Anon's older brother is a huge failure | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

W-- is wrong with my brother 20 KB PNG wrong with him >be me 04/01/24(Mon) 17:38:53 No.76980155 >have an older brother >only talks to me and our parents >wears masks everywhere cuz he's fat af, even during school classes >went to a psychiatrist with mom, didn't say a word, psych says he's never seen such a case before, doesn't know what's >can't go outside alone, doesn't go to school alone, and avoids going outside after school like the plague >high school starting in September >says he won't go alone, but the school is 2km from home, grandpa can't drive cuz drinks rakia every day >already planning to wear a mask in high school too >has a neuro disorder and receives expensive medication funded by the country >MFW i realize that my country is spending 0.00076% of it's GDP on a living failure

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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The Red Cow Project | /r/Greentext

Board /b/ - Random Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 04/01/24(Mon)12:31:54 No.916233450 379 KB PNG >Be me, a cow in the heart of Texas >Eating my grass >Jewish guy approaches me >He tells me that I am the most perfect cow in the world >Tells me that I am special >Surprisingly he doesn't eat my s--- like other cow worshippers do >He takes me on a trip to Israel instead of being turned into a burger >Treats me like a god for the whole journey >Then he f------ burns me alive

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Anon really thought this was a good idea for a thread. | /r/Greentext

FREE Bitcoins R: 93 / I: 10 $ LISTEN UP FEMCEL FRENS!: I've got $25 USD in BTC bucks for any femcel who post an audio recording of her queefing the US national anthem with her p---- in it's entirety! Good luck

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Why does she look like that | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 51 KB JPG 03/30/24(Sat) 09:13:01 No.671803171 >See an ugly woman in a video game >Say I'm not gonna buy it cause it doesn't appeal to me. >Everyone gets mad at me, downvotes me, calls me an incel, tells me to touch grass Why is this? Why am I not allowed to only buy products that appeal to me?

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Anon is straight | /r/Greentext

195 KB PNG >be me, STRAIGHT elderly chinese man >10 minutes ago >go to sandwich shop >order the same thing I always do from the same guy that's always there >see someone new come out from the back room and go behind the counter >cute ass slim mexican femboy >notice he keeps eyeing me every few seconds while my sandwich is being made >make eye contact and he smiles >asks if I need anything else in the softest little voice >"I need you to do something" >pull out my service revolver >force him to beat me at MAHJONG otherwise I will banish him to the land of Yi (my term for barbarians) 7 Replies Anonymous View Thread 10/13/23(Fri)23:51:36 No.75059287 I wanna f--- the smug cat >>75059292 #

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Anon fixes his life. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Meth fixed my life, thanks met(...) 150 KB JPG 03/31/24(Sun)19:45:18 No.76972605 >Room is just me sleeping on bare mattress surrounded by moldy plates >Take meth >Clean room, bleach everything >Apply to 50 different jobs >Clean car, call in to have it serviced and get my warrant >Send long texts to entire family apologizing for being a f--- up That was a week ago, a temp agency already got back to me, they want me to start on wednesday. I love this drug

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The strategy of idgaf | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 42 KB JPG 04/01/24(Mon) 17:54:14 No.195522877 >Earth: Stop killing whales >Japan: No >Earth: It'll ruin your international reputation >Japan: No it won't. We'll just...keep doing it. Unapologetically. We literally just don't give a f---. 99% of the world don't actually care. Kinda weird how this form of diplomacy won.

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Anon is disappointed with Pewdiepie | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Y1yMsuwG 852 KB PNG 03/31/24(Sun)04:50:44 No.463463279 >Be Pewdiepie >Be the most subscribed YouTuber >Use 4chan >Don't redpill your young fan base >Marry an Italian If I saw this f----- IRL... Anonymous (ID: j+4aYavW) Z >>463463279 (OP) # 03/31/24(Sun)04:51:39 No.463463334 Tran >>463471460 # Anonymous (ID: nlSpQaRr) >>463463279 (OP) # 03/31/24(Sun)04:52:06 No.463463357 >Don't redpill your young fan base Wrong >>463479410 # >>463499662 #

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Anon has no sense of smell | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Okay guys. Here goes. >be me age 17 10/25/16(Tue)17:24:09 No.3232916 >my brother is a Chad and frequently has friends over >I'm holed up in my room, I hate going outside of my room when there's guests over >Really need to s--- >Don't want to leave >See a towel in my room >Squat over the towel and s--- on it instead of leaving my room >Continue doing this throughout the years, 'cause I don't have to leave the comfiness of my room and the poop comes out easier that way >Have to eventually deliver poop-covered towel to my toilet which involves walking across the hallway >Sometimes I'd store many poop towels until I finally decided it was time to dispose of them >Have to make sure coast is clear before delivering towel >Mess up one day and my brother comes out >Get startled, drop towels full of poop >My brother's face scarred me forever

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Anon tries laundry | /r/Greentext

No.73694965 86 KB JPEG > Be me > never done laundry in my life. Moved directly from my parents house into a house with my girlfriend > Mom has always complained about how tough it is to do laundry while my Dad is at work > Gf complains about how much laundry she has to do with us and our two kids > Eventually divorce, and I'm living by myselfd > dreading-laundry.wav > throw clothes in the machine > come back two hours later and take them out What is their problem?

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Their PR has been so terrible lately | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.51 MB JPG group 04/01/24(Mon)05:43:03 No.195506688 >hard working >conservative >highest earning ethnic group in america >over 90% own their own homes >strong family values >contribute to society in every sector >over 80% are college educated >high iq and best test scores out of any >many american companies have indian ceos >virtually commit zero crime unlike blacks and mexicans >net contributes to the economy unlike blacks >dress clean and don't act like thugs so why exactly are Indians hate? Makes no sense

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Anon is irish | /r/Greentext

186 KB JPG >Be me >Genuinely autistic >Coworkers and I are enjoying an after work dinner >Everybody is talking about their ethnicity, one says their Norwegian, another says they're German, another French, British, Israeli >I mention that I'm Irish. Israeli guy jokes with me, Shouldn't you be ordering the potatoes?" he asks. I laugh. >I reply with "Shouldn't you be bombing hospitals?" >Entire table goes silent and I get looks. >Everybody gets mad and somebody says they're going to tell this to HR. >I might lose my f------ job What the f--- did I do wrong? How badly did I f--- up? 16 Replies 1 Image View Thread

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Anon Doesn't Understand Mad Max | /r/Greentext

File: mid mix.jpg (446 KB, 2048x1347) >>197741303 >>197741530 >>197741626 Anonymous 03/30/24(Sat)04:34:23 No.197740949 >>197742087 >>197742119 >>197743310 >>197743331 >>197743687 >>197744146 >>197744811 >>197744841 >>197745454 >>197749275 >>197749706 >>197750910 >>197752118 >>197752421 >>197752545 >>197754063 >> >first film >society seems to be more or less functional, people live normal lives, things are just less stable and available than it had been before >only real problem seems to be scarcity of resources and brutal road bandits >second film >people are living at an absolute minimum trying to survive >the old world seems to be literally gone (the pilot guy talks about how much he misses "clean ladies", even though in the first film there were plenty of them) What exactly happened between the making of the first and the second? Anonymous 03/30/24(Sat)04:43:38 No. 197741210 ► Degeneration Anonymous 03/30/24(Sat)04:46:51 No. 197741303 >>197744717 >>197748384 >>197740949 (OP) Nuclear war. Anonymous 03/30/24(Sat)11:59:52 No.197754063 >>197740949 (OP) Emu Wars

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