lazy rains | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

irina !!L4bkjjJgWmr 108 KB JPG 11/04/23(Sat)06:37:33 No.75293061 ENTJ >Lazy day and got wet from pouring rajn so dont cook >Eat a big slice of pizza, bag of chips and gulp down a monster and coke cans How do you f------ manage to SURVIVE on this GOD AWFUL DIET??? 286 KB JPG >Stomach hurts all day >I didnt even enjoy it that much One evening it took to knock me out and I just feel nasty and you fat f---- eat this daily Holy f--- I am never eating unhealthy again I swear 11/04/23(Sat)06:40:24 No.75293086 >>75293061 (OP) # I'm sorry you have such a s--- metabolism probably jewish 11/04/23 (Sat)06:42:09 No.75293100 : Anonymous >>75293061 (OP) # I treat my body like s--- in the hopes that I die sooner. Smoke 40 a day, inject Test E, Sustanon, Tren, drink 10 pints a night, nothing but greasy food and protein shakes. I cant wait to have a catastrophic heart attack and be f------ done with it all.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon is a gooner | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 57 KB JPG 11/04/23 (Sat)07:31:12 No.656304241 >finish videogame >immediately look up p--- of the hottest female characters

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each burger is beneath than a dollar each | /r/Greentext

nuggets.jpg 478 KB JPG What is your largest fast food order? : Anonymous 0 >>9005626 (OP) i was in the phillipines and ordered 30 yum burgers from jollibees because they were so cheap my action caused a huge scene because i was in a remote city that rarely sees white people, and the magnitude of burgers i ordered >>9006183 # >>9006205 # : Anonymous >>9006160 >Never see a white person in all 35 years of your life >Hear stories about how much they eat >Think that impossible, nobody could stomach that much! >One day, skinny white man arrives >Astounding! >What a novelty! >But surely the rumors must be false, see how thin he is >Follow him into local Jollibees to confirm >He orders 30 f------ burgers >3 f------ 0 >Go home to wife >Tell her we must sell everything >Need to open hotdog stand in America >We will be fabulously wealthy

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Anon describes the plot of Shield Hero | /r/Greentext

□ Anonymous 04/29/21 (Thu)13:34:58 No.221298210 >>221298377 >>221298550 >>221298616 >>221299358 >>221299429 >>22130087.1 >>221295671 >be slave trader v >person enters your tent, clearly an outlander >"where I am from we don't practice slavery, but though no fault of my own I must buy one" >sell him the beautiful and pure and demure and strong warrior princess you happen to have for a bargain price despite being a no name saleman >get the money, go buy more slaves >return to the city, outlander enters your caravan >"I have taught the people how to have 3 field crop rotation and how to cook their food, it has made me fabulosuly rich. My homeland does not condone of slavery, but I must buy some" >sell him a couple of beautiful, nubile, pure and exotic elven slaves you happen to have for cheap despite being a poor salesman >take the money to buy more slaves, funding a few slave catchers to help you >return, the outlander enters your shop >"my homeland does not condone of slavery, but I must buy some, I recently showed the local lord how to temper his swords, and he requests more" >sell him a dozen young pure nubile female dwarves (which in this setting are just loli elves) >leave, take the money to hire a mercenary company to capture more slaves >return, the outlander enters your upscale store >"my homeland does not condone of slavery, but I need more, as I have introduced foods from my homeland that are infinitely more delicious than anything in this world" >sell him a couple of beautiful pure noble oni that can work as cooks >take money, use it to fund a military expedition to capture slaves >return, outlander enters your palace >"the king was so impressed by me that he abdicated in favor of me, I am now the king, my homeland does not condone of slavery, but I must buy some...."

