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Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:51:51 No.26715893 >>26715903 >>26715932 >>26716262 >>26716306 File: Zg3BZZn.png (73 KB, 400x300) >>26704745 (You) > Plushes You guys want cringe? >2006, be 12 >I learn from Nintendo Power about Pokemon Mystery Dungeon and its story >Read through the little manga it gave me about that one kid who became a Torchic >The prospect of transforming into a talking Pokemon and exploring the world with fellow Pokemon while using special powers excited me to no end >I could finally escape from my horrid social life, my overweight body, and family troubles! > Start using my imagination to conjure a method of both transforming into a Pokemon in the middle of the night, and magically warping to the Pokemon world of laidback adventures and indiscriminate friendship >I remember that I have 50+ Pokemon plushes >Before I went to bed every night, I took a plushie and furiously rubbed it over every single portion of my body for about an hour >Yes, even my mouth, groin, and ass crack >I do this while envisioning every body part I rub becoming that of the respective Pokemon >I begin with Mew because being a diety in the Pokemon world is better than being a pleb >After three nights, I realize it doesn't work with this plush >I move onto Mudkip, because i herd everybody lieks Mudkipz (my actual reasoning) >I did this with a Mega Mushroom plush because maybe the Mushroom Kingdom was part of the Pokemon world and Pokemon liked Italian plumbers >After about a week, I lose faith in my plan >But I still like rubbing Pokemon on my skin, because I feel that I metaphysically "bond" with the plushie, so that I can adopt its personality in real life and be charming > Plus intimacy feels like you are wanted by somebody >a week later, my teachers call my parents in worry about my sudden change in behavior >I.e. gnawing on other students' shirts, stomping in the middle of class, staring at random students with wide eyes and a large, creepy smile, and screaming during recess >They never figure out why I did it, think it's suppressed trauma or some s--- This isn't even the worst part. Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:53:15 No.26715903 >>26715911 >>26715932 >>26716262 >>26716306 File: marshstomp.png (577 KB, 568x456) >>26715893 > For Thanksgiving that same year, my family and I go to stay at my mother's friend's house in Kansas >They have two daughters who are each 2-4 years older than I am >My little brother brings about three plushies with him to play with >The drive is about 12 hours long, so we get there at midnight; I'm tired as hell >Whole host family is welcoming, daughters are nice, etc. >The day before, I rubbed myself with Umbreon, so I act edgy, unsocial and cold while also rubbing my mom's leg with my cheek next to the hosts >They are confused, but just assume its special snowflake behavior >We stay in one of the daughter's rooms, on an inflatable bed >During the night, despite being tired as hell, I wait for my brother to fall asleep for two hours > Once he does, I carefully remove a random Pokemon plush from his zipped backpack >Before I can tell which one it is because it is pitch black, I commence the standard rite of Pokemon initiation and heart swapping >Before five minutes, I pass out from exhaustion with the plush in my pants, close to my hip Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:54:16 No.26715911 ► >>26715932 >>26715944>>26715959 >>26716262 >>26716306 File: $_1.jpg (24 KB, 400x264) >>26715903 Last Part >Wake up in the morning, alone in the room, feeling an incredibly gluey sensation between my groin >I take off my pants, see a white, dried, and sparkly substance everywhere on the inside of my shorts > Realized I got a few drops on the plush as well (it turned out to be a Poliwhirl) >"This must be the stuff they talked about for the puberty videos they showed during my health class!" >I realize this is the real deal because all of the other "wet dreams" I've bragged about to my family and classmates was just me pissing on the bed >I'm so ecstatic that I forget to act like Poliwhirl, and run with my pants and plush into the dining room where everyone is already eating breakfast >I show everyone, including my family, the hosts, and their daughters, saying to each of them one by one "Now I'm a real man!" while drawing the outline of the massive c-- area >One of the daughters gag a little on their hash browns, the hosts stare with amused disbelief >My mother just gives me this face of resigned disappointment (I thought she was being sentimental over my transition into adulthood) >Little brother is p----- because I got his plush dirty and he wanted to show his plushies to them first >Host family just tries to congratulate me awkwardly, everyone else follows suit after their initial reactions WAT >I thank them all as if it was an awards gathering, telling my mother to never wash these pants or the plush again as a memento of my growth >As I leave for the other bedroom to show the other daughter, I hear my mom groan >I don't know why she didn't stop me >A couple of weeks later, my family forces me to go to a psychiatrist for unrelated reasons > Yep, it's Asperger's I stopped about a couple of months later. Nobody has mentioned it ever since. Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:57:58 No.26715932 ► File: 1418782142.jpg (13 KB, 336x280) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 H-------- anon Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:58:56 No.26715944 ► File: tsundereglaceon.png (666 KB, 1018x428) >>26715911 top tier cringe, I love the stories like this Anonymous 06/12/16 (Sun)21:36:50 No.26716262 ► File: 1462698180621.png (150 KB, 516x390) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 my god Anonymous 06/12/16 (Sun)21:39:29 No.26716306 ► >>26716629 File: HORY SHET.jpg (54 KB, 680x587) >>26715893 >>26715903 ARR >>26715911 someome cap this Anonymous 06/12/16 (Sun)22:01:01 No.26716540 ► File: 1379438548411.jpg (55 KB, 348x383) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 >Yes, even my mouth, groin, and ass crack >I act edgy, unsocial and cold while also rubbing my mom's leg with my cheek next to the hosts >I realize this is the real deal because all of the other "wet dreams" I've bragged about to my family and classmates was just me pissing on the bed >Now I'm a real man! >NOW I'M A REAL MAN Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)22:03:18 No.26716563 File: 1380773677679.png (88 KB, 282x219) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 I'VE SEEN SOME S--- Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)22:11:51 No.26716654 ► File: 1465615539801s.jpg (5 KB, 125x125) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 This is the best thing I've read in weeks.

