Anon is a forever virgin | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 516 KB JPG 07/27/18 (Fri) 18:05:26 No.775554435 Whats that one fantasy you have in the back of your mind that you're scared to admit? 07/27/18 (Fri) 18:06:41 No.775554517 : Anonymous Don't s--- on me for this guys, but I've always wanted to kiss a girl.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon can't control his feelings | /r/Greentext

105 KB JPG >become in love with my sister >don't even see any other woman as a potential mate >can never confess my feelings to her because it might drive her away and f--- my relationship with my family >might as well just kill myself you don't know true pain 08/19/21(Thu)09:36:25 No.65046961 : Anonymous >>65046920 (OP) # >wear a fake mustache and a trenchcoat and ask your sister out in your deepest voice

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Anon discovers a true alpha | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: LENqiudl) 07/29/23(Sat)03:08:23 No.436157146 941 KB JPG >be George W Bush >invades a s----- third world country because he can >europooreans and liberals weep >destroy the entirety of Iraq >take all the resources >refuse to leave >make a s--- load of money >destroy US economy >refuse to elaborate >leaves Has there been a single more based move in history?

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anon needs to go out. | /r/Greentext

>mom recently bought a UV light to detect cumstains in my underwear and socks >can't fap into the shower because that would clog it >can only acquire tissues through mom, not allowed packs of my own 164 KB PNG >mom carefully documents each tissue I use in an excel table, and for what purpose

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Anon goes to a burger place | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10 KB JPG >go to burger place >look at menu 07/22/23(Sat)20:52:28 No.903075793 >they have the impossible burger >it's $2 more than everything else on the menu >also tastes worse It's like they don't even want people to be vegetarian. 19 Replies / 5 Images View Thread

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Ukrainian anon on chuds | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/29/23(Sat)20:46:50 No.18266777 pol-turds.png 1.71 MB PNG 5031 >I consider myself a white supremacist, therefore I want America and Europe to burn in an atomic fire >I sincerely hate the left, therefore I shill for the communist dictatorships in China and North Korea >I believe that muslims flooding Europe is a disaster, therefore I want Europeans and White people in general to convert to islam >I hate my country because it is a globalist multicultural empire, therefore I shill for enemy globalist multicultural empires >I think that my state oppresses me, therefore I want to be literally the property of some fat inbred parasite >I hate technological progress and degeneracy, therefore I every day use the Internet to watch Japanese p--- cartoons and shitpost on this board >I am proud that White people built the modern world and high-tech civilization, therefore I want us all to roll back to the Middle Ages >I am a real Nazi, and therefore I am shilling against the Ukrainian nationalist battalions fighting russian goblins. And my favorite: >I hate lgbt, therefore I want to have sex with that guy in a wig and a skirt

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Mexican anon is not hopeful about his country | /r/Greentext

File: sddefault.jpg (69 KB, 640x480) Mexico is really f----- Horny b----- (ID: dBmolUt5) [+ 07/27/23(Thu)21:36:48 No.436022015 || >>436022538 >>436022580 >>436022687 >>436023015 >>436023410 >>436023606 >>436023829 >>436024726 >>436025318 >>436025359 >>436025736 >>436025969 >>436026126 >>436026545 >>436026954 >>436027127 >>436027246 >>436027638 >>436027721 >>436027836 >>436027962 >>436028048 >>436028304 >>436028465 >>436028795 >>436029119 >>436029426 >>436029522 >>436029530 >>436029735 >>436029784 >>436029786 >>436029867 >>436029898 >>436030457 >>436030920 >>436031155 >>436032111 >>436032643 >>436033747 >>436034596 >>436037009 >>436038101 >>436040165 >>436040223 >>436041720 >>436041943 >>436042161 >>436043325 >>436043617 >>436044959 >>436049724 >>436050889 >>436052939 >>436053183 >>436053186 >>436053833 >>436054031 >>436054882 >>436055874 >>436057233 >>436058272 >>436064735 >>436069124 >>436071262 >>436072227 >>436072374 >>436074268 >>436075964 >>436076576 >>436076706 >>436077235 >>436078403 >>436079303 >>436079778 >>436079832 >>436080167 >>436080179 >>436080472 EJERCITO >be me, 24yo mexican >i trained all my youth to be part of the army because i want to make a difference >finally fresh out of uni with the intention of protecting my country >tell my family about it >my two cousins that served call me to meet them >they tell me its going to be the worse mistake of my life >one told me he was gangraped since the day he came, if he resisted he was sedated and beated, he was forced to fight drugged in clandestine boxing matches against soldiers from other states >he wasnt allowed to leave or see his family, the few times he was he was threatened they would kill them and no one would care >one time he resisted r--- and he had his a--- muscle ruptured with a glass bottle, he almost died >went awol one chance he had and stayed hidden for years in the sierra >my other cousin told me how he was forced to stay without food for weeks with just drugs guarding nowhere important, he was forced to secure meetings between army officers and narcos >uncle comes in, heard our conversation and tells me he works as a security for a prison, his watchtower is near the female section and saw police and army taking women from the jail at night into narco cars, they would come back days later with new clothes but clearly traumatized. I kinda just gave up on this country, we need to erradicate the entire army and goverment for s--- to get fixed

