Anon got lost in the pizza sauce | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

List >be me : Anonymous 03/14/24(Thu)04:32:47 No.76774866 IMG_9011.jpg 1007 KB JPG >have pizza place next to my work >cheap pizzas so i go there most days >sadly soon become a regular >staff members start asking about my life >dont want to tell them i basically dont have one >start lying to them when they ask me stuff >"up to much this weekend?" >"Yeah, it's my sister's wedding, should be fun!" >I don't have a sister >"What are you doing for Thanksgiving?" >"Going home for it, big family thing!" >I haven't spoken to my parents for six years >eventually lean into it and have an entirely fake life I've made up to avoid awkwardness with the people who work at this pizza parlour >one day guy there who i talk to the most invites me out for drinks with them after work >decline, tell him i have a date, but some other time >"I hope it goes well brotherman!" >next time i go he asks me how the date went >tell him it went well >ffw a few months >basically told them an entirely made up story of a wonderful blossoming relationship, stealing romantic stories from books and movies and passing them off as my own >go in one day >"Been with the girl a while now anon, things must be pretty serious?" >hadnt planned for this question >blurt out the first thing i can think of >"yeah i actually proposed yesterday, we're engaged." >he shouts back to the kitchen >"aye, anon got engaged!" >get some scattered congratulations from the people there who know me well >get home with my pizza >open pizza box >has pic related inside have i taken this too far?

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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