Femboy anon is not ok bros | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

M Third post, saw a femboy in my dreams. >got laid off at work- not enough work to go around and newer hires get let go before tenured folk >promised $700 in severance pay that never got paid to me 48 KB JPG >no savings, been living paycheck to paycheck >landlord gave me a five days to come up with rent >hopped into doing DoorDash an Amazon flex- car breaks down after second day >utilities shut off on the third day >tomorrow is day five and I know I'm getting evicted, so I'll have to go live with my ultranationalist far-right conservative evangelical grandparents >bankruptcy is my only option at this point My only comfort is imagining him, lovingly holding me telling me I'm gonna be ok. I know I'm not gonna be ok. I'm losing my home. But when I imagine laying my head in his lap and having him stroke my hair, I feel safe again. The anxiety attacks fade away, the urge to cry and vomit and hyperventilate slowly leave me. I just think to myself that he isn't going to let any of that hurt me. This is all probably just symptoms of a much larger mental issue. A manifestation of loneliness or the part of me that wants to not be alone. It's all I have now though- no car, no power, and soon I won't even have a home.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon thinks king is keeping kingdom together | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 90 KB JPG 11/09/23(Thu)20:21:02 No.191916408 >has a reputation as a bad king >all 7 kingdoms fall into chaos as soon as he dies 13 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous >>191916408 (OP) # Kindom was already falling apart before he died because he was busy getting drunk instead of ruling and not paying attention to his ugly wife f------ her brother. 11/09/23(Thu)21:12:14 No.191918199

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Americanon and the balkans | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: W90Lf/eR what just happend? 2.64 MB JPG 11/08/23(Wed)13:17:28 No.448026627 >be me >see a turk and a greek argue about their belief >An american walks in >The turk and the greek start arguing about politics with the american >The american ignores them >The turk and the greek start arguing about food What? >They start arguing about religion >around 5 mintues later they start s--- talking about random cities huh? >They end the arguement by wishing to each other a good night. s--- was so surreal, how the f--- did them mfs go from arguing about food to arguing about religion? are the eastern europeans this confusing?

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Maybe we should weaponize our bears | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Why are Russian bears so weak? 1.05 MB JPG 11/09/23(Thu)09:12:41 No.189739231 American bears: >Large and intimidating >Herculean strength >Feeds on deer and bison >Impossible to domesticate >Free and majestic >Come in white brown and black Russian bears: >Small and meek >Weak enough for a human to beat it with fists >Feeds on shrubs and berries >Forced to dance and do tricks for slavs >Imprisoned zoo animal >Only comes in brown

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Autistic lunch | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Why am I so f------ autistic 11/07/23(Tue)10:09:09 No.75333122 5 KB PNG >on lunch break at work >In the cafeteria >My workplace has daily meals >Today they had one with a dessert chocolate cake >qt petite black girl standing behind me in line talking to her friend >She says "nah I don't like chocolate I don't want the dessert." >I turn to her and said "you don't like chocolate? But you are chocolate" >she says "What the f---?" And gives me a look of complete disgust >I awkwardly go and leave the line and didn't even eat God I hope I don't get fired for this

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Bosnian hacker | /r/Greentext

TER "hacking" into a classmate's Youtube channel Anonymous 11/09/23(Thu)14:01:15 No.909036040 [Reply] ► >be me, around 12 years old living in a Bosnian village >This guy in my class who almost everyone loves to pick on makes a youtube channel >Uploads a s----- skit that gets over 1k views less than a week and decent subs >Everyone at school is talking about it >Get jealous >plan.jpg >Still on semi-good terms with the guy, and he does not know english >go to his house to hang out and grab his phone while he is in the bathroom, memorize his e-mail >next day tell him that there is this epic screen recorder made by google which he can use to record games on his phone >Say I will send it to him >Go onto Youtube and type in his email in the login page, then click "Forgot password" >He gets the password reset message >He does not know english and thinks this is google sending him the screen recorder >he accepts >change his password >get full access to his Youtube >Don't do much with it, just happy my plan succeeded >One day I show him his account on my Youtube channel page >He gets scared and thinks I am a professional hacker >I then lose access to his channel, cannot remember exactly what it was, but I know he changed his password again >One day he comes over to my house, giving me his new password willingly >Said that I can just hack in whenever, and that he will give me money to "protect" his youtube from other hackers >accept >Start receiving 10 Euros from him monthly for the next year to "protect" his youtube >mfw I breached into a guy's youtube and he starts paying me protection money

