![O Anonymous 01/24/12(Tue)15:18 No. 126454520 [!]>126454864 >>126454985 >>126455075 >>126455555 File1327443484. gif-(8 KB, 645x773, 1324350713656. gif) igdb google >dad is in army >comes back from his tour of Irag >brought me a fortnight's worth of MRE's to eat >one whole week into eating nothing but MRE's, have to s--- so bad it's like an a--- apocalypse has set course for my butthole >stopped eating MRE's for a week, been over 120 hours since I last s--- >mother and father are concerned >l ask for laxatives, I desperately need them at this point >dad goes out and buys me an enema >so f------ p-----, don't understand how to use it >decide it's time >go into the big family bathroom, lock the door >sit down, spread my cheeks with my hands and push >it's not coming out >it's like a f------ Howitzer shell trapped between the headspace of a plumbing pipe already sewn shut with fecal matter >this becomes a life or death situation >begin clawing my butthole apart in a desperate attempt to break the massive turd into segments >at this point my a------ has stretched to the size of a pickle jar lid, the turd has still not met its time to come >my hands are soon covered in blood, shed from my virgin a------ >l begin crying and swearing at the enormous turd stuck in my ass >SUDDENLY >almost as if though a dam has burst >my anus literally turns into a wormhole bringing forth a cacophony of Lovecraftian horrors from beyond the veil of human understanding >with the force of ten million explosions, what could only be described as warm, liquid bloody fecal matter sprays all over my hands, legs, toilet and back >l lie devastated in a pool of liquid s--- with the bathroom door locked >the smell is unbearable >dad literally kicks down the door and drags me out >hospitalized for almost half a month due to my ass left in unrecognizable condition >spend my time shellshocked, feeling like a victim of the most violent r--- ever known to man And that is why I haven't touched an MRE in three years.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/128/795/045.png "Anon eats MREs | /r/Greentext")
Anon eats MREs | /r/Greentext
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![The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/list/002/946/856/9f0.jpeg "Anon is hopeful | /r/Greentext")
Uploaded by Reddit Moments Jun 20, 2021 at 04:23AM EDT
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![File: 2FC55D7E-3CE5-4C4E-9A68-F1810951C310.jpg (558 KB, 1920x800) O Itv/ Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)22:46:56 No.152468803 [Reply] >Look at that subtle off-gold colouring. The tasteful thickness of it. Oh Eru, it even has an inscription. >> Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)23:12:08 No.152469645 File: 1601794079080.png (554 KB, 750x314) >Aragorn, it's Boromir. You're my brother, my captain and my king so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some Uruk-Hai in Amon Hen uptown uh, some orcs, maybe 5 or 10, um, a goblin I ran into in the Mines of Moria. I left him in a pile of rubble behind some dwarf's grave. I killed another goblin with an axe, I had to, he almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a hobbit, but he's dead too. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure l'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess, I guess l'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, I may show up at Minas Tirith, so you know, keep your eyes open.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/128/571/c5d.png "The Gondorian Psycho | /r/Greentext")
