Anon has anxiety | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 102 KB JPG 01/11/23 (Wed)03:03:21 No.892377402 >be me >go on date with qt girl >anxious and think about myself being awkward, causing myself to become more awkward and nervous >date ends >i want to die, i f----- it all up >i text her apologizing for being awkward >she texts me and tells me that i was chill and if anything she thought i wasn't interested in her >she wants a second date tfw why is anxiety like this 6 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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anon orders a BLT | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >decide to cash out some of my gains to spoil myself for a nice meal at Subway for the first time >"What sandwich do you want?" >Uhhh, I'll have a BLT (I had to google this on my Android Smartphone to figure out what this was [Bacon-Lettuce-Tomatoes]) >"Okay, but what bread do you want?" >I-I said I wanted a B.L.T sandwich! >"Yes but I'm going to need a bread" >Umm, organic? >"We don't have that here" 2.06 MB PNG 01/07/23(Sat)21:08:10 No.18783718 >she points at the board >want to say parmesan oregano but I don't know how to pronounce parmesan >say italian instead >"Do you want that toasted?" >Will that cost me extra? >"No" >say yes because free things are nice >"Okay, what vegetables do you want?" >H-Huh? It's a BLT, Bacon, Lettuce, Tomatoes, why are you asking me this? >"And cheese?" >S-Sure >"What kind?" >Yellow..? >"Sauce?" >The special one? >she wraps my sandwich up and I pay >don't tip her because she was really rude to me >it wasn't even that good anyway

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Anon owns the gym | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous THUG LIFE 41 KB JPG 07/13/21(Tue)23:54:35 No.858941903 STORY THREAD. >be me >walk into gym wearing tiny 80's shorts and fake mustache >see literal 9.5/10 girl running on treadmill with earphones in >walk up to her, motion for her to take her earphones out >tell her she's alright looking but not really my type >walk away and leave the gym >hang out in my car in the parking lot, flying my rc helicopter all over the place >girl walks out >do 30mph fly-bys inches above her head and chase her running and screaming to her car >drink the rest of my nesquik and head home

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Anon reduces his stress with one easy hack. Stop caring. | /r/Greentext

R ONSTE >realize one day that the world as i know it entirely begins and ends inside my own head >all of my insecurities and b------- literally just exist only in my head and nobody else cares/is even aware >everybody else is trapped inside their own head too 8 KB JPG >other peoples opinions of you exist just in their head >basically nobody cares and even if they do it doesn't matter >the world might be real, but everybody is trapped in their own heads >nothing is real except what you can see and touch, etc. no stress, no problems

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Anon has a little accident | /r/Greentext

E: Anonymous 07/13/22(Wed)00:29:10 No.881939621 55 KB JPG >be me, 18M, senior in high school >Go to school dance alone >One girl gets left alone and needs a ride home, I'll call her Jamie >I offer her a ride home >Ride back is great, we're laughing, having a great time >We're almost to her place and she asks what I'm doing this weekend >Just then a car makes a left turn in front of me and I T- Bone them, sending Jamie through the wind shield as she wasn't wearing her seatbelt >She doesn't make it out of the hospital alive >Spend the rest of the week mindlessly playing Zelda Minish Cap on my Gameboy.. every night I'd get a flashback to that moment and be stuck awake It's been 5 years, I haven't gotten that close to a female since, does it get better?

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Anon watches the discovery channel | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: vcOLYjqt) >be me >in the living room watching the discovery channel and eating alphabet soup >african tribes uncut n' s--- >all butt naked >really interesting culture >tribe leader's eldest son, baako is showing the cameraman their workouts 47 KB JPG 06/27/17 (Tue)16:04:06 No.1205120 >squats and whatnot >my 15 year old sister walks into the room >look over at her and she's biting her bottom lip >look back at the tv to baako's bbc swinging back and forth >look back at sister and her eyes are moving back and forth in the same pattern >oh no >look down at alphabet soup and sees the word, 'blacked' spelled out >nononono >looks back at baako and he's smiling at the camera and that's how i became a racist, folks Anonymous (ID: (edWzfAGG) = 99 KR 06/27/17(Tue)16:08:25 No.1205167 >>1205120 (OP) # I don't know why but my sides nearly exploded.

