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Anonymous (ID: 1qGcF3g9 5323 033 te 05/04/19(Sat) 22:36:06 No.212140509 7= 19F4A150-821B-44A8-8CBE-30154B520A77.jpg 30 KB JPG u-uuuwaaaa~ OmO i-i let my boifwendu do a cummy c-- in my boipuccccwie~!!! and he didn't wear a boicondom O////O a-a-am i gonna get fagpreggers now?? 3: i is a too young to be a boimother >///< c-c-can i getsies a boibortion? Óuò c-can i pay my boinecologist with my boipucccwie-wucie? O////< p-perhaps i c-could offer him my tasty boimilk ;3 o-or m-maybe i'll ask if he will accept a pint of my sticky boisyrup instead UwU

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: Anonymous 10/26/24(Sat) 10:58:14 No.204864976 maxresdefault (3).jpg 73 KB JPG >you're gaslighting me! >you're love bombing me! >you're stonewalling me! >you're mansplaining to me! realistically, how do you respond to this?

GE Anonymous "I will refund 11/27/24(Wed)23:23:27 No.695792406 Valve Just Put Game Publishers On Notice. 1.1M views 5 days ago Bellular News your game." aa 17:58 IMG_7847.jpg 332 KB JPG >DUDE, IM THE WHOLESOME VIDEO GAME SANTA, WE DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT MONEY LMAO >destroys indie devs by forcing them to accept refunds even though the small game they released was literally under the 2 hour threshold for playing and being able to refund F--- Gabe. He's a scumbag. Anonymous >>695792406 (OP) # 11/27/24(Wed)23:25:51 No.695792505 The customer is ALWAYS right >>695793068 # >>695794602 # >>695795310 # Anonymous >>695792406 (OP) # 11/27/24(Wed)23:26:12 No.695792525 If your game is s----- enough that even people who bought it on steam instead of pirating demands a refund it's your fault Anonymous 11/27/24(Wed)23:26:42 No.695792549 Be thankful for Gabe. The second he dies, a brainless profitbot 9000 takes his place, undoes everything he did, and guts Valve like a fish for private equity wealth.

Anonymous 89KB JPG 01/18/20(Sat) 12:25:09 No.818739837 >be me >been having a s--- week >take long shower >lay on back buck naked on bed and close eyes >try not to cry >feelsbadman.jpg >doggo snoozing on bed suddenly wakes up and stretches >Starts walking over my legs but stops over my genitals >shakes head and violently slaps my d--- and balls multiple times with floppy ears >laugh uncontrollably for 5min straight Instantly feel better. Thanks doggo bro.

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Anon peaked in elementary school | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Peaking in elementary 32 KB JPG 06/12/22(Sun)18:05:13 No.69019297 Anonymous Did anyone else peak in elementary school? >be me >not shortest kid in school >friends were so easy to make >no insecurities >no such things as cliques >athletic, could run a lot >smart, could easily spell a lot of words. >confident 06/12/22(Sun)18:09:27 No.69019350 >generally happy >excited to wake up in the morning Yeah I think peaked in elementary school

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anon has moral dilemna | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 44 KB JPG 11/28/22(Mon)11:25:58 No.28535668 >be homofaggot >At airport security >See hot guard on other side of metal detector >Purposely leave my belt on ("oh whoops sorry forgot to take it off") so that I'll get a pat down Is this unethical?

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Anon uses Zoom | /r/Greentext

File: ddd.png (159 KB, 600x800) Autistic/Cringey things you've done in public Anonymous 09/09/21(1 >Be me >March 2020 >College switched to Zoom due to the coof >First time ever using Zoom >Did not know that you are unmuted by default >Start singing in the tune of "You got the funk" >"You got the tism" >"You got that tism, tasm" >Chinese kid says "Ay quit beatboxing man" >I think about this in the shower sometimes and scream into my hands Anonymous 09/09/21 (Thu) 18:20:41 No.65322264 ► >>65321519 (OP) You are a humiliation and a failure. This post is your prize

