Anon encounters a Dutch | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous B 38 KB JPG 06/08/21 (Tue)19:51:50 No.146433504 >have a coworker who is Dutch >we both need to go to the same project the next day >offer to drive and say I will pick him up >he says thanks and gives me his adress >the next day I drive over to his home >he isn't fully ready to leave yet but offers me to wait inside >he asks if I want a coffee >say sure because I didn't have my morning coffee yet >his wife makes me a coffee while he finishes getting ready >drive him to the project and drop him back of at his home in the evening >he says "thank you so much for driving anon!" >get home myself >hear a notification comming in on my phone >it is a 'tikkie' for 0.50 EUR from my Dutch colleague for the morning coffee I had at his place

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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□ Anonymous (ID: nijTRMfw) 05/03/23(Wed)22:44:24 No.425677205 >>425677862 >>425678069 >>425684462 File: FvFfgJQXwAAI-B4.jpg (113 KB, 1015x1024) יהודה Louis Chase >>425659741 (OP) @louisfchase what i look like / what jkr thinks i look like

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Anon can't wait for the robot police | /r/Greentext

>>58033258 (OP) # >Be you in 2033 >Try to steal an old, rickety 2022 Tesla >You accidentally set off the alarm >The McPolice have already been notified >They send out the camera drones and the McRape bots >You see the McRape bots come running around the corner of block in your rearview mirror >their cocks flapping as they run >One of the Drones EMPs the car killing it and causing the doors to lock >feeling of panic, and raw fear swells up in your chest right as the McRape bots make it the car >They surround it and one smashes the windshield and grabs you by the collar >You try to break free but it has a grip of iron >Two other McRape bots come over and help the first pin you to the ground ass up >The firs one rips of your clothing while the others restrain you > As you strain your neck trying to see what is going on you see their 9 inch silicon d---- beginning to grow and harden >The first one now mounting your naked ass, presses its rubber hardon into you >Another one uses its c--- to gag you by gaping your throat with its 8 inch silicon girth >The camera drones begin recording and live streaming to all the smart billboads nearby >It begins thrusting using its McVax fluid mixed with blood for lube >After 30 minutes it finishes, filling you with its McFlurry goodness >the bots sprint away to the scene of another crime as quickly as they came >You lay there a traumatized, McBuckbroken shell of a man The ultimate police force

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Anon is Blackpilled | /r/Greentext

File: 20230429_032517.jpg (55 KB, 500x500) allanisenang An .com I'm rather proud of my ability to tell lies. I can trick not only others, but even my own heart. -Celestia Lidenberg (Danger Range) Anonymous 04/30/23(Sun)21:08:32 No.73157602 [Reply] >>73157618 >25 >NEET >college dropout >never had a gf >awkward >anxious >boring >stupid >no hobbies >self harmer >bad person Yet my online female friend with a bf tells me it's not over. I don't argue with her because I don't want to be a downer but how is it not over?? She always says I need to find a non-normie girl but where are these non-normie girls who would want a stupid boring loser NEET? They don't f------ exist. She's a non-normie herself but her bf is a confident, aggressive guy with a job, unsurprisingly. Women refuse to admit what is actually attractive to them and it pisses me off. The truth is that I'm worthless scum to females until I get money or at least get on track to get money. Until then it's over!

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Anon pisses the wall | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/03/23(Wed)12:19:48 No.73184855 >be me >40 minutes ago >went out to the city by myself, i don't do it often but it was nice >stopped by mall bathroom to take a piss 39 KB JPG >i stood in front of a urinal and there were maybe 4 or 5 of them in a line with NO DIVIDERS >all of the urinals were empty, so i chose the middle one, unzipped my jeans and did my business >halfway through my so far uneventful piss, a girl my age with light blue hair and an anorexic build walks in, trying to look as goth as possible like a scene kid >moved my eyes to look at her for a sec standing next to me at the urinal >everythingsfine.jpg >wait a minute >WHAT THE F--- IS A GIRL DOING STANDING NEXT TO ME AT A URINAL IN A MENS BATHROOM >i didn't think too much of it and didn't care desu but thought it was funny >... she unzips her pants in the urinal right next to me >big ol' c--- the size of my forearm flops out >ohsoitwasntagirl.png >just blankly staring into space at this boygirl's direction while i piss and idk why >i get hard for some reason and i start pissing on the wall right next to them and i wasn't paying attention >ended up pissing half my total amount about 4 inches above the top of the urinal >boygirl stares at me in disgust >immediately pull my pants up with piss dripping from the wall and leave >bros should i move cities in case i see them again