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File: Screenshot 20241127-155712.png (228 KB, 742x721) Something Happened Anonymous (ID: HG6Lars) 11/27/24(Wed)17:35:15 No.489774321 ► >Polls all indicate a Harris victory, though close >Ann Selzer poll, known as a canary in a coal mine, indicated Harris winning lowa >Trump campaign suspiciously quiet nearing the end of the campaign >Harris campaign had significant energy >North Carolina predicted to be close >Virginia unusually red >The four countries willing and able to f--- with US democracy (Iran, China, Russia, NK) stand to benefit from a Trump win (cause it's destabilizing) >Billionaires cozy up to Trump despite a Harris victory being predicted >TRUMP WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 20 YEARS A REPUBLICAN CANDIDATE WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >WITH AN APPROVAL RATING EQUIVALENT TO CANCER Bros, I'm telling you, something funky happened

☐ Anonymous 11/25/24(Mon) 10:39:13 No. 17295889 >>17295909 >>17295925 >>17295935 >>17295976 >win independence >DON'T devolve into military dictatorship or absolute monarchy >start off with fresh land and an unusually high literacy rate >neighbors are retarded savages who live at the mercy of nature >large ocean between them and European chimpouts >shitgoesdown.jpg >"here tovarish buy my land I need to fund a chimpout" >ok > "here America buy my land, I need to fund my own le chimpout" >ok >"hey America there was a chimpout in Texas we'll join you (and won't secede later) if you help" >ok >*doubles land in two years* It's amazing how well they took advantage of what they had. Many nations have completely fumbled the bag during their development. What went so right?

Anonymous (ID: Lvuvmf4p 11/21/24(Thu)03:45:24 No.489109549 16 KB JPG >4chan known as a right-wing Nazi haven >allows all types of opinions and rhetoric >X known as a right-wing Nazi haven >allows all types of opinions and rhetoric >reddit known as a left-wing haven >bans anyone posting anything even slightly right of center >bluesky quickly becoming known as a left-wing haven >bans anyone posting anything even slightly right of center Really makes you think.

