Anon ponders | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 05/09/24(Thu)15:10:17 No.16167028 >we descend from monkeys >we come from Africa What did they mean by this? 188 KB JPG 25 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon goes biblical | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 6871 1150 MBY F53 424 04/20/21(Tue)13:26:21 No.14980697 BB6B0149-59C3-43F2-9FE7-329FE6283F3E.jpg 25 KB JPG >look up meaning of name "Drake" >it means "snake or dragon" >the devil is referred to as both a snake and dragon in the Bible >Jesus's birth name was Yeshua, which translates a Joshua in English >MFW the Bible was the original Drake and Josh >MFW Drake Bell is the antichrist and Josh Peck is the Messiah

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Top minds at Microsoft | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/10/24(Fri)14:05:47 No.676021487 48de604b-99ee-4400-a600-6958a71f0959.jpg 30 KB JPG >no games >buy studios >no games >close studios >still no games what is this strategy called?

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Anon is 32 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous DONKEY KONG 379 KB JPG 05/11/24(Sat) 05:10:35 No.31226912 >32 >decide to look for wife after being loner for years >in better shape then 90% of the population >all my options my age are fat, or bitter, washed up lesbians, into tarot and s--- >just want something normal >hear my buddies fiancés best friend is single after a 4 year relationship >8/10 5 foot 2 blonde, 120 lbs, 23 years old >go to baseball game with him last night to get the dl >tells me if I want a 1 night stand, all I have to do is dress and smell nice and he'll invite me out to the bar when they go out, I take her home and f--- her >if I want her to be my girlfriend, different story. >apparently she's f----- 10 guys in 3 months, 2 nights ago she sucked off her alcoholic 40 year old neighbor >barely works, parents pay all of her s--- >must get every single minor detail on my car fixed >must take her on a very nice date, fancy Mexican or Indian restaurant is expected >after that she'll be my girlfriend but she has a very high list of demands. Expensive dates every week. Expensive vacations a few times every year >last guy spent tens of thousands on her and she was completely ungrateful and bitched the entire time Is this really what dating has become now? Hearing this s--- made me completely depressed. So if I just want to hit it, it's basically free? But if I want more, I have to revolve my entire life around her, then she still isn't grateful and has been ran through? Is this what dating has become? I just want somebody that's attractive and appreciates me. Unrelated but I f----- her older sister years ago 6 Replies View Thread

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Anon laments why people keep bothering him | /r/Greentext

What is wrong with everyone! Anonymous 05/11/24(Sat)01:40:34 No.918186865 >Be Me >Minding my own damn business >Always good at keeping head down >Never get into anyone's business nor do I get into gossip >Is usually pretty chill, enjoying the quiet. >Someone then comes along >B-lines for me >Involves me in their b------- that I have no business being in. >They just select me randomly for no reason >Now people keep dropping s--- into my lap for no reason >Tried to be assertive, bubkis >Tried to be aggressive, yelled at for being an a------ What the f--- is wrong with normies? I'm sitting here doing literally nothing and for some reason that makes you just want me involved in your s---?

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Anon has a plan | /r/Greentext

Anonymous plan 05/10/24(Fri)22:29:38 No.31223850 >Plan: (I'm 6'3) >Go to Japan >Push everyone around >Leave 47 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread

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Beware the pipeline | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 36 KB JPG 05/11/24(Sat) 06:49:11 No.20262150 >had sex with an asian girl with very tight vagina >can't feel anything when having sex with white girls anymore and had to resort to a--- to feel anything >addicted to a--- sex but most girls won't let me >have to f--- gay dudes and now and kinda like it Asian women made me gay (top)

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Character development | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/10/24(Fri)20:44:12 No. 199027791 Mindy-Kaling-55c3bfb3adaf43eb938e7a96a50d114d.jpg 137 KB JPG >Teehee I'm just a cute little indian girl. Just like you guys! I swear! I love 2 shop! I love celebrities and gossip just like white people XD >10 years later >GAHHH F--- WHITE PEOPLE WHY ARENT WHITE GUYS INTERESTED IN MEEE HAIL LUCIFER KILL WHITEY F--- FRED YOU HAVE NO PENIS SHAGGY IS BLACK NOW I AM VELMA! I WILL EAT YOUR BABIES GAHHHHHHHHHH

