Anon Becomes a Chef | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

455 KB PNG >be me, p--- addict >masturbate 5-6 times a day >one day out of nowhere get flooded with memories of the Papa Louie Games >Nostalgia kicks in, begin playing Papa's Wingeria >get obsessed with the game >don't have time to j------- Papa Louie cured my p--- addiction

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon claims to work for online journal that plans to cancel Smiling Friends | /r/Greentext

File: SmilingFriends.png (469 KB, 1175x1763) SMILING FRIENDS SMILING FRIENDS HITPIECE INCOMING Anonymous 06/16/24(Sun)11:58:53 No.200161332 ►>>200161379 >>200161446 I can't tell you who I am, y'all will have to just trust me. But I have connections with a noteworthy online entertainment publication. They're currently writing on a hitpiece that's attacking the creators of Smiling Friends for being problematic. >Most of the piece will be going after Zach Hadel aka psychicpebbles for connections to the alt-right >Will post old clips of him from Sleepycast and OneyPlays saying jokes perceived as bigoted. >Will go after Zach for his connections to Shadman (article calls him an artist of drawn cp) and animator-turned-NeoNazi Emily Youcis (Article says these are old friends of Zach). >The article has quotes from Arin Hanson aka Egoraptor, where he says he stopped being friends with Zach because he refused to "grow out" of his edgy phase. >Goes after the creators for including Doug Walker in the show even though he was cancelled for the whole #ChangetheChannel controversy. >Will also go after Chris O'Neill aka Oney for criticizing the BLM movement (He works on the show so he's an acceptable target). >Call them out for still being friends with Jontron even after the racist rant. >Will call 2000's Newgrounds an incubator of the current day online alt-right, and the show is from that "online cesspool". I believe there's even more than that. But it's coming out soon, I believe by the Season 2 finale or right after it.

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Anon the scam caller | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: N5Ut4cMb 06/03/24(Mon)11:23:14 No.470041797 >singlehandedly turned the entire Indian subcontinent into an international laughing stock How did he do it? Anonymous (ID: mvVT8/M/ ) ♥ >>470041797 (OP) # 06/03/24(Mon)11:24:27 No.470041905 >How did he do it? All he's done is show everyone the truth. That's all. >>470042718 # >>470043148 # >>470046713 #

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Anon is disciplined | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG 06/15/24(Sat)23:40:56 No.31451466 >waking up early >sun exposure >cold shower >water, coffee, and milk only >heavy reading >lifting, running, calisthenics, swimming (some kind of physical activity) >balanced diet with good intake of protein >no p--- >8-9 hours of sleep what else?

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Anon has the best sex ever. | /r/Greentext

File: 23744b4fa074f1d1396079019(...).jpg (15 KB, 236x236) after you've done something too freaky and you tryna figure out what you've become. >moaning >im getting close >close my eyes and pick up the pace >d--- is beyond dimonds >hold back as long as i can >her back arches suddenly >her breathing speeds up >she quivers all allong her body >p---- gets tighter >OHSHIT >blow huge load inside her >best sex we had had yet >I pull out >tell her it was amazing >shes still in doggy position >still breathing heavy >still quivering >still... still foaming at the mouth...? >mfw my gf has severe epilepsy Anonymous 08/16/16(Tue)00:01:44 No. 699638321 Got a story i thought i'd tell >>699639634 >>699640965 >>699642763 >>699643010 also ITT: stuff you have done which made you take 2 showers after >Had 6.5/10 gf when in uni >Her favorite position is doggy >do it all the time >back at mine one evening >going at it >switch to doggy feelsgood.exe >my fav position too >usually difficult to get my gf to orgasm quickly >often takes a good 30-40 mins of 4play to get her anywhere near ready >but she seems to be enjoying my D alot tonight >pulling at sheets >mfw i just blew my load inside her unconsious seizing body >mfw it was the best sex we ever had

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anon is a youtube debunker | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Kyle Hill W--? 375 KB PNG 6/16/2024, 2:34:40 PM > Be Kyle Hill - Youtube debunker No.84741978 > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGL8WLI- yFw&t=4802s > "actionable" claims (questionable) repeated 12x > "consummation" of momentum (conservation) > "inside" into (insight) > claims a masters in science "communication" with honors > Is he just retarded?