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Anon The Squirrel | /r/Greentext

Board /bant/ - International/Random Anonymous (ID: 66YGWCpl ) ▼ Settings Mobile Home 02/19/24(Mon)15:33:36 No.19623852 > Be me, squirrel chilling on a three > Eating some delicious acorns for breakfast > Finish one and start chewing another one > This one is very bitter and hard to chew even for me > Yuck i don't like this one, throw it to the ground > Hit a man with it by accident 184 KB JPG > Man starts screaming and shooting his car, then falls to the ground and starts crying > Another person gets out of a house screaming and shooting the same car > Some women start crying for help > Start to hear sirens coming from afar W-- is wrong with humans squirrelbros?

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Yellow Three Pointed Star | /r/Greentext

Board/pol/ - Politically Incorrect Anonymous (ID: a3wRvLpz) Suck my uncut Exhaust Pipe Settings Mobile Home 02/19/24(Mon)17:20:08 No.459203232 759 KB PNG >Be me, today. >Driving car down the motorway home from wagie hell. >See protesters with Palestine flags on overpass. >Traffic builds up due to people wanting to show or not show support. >I roll down window and flip them off. >Do the same at the next overpass. >All the while ironically driving Mercedes. Zionists dont drive Mercedes. So f--- Israel too. >Go home and have pork belly for dinner.

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Hey anon guess what | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Vu7Qc6Uz MENGA ME WHEN TIKTOK RULES THE WORLD Don 49 KB JPG about it Creativity is dead 02/20/24(Tue)17:07:34 No.19628064 >make greentext >greentext is stolen and posted on reddit >greentext is stolen from reddit to be posted on Twitter >greentext is stolen from Twitter to be posted on tiktok and narrated by an ai voice >tikcucks think its a meme and laugh

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Anon is a squirrel | /r/Greentext

File: 83019015.jpg.0 (1).jpg (184 KB, 1200x800) Anonymous (ID: 26XH+OIF n---- that's nuts Anonymous (ID: edugW3FJ n---- that's nuts W-- is wrong with humans squirrelbros? Anonymous (ID: 96GJIE74) 02/19/24 (Mon)12:35:17 No.19623857 n---- that's nuts Anonymous (ID: R1P9QR3M) Anonymous (ID: 66YGWCpl) 102/19/24(Mon)12:33:36 No.19623852 >>19624696 >Be me, squirrel chilling on a three > Eating some delicious acorns for breakfast > Finish one and start chewing another one > This one is very bitter and hard to chew even for me > Yuck i don't like this one, throw it to the ground > Hit a man with it by accident n---- that's nuts > Man starts screaming and shooting his car, then falls to the ground and starts crying > Another person gets out of a house screaming and shooting the same car > Some women start crying for help > Start to hear sirens coming from afar 02/19/24(Mon)12:36:19 No.19623862 02/19/24(Mon)12:52:48 No.19623962| 02/19/24(Mon)12:53:49 No.19623965

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Freud was Right | /r/Greentext

