Your daily reminder to never mix alcohol, cocaine, and ketamine | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

File: file.png (1.04 MB, 948x590) Rekieta Law Chief of Tomfoolery Anonymous 05/27/24(Mon) 18:20:38 No. 199535784 ►>>199535884 >>199535964 >>199536613 >>199536925 >>199537441 >anime sucks cope and sneed for five dollars ☐ Anonymous 05/27/24(Mon) 18:24:12 No. 199535832 >animesuckscopeandsneed for 5 dollars ☐ Anonymous 05/27/24(Mon) 18:25:59 No. 199535866 ► >CHRIS CHAN CHRIS CHAN CHRIS CHAN glurghauauagh Anonymous 05/27/24(Mon) 18:40:14 No. 199536073 >animesuckscopeandsneed for 5 dollars Anonymous 05/27/24(Mon) 18:44:05 No. 199536136 ► >anime sucks... cope anDSNEED for five dollahs

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon is stalling | /r/Greentext

Quoted By: >>247771948 >>247771968 >>247771806 >I'll turn him into a weapon after our 2nd date >I'll turn him into a weapon after our first kiss >I'll turn him into a weapon after our first time in bed >I'll turn him into a weapon at our 1-year anniversary >I'll turn him into a weapon after he proposes >I'll turn him into a weapon after our wedding >I'll turn him into a weapon once I am pregnant >I'll turn him into a weapon after our first child is born

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They're so fast lmfao | /r/Greentext

Quoted By: >>247771948 >>247771968 >>247771806 >I'll turn him into a weapon after our 2nd date >I'll turn him into a weapon after our first kiss >I'll turn him into a weapon after our first time in bed >I'll turn him into a weapon at our 1-year anniversary >I'll turn him into a weapon after he proposes >I'll turn him into a weapon after our wedding >I'll turn him into a weapon once I am pregnant >I'll turn him into a weapon after our first child is born

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Anime fans like to bitch | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/06/24(Thu)10:09:45 No.267426896 images(2).jpg 54 KB JPG >Ancient warriors said to be the strongest in history since the beginning of the Anime/Manga >People got butthurt when they were...too Op Why are retards like this?

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Anon becomes a parent | /r/Greentext

File: 3fb85ce1580af24d83f6bde17301e0fe85e(...).png (204 KB, 1063x1063) him Parents of /r9k/Anonymous 10/18/18(Thu)11:30:47 No.48770954 [Reply] ► >>48771097 >>48771290 >>48771357 >>48772582 >>48772649 >be 19 yr old kv suicidal depressed neet >live with parents >unmarried sister gets preggers because of her bf and doesn't want the kid, but doesn't want to abort either >kid is born, beautiful boy >she abandons him at parents home to pursue her dead end "acting career >parents, and i basically take care of >love him like my own son, he calls me papa >son grows up fine, i get warehouse job to have more money to make him happier >start jogging in the morning to have enough stamina to play with him >son is great at academics, gets As >start getting along better with my own parents since we're taking care of my son together >work harder and get promoted, more money to buy son toys >experience first hand what raising a child is like, love him >now am 36 yrs old kv with a managerial job at a shipping company >son has gone to univ this year >parents and i are very lonely with nothing to do all day >wait for son's call in the back of our heads all the time >sister is still struggling with her acting career (son calls her auntie Imao) >son is coming home for christmas >can't decide what to do to celebrate his first year at college >almost know for certain that if son hadn't been born, i would've probably jumped off a building to end my pathetic life Any other parents here?

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Players remorse | /r/Greentext

MAKING FRIENDS IN CSGO memegenerator.net ☐ Anonymous 03/03/19(Wed)16:53:1 No.7743764 I feel like my life is wasted. I have over 9,000 hours in csgo, over a year of just playing a game. I'm not even good at it, I'm stuck at the bottom of silver 2 getting only a few kills a round. I could have gotten a girlfriend and had a loving relationship in a year, but I decide to spend it on on a stupid game. I don't even have fun playing it, I just keep doing more and more matches over and over in hopes that I will one day get I will get good at it. I've invested so much into things like my pc and I follow any gimmick from any company that claims to improve your performance. High Refresh? Wireless Mouse? RGB? SSD? Nothing. So I just sit there, starting at my $3,500 pc and my 240hz monitor during spectator and wonder where it all went wrong. At least I haven't spent any money on the game it's self with skins, that I can be grateful for.