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crazy dave spittin facts | /r/Greentext

: Crazy Dave Rararooolll!!! 82 KB JPG 08/02/22(Tue)11:11:39 No.69653309 >Be wabo >Blbladochbliblom!!! >Bubutipobobopium.jpeg >Rarorooolll.mpeg >Daaraaarschuuudaaang 4chan >Bobobolodubobobletam Webi wabo debewebetabojooob!!!! Bubutipobobopium, /r9k/? : Anonymous 08/02/22(Tue)11:14:20 No.69653326 >>69653309 (OP) # >>Blbladochbliblom So true OP

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Anon is an automotive engineer | /r/Greentext

File: 302512240034524739.jpg (4 KB, 300x168) Anonymous 05/03/23(Wed)10:24:46 No.898621711 ► >be me >automotive engineer in the future >all the cars have blindingly bright headlights now >people keep complaining about getting blinded >notmyproblem.jpg >day by day, cars getting brighter and brighter >everyone's trying to out-bright each other >it's a light war out there >one day boss comes to me >"We need to make our headlights even brighter" >butwhy.jpg >"It's what the people want, they need to see the road" >everyone already blinded by everyone else's lights >design new headlights, now 1000x brighter >people buying our cars because they can outshine everyone else >streets now look like some kind of sci-fi laser battle >every car is a lighthouse on wheels >still, people don't give a damn >just want to be the brightest on the road >one day boss comes in again >"We've got a new plan" >ohgodno.png >"We're making headlights that project a movie on the road in front of you" >"Now people can watch movies while they drive" >world now filled with blinding headlights and moving theaters >somehow, everyone's okay with it >leave my job for the day >cross the street to where my car is parked >SUV stops to let me across, its headlights playing "Minions" on the road in front of it >can't see a thing, blinded by the light and the chaos of little yellow creatures >Oncoming RAM F450 playing 'Top Gun' from its headlights is totally blinded by the SUV's showing of 'Minions' >The last thing I hear before impact is a synchronized harmony of "Highway to the Danger Zone" and the Minions' gibberish

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When anon works in cartoon network | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/26/17 (Fri)06:30:22 No.92710292 >>92710429 >>92718704 File: 1439188310068.gif (116 KB, 275x200) I think we should talk more about that writer that self inserted himself into the show, and then made Blossom in love with him. Anonymous 05/26/17(Fri)06:50:43 No.92710429 >>92711754 >>92710292 Which episode was that? Could I get the tl;dr version? Anonymous 05/26/17 (Fri)09:47:07 No.92711754 >>92711913 >>92712083 >>92712207 >>92712956 >>92713926 >>92718156 >>92718704 >>92733076 >>92733912 >>92736468 >>92739826 >>92740102 >>92740704 >>92742719 >>92710429 one of the writers wrote an obvious self insert, voiced it, and wrote so that blossom had a crush on the OC. this character only shows up in episodes that this specific writer writes for and is never mentioned otherwise Anonymous 05/26/17 (Fri)10:18:44 No.92712083 ► >>92712169 >>92711754 Name of the episode? Anonymous 05/26/17(Fri)10:24:58 No.92712169 >>92714623 >>92718156 >>92718704 >>92719195 >>92719929 >>92721450 >>92723517 >>92723916 >>92729402 >>92729722 >>92733971 >>92733975 >>92736658 >>92737382 >>92738169 >>92739826 >>92739974 >>92712083 he's in a few http://powerpuffgirls.wikia.com/wiki/Jared_Shapiro Anonymous 05/27/17(Sat)00:09:12 No.92729402 >>92733975 >>92736501 >>92736609 >>92742008 >>92742758 File: Jake.jpg (26 KB, 300x400) >>92712169 No doubt he's a self insert, the name is similar, the look is the same and he voices the character. Anonymous 05/27/17(Sat)12:09:49 No.92736374 >>92736479 >>92736548 >>92736603 >>92736610 >>92736634 >>92737110 >>92738169 >>92739096 >>92739826 >>92740575 >>92741524 >>92741738 >>92742437 >>92742719 File: what the f---.png (275 KB, 553x459) >you call him an autist >but he gets to officially write his waifu to love him in the series and no one stops him I mean it's not like he ever went too far.. OH MY GOODNESS SQUIDWARD Anonymous 05/27/17(Sat)12:14:31 No.92736468 >>92736548 >>92736603 >>92736610 >>92736682 >>92736830 >>92736916 >>92737110 >>92737664 >>92738169 >>92739096 >>92739114 >>92739826 >>92740191 >>92740722 >>92740994 >>92741039 >>92741524 >>92741716 >>92741738 >>92742437 >>92742719 >>92742722 File: tumblr_inline_oprranjc Gy1(...).png (182 KB, 540x304) >>92711754 We've reached peak autism. |||| CN Appearances Season One ▪ Snow Month (first appearance) ▪ Fashion Forward ▪ The Secret Life of Blossom Powerpuff ▪ Secret Swapper of Doom ▪ The Squashening Season Two ■ 15 Minutes of Fame A Star Is Blossom First appearance Voiced by Snow Month Jake Goldman Writer(s): Writer(s): Writer(s): Writer(s): SNOW VMONTH Writer(s): Jake Goldman Haley Mancini Haley Mancini Jake Goldman SECRET SWAPPER OF DOOM Jake Goldman THE SECRET LIFE OF BLOSSOM POWERPUFF Jake Goldman Haley Mancini FASHION FORWARD Jake Goldman