IMG_0295.jpg (337 KB, 2048x2048) google yandex iqdb wait ♥ Anonymous 02/19/24(Mon)15:19:35 No.263176418 >>263176549 >>263177239 >>263177476 >>263177723 >>263178053 >>263178060 >>263178063 >>263178846 >>263178890 >>263178994 >>263179526 >>263180032 >>263180453 >>263181243 >>263181865 >>263182431 >>263183846 >>263184074>>263185905>>263188507 I think all girls would be better as Gigasluts who have slept with 100+ men >>263176549 F------ brutal. Anonymous 02/19/24(Mon)15:23:29 No.263176549 >>263176608 >>263176634>>263176652 >>263176658 >>263176665 >>263176685>>263176719 >>263176725 >>263177192 >>263177376 >>263177951 >>263177980 >>263178016 >>263178102 >>263178108 >>263178141 >>263178681 >>263178890 >>263179526 >>263179881 >>263179952 >>263180032 >>263180161 >>263180210 >>263180230 >>263180305>>263181345 >>263181449 >>263181469 >>263181601 >>263181686 >>263181799 >>263182022 >>263182412 >>263182431 >>263182993 >>263183033 >>263183128 >>263183156 >>263183231 >>263183258 >>263183496 >>263183556 >>263183816 >>263184823 >>263185019 >>263185038 >>263185735 >>263185816 >>263185854 >>263186024 >>263186219 >>263186255 >>263187036 >>263187348 >>263187719 >>263187785>>263187842 >>263188137 >>263188162 >>263188293 >>263188580 >>263188646 >>263189991 >>263190204 >>263190541 >>263190562 >>263190569 >>263190599 >>263190654 >>263190736 >>263190761 >>263190774>>263191477 >>263191503 >>263191522 Anonymous 02/19/24(Mon)15:25:16 No.263176608 1556875063716.png (176 KB, 487x480) google yandex iqdb wait die >>263176418 (OP) Freud was right, you are attracted to women similar to your mother Anonymous 02/19/24(Mon)15:26:02 No.263176634 1686384763485371.png (443 KB, 943x795) google yandex iqdb wait >>263176549 Imao first post best post Anonymous 02/19/24(Mon)15:26:32 No.263176652 ✓ >>263176549 god damn delete thread OP, for the honor of your mother Anonymous 02/19/24(Mon)15:26:34 No.263176654 ✓ >asymmetrical elbow gloves Anonymous 02/19/24(Mon)15:26:40 No.263176658 ✓ >>263176549 Anon I'm afraid I have to call the police. It simply isn't legal to own n----- like that anymore.

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anon writes an offbrand vaporeon copypasta | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 5 KB JPEG 20/02/2024, 14:30:54 No.55864951 Hello pokemon fans, did you know that Gardevoir is the most fuckable pokemon? Not only does she look human enough, she is also obsessed with her trainer, meaning she will pin you to the ground and bounce on your c--- like a pogo stick while she's at it. Her perfectly round, curved body is enough to turn even the purest man on, and she has moves that can heal you, meaning you can dump fat loads in her ten times over, and she won't get pregnant.

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pic unrelated | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/19/24 (Mon)02:25:06 No.76510710 [Reply] My life was better during covid. Anonymous 02/19/24 (Mon)02:28:52 No.76510748 Same, I remember being high every waking moment and beating all the Dark souls games back to back

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Anon bitches about female armor | /r/Greentext

File: more like harlot.png (424 KB, 637x927) Anonymous 05/30/17(Tue)12:41:22 No.378557220 >>378557434 >>378557509 >>378557579 >>378557753 >>378557789 >>378557806 >>378557906 >>378558130 >>378558237 >>378558465 >>378558886 >>378559158>>378560293 >>378560434 >>378561104 >>378564201 >>378564672 >>378565228>>378566152 >>378566880 >>378568172 >>378572801 >>378579604 >>378580629 >>378581015 >>378581089 >>378581965 >>378583175 >>378588996 >>378589802 >>378593402 >>378595429 >>378597120 >>378598820 >>378600406 >>378603129 >>378604059 >>378606441 >>378607231 >>378610561 Just what the F--- is she wearing? She's suppose to be a soldier right? Why the F--- is she wearing what's basically a god damn bikini out in the battlefield? Is she TRYING to get herself r---- and killed? Is she seriously this f------ retarded? Anonymous 05/30/17(Tue)12:42:28 No.378557310 >>378557975 >>378559280 >>378559296 >>378559836 >>378566420 >>378567225 >>378568272 >>378568447 >>378568803 >>378570675 >>378579740 >>378579752 >>378579975 >>378580203 >>378580612 >>378581629 >>378583403 >>378584512 >>378585230 >>378585760 >>378585906 >>378586947 >>378587680 >>378587921 >>378590883 >>378592276 >>378593443 >>378595409 >>378601447 >>378601619 >>378602354 >>378605149 >>378605474 >>378606262 >>378606276 >>378606441 What I find most pathetic is the little pseudo-intellectual nerd fuckboys who think they're smart and totally perceptive for pointing out deisgn flaws in stupid gaudy armour. Like you want to make it clear to all your peers "I'm the smart one. I am the intellectual one. I understand combat and value logic above all" and you go on nitpicking this stupid s--- that is made purely for the f--- of it. The overwhelming irony of it all is that you're the biggest m------------ retard alive for actually believing you're the only one who can perceive the stratigic faults of these designs and thinking other people aren't as perceptive as you. here's a reality check you f------ c--- wrangler. Everyone is aware of these things. They don't spend hours whining about it on image boards and forums and f------ youtube comment sections. Not because they're stupid, uneducated or unperceptive. It's because it's insignificant s---, and they aren't insecure enough to go whine about trivial realism b------- in cheap, flashy entertainment. You're like the f------ that whines about people not knowing how bad fast food is for them because they continue to eat it. They know it's bad. They don't give a s---. You whiny little fagget.

