Anon and office double standards | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1765434598764.jpg, 64KIB, 711x718 Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2020 13:27:24 No.59011713 View Report happened last year, but i'll greentext it >be me, work at a big tech company >leftist ultra-woke usual corporate nonsense etc >i'm 6'2 and lifting for 2.5 years, working up to 2/3/4/5 >wear polo shirts to work bc comfy and collared/professional, downside is everyone can see my physique >i outright refuse to talk about weightlifting/fitness to my coworkers to avoid becoming a stereotype >always change the subject, or say "yeah I used to lift in the past but not anymore" >but I'm obviously very muscular, especially by normie standards >normie standards are so f-----, they think I'm mr olympia while to me I'm a work in progress >i can always feel the unspoken resentment from other ppl tho >thotty summer interns and vendor sales hoes always approach me, plenty of mires >some fat girl on a team adjacent to mine always making weird fitness jokes at my expense >not a landwhale (yet) but extremely overweight, massive feminist, white BLM activist >approaching the wall at warp speed and secretly knows it (they all do) >theres a disagreement on how to use engineering resources >"hey, I'll bet anon over there probably wants to settle the debate by arm wrestling lol" >constant weird annoying comments like that >one day i get to a meeting 5 minutes late bc i had to walk across two buildings to get there >"well well nice of you to join us there protein shake" >enough >"well I'm here now, sorry I'm late McFlurry" > room with a dozen people in it falls silent >everyone staring at me like i just murdered a child or something >literally 15 seconds of silence >fatty is in shock, doesn't say anything for the entire meeting >next day >manager requests a 10am meeting >walk into the room, its him and 2 HR people >assigned 4 weeks of sensitivity training >online courses on diversity in the workplace >mfw around fats never relax

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon isn't able to enjoy the moment | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 26 KB JPEG 15/06/2024, 00:08:01 > be me > play with my kitten No.33197999 > he's 6 month old and he's the sweetest thing ever > I finally feel loved and accepted and I would anything for him > I start crying because I think he will die much before me and I will miss this moments Why am I like this?

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Anon wants to be a scientist | /r/Greentext

File: 07C1A246-9526-4961-A187-0(...).jpg (111 KB, 1278x1230) Aptilink + Aptilink https://aptilink.io/results/basic?session_id=cs_live_a1t5G4mqSZZ... Services ▾ Learn More v Contact Results Your IQ is 80 9.12% 50 75 100 125 150 Highcharts.com Your IQ is in the top 90.88% In a room of 1000 people you would be smarter than C 91 of them. >>15413000 >>15413046 >>15413114 >>15413135 >>15413220 Anonymous 05/03/23(Wed)05:12:34 No.15412971 >>15413411 >>15413454 What field of science should I get into with an IQ of 80? Anonymous 05/03/23(Wed)05:26:37 No.15413000 >>15412971 (OP) lab animal

