Diarrhœa Alley | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

File: 1687692190539191.jpg (292 KB, 1447x1437) Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)18:19:26 No.204711963 >>204711996 >>204712016 >>204712023 >>204712471 >>204712588 >>204712621 >>204712690 >>204713285 >>204714024 >>204714067 >>204714090 >>204715044 >> >Indian Harry Potter >he smells so bad that he kills Voldemort on the spot Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon) 18:20:43 No.204711996 ► >>204711963 (OP) >wizards magic away their poop It all makes sense, thanks JK. Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon) 18:41:11 No.204712400 >>204712429 >>204712439 >>204712471 >>204712484 >>204712493 >>204712550 >>204712727 >>204713326 >>204713986 >>204714046 >>204714087 >>204715006 >Indian Harry Potter >gets hit by the Hogwarts Express Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)18:50:40 No.204712588 ►>>204712712>>204715035 >>204711963 (OP) >Harry Pooter and the Brahmin's stone >Harry Pooter and the chamber pot of secrets >Harry Pooter and the britisher of azkaban >Harry Pooter and the curry of fire >Harry Pooter and order of the google card >Harry Pooter and the half caste prince >Harry Pooter and the deathly s---- Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)18:55:07 No.204712690 ►>>204713300 >>204711963 (OP). >Salazar Sirtherin created a monster specifically so nobody would ever use the toilets >> Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)19:48:29 No.204713566 File: IMG_1125.png (211 KB, 558x455) >RANJESH POTTER, DID YOU S--- IN THE STREET OF FIRE?!?! >FILCH HAS BEEN TRYING TO EXCAVATE MRS NORRIS FOR THE LAST TEN HOURS! Anonymous 10/21/24(Mon)20:11:32 No.204713903 >>204713933 >It's levioSAR, not leviosir

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon's dad teaches him a lesson | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 19 KB JPG 10/22/24(Tue)14:53:24 No.926356507 >be me on my birthday in 2012 >Go to school >Get bullied like crazy as usual >Get home with tears in eyes >Tell dad >Dad says "toughen up buttercup" and gives me a kiss on the forehead My dad passed away last night, just figured I'd share one of my favorite memories

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Pattern Recognition and Dark Skinned Women in a New World! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/13/24(Mon) 13:02:48 No.266540951 >I obtained the cheat skill [Pattern Recognition] and got kicked from the Hero's Party for antisemitism, so now i'm going to live a slow life preparing for the inevitable race-war, but these brown girls keep trying to seduce me?!? >>266541408 # >>266541926 # >>266542088 # >>266542249 # >>266542556 # >>266544046 # >>266544380 #

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Lost in translation | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 24 KB JPG 10/22/24(Tue)23:59:57 No.79215146 >be me >crossing the street to arrive at the bus stop and return home >a girl was waiting at the bus as well >around 13 yo beautiful peruvian girl >half purple half brown hair, anime t- shirt >like picrel >and we make visual contact >she starts to get really shy, like a tomato >instantly feel in love with her >i place myself behind her in the line >can't stop looking at her >she starts to turn around quickly to see me, only to turn around again and gets nervous >she is so cute >slowly approach closer to her >she starts to get super nervous >im happy >shes happy >we are in love >this stays for a couple of seconds >don't have the courage to talk to her This was the only opportunity I had to have a gf and I missed. I feel miserable. She was perfect.

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Remember me | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Girlfriend did p--- 161 KB JPG 10/23/24(Wed)01:14:35 No.79215931 >be me >studying master's degree >25 KHHV >See super cute girl that looks oddly familiar >Talk to her, become friends, ask her out >she says yes >date for months, happiest time of my life >no longer KHHV >I love this girl, she's very sweet and doesn't mind my slight 'tism >she is incredibly attractive an 8 or 9 and very fit with great body >Can't get the idea that i had seen her somewhere before out of my head >go digging >yup, she did p--- >She probably needed money during her undergrad >video is on the hub, it's one of those "teen first time doing p---" videos >several million views >she sucked d--- and was f----- raw then facial >feel complete and utter disgust, sick to my core >vomit and cry That was yesterday night. Today went to class and hung out with her for a bit. I could barely look her in the face. Told her I was tired and went home. I hate p---. I hate this so much. I can't get it out of my head. Everytime i think about her or see her all i can imagine is the s--- i saw in that video. I know I have to break up with her and there is no point in talking about it. But she has been very kind to me and I don't want to be alone again.

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Anon Dislikes Weevils | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/10/1776(Sat) 12:52:03 No.04191775 36 MB JPG >Be me, Continental Soldier in 1776 >Sergeant asks me to check the ships biscuit for weevils >LookInside.jpg >Weevils >Any other continentalpilled anons have this problem?

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It's like one of my Japanese animes | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/22/17(Sun)22:57:38 No.35580872 >>35580130 # Because the airforce is the closest thing we have to a mecha anime irl. Think about it. >brave hero pilots going off to war in 64 KB JPG extravagant multibillion dollar machines >technology out the ass >massive support team dedicated solely to sucking the pilot's d--- >literally like 100 non pilots for every pilot >techno cyberpunk nonsense filled cockpit >crazy f------ "look at that guy and kill him" style war machines >can't take out the crazy f------ war machines too often because the [animation] bill is too large >when combat does come it lasts for 5 minutes and is the most spectacular thing in the world >immediately after it's right back to stupid minor social problems at the airbase The airforce is literally Gundam but somehow more gay.