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Run For The Border | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Dad Stories >Be me when I was 14 >1994 ▾ Settings Mobile Home 02/19/24(Mon)19:41:27 No.76519118 321 KB PNG >Immigrant family in Canada from Scotland (Important for context) >Dad likes to sleep nude. >Watching TV at 11pm >See the sensor lights flick on in the back yard. >See 4 or 5 boys running through gardens, jumping fences like Mexicans. >Notify dad who's sleeping. >Dad raged like a typical Scotsman. >ScottishRage.jpeg >Jumps out of the bed and runs down to back door in the kitchen. >Watched through kitchen window. >Dad charges at the kids while fully naked, ass glowing orange from lighom >Completely naked. >D--- swinging like an elephants trunk >All of the boys manage to jump the fence except one. >Dad, yelling like groundskeeper willie. Scottish gibberish. >Grabs last guy by the leg as he tries to escape over the fence. >Swings him down to the floor and proceeds to beat the s--- out of him. >All while ass naked, b------- hangs like a turkeys gullet. >Could see the guy trying to not get touched by my dads junk as he gets his ass kicked because that would be gay. >kek >Dad leaves him for dead and goes back inside to rest to regain strength. >The next morning the police show up, dad arrested and then released due to self defence.

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For those worried about Ai advancement: We bought some time | /r/Greentext

US 2h (2/19 16:30) · 459204259.86 Re. 17 Img JPG 258KB (750 × 741) · IMG_2351.jpg 33 Replies Dexerto @Dexerto Reddit has reportedly signed a $60M deal to sell user content to an Al company Via Bloomberg ¹9 LETS F------ GO!!!!!!!!! DM 2h (2/19 16:31). 459204361 >>459204259 (OP) REDDITOR L Subscribe US 2h (2/19 16:31). 459204375 8 Replies : >>459204259 (OP) This will delay Al progress by at least 5 years, good news

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Dark Times | /r/Greentext

Board /bant/ - International/Random Anonymous (ID: TFPEXW2K) 64 KB JPG >go on bant >racist p--- >go on r9k >p--- >go on b >child p--- Settings Mobile Home 02/19/24(Mon)12:05:01 No.19622864 what happened to 4chan being funny now its a p--- site