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Average Grimdank User | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)07:53:07 No.57865060 >>57865260 >>57868884 935f8f99-ff97-4555-b052-0(...).jpg (64 KB, 1200x680) google yandex iqdb wait >>57864873 >if you never talk to them I did, once. Anonymous Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)08:08:41 No.57865260 >>57865615 >>57865060 Story time? Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)08:38:00 No.57865615 >>57866150 >>57866188 >>57866207 >>57866731 >>57868110 >>57868246 >>57868884 the-boys-homelander.jpg (230 KB, 2028x1140) google yandex iqdb wait >>57865260 Sure. >be me >start lifting right when the gym opens up >completely empty most of the time >electronic access so don't have to deal with the bitch at the reception >strange but comfy feeling >liminalspacesafterdark.jpg >about a month in this HUGE roidfag shows up >120+ kg not a gramm of fat on him >whatever there's more than enough benches for the both of us >about halfway through my last set I hear bloodcurdling screams from the other side of the freeweight area >"W-----! WHY DID YOU BETRAY EVERYONE?! WHY?! AAAAAAHH! W-----!" >look over >see roidfag benching with his headphones in while screaming his head of >quickly finish my set and leave >this continues for weeks >6 days a week, 4 weeks a month >every single time things get rough for him on the bench "W-----! WHY DAMN YOU?! WHOOOOOOORES!" >one day work up the nerve to tell him to keep it down with the incel s--- since I can hear him through my NOISECANCELLING HEADPHONES >says he isn't screaming "w-----" but "Horus", a guy who "betrayed him and his kin" >ask him what the f--- he means by "his kin" >he rolls up his sleeve to reveal the gayest shoulder tattoo I've ever seen >looks like a tear with angel wings >wakemeupinside.jpg >says he's part of the "blood warriors" or some s--- like that >never heard of a gang by that name in the area >he apparently interprets my looks of bewilderment as a sign of interest and goes on the most autistic rant I've heard in my f------ life Cont? Anonymous Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)09:18:47 No.57866150 >>57866638 >>57865615 unreasonably based Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)09:22:00 No.57866188 >>57866638 >>57865615 Please continue man this is great Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)09:23:38 No.57866205 >>57864526 BIG DOGS GOTTA EAT Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)09:23:44 No.57866207 >>57866638 >>57865615 Please continue Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)09:59:29 No.57866638 >>57866683 >>57866731 >>57866842 >>57866953 >>57867181 >>57867747 >>57868072 >>57868110 >>57868246 >>57868256 >>57868884 1602447378286.jpg (117 KB, 553x544) google yandex iqdb wait >>57866150 >>57866188 >>57866207 Cont. >says he can lift heavier by channeling his "black rage" >I stare even harder >the guy is super white >like born in Eastern Europe and has never seen the sun white >is this mf like a reverse black klansman or something? >he notices my eyeballs coming out of my skull and eleborates >apparently Horus isn't a real guy, he's the bad guy from some kind of niche fantasy franchise he subscribes too >so are the blood warriors >he then proceeds to relate to me some of the weirdest s--- I've heard in a long time >I mean I was into some autistic s--- in my time but BOI >thousands of years into the future >humanity built a galaxy spanning empire but somehow reverted back to an absolute monarchy in the process >everything is led by a single guy who is a huge fedora tipping atheist, but also technically himself a god >also he's in a coma and needs to eat a thousand witches every single day to stay alive >instead of using warp drives like in star trek they open up portals to hell, cover the (somehow shorter) distance IN HELL and break back into reality >speaking of hell there's demons in this universe, also aliens, also witches, also cyborgs >to deal with all that s--- they brought back the communist commisariat and - I kid you not - the Spanish Inquisition >I just keep staring and smiling politely for fear of him killing me in an autistic fit of rage if I shut him up >the f----- won't. stop. talking. >I finally loose my patience when he tells me about this alien race that's like LOTR elves except their magic is powered EXCLUSIVELY BY R--- >not by sex like in some ancient vitality based nature religion >no it HAS to be r--- or their t----- god won't be satisfied >mumble something non commital about being late for work and gtfo >he yells after me about how we should talk more and how it's super hard to find someone who's interested in that s--- >can'timaginewhy.jpg Anonymous 10/12/20(Mon)10:01:55 No.57866683 >>57866731 >>57868006 >>57868246 >>57868884 3ajtl3-1.jpg (32 KB, 640x360) google yandex iqdb wait >>57866638 >stay home and do calisthenics for two weeks >buy some better headphones >he's still there every morning >to this day he's still screaming about Horus and how he betrayed him >thankfully he never talked to me again >the new headphones drown him out, mostly Yeah, f--- talking to randos at the gym.

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Anons always getting suprisingly retarded | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >>199628 06/01/24(Sat) 11:44:25 No. 199634 >would you allow you're gf to go to bjj classes knowing what you know about how men behave? No Women doing martial arts is cope and cringe

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Post nut clarity had hit anon hard | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: K8PMe4WS) + 133 KB PNG 06/14/24(Fri)21:49:06 No.471131235 >THE BANKS ARE COLLAPSING >THE YIELDS ARE SPIKING >THE PETRODOLLARS ARE DYING >THE BONDS ARE DEFAULTING >THE MONEYS ARE INFLATING >THE FAMINES ARE COMING >THE MARKETS ARE CRASHING >THE JOBS ARE RECEEDING >THE DEBTS ARE PILING UP >THE CYBERCRIMINALS ARE HACKING >THE BLACKOUTS ARE COMING >THE WORLD WARS ARE STARTING >THE WEST HAS FALLEN It's over but I still have to go to work Monday morning. I'm tired bros, I'm tired of this world. When will it be my turn to be on top?