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Anon talks about current affairs | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous CHICAGO EF 843 KB JPG 04/14/21 (Wed)09:52:11 No.852041675 >be 26 year vet >cant tell the difference between taser and gun? no wonder they want to defund you. : Anonymous >>852041675 (OP) # Imagine spending 26 years of your life in a profession and not being able to distinguish one tool from another. Oops the fireman accidentally used a foam extinguisher on the electrical fire 04/14/21 (Wed)10:00:36 No.852042139 >>852042480 # >>852047302 #

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Amy tells us a tale | /r/Greentext

File: 150507-news-amy-schumer.jpg (49 KB, 349x509) ola Anonymous 10/17/15(Sat)14:22:14 No.646917109 ► > be me, Amy Schumer > get a crush on some guy who wouldn't touch me with a ten-foot pole > one day he drunk dials me > I go to his house > he's so wasted he literally cannot make eye contact with me > I, fully sober, walk over to him and initiate sex > he is so drunk he can't even stay erect > he falls asleep on more than one occasion > I keep having sex with him > tell this story at a feminist gala > feminists praise me for literally r----- a guy > mfw the media doesn't even care > mfw I get to host Saturday Night Live > mfw I have the gall to condemn Bill Cosby for doing the same s--- I did

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Anon plays CoD Zombies | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/08/23(Wed)16:26:20 No.656877841 375 KB JPG >looking for a new COD Zombies game >ask Sledgehammer if their game is round based or DMZ >they don't understand >I pull out a diagram explaining what is round based and what is DMZ >they laugh and say "its a good COD Zombies game sir" >buy Modern Warfare 3 >it's DMZ

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Anon sums up a trial | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Vguf+9CB) 11/08/23(Wed)18:30:03 No.448071518 >>448072775 File: current mood.jpg (63 KB, 1067x800) >>448058315 >Trump: I want a loan. >Bank: What's your collateral? >Trump: This real estate, which is worth $X billion. >Bank: Okay, here's your loan. >[Later] >Trump: Here's your loan back, with interest. >Bank: Thank you. >[Much later] >Democrat NY AG: A CRIME HAS BEEN COMMITTED!!

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Anon is a lightweight | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/08/23(Wed)21:07:21 No.909023311 123 KB JPG >Go to company meeting >go to happy hour after >have 1 beer >am not drunk at all >never felt more comfortable and at ease with people >next day go out to eat with coworkers >At some point the topic of alcohol comes up >As a litmus test I tell them I am a lightweight and that I threw up after the happy hour >One of them nervously laughs "Yeh....uh....Josh told me last night he thought you were a little drunk" >Other guy immediately cuts it to fill the impending void, "I just thought you were smiling a lot, yeh but it's chill we were all having a good time" Mfw I'm so broken that the excuse of being completely wasted got people to hint to my face that I'm a f------ weirdo.

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Why would Mr Beast do this to Europe | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: D21vCORw Racists win again 60 KB JPG 11/09/23(Thu)20:16:52 No.448116900 >wells installed in Africa by white rich guy >they couldn't install wells on their own so they can't repair or maintain them >african population expands beyond previous bounds >wells inevitably break down >lack of water leads to mass deaths, overpopulation >flee to neighboring countries, Europe >Europe even more burdened until it can't support foreign aid anymore >Vicious feedback cycle where more starvation causes more migrant activity which causes more starvation >Europe falls to African hordes >African hordes can't sustain Europe any more than they could sustain wells >untold death, destruction, & migration which spends itself over the course of a century Thanks Mr beast

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bich ass uncle tom ass n * gga | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: WUNOIL4C C 129 KB PNG 03/15/22(Tue)11:42:44 No.367359910 >be me >be black >live in ghetto >notice blacks talk about whites like how internet white supremacists talk about jews >mention this at dinner >get beaten by older unemployed brother >decide to never speak out in house again and become introverted >focus on school so I can leave many years later half the country away >brother contacts me asking for gibs referring to me as a "bich ass uncle tom ass n----" >ignore him >turn on the news >black politicians talk about whites exactly how my family did >turn off news >drink cognac in a dark room alone it's never going to change, is it?

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