I posted my c--- to 4chan and everyone made fun of it for being micro and circumcised >Day ruined

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Anon takes a shit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous the waffle stomp dilemma 5557 131 KB JPG 08/13/23(Sun)21:35:44 No.74375773 >be me, 19 years old >taking a nice cold shower after a morning of working out >i have to take a s--- but didnt wanna get my toilet wet >decides to s--- in the shower and waffle stomp my s--- >tries to wipe s--- off the bottom of my feet >slipsintheshower.jpeg >accidentally lands on a small shampoo bottle and has a 6 inch bottle of shampoo rammed in my a------ instantly >i start screaming in pain >mombargesintobathroom.png >she comes into the bathroom as i am taking the shampoo bottle out of my ass with s--- everywhere on the floor >she starts to bawl her eyes out because she thinks im gay >dad comes in and beats me because he is a massive trumpy >couldnt even explain myself even if i tried in the moment 3 Replies >tries explaining afterwards but the damage was done and now my family thinks im a f----- should i just kill myself?????? View Thread

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