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/fit/izen tries nofap straight to ED | /r/Greentext

Board /fit/ - Fitness Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 06/11/24(Tue)08:51:06 No.74471654 >nofap for 10 days now Testosterone Production with Age >hasn't even been that difficult >not one erection this entire time Am I cooked bros? Not even 30 yet 92 KB PNG : Anonymous 06/11/24(Tue)08:52:19 No.74471658 Nofap is a cult, and you fell for their indoctrination. Enjoy your ed. 74471CC I 74171771 #L

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Science and religion | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/11/24(Tue)00:56:21 No.16731645 imgflip.com € 9 Э loyl.jpg 22 KB JPG >Ask an atheist to explain what they think or believe >They ignore the question and start ranting about Christianity It's so tiresome talking to these people. Anonymous 06/11/24(Tue)00:58:07 No.16731653 >>16731645 (OP) # >Ask a Christian if they believe snakes can talk >They ignore the question and start ranting about trannies and dinosaurs >>16731658 # >>16731678 # >>16731727 # >>16732157 # >>16732707 # >>16732839 # >>16736999 # >>16740016 #

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Anon tries flirting | /r/Greentext

⠀ Anonymous 06/14/24(Fri)16:10:04 No.77830130 I approached a girl today 64 KB JPG >at gym >See cute girl I've seen for a while doing some leg extensions >Go into locker room and get changed into gym clothes >Start doing pull ups on pull up bar >She comes over and starts doing curls next to me with 4kg dumbbells >I do a couple sets >I look over >She looks at me and smiles >I think I may as well practice my social skills >I say "hey, what's your name" >She tells me her name and we start talking >We have a bit of banter and she literally did the zoomer "Light skin stare" with her finger in an L shape on her chin and said "I like your tattoos" >I say thanks and we talk some more >She then asks me if I do Coke >I say no >She giggles and say she does coke on the weekends but she "LOVES WEED, that's my go to" >I immediately don't want to talk to her anymore >Say some s--- like "yeah I gotta go and train some triceps, I'll see you around" Felt good that I actually approached a girl for the first time in a year. But didn't feel good to know that the cute girl I've been crushing for a while is a druggie.

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Master debator | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 103 KB PNG 06/14/24(Fri)13:59:04 No.919880769 be me >Having a debate at school >Bring up tiktok videos of people that share some of my opponent's views in which they poorly defend them >"I haven't heard of this so that's a conspiracy" >" people that share this view said contradictory things 15 years ago" >Large generalization about entire populations >"No u" >1st place

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pic unrelated | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Y8aZBVFI)! 12/01/15(Tue)01:59:52 No.57165901 > be me > politician > acquired considerable popularity by promising economic reforms for the average worker > elected in 1933, in power for 12 years > kidnap citizens and send them to internment camps > completely take over the country's economy > increase government spending to unprecedented levels > military spending reaches 35% of GDP > warmonger a lot, bring country into WWII for no reason > be Franklin Delano Roosevelt > pic unrelated.jpg

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Anon is a chinese beraucrat | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/23/21(Tue) 08:28:56 No.850295538 > be me > learning about Qing dynasty in history > actually pretty cool, some interesting battles >get to conflict in Beijing > learning about how Zicheng rebels attacked Tiananmen Gate > "most of the more brutal fighting took place in Tiananmen Square" >girl in back puts up her hand > "what happened in Tiananmen Square?" > me and my teacher say "nothing" at the same time > ofw

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Anon discovers a new category of porn | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous door 334 KB JPG 06/11/24(Tue)21:55:23 No.77803639 >bored at home >find big folder of oldtime dvds >my dads old movie collections >lots of blank discs >curious >put some in pc to watch >its cellphone video of a door >moaning coming from behind >think i found my dads secret p--- stash >pull out my c--- and start beating >moaning gets louder >door opens in video >recognize woman moaning >its my mum >and its not a sex tape >she is in labor, about to give birth to me >mfw Immediately lose erection and its been impossible to get hard since. The baby version of me has made present-day me impotent. I dont know who to blame for this.

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