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Anon ponders black kino | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Once upon a time in South Central LA BOYZ THE HOOD It ain't no fairy tale. DE CE CUBA COOL MRS CREST LA 232 KB JPG 05/11/24(Sat) 11:08:17 No. 199041133 >Black movies in the 90's >Kino >Incredibly acted >Directed well >Actual poignant message that isn't annoying or in your face and actually teaches you something about another culture and may make you less racist overall >Black movies Today >WE WUZ KANGZ >Rap music blasting >Horribly overacted >Horribly directed >Message is about how evil white people are and how blacks actually invented everything making you more racist >Not kino Why is this, unironically? Stuff like pic related and Do The Right Thing are so good, what the f--- happened?

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Anon makes a new friend the only way he knows how | /r/Greentext

Dreamcast 114 KB JPG worst stories thread? I'll start >Be me at like 22 >Party with some of my college wiggas >Hear some dude talking about shenmue, join in on conversation >He says "you're a fan of shenmue?!" >I'm wearing a shenmue shirt under my hoodie so I meant to pull up my hoodie but for some reason I have a brainfart and pull my c--- out >He just stares at me for a second and laughs hysterically >I try to play it off and actually show him the shirt >He says cool shirt and cool d--- too I guess I hate myself

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Anon is hypsistarian | /r/Greentext

File: Same god.jpg (52 KB, 602x289) Yave Jovi Jupiter and Yahweh are the same god Anonymous 05/07/24(Tue)11:48:11 No. 16595587 >>16 >>16596237 >>16598302 >>16601195 >>>16601294 >>16601492 >>16604324 >>16604430 >>16605673 >>16605756 >>166066 And I'm tired of pretending they are not. Hypsistarians were right all this time. Anonymous 05/07/24(Tue)11:56:49 No. 16595596 >>16595607 >>16599298 >>16599488 Anonymous 05/07/24(Tue)13:09:56 No. 16595689 >>16595643 >Yahweh, storm god like Jupiter >be a son that overthrow his father (Cronus-El) The 4 horsemen of the apocolypse were the dieties Zelus, Ares, Limos, and Thanatos >>16598191 >be in constant fight with his brothers/relatives for being the new King of Gods (Baal-Yahweh vs Yam, Zeus vs Typhon) >wins over a civil war in Heavens (Titanomachy, Gigantomachy, War in Heaven) >have sons that want to overthrow you like you did to your father >have sons replacing you in mortals' hearts (Jesus Christ, Orphic Dionysus, Mithraic Apollo) Etc.

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Anon receives guidance | /r/Greentext

• 5h (7/6 19:44) 71510310 JPG 43KB (1024x1024) 1613510906010.jpg 5 Replies back when I was first starting, like 4 months in >at my gym there was always this super jacked black guy that would put up huge numbers >everytime he's done with his set he yells out "0000000 BABY" >it was never obnoxious or anything, I found it funny >he catches me smirking at him after he did it once >he tells me that it helps with the next set >I laugh >a few weeks pass and I'm on a hard set of deadlifts >was still doing stronglifts so these are my max >push through them and for some reason yell out "000000 BABY" >I hear "DAS RIGHT" from across the gym >my next was easier Thank you jacked black man

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Anon and his contributions to society | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 13 KB PNG 11/10/21(Wed)18:07:27 No.158997931 >>158997375 (OP) # >psychiatrist asks what I enjoy doing >tell him I like doing "image edits" >he asks if I ever post them >I tell him I do and that they're used by other people and potentially seen millions of times but it's all posted anonymously >he gets really interested and asks to see >show him over 100 original pepe edits >he says he's seen the character before >next session >him and 2 other psychiatrists are in the room, says he invited them to help me >they ask more about my memes >show them my greentexts which were reposted by redditors and got tens of thousands, up to millions of views >show them my original memes that have "know your meme" pages or big online presences >they're recording me and taking notes the whole time through >get uncomfortable and don't book a follow-up appointment >doctor has offered to cover all further sessions and meet with me 3 times a week as a "case study"

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