anon plays halo | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 07/17/22(Sun)19:09:37 No.882224105 apps.58523.13744479854832406.0affa1b0-655f-49af-ab66- 9c9ccd71090c.jpg 22 KB JPG >be me >Sick day, missed work >Decide to play some halo >Still early morning >Guy starts pounding on my window violently, scaring the s--- out of me >Turns out it's my brother who just got out of jail for selling drugs >I invite him in and he's laughing his ass off >Sees that I'm playing halo, asks to join Just like old times.. today was good

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon is lonely | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/17/22(Sun) 09:35:27 No.69444875 >be me >lonely and honry > go to pornhub and open a girlfriend experience ASMR video >girl in the video starts talking to me >I wanna respond but i know that my breath smells like beer and cigs >close and feel worse than before 11 KB JPG : Anonymous >>69444875 (OP) # Go brush your teeth and stop smoking and drinking also try and lookmax if you can, it will give you confidence 07/17/22(Sun)10:37:10 No.69445215

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Anon leaves his brother to the wolves | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/17/22(Sun)14:10:32 No.882203415 >be me >6 years ago >15 at the time in christian household >had a retarded fatass for a younger brother 22 KB JPG >blamed me for the food he inhaled from the pantry but parents always knew >hed always be a d--- to me, but also had no filter on what he talked about >one day comes to me asking how to fix a bent penis >mf thinks that a bent penis is a sign of m----------- >m----------- is a f------ felony in our home >tell him how retarded he was and to get the f--- out of my room >worked for now >couple days pass and im in my room playing vidya >hear screaming from the basement >go downstairs to investigate >mfw little s-------- has his erect c--- in the f------ vice on my dads repair workshop >hes screaming and crying for help >mf thought he could fix a bent c--- with a metal vice >we both hear my dad come home >leave him to the wolves My dad lost his f------ s--- when he found him. They actually considered putting him up for adoption, and to this day hes no longer allowed near the vice. He turned out to be a f----- a couple of years later and my parents pretend he doesnt exist.

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Anon needs help | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/17/22(Sun)17:51:22 No.69448997 >eat 6000kcal of pizza and ice cream >steal mother's prescription opiate painkillers again to counteract crippling diabetes pain >take 8 pills at once and make a scalding hot cup of tea >drink the tea so it goes into my stomach and seeps between all the cracks in the chewed up pizza dough and helps digest it (I imagine) >start WoW up 125 KB PNG >amazing feeling, full stomach, high on painkillers, sitting in flight form on a branch in elwynn forest >click everyone who walks past and whisper them complimenting their cool transmogs and nice mounts >pass out from sugar crash at some point >wake up to burning smell and mild discomfort >frantically looking around figuring out if something is on fire >try to stand up and feel intense burning pain in crotch >look down >my PSU malfunctioned and partially melted my PC case >balls were hanging out of shorts, resting atop PC case while at the desk >they're blackened and embedded into the plastic >didn't wake up because of painkillers + diabetes KO I'm so f----- up on painkillers and this still hurts like boiling f------ water being poured on me is this how I f------ die phone is in the other room. is there a way to call the police online

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Anon is judged for his VR device | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 237 KB PNG 07/17/22(Sun)11:57:21 No.606129242 I f------ HATE vr for this reason >its super fun >everything i wanted as a kid >cheap as f--- because no vr games have drm and can be pirated >actually healthy and getting me exercise >happiest ive ever been BUT >have literally anyone over, ever >lol anon do u use that for p--- haha YES I USE IT FOR P--- BUT ALSO OTHER THINGS. JUST LIKE MY COMPUTER. JUST LIKE MY PHONE. DO YOU ASK ME IF "I USE THAT FOR P---" WHEN YOU SEE MY PHONE? WHEN YOU SEE MY COMPUTER? NO. SO WHY THE F--- DO YOU KEEP ASKING ME ABOUT MY VR. ITS NOT EVEN 1% OF WHAT I USE IT FOR. THE P--- IS FUN BUT THE NOVELTY WEARS OF FAST AND WHEN I JUST WANNA J------- ILL USE MY PC OR PHONE 99% OF THE TIME. >>606129909 # >>606130430 # >>606134243 # >>606134612 # >>606134616 # >>606136594 # >>606136657 #

