Dove hunt. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 82 KB JPG 04/19/23(Wed)11:42:35 No.73016228 >annoying pigeons and doves around my apartment >s--- everywhere and destroy my stuff on the balcony >landlord refuses to do something because the state decided to install those wooden plates right under the roof for whatever f------ reason >hear my neighbor chasing them away with a water gun >yells "supa soakaaaaa" before he does and goes full autismo >makes "pew pew pew" noises and such >no more annoying pigeons s------- up my place god bless america

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon uses Steam Deck | /r/Greentext

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anon has a love-hate relationship | /r/Greentext

File: cringe.png (88 KB, 1075x856) love-hate relationship with minecraft Anonymous 05/13/23(Sat)15:24:28 No.637101641 anyone else unironically really like minecraft but f------ hate mojang and microsoft ownership of it? The game has actually devolved into nothing >load world >>637101732 >>637102204 >>637102312 >>637102416 >>637102462 >>637102605 >>6371038 >find village w/ enough bread to survive the next 100 days + a fuckton of iron >spend 20 minutes trading with villagers to get full diamond armor and tools >beat the game like its literally f------ nothing, i remember people in 2014 bragging about killing the ender dragon in creative mode >get elytra, all forms of travel are now utterly useless and might as well be removed from the game >f--- around building s--- with schematica >get bored and quit for the next 3 months Every modern update is mojang adding 4 new blocks & adding 1 new useless mob into the game even though they programmed another 2

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What could go wrong? | /r/Greentext

New Age car "engineers" be like: >We can't make phone battery last for more than 2 days Let's make battery powered cars! >We haven't figured how to make operating system that doesn't crash Making car run on buggy operating system sounds fine to me!

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anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous how to troll normies 05/13/23(Sat)21:30:25 No.73303661 a45.jpg 58 KB JPG dobre >say that you have high standards in women >you want you`re gf to text you everyday >she should engage in sex once in a month >visit you every week at least one time >is happy to see you and not being passive aggresive to see you watch youre friends getting angry because you described a normal relationship to them

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Anon gets caught by his teacher | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 188 KB JPG 12/03/21 (Fri)17:10:37 No.867916346 Parents ignored school shooter's depression >teacher caught him searching gun ammunition in school and contacted his parents >mom later sent him a text with "lol" and told him not to get caught next time >few days later teacher catches him drawing pictures of a gun and bullet with "my life is s---" and "kill classmates" quotes >contacted his parents again >they downplayed it and wanted him to go back to class >later on that day his dad sent him a text "please don't do it" after discovering his gun was missing 51 Replies / 4 Images View Thread

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Anon likes papa roach | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 27 KB JPG 05/24/21(Mon)22:17:13 No.855244018 >be me >be schizophrenic >mostly under control >on meds, learned live with hallucinations >have an imaginary friend to help cope >name is Bill, is a plastic fork with a face drawn on it >talking to Bill helps keep me grounded >be last week >see three women with a string >know the string is my life >f--- they're gonna cut my life >don't wanna die, know it's not real but still scared >f--- did I take my meds? >they go to cut the string, I yell no >they cut it, I feel my life slipping >they keep cutting, the pieces they cut off turn into little pizzas >like those bagel bites >w--.jpeg >Bill will help calm me down >turn to Bill, f---, it's not Bill >just a fork with a face, can't calm me down >cut my life into pizzas >this is my plastic fork

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Anon worked at fast food | /r/Greentext

>>334145223 (OP) Nails. Why do their women use those ridicolously long nails? Anonymous (ID: WfwTkuG9) 08/13/21(Fri)22:31:22 No.334152625 ► >>334152752 >>334154948 >be me >work fastfood s------- drive through open till 4am >every other car is a nogger who stinks of weed with 4 kids in the car >ok maam its 12.57 due to a coin shortage we are only taking exact change or card payment >noggress does not respond, hands me a twenty >exact change ma'am Anonymous (ID: (N68hOgE)) 08/13/21 (Fri)22:52:19 No.334154948 File: 1622008776597.jpg (21 KB, 563x503) >still no response >f------ whatever. do the best i can >hands her bag of food out of the window >she has her window rolled 3/4ths of the way up >stack of boxes wont fit through the gap >she just keeps tugging at the bag like an animal >awwshiettgotdammwhywonnadamnthangwork >nogger voice from inside car 'jus open tha do' >noggress opens the door ripping the bag out of her grip and her fried chicken meal spills all over the pavement why are n------ >>334152625 >why are n------ Solid question, why are n------?