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A story about domestic violence | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 : Anonymous IIT: Family stories. 70 KB GIF Settings Mobile Home 02/19/24(Mon)09:45:23 No.76509154 Family secret incoming. >Brother was outcasted from the family home back in 2021 at 18 years old. >He beat the s--- out of his female friend's boyfriend during school hours towards the end of the year. >She didn't pick my brother as a boyfriend because his personality was ass. >Our brother was a spoiled p------------ and our parents had enough. >Dad and mom drove him to a homeless shelter nearby and he came back demanding an explanation. >He threw a s----fit when Mom and Dad didn't budge because they told him it was time he grew up and leave. >He swung at Mom and then my sister's husband jumped him. >He got his ass beat and my sister's husband dragged him outside and threw him down the front door staircase. >It was 6 stairs, literally just 6 f------ stairs. >When his head impacted the ground he went limp. >We didn't care at the time, we just wanted him gone. >When we were taking him to a homeless shelter a town over, he was going in and out of consciousness. >Last words my sister's husband told him "I'm going to beat your ass the next time I see you." >We dragged him out of the vehicle and that was the last time we saw him. >He just laid there on the concrete as we drove off. >Our parents and family blocked his number and social accounts. >Our parents threw all his stuff out, photos, furniture, whatever to make room for my sister, husband, and her baby at the time. 02/19/24(Mon)09:49:06 No.76509198 : Anonymous >>76509154 (OP) # >Fast forward to this week. >Our parents were notified by a hospital outside of town that our brother had died from a seizure. >Come to find out he was suffering from impact damage to his head which damaged his brain. >He couldn't get proper help because he was homeless, and couldn't get a job due to said damage. >Couldn't contact us to get some help because he was blocked on all forms of contact. >He couldn't function properly and was just roaming around aimlessly due to brain damage. >Couldn't get a job because no one would've wanted to hire someone with issues like that. >Died alone, suffering. >Our parents have been distraught for the past few days. >They don't know how to react because they know why he was suffering. >They decided to not react because they just wanted him out at that time. >No one in the family other than immediate know he is dead, and we don't know how we'll tell the news. I hope the others don't decide to fabricate some b-------, personally id see it as f----- up. He made mistakes in the past but it doesn't mean you fabricate a fake ass story about his death to other family members. >>76509243 # >>76509299 # >>76509655 # >>76510002 # >>76511286 # >>76512178 # >>76512968 # >>76513786 # >>76513974 # >>76514101 # >>76514331 # >>76515044 # >>76516866 # >>76516914 # >>76517167 # >>76517348 #

