Anon joins the army | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 594 KB PNG 06/01/23(Thu)12:34:54 No.73522686 >be me >used to be a hopeless NEET >everyday I basically wanted to kill myself because of my lack of purpose >get contacted by an Army recruiter >got nothing to lose >take the Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery (ASVAB) >do well on the mechanical maintenance portion >enlist as a vehicle systems maintainer >get a $15k signing bonus >feelsgoodman.jpg >https://www.goarmy.com/how-to-join.html

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon have step sis | /r/Greentext

Step sister >Latin American family >Living in burger land >Me, mom, and stepdad living in same house >Go to home country to visit grandparents and drop off something for step dad's daughter >Step sister? immediately starts making out with me. I've only spoken to her once before over the phone. >Think nothing of it and go along with it since she looks average >We hang out but never f--- or anything. >Fling" only lasted for 1 day >I return home. she calls me but I never answered. Stopped after 1 week. >Fast forward 3 yrs, she and her daughter immigrate to US and will live with us. >I see her >Dios mío la creatura. >She got FAT! Slam pig >She is still noticably horny towards me. My brain is telling me, NO don't have sex with her because if i do i will be entangled in her life and i don't want to. She has nothing going for her and i have more going for mine. My penis is saying YES. Probably because I am lonely. I'm 28 yr old Only had sex once at 23. If you were me would you f--- f--- my fat step sister or just say no and ignore her? I

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Anon has watched much unnecessary porn. | /r/Greentext

>coworker asked me to look at her internet after work >go to her room, fix internet, notice panties on floor >the urge arises.png >ask to use her bathroom, "stomach isnt feeling good" >turn on fan to silence noise, fap > walk out of bathroom, shes sitting at laptop >anon, did you just masturbate in my bathroom >p---- scenes flash in my mind >this is my chance >"yes" >get kicked out

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Anon has his doubts | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: beANSBIP) >>429054547 >>429054550 >>429054967 >>429054996 >>429055780 >>429055871 >>429056152 >>4290567 | 06/01/23(Thu)12:40:18 No.429052177 >>429052353 >>429051831 (OP) Lime disease literally doesn't exist Look it up It's f------ hilarious There is no scientific proof it exist There is more proof covid was real

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Anon uses twitter | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 8 KB JPG 09/08/21 (Wed)21:49:33 No.65310615 >be me >have a crush on a girl from college >she doesn't have a fb only insta, snap and twitter >refuse to join insta so make a twitter for the first time to follow her >she follows me back >cooms.jpg >realize if you follow the right people it's not as annoying >actually find a community I'm into and meet people online where we talk about our hobbies, trade pictures and stuff >they all encourage me to ask my crush out >notice she isn't follow me anymore but I can still send her a dm >she tells me I'm a disgusting p------------ and should rot in hell >w--.png >turns out f------ twitter shows what you f------ liked to your followers Anons I liked a lot of loli s--- how can I turn this around 6 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anon thinks women can sense something | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/13/23(Sat)11:04:32 No.73299028 MonkaSSS.jpg 70 KB JPG G-girls can't actually tell if you have big d--- energy, r- right femanons?

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Anon's incel origin story | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/31/23(Wed) 20:22:56 No.900186387 >M25, not sexist ENOUGH >2 women chit chat a lot during work >most npc like conversations I've ever had to endure 60 KB PNG >they also think in "men" vs. "women" boxes >their high pitched voices make me wanna throw out my brain after them >they notice my boiling rage when I address this & started to apologize >ffw 2 days >they start talking bs again which my brain cannot handle >they started to use some sort of "secret code" like some 8 y/o children for ther "girly" conversations >starting to think that women are super retarded and inferior >one day one of them didn't come at work and it was quiet >never felt more blessed in my life >only chill dude conversations about science, politics & war with the boys Anons, I tried to not put people into boxes but women make it so hard for me to not think that they are simply giga-retarded. There's a good reason why most women are not suited for any leadership positions.

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Anon has hit rock bottom | /r/Greentext

File: 8382929.jpg (11 KB, 196x199) Anonymous 06/01/23 (Thu) 12:19:00 No.73522620 >>73522708 >>73522732 >>73522754 >Be me, 25-year-old NEET >Wake up at 2 PM, as usual >Check my phone, still no job offers >Decide to browse r9k for some relatable feels >See a post asking for greentext stories >Challengeaccepted.jpg >Start typing out my sad life story in green letters >Be me, 10-year-old kid >Parents divorced, mom left, dad is a drunk >Grow up in a broken home, constantly moving from place to place >Attend 6 different schools in 5 years >No friends, no stability, just loneliness >Hit high school, things get worse >Bullied for being the weird kid, never fit in >Escape into video games and internet as my only solace >Graduate high school, no direction, no skills >College is out of reach due to financial constraints >Feel like a failure, a disappointment to myself and everyone around me >Parents constantly berate me for not "getting my s--- together" >Sink into depression, lose all motivation >NEET life beckons, and I embrace it >Days blur together, lose track of time >No goals, no aspirations, just surviving >Family and friends slowly drift away, tired of my excuses >Only companionship is my computer screen and r9k >Every day is a cycle of self-loathing and despair >People say "get a job," but they don't understand >No one wants to hire a loser like me >Every job application met with rejection or silence >Feel like a worthless p------------ >Post my greentext story on r9k, hoping for some sympathy >Hit the submit button, the green letters fading into the abyss >Seconds turn into minutes, minutes into hours >No comments, no upvotes, just silence >Realize that even r9k doesn't care about my pathetic existence >Feel a pang of loneliness and despair deep in my chest >Close the tab, shut down my computer >Return to the comfort of my dark, lonely room >Lie down on my bed, stare at the ceiling >Another day wasted, another day of emptiness >Close my eyes, hoping for a better tomorrow >But deep down, I know it's just a fleeting dream