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Anon has family drama. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Betrayed I told you what would happen if you try to leave me 90 KB JPG 07/16/22(Sat)18:12:39 No.26913930 >find out 4 months ago that I have a brother from a past relationship of my dad, before he had me and died >I drive to meet him >we instantly understand each other so well >I am crushing hard on him >one day we have sex and from then on we have something of a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship >for 2 months it's the happiest time of my life >he doesn't come over as often and now talks about how he has a girlfriend and also drops that he eventually wants to have kids I dreaded that it would eventually come to this. I want to be happy for him, but I can't. I want him back. : Anonymous 07/16/22(Sat)18:15:42 No.26913944 >>26913930 (OP) # what the f--- thats i----- : Anonymous 07/16/22(Sat) 18:16:06 No.26913946 >>26913930 (OP) # It is what it is. : Anonymous 07/16/22(Sat) 18:29:24 No.26914003 >>26913930 (OP) # sweet home Alabamaaaaa >>26914018 # >>26914244 #

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Anon thinks he is steve rogers | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/11/22(Mon)03:10:37 No.881816785 >Be me >Commonly take walks at night >See women are scared pretty easily at this time of night >Devilishidea.mp4 >Will typically follow them for a block or two until they notice then start sprinting >Once they're on the verge of tears I run past them >Say "On your left" once I past them. Take the Steve Rogers pill, anons. It's funny.

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Anon makes fun of Alienware | /r/Greentext

James Webb Space Telescope Stores Images On A 68GB SSD James Webb Space Telescope Sto(...) 296 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: 70tiDdTb >>387154952 # 07/17/22(Sun)18:23:46 No.387148870 АНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНА >>387148870 (OP) # Virgin ssd vs chad hard disk : Anonymous (ID: q2TOXw8w) 07/17/22(Sun)18:26:40 No.387149136 >>387148870 (OP) # >$10 billion >68gb ssd who f------ built this, Alienware? >>387152291 # >>387154952 # >>387149264 # >>387150006 # >>387150150 # >>387150443 # >>387150790 >>387149206 # 07/17/22(Sun)18:27:29 No.387149206 # >>387151352 # >>387151654 # >>387151822 # >>387151985 # Kek : Anonymous (ID: nrX8FbM4 ) = 07/17/22(Sun)18:28:01 No.387149264

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Anon knows what he did this summer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 274 KB PNG 07/16/22(Sat) 15:07:17 No.69437643 why am i supposed to be enjoying this time of year again? 7 Replies : Anonymous >go get cup of water >decide to treat myself on this hot day and put some ice in >most of it melts by the time i get back to my room >take sip >swallow remaining ice 07/16/22(Sat)15:14:06 No.69437716 summer is only fun if you are a kid or college student, for adults its just hot hell. >>69437933 # View Thread : Anonymous >>69437643 (OP) # I f------ dread summer because I have to see all the other 20 year olds in friend groups and couples while I drown in loneliness 07/16/22(Sat) 15:36:58 No.69437904

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Anon's addiction | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 44 KB JPG 07/16/22(Sat) 19:16:29 No.69438782 >trying to quit soda >only had 1 soda this week >mom bought a whole case of Coca Cola and its sitting in the fridge >cant stop thinking about how good a nice, crisp, cold guzzle of coke would taste right now F--- bros, soda/sugar really is addicting as f---. I want to stop drinking it because i read studies that show that drinking soda causes brain damage and lowers testosterone and diabetes. How do I ignore this craving? It wasnt hard until this fat bitch bought a whole case but now its sitting there tempting me to drink it all

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Anon spreads misinformation in the online dating scenario | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/13/22(Sun)12:10:00 No.67763615 (36 KB, 500x500) File: artworks-000032287566-cio().jpg >>67763165 (OP) >be 6'5" barefoot >wear sneakers, now 6'6" >wear manlet inserts, now 6'8" >tell people that I am 5'11", even on dating apps I am crashing this plane with no survivors.

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Anon wasn't able to get 10 years of prior work experience for an entry level position | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: fw/ZVIAF) 06/07/21 (Mon) 07:17:11 No.37124216 >Thank you for your interest in our company, unfortunately - 53 KB PNG

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anon turned 25 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/13/22(Wed)15:39:30 No.881943984 >just turned 25 >dropped out of middle school >never had a job for longer than 6 months >depression >anxiety 76 KB JPG >psychopathy >still live with parents >never driven >poor >literally no talents or skills is it too late for me?

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