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Greentext Stories - Anon becomes a man | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:51:51 No.26715893 >>26715903 >>26715932 >>26716262 >>26716306 File: Zg3BZZn.png (73 KB, 400x300) >>26704745 (You) > Plushes You guys want cringe? >2006, be 12 >I learn from Nintendo Power about Pokemon Mystery Dungeon and its story >Read through the little manga it gave me about that one kid who became a Torchic >The prospect of transforming into a talking Pokemon and exploring the world with fellow Pokemon while using special powers excited me to no end >I could finally escape from my horrid social life, my overweight body, and family troubles! > Start using my imagination to conjure a method of both transforming into a Pokemon in the middle of the night, and magically warping to the Pokemon world of laidback adventures and indiscriminate friendship >I remember that I have 50+ Pokemon plushes >Before I went to bed every night, I took a plushie and furiously rubbed it over every single portion of my body for about an hour >Yes, even my mouth, groin, and ass crack >I do this while envisioning every body part I rub becoming that of the respective Pokemon >I begin with Mew because being a diety in the Pokemon world is better than being a pleb >After three nights, I realize it doesn't work with this plush >I move onto Mudkip, because i herd everybody lieks Mudkipz (my actual reasoning) >I did this with a Mega Mushroom plush because maybe the Mushroom Kingdom was part of the Pokemon world and Pokemon liked Italian plumbers >After about a week, I lose faith in my plan >But I still like rubbing Pokemon on my skin, because I feel that I metaphysically "bond" with the plushie, so that I can adopt its personality in real life and be charming > Plus intimacy feels like you are wanted by somebody >a week later, my teachers call my parents in worry about my sudden change in behavior >I.e. gnawing on other students' shirts, stomping in the middle of class, staring at random students with wide eyes and a large, creepy smile, and screaming during recess >They never figure out why I did it, think it's suppressed trauma or some s--- This isn't even the worst part. Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:53:15 No.26715903 >>26715911 >>26715932 >>26716262 >>26716306 File: marshstomp.png (577 KB, 568x456) >>26715893 > For Thanksgiving that same year, my family and I go to stay at my mother's friend's house in Kansas >They have two daughters who are each 2-4 years older than I am >My little brother brings about three plushies with him to play with >The drive is about 12 hours long, so we get there at midnight; I'm tired as hell >Whole host family is welcoming, daughters are nice, etc. >The day before, I rubbed myself with Umbreon, so I act edgy, unsocial and cold while also rubbing my mom's leg with my cheek next to the hosts >They are confused, but just assume its special snowflake behavior >We stay in one of the daughter's rooms, on an inflatable bed >During the night, despite being tired as hell, I wait for my brother to fall asleep for two hours > Once he does, I carefully remove a random Pokemon plush from his zipped backpack >Before I can tell which one it is because it is pitch black, I commence the standard rite of Pokemon initiation and heart swapping >Before five minutes, I pass out from exhaustion with the plush in my pants, close to my hip Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:54:16 No.26715911 ► >>26715932 >>26715944>>26715959 >>26716262 >>26716306 File: $_1.jpg (24 KB, 400x264) >>26715903 Last Part >Wake up in the morning, alone in the room, feeling an incredibly gluey sensation between my groin >I take off my pants, see a white, dried, and sparkly substance everywhere on the inside of my shorts > Realized I got a few drops on the plush as well (it turned out to be a Poliwhirl) >"This must be the stuff they talked about for the puberty videos they showed during my health class!" >I realize this is the real deal because all of the other "wet dreams" I've bragged about to my family and classmates was just me pissing on the bed >I'm so ecstatic that I forget to act like Poliwhirl, and run with my pants and plush into the dining room where everyone is already eating breakfast >I show everyone, including my family, the hosts, and their daughters, saying to each of them one by one "Now I'm a real man!" while drawing the outline of the massive c-- area >One of the daughters gag a little on their hash browns, the hosts stare with amused disbelief >My mother just gives me this face of resigned disappointment (I thought she was being sentimental over my transition into adulthood) >Little brother is p----- because I got his plush dirty and he wanted to show his plushies to them first >Host family just tries to congratulate me awkwardly, everyone else follows suit after their initial reactions WAT >I thank them all as if it was an awards gathering, telling my mother to never wash these pants or the plush again as a memento of my growth >As I leave for the other bedroom to show the other daughter, I hear my mom groan >I don't know why she didn't stop me >A couple of weeks later, my family forces me to go to a psychiatrist for unrelated reasons > Yep, it's Asperger's I stopped about a couple of months later. Nobody has mentioned it ever since. Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:57:58 No.26715932 ► File: 1418782142.jpg (13 KB, 336x280) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 H-------- anon Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)20:58:56 No.26715944 ► File: tsundereglaceon.png (666 KB, 1018x428) >>26715911 top tier cringe, I love the stories like this Anonymous 06/12/16 (Sun)21:36:50 No.26716262 ► File: 1462698180621.png (150 KB, 516x390) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 my god Anonymous 06/12/16 (Sun)21:39:29 No.26716306 ► >>26716629 File: HORY SHET.jpg (54 KB, 680x587) >>26715893 >>26715903 ARR >>26715911 someome cap this Anonymous 06/12/16 (Sun)22:01:01 No.26716540 ► File: 1379438548411.jpg (55 KB, 348x383) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 >Yes, even my mouth, groin, and ass crack >I act edgy, unsocial and cold while also rubbing my mom's leg with my cheek next to the hosts >I realize this is the real deal because all of the other "wet dreams" I've bragged about to my family and classmates was just me pissing on the bed >Now I'm a real man! >NOW I'M A REAL MAN Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)22:03:18 No.26716563 File: 1380773677679.png (88 KB, 282x219) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 I'VE SEEN SOME S--- Anonymous 06/12/16(Sun)22:11:51 No.26716654 ► File: 1465615539801s.jpg (5 KB, 125x125) >>26715893 >>26715903 >>26715911 This is the best thing I've read in weeks.

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