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FemAnon cant cope | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous will to kad Or The ve g ins 11/28/22(Mon)07:48:38 No.71165846 >be me, couple years ago >boyfriend cheated on me >develop a burning hatred for men 72 KB PNG >start creating fake profiles of attractive women to goad married guys into online relationships >seduce them into sexting, sending money, buying me things etc >send every screenshot, video and voice- message they've made to their partners >have destroyed 54 relationships so far

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Simping 4 Dead | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/08/22(Sat)02:32:40 No.66894250 >BE ME >INSTALLED LEFT 4 DEAD BECAUSE IT WAS ONLY 1 DOLLAR ON STEAM >DECIDE TO PLAY IT ONLINE AFTER SOMETIME >JOINED A GAME, MY CHARACTER WAS BILL >THERE WERE TWO OTHER GUYS, PLAYING AS LOUIS AND FRANCIS >THERE WAS A ZOEY PLAYED BY A BOT >IN THE MIDDLE OF THE GAME, NO HEALTH KIT >FIND SOME PILLS >LOUIS SAW THAT I GOT SOME PILLS AND STARTED DOING THAT PUNCH THING ON ME, AND DIRECTLY LOOKING AT ZOEY AND SPAMMING "ZOEY! ZOEY! ZOEY!" VOICELINES OVER AND OVER AGAIN >REALIZE ZOEY HAS LIKE 60 HP AND A HEALTH KIT AND HE WANTS ME TO GIVE THE PILLS TO HER, WHILE I HAVE ONLY 30 HP >SHOUT THE VOICE LINE "NO" AND GO AWAY >NOT 10 SECONDS LATER START TAKING DAMAGE OUT OF NOWHERE >IT'S LOUIS, HE'S SHOOTING ME WITH HIS SHOTGUN >REALIZING THAT I WILL PROBABLY DIE IF I DON'T GIVE THE PILLS TO HER I GIVE UP >LATER IN THE GAME I AM ALMOST DYING, LITERALLY CANNOT SPRINT ANYMORE FROM THE DAMAGE >FRANCIS COMES OVER WITH A HEALTH KIT ON HIS HANDS >THINKS HE IS GONNA HEAL ME >HEALS ZOEY INSTEAD >SHE STILL HAS THE PILLS I GAVE HER AND A HEALTH KIT >IN THE END OF THE MISSION THEY LITERALLY LEFT ME FOR DEAD GETTING RIPPED APART BY A HUNTER BECAUSE ZOEY GOT ATTACKED BY A SMOKER >THE LAST THING I SAW BEFORE MY SCREEN FADED TO BLACK WAS LOUIS AND FRANCIS TURNING AROUND, STARING AT ME, AND THEN GOING BACK TO SAVE LITTLE ZOEY WITH ALMOST HALF OF HER HP, BECAUSE SHE FAILED TO SHOOT A SINGLE SMOKER THAT WAS PRATICALLY IN FRONT OF HER >THEY WERE LITERALLY SIMPING OVER A BOT BECAUSE IT IS PLAYING AS WOMAN CHARACTER >NEVER PLAYING ONLINE AGAIN

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Harry Potter and the Prisoner of 4Chan | /r/Greentext

Harry Potter but it's written by people on 4chan >Nearly Headless Nick - got a b------ once from a fat muggle and went the rest with no action >Dumbledore gets topped every night by Slughorn after drinking Amortentia >Snape is into goth S&M >Remus Lupin is just a furry who has gay sex with Sirius Black 57 KB JPG >Hermione gets spitroasted by Ron and Harry while they make Neville watch >Draco has i----- sex with his Aunt Bellatrix, who is also a dominatrix >Luna is definitely banging one of the professors, or probably has filthy sex with Hagrid on the hippogriff. >Death eaters all just suck your d--- until you die.