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Tale old as time | /r/Greentext

06/01/23(Thu)05:42:15 No.29050742 >have sex with a close friend >(non planned, it just happened in a whim that I can describe as the perfect storm of cherry picked circumstances, we were both drunk and she had broken up with her cheating ex) >before the sexual act i basically confess my pent up love for her, feelings that I have repressed ever since our teenage >after we f--- i ask her if she wants to be my girlfriend : Anonymous 23 KB JPG >"I'm sorry, but this was a mistake, I love my boyfriend, i still think he can change, i feel like i betrayed him on a childish revenge, I love you too but in a different way, you are like a brother to me" >TFW You know, back when we were teenagers and it was more than clear she had lost her virginity I make a promise to myself to stop these feelings of mine, bury them deep inside of my confinements and move on. It was a promise i broke yesterday and in return i got my heart shattered into pieces. How do I stop feeling like this? I just can't stop the feelings of anger, regret, hatred and rejection. How can a woman want to go back to a man that basically cheats, abuse her and verbally degrade her every 5 minutes? Are women this stupid? This is eye opening to the female nature.

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Anon triggers the libs | /r/Greentext

MAKE AMERIC GREAT AGAIN Anonymous 05/23/23(Tue)22:00:51 No.899776553 [Reply] >Be me >Proud Trump Supporter riding the bus to another rally in Houston >Some f-- with pink hair and a blue hat gets on, obviously a lefty libtard >l point to my hat, he looks away Haha dumb liberals are so triggered >I watch him closely, he tries to ignore me > "Let's go Brandon" >He rolls his eyes at me Haha dumb liberals are so triggered > "Let's go Brandon" I yell louder as I snicker >The other people on the bus give annoyed looks >I sit next to the dumb libtard >I load up some gay p--- that has Bidens face shopped on it (I have thousands of these pics on my phone) > "Let's go Brandon" >He gets up and sits at the back of the bus Haha dumb liberals are so triggered >I get up and pull down my pants showing my big pale ass cheeks >Drop a rotting chocolate sausage out of my a------ into my hand >Everyone on the bus scream in disgust and terror Haha dumb liberals are so triggered >The bus driver yells at me to get off the bus >I smear s--- on the windows writing "Let's go Brandon" >Get throw off the bus by a group of various men >Smear s--- on their faces as I laugh and yell "Let's go Brandon" Haha dumb liberals are so triggered

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Anon has a turbo incel moment | /r/Greentext

36 KB JPG Use this thread to vent out all your frustration and experiences about women and the current sexual market place/dynamic. I'll start. >Be me >Will be 25 in a month. >Khhv >Lightskin Black Hispanic >6'2 >Fat >Have broad shoulders and long arms. >Be told to play n----- ball by my community but turned off by it from how worshiped it is. (it really is a religion for n------ and muds) >Regret now since I probably would've been able to get p---- from it. >Now work in a hospital where my Dad is one on the directors. >Near plenty of mutt thot nurses but get hyper ignored. >One girl that looks like Tessa Thompson that I like says hi to me once and I immediately want to marry her. >All my co-workers try to hook me with her but I never get the chance to speak to her since she's a social butterfly. >Do know she's single though. >Say hi to her a few times. >Says hi back but each time gets more visibly turned off since I'm essentially autistic >Coworker tells me I'm over thinking it and offers to just tell her I like her. >I accept the offer since there really isn't a time I'm gonna have to talk to her where she's alone. >In the meantime I just try to keep it low key. >Today she's in and I awkwardly exchange greetings with her. > When she clocks out she just tepidly notices me but says nothing and walks away. >See her walking away with some guy. >Fight the urge not to go full ER.

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Anon has a movie idea involving the rock and his two invisible friends (and makes a formatting mistake while doing so). | /r/Greentext

File: Movie plot..png (968 KB, 896x1585) Pitch a movie plot starring these three actors ON 109 com 60 Cent The Rock is looking for his two invisible friends. Like Reply Yo guys, I have a movie idea. Anonymous 05/31/23(Wed)10:49:58 No.73514256 So I have this cool movie idea involving the rock and his two invisible friends. >The rock trips over his two invisible friends. >When he gets up he accidentally kicks them onto a jeep. >The jeep starts up and the jeep drives into the jungle and crashes somewhere. >The rock's two invisible friends are now unconscious and can't call for help. >The rocks two invisible friends also have nothing on them to get located and are not on the jeep anymore. >Now the rock has to find his two invisible friends before it is too late. Anonymous 05/31/23(Wed)10:51:53 No.73514271 File: 31ruA1PYZ9L.jpg (15 KB, 368x500) 0 | Crap made a mistake in formatting. At least you can still understand it.

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Anon meet a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.79 MB GIF 05/16/23(Tue)15:51:11 I think it might honestly be over for me >In college No.73338309 >Get assigned group work with cute girl >Somehow she's as autistic as me, we get on very well >Keep hanging out after assignment is done >Talk for hours on various topics >Finally get the courage to ask her out on a date >She accepts >Never got this far, whatever, keep it simple >We're supposed to grab a cup of coffee >Waiting for her, she doesn't show up >Doesn't respond to texts >See her in class the next day >Ask what that was all about >She tells me she came up behind me intending to surprise me, but heard me humming Horst Wessel Lied >Apparently she's Jewish and wants nothing to do with me now I'm not even a Nazi, I just like the melody

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