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Anon follows Jordan Peterson | /r/Greentext

WASH YOUR PENIS Wash Your Penis Anonymous 01/07/23(Sat)21:34:15 No.21495684>>21495709 >>21495902 >>21495979 >>21496002 >As a man, it is your responsibility to take care of yourself. This includes ensuring that your most intimate areas are clean and well-maintained. I know, I know you're thinking, "Jordan, I already shower regularly, what's the big deal about washing my genitalia?" JORDAN B. PETERSON >But let me tell you, the act of thoroughly cleansing your male anatomy is not just about personal hygiene. It's about self-respect, discipline, and, ultimately, success and personal fulfilment. >First and foremost, washing your genitals sends a message to yourself and to others that you value yourself and your health. A man who takes care of his body is a man who is confident, self- assured, and capable. This confidence will radiate outwards, attracting success and opportunity in all areas of your life. >But it's not just about impressing others. Proper genital hygiene can also improve your sexual health and relationships. No one wants to be intimate with a partner who is unclean or has an unpleasant smell. Showing respect for your partner's body by taking care of your own sends a powerful message and can lead to deeper intimacy and connection. And let's not forget the importance of discipline. Washing your genitalia may seem like a small and insignificant task, but it is a daily practice that requires discipline and commitment. This discipline will spill over into other areas of your life, helping you to become more organized,

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Anon had Liberal Arts | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Life Choices 07/06/22(Wed)02:32:40 No.69302861 >Be me >Graduated High School 2017 > Didnt know what I wanted to do so I went to Community College > Didnt know what I wanted to major in so I picked Liberal arts thinking it was a general education > Didnt realize it was Liberal Arts: Environmental studies 36 KB JPG >Had no idea what that meant > After 1 semester I didnt want my classes to go to waste so I swapped to Environmental Science >I thought It was easier to understand what it was about >I Watched rick and morty and thought I was smart and that major sounded smart >Recently graduated and got a job as a literal Environmental Scientist >I just ride around in ATVS collecting soil >Its okay

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Anon makes easy money by TOPPING males virtually | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/22/21(Mon)19:19:25 No.850243563 >be me >straight 198 KB JPG >not a lot of money due to covid >gay friend works as a payboy >tells me there are a lot of people looking for young male doms >say f--- it and decide to try it out >only through webcam because of the virus >actually don't care about the virus >just don't want to see naked men irl >somehow get clients >don't know what the f--- I do >just call them pieces of s--- and fot >make close to 5k every month >literally easiest job I ever had W-- /b/ros, why did nobody ever tell me making money could be this easy? 1 Reply View Thread

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anon gets nostalgic | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 51 KB JPG /b/? 01/09/23(Mon) 20:22:13 No.892327393 >be me >randomly stumble a song that I haven't listened to in years >get a sudden and intense rush of nostalgia and euphoria >decide to make some food that I haven't had since I was a kid as well Anyone else have moments like this

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How anon lives his life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous skalkwy 133 KB JPG 01/09/23(Mon)16:47:45 No.71763936 >head empty all the time >X thing requires minimum brain power >brain boot up process takes too long >too lazy for that >choose the low effort decision >end up sabotaging myself unintentionally >get angry at myself for a moment >do nothing to change >repeat

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Based Anon fights Beta off | /r/Greentext

IV ●●● >>69538168 (OP) # Anonymous 01/09/23(Mon)21:06:12 No.69538168 167 KB JPG נייט >ILL F------ STAB YOU YOU F------ RAT, GO OUTSIDE. GO OUTSIDE!!!!!! : Anonymous How do you handle this situation? 01/09/23(Mon)21:13:29 No.69538251 01/09/23(Mon)21:13:31 No.69538252 >>69538168 (OP) # >pull my penis out >look him in the eyes as I grow erect >don't make me turn this r--- into a murder

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Anon doesn’t want to be born on earth | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/09/17(Tue)08:34:00 No.36887885 BORN TO FEEL 14 KB JPG >be american >get fat, get shot, become poor because surgery is 100 000$ >be african >be african >be european >get beheaded by isis >be asian >suicide because of stress and no gf >be australian >get killed by venomous animal and lose war against emu I guess no place on earth is good after all

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