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Anon in italy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous napoli 06/07/24(Fri)09:11:50 No.77748545 nr Buiton AP 8705100157-1.jpg 88 KB JPG >visiting naples >"southern italy man, it's gonna be great, people are amazing, food is the best..." >streets look like s---, trash everywhere, walls are covered with graffitis, mostly of maradona >everyone's obsessed with maradona for some reason, he is like some ancient napolitan deity here >local people are either criminals or communists, sometimes both >people attempted to rob me twice >food is not horrible but i've had better pizza napolitans, what do you have to say for yourself?

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Anon sees the hypocrisy in Shrek | /r/Greentext

Anonymous MYERS MURPHY DIAZ LITHCOW S SHREK 132 KB JPG 06/06/24(Thu)22:57:50 No.919498976 Shrek's Message: >You shouldn't judge people based on traits they're born with. They have feelings too. Also Shrek: >Haha look at Farquad, he's so short!

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Anon has trouble getting his lemonade stick rigid like a ston | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Thu 06 Jun 2024 20:21:13 No.198246849 View Reply Original Report Quoted By: >>198246871 >>198246899 >>198247320 >>198248520 >>198248565 >>198248591 >>198248609 >>198248614 >>198248998 I can't get boners anymore Puerto Rican !Wbk90kn60g Thu 06 Jun 2024 20:21:44 No.198246865 Quoted By: >>198246889 Report Why Anonymous Thu 06 Jun 2024 20:22:01 No.198246871 Report >>198246849 take steroids, works every time 45KiB, 947x954, 1717609937481939.jpg View Anonymous Thu 06 Jun 2024 20:22:33 No.198246885 Report Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO You can borrow mine bro

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Life of the party | /r/Greentext

File: alone at party.png (15 KB, 489x423) Am I really that forgettable? >I just end up watching TV at every party Parties Anonymous 10/05/15(Mon)20:01:33 No.23004815 ► Does anyone else feel /invisible/ at parties? >Be me >At parties all the time >No one ever talks to me >It's weird though >People always hang out with me >All around me, they have conversations >They know I'm there, but they never include me >I try to be nice and hold their drinks or whatever when they need it >No one shows appreciation >Even been thrown up on several time >Sometimes, girls get too drunk and start crying about all their problems while I listen >Try to comfort them as much as possible >They never respond >I don't even know why I stary around >I can barely manage a squeak when I try to talk to people Weighed down by people's problems or them having fun in front of me >Paralyzed by fear of losing "friends" >Mfw everyone uses me >Mfw I hear them talking about replacing me >Mfw I'm a couch

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But who else will listen to me quote from those things? | /r/Greentext

1552856629200.png 48 KB PNG >when a guy whose hobbies are purely entertainment consumption (TV, movies, anime, music, video games, 4chan, etc.) says he wants a girlfriend Seriously. Why would you want to torture some innocent girl with your boring life?

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Titta (10 characters min limit is limiting) | /r/Greentext

File: laiva.jpg (55 KB, 552x438) VIKING LINE Anonymous 11/19/15(Thu)19:54:31 No.50979876 >>50979912 >>50980293 >>50980300 >>50980498 >>50980864 >>50981200 >>50981434 >>50981682 >>50984801 >Be at Swedish ship cruise >haven't defecated in a week week >s--- at least three giant python in the toilet >try to flush >not working.jpg >panic > try to flush again but s--- doesn't flush >look for a cleaner lady in the hallway >Swedish is really bad so grab the hand of cleaner, and take her to the bathroom >try to flush and say "titta" (watch in english) while push flush button >s--- goes quite normally away to sewer DOPAMEME APP TITTA. SLOSH

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anon is a Brazilian incel | /r/Greentext

Anonymous > 05/23/24(Thu)13:10:50 No.197657083 maxresdefault.jpg 199 KB JPG >One shot at life >Born an incel in the land of bunda

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