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: Anonymous 1200px- A_pound_of_flesh_for_50p_(The_Melting_House)_(15617759019).jpg 350 KB JPG What if we grew houses out of flesh instead of building them? >natural warmth >hair for carpet >self repairing >temperature regulation >unlimited water 09/30/23(Sat)01:59:51 No.906866872 >built-in pillows and bed >natural security >always someone to talk to >self-cleaning (toilet anywhere) >no food waste (garbage disposal everywhere) >masturbatory aid >never feel lonely >pet antibodies You wouldn't even have to hang things up with nails and damage your walls. Just stick like a dildo into the butthole- like openings and hang stuff from those.

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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File: Screenshot 20241127-155712.png (228 KB, 742x721) Something Happened Anonymous (ID: HG6Lars) 11/27/24(Wed)17:35:15 No.489774321 ► >Polls all indicate a Harris victory, though close >Ann Selzer poll, known as a canary in a coal mine, indicated Harris winning lowa >Trump campaign suspiciously quiet nearing the end of the campaign >Harris campaign had significant energy >North Carolina predicted to be close >Virginia unusually red >The four countries willing and able to f--- with US democracy (Iran, China, Russia, NK) stand to benefit from a Trump win (cause it's destabilizing) >Billionaires cozy up to Trump despite a Harris victory being predicted >TRUMP WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 20 YEARS A REPUBLICAN CANDIDATE WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >WITH AN APPROVAL RATING EQUIVALENT TO CANCER Bros, I'm telling you, something funky happened

☐ Anonymous 11/25/24(Mon) 10:39:13 No. 17295889 >>17295909 >>17295925 >>17295935 >>17295976 >win independence >DON'T devolve into military dictatorship or absolute monarchy >start off with fresh land and an unusually high literacy rate >neighbors are retarded savages who live at the mercy of nature >large ocean between them and European chimpouts >shitgoesdown.jpg >"here tovarish buy my land I need to fund a chimpout" >ok > "here America buy my land, I need to fund my own le chimpout" >ok >"hey America there was a chimpout in Texas we'll join you (and won't secede later) if you help" >ok >*doubles land in two years* It's amazing how well they took advantage of what they had. Many nations have completely fumbled the bag during their development. What went so right?

Anonymous (ID: Lvuvmf4p 11/21/24(Thu)03:45:24 No.489109549 16 KB JPG >4chan known as a right-wing Nazi haven >allows all types of opinions and rhetoric >X known as a right-wing Nazi haven >allows all types of opinions and rhetoric >reddit known as a left-wing haven >bans anyone posting anything even slightly right of center >bluesky quickly becoming known as a left-wing haven >bans anyone posting anything even slightly right of center Really makes you think.

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Anon loves popcorn | /r/Greentext

amazon Anonymous No.703960114 20 minutes ago >be me >go on amazon to buy stainless steel popcorn machine (i love popcorn) >add my s--- to cart >see they have an upgrade to Amazon Prime called Amazon Prime X >claims to deliver your order i 10 minutes or less >think its b------- >free trial so i use it anyway >checkout >10 minutes go by >think "i knew it was too good to be true" >Knock knock, open up the door, it's real >With the non-stop, pop pop and stainless steel >mfw >X gonna give it to ya >F--- waitin' for you to get it on your own >X gonna deliver to ya 000 10 replies

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Anon helps the weird girl | /r/Greentext

>I've been on the Netherlands 5 months so far >my father got a job here so we had to move >still can't understand much >school feels like a waste of time because of that >but it's fun watching those sisters piss off the teacher >one of them is a loner weirdo >doesn't speak much >one day I passed by her in the corridor >a bunch of crap feel off her locker >felt like being friendly and decided to help her pick it up >she looks confused >I catch something weird >it's... a dildo with a tentacle pattern? >what the f--- >why was that inside her locker? >she starts panicking >I have no idea on what to do >her face is red like an apple >I drop it back into the locker >she runs away without saying a word >didn't see her again until the next week >we avoid eye contact after that

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Nothing bad whatsoever | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/09/23(Sat)17:11:53 No.192987747 Mery 2944861-hogwarts.jpg 100 KB JPG >school with teenagers with hormones out of control >Teaching students spells like >Obliviate >imperio >Wingardium Leviosa >Colloportus >Petrificus Totalus Yea I'm sure nothing bad happens

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anon has a new pet | /r/Greentext

Mouse.jpg (6 KB, 259x195) >he just stares up at awaiting death >i look into his eyes >hes crying >i feel so bad for him >i pick him up and take him to my room >he becomes my pet, i feed him and play with him >be beta virgin at the time (14) >parents thought i killed him months ago >hes a pretty clean mouse >one day i decide to take my mouse outside >i wear a jacket and put him inside >go on bus and sit next to 8/10 qt >mouse keeps making squeaky noises >girl starts looking at me >I play it off >mouse crawls out of jacket >girl isn't scared >she thought he was cute >starts playing with him >me and girl eventually start dating >mfw a mouse a reason i got a gf Anonymous 11/09/17(Thu) 17:08:30 No.750532045 ► >be me >be watching a movie with my family >mouse shows up out of f------ no where >mom is terrified and dad was sleeping >mom says >"ANON KILL IT!" >i sigh and get up to kill it >the f----- keeps running >i chase him for about an hour >until he just... gives up. >I've already injured him

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Anon finds a new friend | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 761573897 9 min. ago ... 4chan I blame you. >be me, 17 >just got license >home alone, want McD's >Drive in my Mom's minivan >4chan has been daily browsing for me at this point >drive through >"Yeah, uhm, can I get a 10 pc of some chicken tendies?" >whatthefuckdidljustsay.exe has been executed >this m----------- says "sure anon" >oneofus.jpg >drive to window, embarrassed af >guy is 20 something, says "you seem chill" and passes me note with his twitter >dm him >now best friends.

