Anon owns a hedgehog | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

File: 1668788701777163.jpg (110 KB, 900x900) Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)12:09:25 No.895175176 ► >>895175326 >>895175766 >>895175889 >>895175969 >>895177561 >>895178150 >>895178200 >>895179106 >be me, currently >31 years old, almost 32 >virgin, never even kissed a girl >no car, no driver's license >no job, haven't been employed in nearly a decade >don't really give a s--- about life in general >hate weeb s--- >eat almost nothing but frozen meals and frozen pizza >own a hedgehog, by far the only good thing about my life >smoke tons of cigarettes what do you think of my life? Anonymous 03/01/23 (Wed)12:12:48 No.895175257 ► >own a hedgehog, by far the only good thing about my life Show us the baby Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)12:16:02 No.895175326 ► >>895175176 (OP) I don't think anything about your life I don't give a f--- what you do. Why, you have a problem with your life?

Share Pin Download More

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: png

Resolution: (1235px x 445px)

File size: 161 KB

File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

View All 43,684 Images

More:

nightmare fuel | /r/Greentext

02/12/23(Sun)13:54:51 No.34066083 : Anonymous >>34063087 (OP) # >be me >mid 20's, overweight, slowing getting into shape >go jogging late at night at this public park >area is relatively safe >most nights quiet and cool >tonight foggy as f--- >street lights aren't helping >looks like vintage black and white horror movie >waiting for werewolf to show up >get my nerve >keep jogging >20 minutes go by >suddenly hear someone loudly, uncontrollably sobbing behind a tree line >nope >nope >nope >f--- jogging >run back to car >never jog there at night again

Pin

context: apparently a vtuber was bullied to stop their entire vtubing career just because they were planning to play Wizard game | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >>43353336 (OP) # >Bullied in Japan growing up >Thinks westerners are nicer and tries to appeal to them >Gets death threats sent by deranged trannys for a wizard game she didn't even play Her story is a tragedy. 02/18/23(Sat)15:16:20 No.43353599 >>43362026 # >>43372727 # >>43412324 # >>43459012 #

Pin

Anon is just lonely | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)19:26:10 No.895186681 DSK 5C336923-832C-4E30-896E-A70DB045C5A2.jpg 54 KB JPG How do you make friends in mmo? >played ffxiv >found a fc >enjoyed it and I liked the people there >some drama happened and then everyone left there separate way Kinda sucks because everyone was nice and then suddenly they turned toxic I just wanted people to talk with

Pin

Anon discovers an unnecessary expense | /r/Greentext

File: 70657014-9EEE-411F-B906-9(...).jpg (134 KB, 2550x150) >>895196270 Saving money by breaking up with my GF Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)12:43:16 No.895193014 [Reply] >>895196201 I just ran the numbers in my budget and realized I could save ~$500 a month by breaking up with my girlfriend. And that's even with having to spend more in rent on my own apartment >save almost 50% by not paying for her meals >buying groceries for 1 instead of for 2 >save around 20% by not buying her drinks at bars (to be fair, will probably need to go out more to meet women >save 100% on girlfriend gifts >save 50% on utilities >save 80% on girlfriend stuff (some of that stuff I might still do) Not even to mention saving on the countless headaches and s--- she gives me on a daily basis. Time to take my life and my wallet back. Should I show her this spreadsheet when I break up with her?

Pin

Anon requires technical support. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/02/23(Thu)04:16:44 No.895196947 >be me >just finished an all-night gaming session on my PC >shut it down and get some sleep 82 KB JPG >wake up the next morning and try to turn on my PC >nothing happens, no power, no lights, nada >panic sets in as I realize my precious gaming rig is dead >call up tech support and explain the situation >after a few minutes of troubleshooting the tech support guy asks me to check if the power cord is plugged in >of course it's plugged in I'm not an idiot >check anyway >it's not plugged in >I tell the tech support guy what happened silence.mp3

Pin

Anon met an English person | /r/Greentext

I met an English person once. Never hope I see another one of those f------ biscuit dunking whitehouse burners ever again. >be me >s----- job working cash register at Sheetz >usually left alone to watch pron on cellphone >weird white guy with square glasses walks in >asks about "petrol" >asks where "toilet" is >says has "bad case of the sheetz", then emits breathy low commitment laugh >tumbleweed.gif

Pin

Anon watches the new Tom Hanks movie | /r/Greentext

TOM HANKS IS A MAN CALLED OTTO BASED ON THE INTERNATIONAL BESTSELLER 9E91C6A4-FD80-4890-ABEA-A9BF4FD79FFA.jpg 1.6 MB JPG >"Americanized" adaptation of a popular Swedish movie > Immigrant neighbor is Mexican instead of Iranian What did they mean by this?