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Anon goes for a walk around the neighborhood | /r/Greentext

Vermont BFH 368 >be me >live in nice neighborhood on west coast >enjoy long walks around tree-lined avenues >see a big SUV with green vermont plates >imagine them driving across the whole country to get here >maybe it is a family on a long roadtrip >maybe they saw some amazing sights along the way like the grand canyon, mt rushmore, the rockies and the great salt lake >maybe they made beautiful memories that will last a lifetime >maybe the family bonded in a way they hadnt before and this special trip will forever be their happiest memory >maybe the exposure to the different communities and geographies of america will open their minds and expand their horizons >snap myself out of my daydreaming >my brother told me this morning that a venezuelan family has moved to the area >these people are theives and rapists >they would hunt me for sport and r--- my bones >I must be vigilant and proceed with caution

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Aussie anon exposes the Iwo Jima hoax | /r/Greentext

File: Iwo Jima.jpg (342 KB, 1600x1244) The Battle of Iwo Jima never happened Anonymous (ID: 0QBw2sN6) 05/12/23 (Fri) 19:40:11 No.426842113 ► >>426844740 >>426849512 >marine high command were worried they would have budget cuts after the war and would go back to being naval security >they needed a massive victory they could film and show off >so they stage one >21,000 japanese soldiers apparently lived on an island without any food resources, natural water and barely any supplies coming in for months..somehow >tadamichi kuribayashi spends most of his life in america working in dc, has strange photo shopped pictures and his body is never found >takeichi nishi spends most of his life traveling around the world and is best friends with charlie chaplin, he too has strange photo shopped pictures and his body is also never found >takeichi's 28 tanks all sink aboard nisshu maru but he gets 22 of them later..somehow >despite the tank gun barrels being removed from the tanks and placed into the soil they still worked perfectly and had no problems..somehow >james bradley (one of the flag raisers sons) and author of the book 'flags of our fathers' now doubts his dad ever even raised the flag in the first place >despite the japanese supposedly having loads of underground tunnels they dug for months/years prior to the battle, majority of these tunnels either can't be located or are off limits to the general public...for some reason >most of the """tunnels"" you can visit are instead caves >out of the 17,800 supposed japanese dead, 12,000 of those bodies are "missing" and another 3,000 are in .......hiding...somehow The entire thing was nothing more than a photo op devised by glowies. Anonymous (ID: 0QBw2sN6) 05/12/23(Fri)19:42:03 No.426842245 ► File: Tadamichi Kuribayashi.jpg (132 KB, 671x979) Here's a totally real definitely not photo shopped photo of Tadamichi Kuribayashi Anonymous (ID: OQBw2sN6) 05/12/23(Fri)20:03:15 No.426843888 ► File: Japanese PM vows to find (...).jpg (81 KB, 956x632) Japan This article is more than 12 years old Justin McCurry in Tokyo Tue 15 Feb 2011 21.49 AEDT Japanese PM vows to find missing soldiers Remains of 12,000 soldiers still missing on Iwo To, also known as Iwo Jima, after 1945 battle with the US Japanese prime minister Naoto Kan, left, helps to exhume human remains at a mass grave site on Iwo To island last year. Photograph: David Guttenfelder/AP There are retards out there who still think this s--- happened >> Anonymous (ID: 0QBw2sN6) 05/12/23 (Fri)20:34:58 No.426846177 ► File: Zero plane crash during t(...).jpg (103 KB, 500x365) >japanese zero shot down over alaska in 1942 >the plane is quickly recovered and the dead j-- tadayoshi koga is "*""quietly""" buried >fast forward to 1988 and author jim rearden leads a team to find find the pilot's body >they come across his grave and decide to dig it up >there's nothing there not a single bone >the us gov quickly intervenes and mentions that they actually dug up nearly all the bodies and re-buried them on adak island >the us gov also doesn't mention where exactly they re-buried the dead japanese on adak Well it seems Iwo Jima isn't the only event that's fake about the Pacific Theater, Aleutian Islands campaign might be as well. Jeez I wonder what else is fake about the Pacific War, it seems it might be a lot. It's not as bad as the Holohoax but it's not looking good.

