Anon Didn't Expect Wonderful Things From the Wizard of Oz | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

34 KB JPG >be me >9 years old >watching Wizard of Oz with dad >dad super hyped, loves the movie >I'm vibing, good times >"We're off to see the wizard..." part comes on >hear "Because, because, because, because, becaaaaaause... >Because of the wonderful PIXIE DUST!" >Pixie dust??? YES. HYPE. >Excited for pixie dust rest of the movie >whole time waiting for magical sparkles >movie ends, no pixie dust anywhere >devastated >start crying, literally thought I was lied to by gang >dad doesn't understand why son is crying >increase_crying_intensity = 100 >fart a little during peak scream >dad gives me "fml" look >didn't realize they said "THINGS HE DOES" until college >mfw_no_pixie_dust.png

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Right through my heart | /r/Greentext

Anonymous who is at fault here 713 KB JPG は 10/23/24(Wed)19:59:54 No.79223520 >arrive to get blood work done, super nervous >trying to avoid eye contact and say as little as possible >sit down and roll up my sleeve for her >"you have nice veins" >immediately need to focus on not getting hard on the spot >"got any plans for later today?" n-not really >also talks about how she likes my shirt a lot >I'm so stunned that I'm mindlessly staring at the place she's about to draw blood from until I realize it and look away, even more embarrassed for this was she acting aggressive, or was that nothing at all and I'm just pathetic. weird thing is she didn't make a comment about my hair and that's what everyone mentions if they want to make small talk with me, I was definitely caught off guard

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Anon found a money glitch | /r/Greentext

Anonymous lunch 2 MB GIF 05/11/24(Sat) 10:07:00 No.77456803 random childhood memory unlocked >be me 15 years ago, bored >decide to sell my toys to neighborhood kids >one kid buys a toy truck for one dollar >he leaves truck in his yard during >sneak in and steal truck back >no idea why I did it, just a sudden impulse >that afternoon he comes back and says the truck was stolen >tell him that sucks, I only have one left, since it's my last one it will be three dollars if he wants it >he buys the truck again This was buried deep in the back of my brain. Do I need to check my ancestry?

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We could have it all | /r/Greentext

Anonymous him 417 KB PNG 10/23/24(Wed) 09:58:19 No.79219762 >be my boyfriend >virgin >angry incel on here, hated women for not giving him love >i become his gf >i shower him with love and attention 24/7 >i make huge money sacrifices for >he loses his virginity with me >i buy clothes he likes so he can find me more attractive >i do everything to keep things calm and nice >he treats me like s--- and ignores me for days and acts as if im the toxic one >he says he would rather be single >he says i suffocate him too much when the only time we spend together is me and him on a call, with me muted, watching him play videogames or simply listening to his breathing >im visiting him in 18 days for a month 1. how do i make him love me and give a s--- about me like he used to? 2. what if he just keeps treating me like s--- once im there and ignores me and leaves me to fend for myself in an unknown country? 3. why is he treating me this way in the first place?

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Anon wants to be a horny witcher | /r/Greentext

Anonymous The Witcher 1 1.33 MB PNG 10/23/24(Wed)13:44:30 No.692652951 >give wolfskin to prove you are a worthy hunter >get rewarded with sex Times were simple back in the days as a witcher.

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I wonder what Anon did tho | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I was stupid. cp shold 1.3 MB PNG back. my life is a joke 3 Replies 10/23/24(Wed)16:28:38 No.79220258 >Be paranoid schizo >Start to suspect everyone at work hates me. >Don't have any reason to believe that, just go on vibes, so I think it's just my paranoia acting up. >Got fired because three coworkers I trusted the most conspired against me and stabbed me in the View Thread

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I'll eat you alive | /r/Greentext

Anonymous IT'S JOEVER 25 KB JPG 10/22/24(Tue)19:50:17 No.79212871 >have massive crush on friend >notice she likes a lot of memes about getting eaten out on socials >leaving town for good soon, will never see her again >shoot my shot >"lol I don't even remember liking those" >leave a serious offer on the table >"that's generous but that's not something I'm looking for right now" Just call me ugly already, f---.

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Anon tries Detroit style pizza | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 6 KB JPG 10/23/24(Wed)03:45:42 No.926384596 >be me >Go to pizza place I haven't seen before >They've got Detroit style which I've never had >Order a full one that runs me like 35 bucks but, ah well >Mfw they bring it out and that sucker is crispy ASF with lots of cheese and sauce on top >Also mfw I take my first bite and feel that slight crunch Have you taken the Detroit style pizza-pill yet anon?