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Anon likes Star Trek | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 300 KB JPG Nine (DS9) 06/02/24(Sun)17:10:12 No. 199730408 >Captain Ben Sisko >Huge fan of Star Trek >Shows a future utopia for humans >The planet Earth is a paradise >No poverty or hunger >No racism or crude racial stereotypes >Favorite show is Deep Space >Brave, intelligent and compassionate >One of the first black captains with serious screen time shown on Star Trek >Final episode, Sisko saves the Alpha Quadrant... >Immediately abandons his son and pregnant wife The DS9 writers just couldnt give a black man a win

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Anon has a slight misunderstanding | /r/Greentext

Anonymous banned on reddit 06/16/24(Sun)05:33:05 No.77851583 >make post on r/r--- >get banned in under half an hour >didn't know it was for the victims 06/16/24(Sun)06:12:15 No.77851772 40 KB JPG Anonymous >>77851583 (OP) see you on reddit put me in the screen cap

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Well, that's not a very good school. | /r/Greentext

35 KB JPG >babysitting nephew >11 years old >he's doing remote school >watch in for a bit >teacher is like 15 minutes late >she's obviously high or hungover, is barely able to slur words that were written before, looks like she just woke up and is still in a t-shirt and sweatpants. >after a few minutes of listening nephew just puts on his headphones and starts playing minecraft

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GOOD O'L CHARLES | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/03/24(Mon)00:06:05 No.143914759 AUGH! its football charlie brown.png >>143912649 # 182 KB PNG >OI, CHARLEY BROWNE, WHY DONTCHA COMM 'ERE AN KEEK DIS 'ERE FUTBOLL, GUV? OOE, YA CHEEKY C---, YA JUS' GONNA WEIT FUH ME TA COMM RUNNIN' UP TA KEEK EET AN DEN POLL ET AWAYS! >NAH, GUVNAH, DIS THYME YA CAN' TRUS' ME! SEE - ERE'S ME FUTBOLL LOISCENCE, PROMISIN' NOTS TA POLL IT AWAYS! CORR BLIMEY! ITTIS SOIGNED! ISSA SOIGNED DOCUMEN, DAT IS! DIS THYME O'IM REALLY GONNA PUNT DAT BOLL WUT! >... AAAAUUUGGGHHH! YA RITE C---!!

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Pussy envy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 it's become a prawnblem 66 KB JPG 06/15/24(Sat)09:18:38 No.36178907 >be me >cis man >19 years old now >successful smart and attractive >women ask me out all the time >have a dark secret >really want to have a p---- >can't help but imagine myself getting fingered when having sex >sometimes do an autistic grind move when having sex >because it's what someone with a p---- would do or something >one day when having sex get touched where p---- should be >cummingropes.jpg >now she's mad for e---------- too quickly >have a mental breakdown and tell her it's because she "touched my p----" >now she thinks I'm insane >and a t----- probably

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What did she mean by this? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/13/24(Mon)03:55:16 No. 199103736 Game-of-Thrones.jpg 30 KB JPG >OH NO, THE MAN I CONSENTED TO MARRYING WANTS TO CONSUMMATE OUR MARRIAGE! >AAAAAAAAAAAUGH I'M GETTING R----, SAVE ME THEONMAN!

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Anon achieved happiness(?) | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 480 KB PNG 06/14/24(Fri)19:27:36 No.77828587 >gave back my sports car/city apartment >moved to middle of b------ nowhere with an old pickup Well why would you do that anon? You might ask >get hungry - no supermarket for a hundred miles Read that stinging nettles make a good spinach substitute so I try it >ohmygod.jpg Delicious >go nettle gathering >see deer >pull out my slow manual reload rifle >kill deer and gut it. Well I have no money what do I do? >make online business so I am not registered as a welfare milking POS At this point I made my own well for water, live 30 miles away from ANY human contact >Regularly drive into town to drink at a bar. >sell deer and other self grown stuff/wool from sheeps I bought. Fast forward 10 years, sitting on my porch, watching my cattle/sheeps while petting my dog and eating bread from my own production. I may not have a girl/money or massive wealth. But I am peaceful. Take the rural pill anons. 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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