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Green shit for your throats | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/04/16(Thu)09:54:59 No.667133747 I f----- up bigtime /b/ >my folders are full of all kinds of gore and s--- that normal people would consider as psychopatic (actually no cp) >yesterday I felt asleep, forgot to 106 KB JPG turn off computer >mom came in on my room, and for a reason she went through my pc and found all the s--- i have on my pc My mom know me as a good boy, with good grades and doing no harm to other people. She haven't talked to me all day and I think she'll try to send me to a mental hospital or something What do otherwise than killing my self? 02/04/16(Thu)09:56:14 No.667133872 : Anonymous learn to speak english 02/04/16(Thu)09:57:10 No.667133945 : Anonymous >>667133747 (OP) # Masturbate yourself to death you ultra faglord

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Femanon tried to hang herself after getting rejected | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2.23 MB JPG 11/25/22(Fri)10:47:07 No.71120218 >i posted a few days ago about how i was gonna confess to my crush >i passed him a note and asked him to be my friend >he said no >i spiraled and tried to hang myself >ive failed and he probably thinks im a f------ schizo

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Anon have a bubble butt | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 75 KB JPG walking U-Uh... 07/29/21(Thu)21:35:29 No.64761502 >Walking with GF and her sister >Wearing short shorts >Sister says I have 'bubble butt' >What? >Pats me on the ass >Um >GF doesn't say or do anything >Both laugh it off we keep

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Anon is in the movie “Inception” | /r/Greentext

105 KB JPG >be me >19 m >fat sweaty Cheeto fingers virgin >too fat and sweaty for girls, fml >want to experience vagine >maxed out m----------- skill, what do? >fun fact about me, diagnosed with parasomnia as a kid >like lucid dreaming but for f---, super real vivid dreams, often nightmares >fall asleep thinking about busty goddess in my sociology class >runvividdreams.jpg >dream I am f------ busty >so real, feel the warmth of vagine and squishy bust >crying literal tears of joy in dream >so happy, but then >que boss music >busty transforms into horrible insect-like monster >big ass sword claw hands >f------ rips me apart >dream still vivid, feel the pain >wake up covered in coom and tears >next night >bust nut thinking about busty >dream starts, same. F------. Dream. >know what's coming >decide then and there I want to dream f--- busty mutant insect monster and then die for the sweet sweet vagine >same thing happens every dream, usually can coom quickly before death >had this dream at least once or twice a week for at past 6 months >delish coochie is worth violent death >mfw my disease became my power >not sure how to feel >I find it kind of funny >I find it kind of sad >the dreams in which I'm dying >are the best I've ever had

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Anon wants to take the sock off | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/25/21 (Wed)18:39:19 No.65130783 >Coworker at work >Always takes her shoes off at her desk >Always wearing socks What can I do to get her to take her socks off? Thinking about spilling something on the floor but not sure if it will bother her enough. 2 Replies 113 KB JPG View Thread : Anonymous 08/25/21 (Wed)19:29:31 No.65131387 pls she is leaving soon : Anonymous 08/25/21 (Wed)21:16:04 No.65132524 >>65130783 (OP) # Maybe if you blow your brains out it'll scare her socks off

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Anon shares his stair routine | /r/Greentext

>>619342902 # >not using trailing hand technique NGMI : Anonymous 101 KB JPG 11/27/22(Sun)01:55:31 No.619343865 >>619343183 # Looks dumb to me. Regular stairs allow faster ascension using this method, do you guys not traverse stairs like this? I can scramble up in less than 2 seconds >>619343921 # >>619343957 # >>619344013 # >>619344060 # >>619344136 # >>619344201 # >>619344556 # >>619344752 # >>619345049 # >>619345385 # >>619346062 # >>619346360 # >>619346412 #

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Greentext Stories - Anon is pregnant | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

Anonymous (ID: 1qGcF3g9 5323 033 te 05/04/19(Sat) 22:36:06 No.212140509 7= 19F4A150-821B-44A8-8CBE-30154B520A77.jpg 30 KB JPG u-uuuwaaaa~ OmO i-i let my boifwendu do a cummy c-- in my boipuccccwie~!!! and he didn't wear a boicondom O////O a-a-am i gonna get fagpreggers now?? 3: i is a too young to be a boimother >///< c-c-can i getsies a boibortion? Óuò c-can i pay my boinecologist with my boipucccwie-wucie? O////< p-perhaps i c-could offer him my tasty boimilk ;3 o-or m-maybe i'll ask if he will accept a pint of my sticky boisyrup instead UwU

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