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Anon studies the American Civil War | /r/Greentext

File: download (9).jpg (172 KB, 1200x675) Confederates: Anonymous 10/22/24(Tue)13:29:44 No.17198166 ►>>17198710>>17199097 Union: >Conceive of a brilliant strategic plan to capture a hill >Execute it in the most retarded way possible >Lose half the army in failed Human wave attacks >Occupy the hill after Rebs run out of ammo >Claim victory because the value of the hill outweighs the thousands of men who died for it >Hill is retaken an hour later by Confederate cavalry >Conceive of the dumbest, most idiotic failed abortion of a plan ever put to paper to hold a hill >Tactical execution is flawless >Mow down wave after wave of Yankees >Run out of ammo, cannons melt, withdraw while taking shots from the rear >Claim victory because bluebellies fail to take the pig farm 0.4 miles from the hill >Half the army dies of starvation the next day

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This might soon be a reality | /r/Greentext

Dontos XBOXONE XBOX ONE >still feeling sick from the 14 Anonymous (ID: Gd4zYaQ7) 06/16/13(Sun)10:50:56 No.487373351 Repl >2018 >wake up feeling sick after a late night of playing vidya >excited to play some halo 2k19 >"xbox on" >"XBOX ON" >"Please verify that you are "annon332" by saying "Doritos™ Dew™ it right!" >"Doritos™ Dew™ it right" >"ERROR! Please drink a verification can" >reach into my Doritos ™ Mountain Dew™ Halo 2k19™ War Chest >only a few cans left, needed to verify 14 times last night >force it down and grumble out "mmmm that really hit the spot" >xbox does nothing >i attempt to smile >"Connecting to verification server" >... >"Verification complete!" >finally >boot up halo 2k19 >finding multiplayer match... >"ERROR! User attempting to steal online gameplay!" >my mother just walked in the room >"Adding another user to your pass, this will be charged to your credit card. Do you accept?" >"NO!" >"Console entering lock state!" >"to unlock drink verification can" >last can >"WARNING, OUT OF VERIFICATION CANS, an order has been shipped and charged to your credit card" >drink half the can, oh god im going to be sick >pour the last half out the window >"PIRACY DETECTED! PLEASE COMPLETE THIS ADVERTISEMENT TO CONTINUE" >the mountain dew ad plays >i have to dance for it >feeling so sick >makes me sing along >dancing and singing >"mountain dew is for me and you" >throw up on my self >throw up on my tv and entertainment system >router shorts >"ERROR NO CONNECTION! XBOX SHUTTING OFF" >"PLEASE DRINK VERIFICATION CAN TO CONTINUE"

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Diarrhœa Alley | /r/Greentext

File: 1687692190539191.jpg (292 KB, 1447x1437) Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)18:19:26 No.204711963 >>204711996 >>204712016 >>204712023 >>204712471 >>204712588 >>204712621 >>204712690 >>204713285 >>204714024 >>204714067 >>204714090 >>204715044 >> >Indian Harry Potter >he smells so bad that he kills Voldemort on the spot Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon) 18:20:43 No.204711996 ► >>204711963 (OP) >wizards magic away their poop It all makes sense, thanks JK. Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon) 18:41:11 No.204712400 >>204712429 >>204712439 >>204712471 >>204712484 >>204712493 >>204712550 >>204712727 >>204713326 >>204713986 >>204714046 >>204714087 >>204715006 >Indian Harry Potter >gets hit by the Hogwarts Express Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)18:50:40 No.204712588 ►>>204712712>>204715035 >>204711963 (OP) >Harry Pooter and the Brahmin's stone >Harry Pooter and the chamber pot of secrets >Harry Pooter and the britisher of azkaban >Harry Pooter and the curry of fire >Harry Pooter and order of the google card >Harry Pooter and the half caste prince >Harry Pooter and the deathly s---- Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)18:55:07 No.204712690 ►>>204713300 >>204711963 (OP). >Salazar Sirtherin created a monster specifically so nobody would ever use the toilets >> Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)19:48:29 No.204713566 File: IMG_1125.png (211 KB, 558x455) >RANJESH POTTER, DID YOU S--- IN THE STREET OF FIRE?!?! >FILCH HAS BEEN TRYING TO EXCAVATE MRS NORRIS FOR THE LAST TEN HOURS! Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)20:11:32 No.204713903 >>204713933 >It's levioSAR, not leviosir

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Anon's dad teaches him a lesson | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 19 KB JPG 10/22/24(Tue)14:53:24 No.926356507 >be me on my birthday in 2012 >Go to school >Get bullied like crazy as usual >Get home with tears in eyes >Tell dad >Dad says "toughen up buttercup" and gives me a kiss on the forehead My dad passed away last night, just figured I'd share one of my favorite memories

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Pattern Recognition and Dark Skinned Women in a New World! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/13/24(Mon) 13:02:48 No.266540951 >I obtained the cheat skill [Pattern Recognition] and got kicked from the Hero's Party for antisemitism, so now i'm going to live a slow life preparing for the inevitable race-war, but these brown girls keep trying to seduce me?!? >>266541408 # >>266541926 # >>266542088 # >>266542249 # >>266542556 # >>266544046 # >>266544380 #

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