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Anon Hates Comment Sections | /r/Greentext

Ea9tLo7WoAEFKK-.jpg 119 KB JPG >Watch video >Go to comment section >Every comment: "Bro (describes what person did) *skull emoji*" F------ NPCs, I swear...

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Arctic Convoy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed)19:03:45 No.31633803 MV5BYThmZTVjZjYtNzYwYS00OWI4LTliYmUtZDE2ZGY4YTM5NTI2XkEyX 24 KB JPG >been dating this person for a few months >Booked a 20 days vacation with her to south Europe >Planned it and picked the activities together >Everything was all good until last week end, never had any argument or any f--- up from my part >Got a message last night telling me she didnt feel sure she wanted to keep up with the relationship and was having second thoughts on spending summer with me What now? Do I still go alone? : Anonymous >>31633803 (OP) # 07/17/24(Wed)19:06:10 No.31633813 Hope you learned your lessons OP. And yeah, go alone unless your tickets are transferrable >>31634105 #

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Hogwarts: Where everything is made up and the points don't matter. | /r/Greentext

☐ Anonymous 10/22/24(Tue)18:01:41 No.204742572 >>204742652 >>204743944 >>204744896 >>204745679 File: 1729580365480.png (1.25 MB, 1500x768) >OH AND ONE MORE SET OF POINTS TO ADD >FOR BEING A HOUSE OF PEOPLE THAT IDOLISE MURDERERS, RAPISTS AND AN EVIL LORD.... I AWARD SLYTHERIN WITH AS MANY POINTS AS JEWS DIED IN THE HOLOCAUST >*slytherin erupts Into thunderous applause* >Dumbledore looks directly to the camera >"ZERO POINTS". >> Anonymous 10/22/24(Tue)18:07:33 No.204742661 ►>>204742674 File: Screenshot 2024-10-22 at (...).png (1.8 MB, 914x1168) >>204742470 (OP) >Honestly lol, You guys r gonna fly around on brooms, they're gasoline powered advanced tech made in area 51, magic isn't real u f------ retards I'm an alien LMAO. Whatever, I'm f------ drunk, 1000 points to GRIFFINDOR, F--- U slytherian KEK F------, ROFL u think I'd let you win dumb f------ bitches. Harry... meet me in the dungeon below, you already know to put on lipstick u f------ twink. Anonymous 10/22/24(Tue)18:08:33 No.204742674 >>204742661 >Dumbledore said calmly. ☐ Anonymous 10/22/24(Tue)21:52:39 No.204745657 File: tomriddle.jpg (85 KB, 270x387) G >Tom Riddle: I was in the library the other day, in the Restricted Section, and I read something rather odd about a Muggle man and his struggle. It's called, as I understand it... Lebensraum. >Slughorn: I beg your pardon? >Tom: Lebensraum. I came across the term while reading and I didn't fully understand it. >Slughorn: I'm not sure what you were reading, Tom, but this is very dark stuff. Very dark indeed. >Tom: Which is why I came to you. >Slughorn: Lebensraum means "living space," or "breathing room." >Tom: But what exactly does that entail, Sir? >Slughorn: Conquered land gets depopulated and then colonized by the conquerors. >Tom: Depopulated? >Slughorn: One way or the other, the native populations are removed. >Tom: And how does one depopulate the entirety of Eastern Europe, Sir? >Slughorn: I think you already know the answer to that, Tom... >Tom: Genocide. >Slughorn: Merlin's beard, Tom... this is all hypothetical, isn't it Tom? All academic??? >Tom: Of course, Sir. It'll be our little secret. ☐ Anonymous 10/22/24(Tue)22:10:25 No.204745936 File: sorting.png (123 KB, 800x360) >Male!

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The lost decade | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/11/24(Fri)16:31:36 No.204397416 flat,750x,075,f-pad,750x1000,f8f8f8~2.jpg 144 KB JPG >80s movie >everything is a big party, everyone's singing and dancing, everyone has a saxophone, everyone's having the time of their lives What the f--- happened? Don't say 9/11 because I've had enough of cliches

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The Degenerate Problem | /r/Greentext

File: 1330151807.jpg-(141 KB, 1280x720, 1279219969258.jpg) Anonymous 02/25/12(Sat)01:36 No.61895228 Lets play the Japanese animal noise game /a/, I'll start! Cats go 'nyaa nyaa... Anonymous 02/25/12(Sat)01:38 No.61895297 File: 1330151915.jpg-(11 KB, 400x225, Ninaalexander.jpg) The dog goes "da...ddy" Anonymous 02/25/12(Sat)01:39 No.61895359 File: 1330151992.jpg-(67 KB, 367x341, 1327688312375.jpg) >>61895297 Anonymous 02/25/12(Sat)01:42 No.61895437 File: 1330152137.jpg-(11 KB, 251x251, 1329541721858.jpg) No >>61895297 I won't deal with it Anonymous 02/25/12(Sat)01:43 No.61895470 File: 1330152197.jpg-(7 KB, 255x194, 1329965145806.jpg) >>61895297 too far

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Anon exercises self-control. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/25/18(Sun)21:40:59 No.45304389 I've made a rule for myself I've got a loaded 9mm next to my bed If I have an orgasm then I'll have to kill myself Therefore I don't j------- and remain celibate. Most of the discipline comes from working out twice a day while also repeatedly telling myself I can offer nothing to a woman and I will never deserve any pleasure from a girl. So far it's working and i haven't come in two months and have convinced myself that I'm repulsive until I reach near perfect aesthetics. Life is hell >>45304452 # >>45304903 # >>45304909 # >>45309098 # >>45309846 >>45311350 # >>45311496 #

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