what the actual f---? | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

what do? Anonymous 11/29/22(Tue)21:33:41 No.71192618 ► >be me 20 year old M, straight white guy >i walk into starbucks and i see this really cute barista >she is packin my g, like im talkin DD boobies, and the best hips you can dream of >i casually walk upto the counter diddling my keychain that i hooked upto a lanyard with a lego stormtrooper keychain on it >my first opening line is "you really know your way around cream, mind checking mine out?" she playfully ignores me as if she heard it thousands of times before >im determined, i will tap that. >my 2nd opener "hey baby, can i call you a large, so you can smack me across the face and say Grande instead?" she playfully smirks towards me as if she wants to f--- me, i keep my composure and order my usual (Iced Caramel Macchiato w/ onions milk a doubl whipped cream) >as i wait for my drink, my mom calls me and shes super mad (i forgot to empty the dishwasher, and she went into my room and it f------ stank) >i casually explain to my mom, that my musk isnt something to laugh at, its a sign of strength and respect >my drink is ready and go back to pick up my drink, the barista is looking as cute as ever and is practically busting out of her tight outfit >i get a erection >i quicky rush to the bathroom with my hands covering my erection >im super embarrassed, but it feels really f------ good, i start thinking of that shawty barista >i start stroking my monster c---, and i immediately c-- thinking of the cute barista with her double D t------ >i quickly compose myself and exit the bathroom and grab my coffee from the barista and i say "so when do you get of-" >as i said this my hand touched her hand and i immediately came, due to me c------ literally seconds prior my b------- has yet to recover and i immediately faint with a stain on my jeans Anonymous 11/29/22 (Tue)21:34:39 No.71192630 ► stalk her for weeks >Anonymous 11/29/22 (Tue)21:38:01 No.71192662 ► what the f--- is this. is it true. is it real > Anonymous 11/29/22 (Tue)21:40:14 No.71192687 ► break into her house and c-- on her shampoo

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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