Pin

Anon got his first nudes. And now thinks he's not ugly after all. | /r/Greentext

00 ☐ Girl sent me nudes Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)17:34:52 No.895187038 Be me silly 18yo virgin, can't talk to girls get really nervous when I see some. Fast forward to around two weeks ago, when I started to add random girls on snap. First few girls just ghosted me after sending them normal pictures of my face with me smiling. (thought I was ugly) But then after that some girls actually send back their faces. I blocked two out of five which were obese and ugly (not my type). Fast forward to when I had like 10 flames with a girl looking like a 9/10 (since she looks like she's 21) and she sends me a pic of her t--- in a bra.(maybe I am not that ugly after all) Me being dumb didn't know what to reply back so I just made a face like w-- didn't expect that kinda face(see picture). BUT on the next day she sends me a pic of her ck thong out of the blue with this :). I replied back with the hot face emoji showing my face. Then she sends back a video this time of her slapping the ass and also with this caption: - Wish someone could slap my ass really hard right now. - I need a red mark from a hand on my ass Me being completely shocked on why she sends me another nude of her. I reply back with: How beautiful her ass is (not exact words) Then she sends a video of her groping her own t--- (3 seconds long). I sent back another snap saying she is perfect. Then after around 10 minutes I receive a picture of her mac with: Too Hot to Handle on it (Netflix). Left me on open after that. I could also add, that this all happened while I was in a middle of class. What does this mean, is she just a hoe? (She has around 1.5 mil Snap score)

Pin

Anon skips breakfast | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)12:54:47 No.70125370 33 KB JPG >be me >20 >have always been a f------, 280 lbs at 6'1", 37,5% >decide to start going to gym and somehow get to 15% bf >ff a month, to my latest leg day >realize that i skipped breakfast and hadn't eaten anything before the workout so drink a shake consisting of two scoops of protein powder and about 50 grams of oats with half a liter of milk >doing a regular leg day, the regular leg press machine was broken so do an alternative version of it >push as hard as I can on my fourth set, feel like passing out on my last 3 reps >start feeling super nauseous just after i finished the workout >rush to the bathroom and vomit about 25% of the shake is this normal? is there anything i should do other than not consuming anything prior to working out? i drink like 0.8 galons of water while working out so dehydration is probably not the problem. View Thread

Pin

Anon works at the movie theater | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous IT ENDS NOW 84 KB GIF your bag" >open his bag 05/01/19(Wed)20:09:35 No.52208580 >be me >working at movie theater >"hum hello, i'd like 5 tickets for end game" >5 fat neckbeards looking at me >they're like super excited >"thank you mam" >"excuse me, i've got to check >5 empty bottles of water >"recycling you know..." >"ok have a good day" >3 hours later movie's done >"anon go check if the room is empty" >room is empty >pop corn everywhere as usual >money and keys on the floor as usual >5 bottles full of piss as usual >5 BOTTLES FULL OF PISS recycle my left nut f------ neckbeards

Pin

spicy shit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)21:01:17 No.72405915 [Reply] >eat spicy food >have spicy poops Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)22:34:05 No.72406449 never happened. more larps Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)22:36:52 No.72406464 Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

Pin

Anon gets mogged by a wizard | /r/Greentext

File: 1656347327551.gif (1.06 MB, 400x224) O Should mages be banned from the gym? Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)09:36:41 No.70120037 >Me, a strong and healthy 6'9 warrior working out my muscles in the bodybuilding aisle >A group of manlet mages come giggling and start "working out" next to me >One necromancer from the group brags about his 6p18 deadlift >He conjures spirits to help him lift >I laugh and point this out to him >He says it still counts because the spirits are dead >Druid says he wants to try my exercice, I mog the s--- out of that skinny vegan f----- >He turns into a f------ bear and overhead presses my deadlift 1RM >Then see the wimpy wristlet illusionist wizard "materialize" another 2 plates each side for his deadlift >Try to get external validation by pointing this out to the other warriors passing by >No one else disbelieves his illusion >I storm to the showers in a fit of rage >Just before I can rinse myself the f------ demonologist summons succubuses and makes them drain my daily gains and transfer them to him. I hate these wizards and their fake gains so much. >> Anonymous 03/01/23 (Wed)09:38:15 No.70120059 ► >gym tulpamancer always has a spotter It's not fair bros, I never get a spot >> Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)09:42:03 No.70120105 File: 1656517586050.gif (2.56 MB, 1200x675) >Gym chronomancer ask how many sets I have left >"2 bro, won't take long" >He speeds up my reps and thus reduces time under tension >Make minimal gains and I am obligated to leave the bench after 2 sets I HATE MAGES SO MUCH IT'S UNREAL ► >>70120150 >>70120202 >>70120332 >>70120422

Pin

Know Your Meme

Like Page 1.8M likes