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Femanon rejected by Christ bro | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 26 KB JPG 2 Replies : Anonymous 05/13/23(Sat)02:21:58 No.73300049 >another weekend of playing with the cats, exercising, hiking alone, and reading I need a bf but moids will never approach me. View Thread 05/13/23(Sat)02:25:14 No.73300064 >be me >hiking alone with my dog >see femanon hiking alone with her dog as well >she smiles at me and slows down, signaling me to talk to her >give her some casual chit chat, compliment her dog >she is playing with her hair and trying to get me to flirt with her >tell her to enjoy her walk and then I leave sorry, femanon. I've taken a vow of celibacy for Christ.

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Anon is a shithead | /r/Greentext

2:32 Board /b/ - Random : Anonymous boards.4chan.org - Private 85 KB JPG Settings Mobile Home UUI11/21/14.00. TO NO.034 17 JJJU >got my brother's spare key because we live a walking distance away >we buy the same kind of bread because that's the same one we had at home >he's a man of schedule, goes shopping the same day every week, he goes on the same walk at the same time of day every day >always hated how irregular my habits are >decide to be a s------- for no reason >get a bag of bread on the same day he's gone shopping >toast the entire thing and put it back in the bag >wait until it's time for brother's walk 13 >take my bag of toast and sneak in with my keys >know where he keeps his bread, switch the bag of bread with the bag of toast >toast two slices of bread to make the whole house smell like toast >escape once they're done >make sure I left no mark in the house, touch nothing >make it to home, start gaming >25 minutes later I get a text "I don't know how or why you've done this but I will f------ end you." View Thread

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Anon's relative reports on California social services | /r/Greentext

Los Angeles Insider here. Wanna know how "Immigration" is affecting CA? Anonymous (ID: YAOQTOR) 05/12/23 (Fri)18:02:56 No.426834266 >>426834375 >>426834523 >>426834565 >>426834732 >>426834933 >>426835011 >>426835180 >>426835217 HOLLYWOOD From a family member in Social Services Management: 1) Hundreds of thousands of both Ukrainians AND Russians fled here. That number is suppressed. Social services for them MAXXED out. They weren't a burden on the system, but many of them came with money, the Russian ones moreso. And they were still receiving benees from L.A County/CA. File: images.jpg (13 KB, 310x163) 2) They are now overloaded with people from multiple countries which migrated here through Texas or Southern California (San Diego). The people coming across are overwhelming medical systems. Diabetes and joint problems are the big burdens. These people have the bodies of 50 year olds when they're in their 30s. 3) CA literally depends on smokers and alcoholics to fund the systems through tax revenue, but the "Migrants" are stretching it to the brink, STILL. 4) You're not being told by Gavin Newsom how many hospitals are near bankruptcy. CA hides the data, it's scam. Primarily the effect DIABETES has alone on the CA medical system (Hispanics and Filipinos). The Russians and Ukrainians don't have the same issue, but they work the system too. 5) CA has a problem getting REVENUE to match the output, because many people have left, died, or there are so many under the table payouts, that it cannot match what we spend. The state DEBT is WAY more than you realize. We're talking nearly a TRILLION...and they legit think that B------ will make up the gap. But they're not, and nobody here dares say anything. tldr; CA is literally crippling itself and systems are on the brink of collapse., and it's literally due to Illegal Immigration and the cumulative effect. And it's about to go into hyperdrive. Anonymous (ID: YAOQTOR) 05/12/23(Fri) 18:11:02 No.426834997 I forgot to add. The HISPANIC "Migrants" demand D--- PILLS from whatever medical social services they get. These are Men that are mostly single, unmarried, or don't even date at all. VIAGRA is a top priority for these Orc ASSHOLES when they get here.No joke.

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