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Anon's professor malverses funds | /r/Greentext

File: 5754-pepe-hmm-1776306577.png (12 KB, 112x112) Anonymous 12/09/23(Sat)18:22:37 No.910597888 >be me >in calculus 2 class >professor, PHD, gets a fuckton (tm) of money to pursue research >the very next day and for the rest of the semester all printouts and class materials start getting printed in color and with cool graphs, examples, etc >absolute god tier notes but umm each sheet must cost half a dollar... we're about 20 in the class, and these are multi-page >there is no way this level of expenditure is sustainable for her... unless.. >surely this timing cannot be a coincidence right...?

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Anon harshly criticizes a Josh Giddey tweet | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: nLspF/4i) Post josh giddey @joshgiddey ....annoyed with seeing the constant bashing you all are giving Josh Giddey. Don't you losers have anything better to do than attack a man Not really into cartoons but I agree with this 100 who didn't do anything wrong? 12/09/23(Sat)18:54:35 No.19208169 Leave that man the f--- alone and let him play the sport he loves you sad pathetic cretins. CRACK Follow >be accused of predatory actions >defend yourself with cartoons What a f------ loser I'm just... 6D8B26D5-336A-4C03-B228-614D6C780126.jpg 284 KB JPG

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Anon got red-pilled by historical games | /r/Greentext

PUBLIC ORDER DETAILS Current Change per turn CONTRIBUTING FACTORS Difficulty level Buildings (Happiness) Characters 0 3 5 1 3 10 -6 Events Cultural differences Taxes Slaves Faction Public order is stable. How Creative Assembly gets away with this? Anonymous 12/09/23(Sat)23:37:17 No.1619589 >>1619590 >>1619 >play Total War Rome 2 >conquers a city -7 -3 0 >time pass >people still angry because taxes and cultural differences >CA is a company with progressive and tolerant values Why I get negative effects? I thought multiculturalism was our strength and taxes were necessary to build hospitals, schools and pay pensions.

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Anon finds Tinder easy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: yOnP4TAX) 12/04/23(Mon) 08:09:02 No.450821261 >>450810374 # literally within 30 minutes >match with girl on tinder >she swiped on me, so i know shes already thought about me f------ her >ask her if shes horny now >she says yes >ask for her address >she gives it >drive over there >she lets me in >i ask where her bedroom is >she takes me there >i start touching her p---- and we make out >pull my pants down while making out >guide her down so she squats and starts sucking my d--- >f----- her its that easy but you have to have a sense for who to ask "are you horny now? to, because a lot of girls will say "w--?" but there are a lot who are horny while theyre active on tinder and you dont even have to be good looking >>450822947 # >>450823876 # >>450824050 # >>450824178 # >>450826958 # >>450828035 #

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Anon lives for his imaginary girlfriend | /r/Greentext

♥ Why does self-improvement not work for me? Anonymous 12/09/23(Sat)11:19:10 No.30323923 >>30325259 >>30325271 >>30325386 >lift weights, run, climb >have a good body >trying to get a valuable degree (engineering) >work part-time >invest money >have positive networth (20K) >take care of my appearance with haircut, skin-care, grooming >wear normal clothes >trying to learn the piano >cook >read books >grow plants >already 24 years old and never had a girlfriend Does self-improvement just not work for me? Is it my genetics? I am 5'9" and ugly. Anonymous 12/09/23(Sat)11:21:53 No.30323939 ✓ >>30323923 (OP) because you do it for your imaginary future girlfriend, not for yourself.

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Unexpected Submission | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 86 KB JPG 12/09/23(Sat)02:41:08 No.910564606 >girlfriend is attacked by 2 men 2 week ago >she was not penetrated but they abused her >on the day I feel completely devastated and feel a burning sensation in my stomach >but now I masturbate imagining those two running their hands over her breasts and her body as she had told me W-- did I become a cuckold? I feel a little more about taking pleasure in the situation, but the pleasure is too great, has anyone gone through something similar?

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Libido Lamentations | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Stupid sex drive 1.36 MB JPG 12/09/23(Sat)09:08:51 No.75706210 Makes me miserable >be me >horny >think about chick I messed up with >fap >post nut clarity >don't give a flying f--- again >repeat I just want to be at post nut clarity 24/7, you tupid god. I feel at peace when I genuinely don't give as s---, but of course god can't have that. He wants to watch me squirm

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Greentext Stories - New SCP dropped | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 1200px- A_pound_of_flesh_for_50p_(The_Melting_House)_(15617759019).jpg 350 KB JPG What if we grew houses out of flesh instead of building them? >natural warmth >hair for carpet >self repairing >temperature regulation >unlimited water 09/30/23(Sat)01:59:51 No.906866872 >built-in pillows and bed >natural security >always someone to talk to >self-cleaning (toilet anywhere) >no food waste (garbage disposal everywhere) >masturbatory aid >never feel lonely >pet antibodies You wouldn't even have to hang things up with nails and damage your walls. Just stick like a dildo into the butthole- like openings and hang stuff from those.

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