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Anon likes pop tarts | /r/Greentext

>sitting in my room in the dark listening to music >have a pack of pop-tarts >eating poptarts in the dark listening to music >hollllly fuuuuck this poptart is good >this poptart is the pinnacle of my existence >finish poptart >world is shattered >life in ruins because no more delicious poptart >look down >i only ate the first poptart >THERES A WHOLE NOTHER POPTART >literally cry from relief/happiness

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Anon cooks some breakfast | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/02/23(Tue)11:52:47 No.73177361 ✓ >>73177450 >>73177456 >>73178092 >>73178246 1474054840517.jpg (802 KB, 1920x1200) google yandex iqdb wait >home alone this morning >decide to do something special for myself on my day off >cook a big breakfast >we're talking pancakes, biscuits, gravy, bacon, eggs, sausage, coffee, cold cereal and Texas toast >dig out my old iPad and prop it up at the end of the table >set screen to always on >open iPhotos >play slideshow "Nakahara Misaki (Long)" >eat a tasty breakfast with her >in the middle of our meal at the kitchen table and one of my roommates comes home >rudely barges into kitchen >her dog comes running into the room >all of this while I'm in the middle of telling Misaki-chan I love her >roommate stares at me for a minute and asks what's going on when she sees Misaki with a plate of eggs in front of her (I had made too many for just me) >don't say anything just sit there with my mouth open staring into space hoping I disappear or wake up >meanwhile slideshow changes to pic related >"Oh my god anon what the f---? Why are you watching f------ p--- in our kitchen??" >"...n-no..." is all I can get out >don't know what else to do so I just grab Misaki off of the table and run as fast as I can to my bedroom >can hear her laughing from the kitchen as I slam the door >looking at the time it turns out she got home pretty early from work so that's why I didn't expect her >been locked in here for 3 hours now, don't know if I can ever leave again >f------ roastie Any of you been in some kind of similar situation? Why can't normalfags just be nice to us? What do I do to make things normal again?

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Anon misses the Third Reich | /r/Greentext

File: artworks-000552805185-5va(...).jpg (94 KB, 500x500) What is wrong with me? Anonymous (ID: J5MKVXBb >>425598774 >>425598958 >>425598988 >>425598995 05/02/23(Tue)20:04:31 No.425598383 >>425598507 >>425598625 >>425598646 I don't know what's wrong with me but when I watch any kind of video about the Third Reich, I burst out in tears. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I feel like something's missing in my life. >I coom like 4-6 times a day >take a nap for 3h or longer when I get home from work >eat a bag of chips and fast food everyday >smoke and drink alcohol everyday (mostly a pack a day and 2 beers and spirits). >also can't handle failure/rejection very well >have severe social anxiety >many times dont want to live anymore Why do videos like that hit me so hard? Am I mentally ill or w-- is wrong with me? https://odysee.com/@Honkler:0/FashwaveHomeResonance:a

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