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Anon enjoy Masturbation more than Sex | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 140 KB PNG 06/15/23(Sat)01:47:30 No.899935439 sex is not worth trust me > be me > 18 > fat virgin > started working out, looksmax > somehow went to club and got 8/10 girl > we went back to her > got nervous > couldnt get erection > I have sensitive penis so when she started blowing me it hurted even more > somehow fingering her > didnt get hard > I felt like we are doing something weird and we shouldnt do that > I didnt even c-- at her place > went home > c-- 4 times while thinking about her Actually sex isnt as good as it looks. I am deeply disgusted and sad. M----------- is better cuz noone is watching and judging your body

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There is still hope for manlets | /r/Greentext

: not Stormy And Lilith 407 KB JPG 07/29/23(Sat) 14:30:05 No.74199144 Female to "Male" >people stop giving you a constant stream of attention >h-------- men feel THIS lonely? >I am so depressed >Detransition Male to "Female" >people start giving you a constant stream of attention >h-------- Women feel THIS Happy? >I am so euphoric! >Transitions. Is this true? do women just live on easy peasy mode? Should I just transition? Being a manlet incel is lonely...

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God bless America | /r/Greentext

THEY CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT Anonymous 04/17/22(Sun)18:00:59 No.53100055 >>53100118 >>53100191 >>5310029353100313 53100348 >>53101307 >>53101743 >Russians/Chinese make paper tiger technology and brag about it to the world. >Americans get scared and invest 69 squijullion dollars in hyper advanced tech to one up them >After 4 years of R&D by Lockheed the new Super Ultra Death Machine Mk7 is put into mass production and begins being deployed >Turns out Russian/Chinese tech either never existed in the first place or wasn't nearly as good as they said it was >Your scare tactics just encouraged America to jump 2 f------ tech generations ahead of you >Cycle repeats

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Anon finds love | /r/Greentext

69 KB JPEG > me, a 22 year old p--- addict > alone most of my life > meet a gril who shares my hobbies > we watch star trek and play DRG together > moving up in phases > I lose my virginity to her > realise the diference between seeking of momentry plesure of e---------- via p--- and the amazing feeling of passionate sensual love making > realise the difference between lust and love > havent touched p--- in almost 8 months > I love this woman so much I am going to propose soon

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Anon eats Taco Bell | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 115 KB PNG 07/29/23(Sat)16:33:59 No.74201551 >be me in 8th grade >before school eat a hearty breakfast of 12 breakfast wraps from Taco Bell and 6 churros >wash it down with two 32oz Dr peppers >it mends well in my stomach with the taco supreme and 7 chalupas I had for dinner last night >get on the school bus feeling like absolute death >every bump the bus hits feels like i'm going to void my entire gi tract >my heavy deposits of fat in my face and abdomen weigh the Taco Bell down and keep it in for now >get to first period with eight pounds of sugar in my stomach >sit down quickly to hide the bubbling in my belly >uh oh, bad idea >the force of it causes my stomach to give out and it all starts coming >everyone in the class looks over >sticky gelatinous s--- erupts from my ass like a f------ volcano >first one hit is Annabelle who was sitting behind me >poor Annie, she never stood a chance >before she could comprehend what was even happening she instantly drowns in a hell storm of s--- >so do the 15 kids sitting behind me however >school is evacuated and placed on hazmat alert >i'm taken to jail and charged with a--- manslaughter >Taco Bell gets off scot free this is why we need to hold corporations accountable 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous >>74201551 (OP) # i believe there's a half truth in this story. you're gross op 07/29/23(Sat)16:36:15 No.74201564

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Squat plug is the only option | /r/Greentext

Board /fit/ - Fitness : Anonymous Shat myself at the gym CHFENSAED 98 KB PNG ▼ Settings Mobile Home 07/19/23 (Wed)18:53:34 No.71650853 Well bros, it finally happened >be me today, trying for squat PR >at bottom of the squat, engage every muscle in my legs >also recruit my sphincter for good measure >audibly spray s--- all over the inside of my gym shorts >quickly rerack the bar, waddle to the bathroom and wipe off what I can >drive home and type this Anyone else have experience with this? It wasn't totally unexpected since I had had some close calls in the past, but it's still f------ embarrassing. The way I see it, I have 4 options: 1. Start doing shallow squats instead of deep ones 2. Start wearing a buttplug to leg day 3. Do some kind of sphincter control training (does this exist?) 4. Accept as a fact of life that I will occasionally s--- myself during leg day What do you guys think?

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