Anon activates his tard strength | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 103 KB JPG >ivehadenough.exe >"I'll show them!" >jump out of bed as high as I can and thrust my legs down to increase the impact on the floor 01/09/24(Tue)09:53:49 No.912088002 >hear two massive crashes from downstairs followed by child crying >be me >33 year old alcoholic >downstairs neighbors have 5 y/o little s--- >sounds like they have nightly furniture moving competitions and the screaming never ends >me suffering in bed with a hangover >almost s--- my pj's out of fear >several minutes later ambulance, police, fire truck, and landlord show up >pj's are shat >start throwing back shots of liquid cirrhosis because I have anxiety >knock at the door but pretend I'm not home >phone rings, luckily it's on silent >"anon, are you home?!" I hear through the door >lost in the sauce at this point and don't answer >find out next day a portion of their ceiling collapsed along with their kitchen cabinets : Anonymous >no one knows it was me >downstairs family finds new apartment because they don't feel safe here >peace at last BOOBA 1.06 MB PNG 01/09/24(Tue)09:56:43 No.912088133 >>912088002 (OP) # Put me in the screenshot, redditors

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon wears pants | /r/Greentext

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Anon has shower sex | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 38 KB JPG 08/17/18(Fri)02:45:42 No.47557562 2 Replies >Be me >Take shower >Water touches my whole body including c--- >Watercycle.jpg >Girl takes shower >Water touches vagina >Mfw I basically had shower sex Later virgins View Thread 08/17/18(Fri)03:07:53 No.47557792 : Anonymous >>47557562 (OP) # F--- OFF NORMIE GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT

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Anon goes to Japan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 141 KB PNG >go to japan >girl at a bar bought me a(n expensive) drink >asked to see my passport >took a pic of it >said she was going to the bathroom and never came back >see same girl at another bar >she pretended not to know me >tell her i recognize her tattoo >she suddenly doesn't speak english anymore >bartender tells me to leave

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Just incel things | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 45 KB JPG 05/17/22(Tue)13:14:03 >random girl is nice to you for 5 seconds No.168138175 >daydream a whole relationship with her for weeks What a loser r-right bros? N-never happened to me.

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On and on you are just like my favorite song | /r/Greentext

1h (1/9 1:10) 76047520 · 11 Re - 0 Img PNG 25KB (370x320) 1694007935846400.png 8 Replies >get gf >things going OK for some time >expenses creeping up because she needs to eat out every other day and buy new clothes every weekend, but apart from that, its fine >September 2023 >she NEEDS to see this band in another city >buy VERY expensive tickets + transportation, hotel, she even demanded to buy a expensive costume to attend the concert etc >fortunately arranged to pay the whole thing in 2 installments which made it more accessible >about to pay off the 2nd installment, feel relief >says another band is coming in a few months and NEEDS to see it >buy VERY expensive tickets + transportation (plane tickets) hotel >again manage to arrange to pay in a few installments to make it more affordable >yesterday >about to pay off the last installment, happy its over, can finally save some money >says another band is coming in a few months and NEEDS to see it holy F--- i thought women not knowing how to save money and being responsible for 90% of all spending was just a meme, but no, its real.

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Anon is depressed | /r/Greentext

122 KB JPG 03/26/22(Sat) 19:16:05 No.67947955 >Be extremely depressed >Make up delusions of grandeur and superiority >Start unironically believing said delusions >Stop being depressed and feel like a literal god for no reason at all It's this easy, you can change so much in a moment, reality is merely an illusion you can bend to your will and so is your personality. 8 Replies / 1 Image : Anonymous View Thread 03/26/22(Sat) 19:24:26 No.67 >>67947955 (OP) # you're legitimately describing manic depression

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Anon's foolproof retirement plans | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: HgMqmU2Q 218 KB JPG 01/08/24(Mon)16:52:52 No.19354674 "Where do you see yourself in 5 years." Plan A: >wageslave until 65 Plan B: >move to norway/sweden >catfish p--- into meeting up with me >kill them brutally >do this as many times as i can >eventually get cought >live comfortably in prison for the next 20 years >ill see from there

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A glitch in the matrix | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/09/24(Tue)01:33:41 No.76045997 >become homeless >no longer care about materialism >don't need a phone >don't need money >just get fed by charities and be free >no rent, no bills, free healthcare some days i think about packing it all in

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Santa has an opinion on infantry troops | /r/Greentext

Santa Claus Infantrymen be like 01/08/24(Mon)12:55:32 No.663136876 F--- Horses Horses Stink d.o. infantry 4 Lyfe X Unbenannt.png 39 KB PNG >Oooh yeah, I am Infantroooning >Cavalery? Horsefucker! HORSEFUCKER!!! >No, I don't have a foot fetish. >Yeah, fighting on foot makes me so hard. >Horses are only good for eating. >Why would you ride a retarded horse if you can just fight on foot? >Infantry for da epic win!!! >I am Infantroooooo0000000000000000000000 00000000000oooning!!! 00000000000000000000000000000000000

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Anon gets an interesting hookup | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 211 KB JPG 04/07/21 (Wed)01:43:13 No.851492990 > be me > going to bang chick i met on tinder > arrive at her house > she immediately leads me in to the bedroom > she pulls her pants down enough so that only her ass is visible > meh, a---'s fine too i guess > dont think any more about it, just bust into her ass > she suddenly tells me she has a surprise for me > she pulls at her head, taking off a mask > it's f------ joe rogan > he laughs and calls me a f----- before body slamming me to the ground, breaking my neck and instantly paralyzing me

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Anon wishes he was a landlord because of trans housemates | /r/Greentext

01/07/24(Sun)07:22:53 No.30517871 >trans housemates bedroom is really starting to reek >when the door is open I can see trash is piling up all over the floor >mold is growing on their windows, I have offered multiple times to show them how to clean it but they just keep saying they'll do it themselves >random items go missing: plates, measuring jugs, cook pots, extension cables, knives >the slightest setback results in them performing highly melodramatic full bodied racking sobs to be heard by the whole house >they tried to kill themselves late last year so what do I do without setting off this minefield Anonymous 85 KB JPG Anonymous >>30517871 (OP) # Threaten to evict, or move out yourself. If neither of these are doable, please explain why. >>30517886 # 01/07/24(Sun)07:23:38 No.30517875 Anonymous >>30517875 # I'm not the landlord I cant evict them >>30517895 # >>30518034 # 01/07/24(Sun)07:25:33 No.30517886

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Anon tries repressing and gets gayer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.86 MB PNG Anonymous 01/08/24(Mon)10:49:53 No.76044283 I will be alone forever. >try to repress my homosexuality by jerking off to big booba women 01/08/24(Mon)10:55:17 No.76044324 >going great >go to bed >dream I am having sex >huge fat guy >im topping >we both c-- at the same time like in my animes >covers my face and pillow in ungodly amount of >>76044392 # >>76044422 # coom >wake up checking pillow for coom >thankfully didn't c-- in my pants What does it all mean? : Anonymous Anonymous >>76044324 # i wish i were having your dreams, i am not sure dude maybe you are ironically a repressed heterosexual, think about it, have a big think 01/08/24 (Mon)11:03:39 No.76044392 01/08/24 (Mon)11:07:17 No.76044422 >>76044324 # The more you try to repress it the worse it gets anon.

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