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Anon wants to fuck Alice. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >>3252178 (OP) # If Alice is my sister i will f--- her If Alice is my mother i will f--- her If Alice is my daughter i will f--- her If Alice is my cousin i will f--- her If Alice is not blood-related to me i will hesitate but i will f--- her >>3256518 # 11/01/23(Wed)17:59:24 No.3256412

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Anon has an adult woman fetish | /r/Greentext

[Return] File: 6d >> talog] [Bottom] [Update] [ Auto] 45d4ea1c061fe92fb().pg (133 KB, 1024x768) Hay 2948 9 7 08 10 11 12 10 14 18 93 17 15 10 ***NSS KERBE # EX >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish That's just called beign normal. Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:14:46 No.246720816 ► >>246720588 (OP) obviously >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:15:07 No.246720835246722721 HEH. Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:15:22 No.24672084624572 File: 1657112906298.jpg (73 KB, 789x867) ■ Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:10:32 No.246720588 ► >>246720698 >>245720816 >>246720835>>246720846246720866>>245720969 >>246721075>>246721105>>245721356 >>246721369 > >>248721876 >>246722468 >>246722505>>246722620 >>248722670 >>245722719 >>24672274>>246722877 >>246722880 >>246722939>>246723327 >>246723573 >>246723601 >>246723660 >>246723668 >> >>246723910 >>24672426946724421 >>246724608 >>246724648 >>246724935>>246724955>>246725108>>246725198>>246725300 >>246725477 >>246725931 >>246726205>>246726407246726733 >> >>248729937 >>246730370>>246730788 >>246731220 >>246731585>>246732397>>246736971 >>246737918 >>246739137 >>246739140 >>246739164>>246739253 >>246739469>>246740344>>246741027 >> >>246743286 >>246743983 >>246744108>>24671225>>246744341 >>246746411>>246747700 >>246749061 >>246753053246755591 >>2467554>>246756000 >>246756528 >>246757162 >>246757523 >> ■ Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)18:09:41 No.246723660 File: lol.gif (1.74 MB, 177x150) 22246/20568 (0) adult woman fetish >this is official art Did someone at Gainax have an adult woman fetish? >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish TICK Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:12:44 No.246720698246722721 Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)20:45:41 No.246730870 ► File: 1671936313574.jpg (174 KB, 1684x1560) ■ Anonymous 12/25/22(Sun)02:54:50 No.246744341 ► File: ClgKT3mWgAAbO1N.jpg (88 KB, 779x960) >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish Anonymous 12/25/22(Sui)09.57.36 No.246758528 Ide heb ing (28 KH, 477x) ■ Did I seriously read this? 12/24/22(Sat)18:52:45 No.246725581 >>246725681 File: 1671478680540100.png (610 KB, 921x920) >adult woman fetish >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish >>246720588 (OP) > adult woman fetish 10/10 bait Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)20:16:38 N >>246720588 (OP) the absolute state of /a/... Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)20:55:09 No.246730788 >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish? Most normal /a/ poster Anonymous 12/24/22 (Sat)17:23:48 No.246721356 ▶ File: kill yourself.jpg (46 KB, 533x670) BASED GOD. put me in the screencap FWA Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:17:00 No.246720969 ► File: 60D372DC-799F-4940-962C-2().jpg (90 KB, 680x669) KILL YOURSELF PLEASE AUTISM >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish Imagine being this much of a h---/p---, the occurrence of sex with adult woman subconsciously feels like the outlier. >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish 240120 CH Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)21 *adult woman tebsh File: Gunsmith cats Nikki surprise.jpg (88 KB, 572x403) 10 ARE YOU WELL? Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)21:03:12 No.246731220 File: 1634151642471.gif (342 KB, 256x256) DO YOU HAVE BRAIN DAMAGE? >>246723160 Everyone has their own tastes >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish THANK YOU... fortyBURN HEALS! ■ Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:24:59 No.246721424 ► >>245722 File: 1593634186730.jpg (209 KB, 580x580) THIS GUY IS A F------ IDIOT. 0 22248/20500 (SOL) >adult woman fetish? wow ■ Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:25:44 No.246721464 246722721 File: mzha.gif (1.32 MB, 640x450) >adult woman fetish don't put me in the screencap ■ Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)17:50:58 No.246722734 ► File: 1593692203231.png (818 KB, 1330x1080) ■ Anonymous 12/25/22(Sun)04:09:27 No.246746411 ► File: 69C7F2FD-C189-48A3 BODC-9(...).png (67 KB, 292x257) >>246720588 (OP) • >> Anonymous 12/25/22 (Sur)09.36.53 No. 248755501 File: 1330905362705.png (42 KD, 499x330) >>246720588 (OP) >adult won an fetish >>246722721 >Being this far gone There is no hope for you. >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish The proper term is hagphilia, please get it right next time anon. Anonymous 12/25/22(Sun)01:28:04 No.2467410 File: 1444230177454.jpg (4 KB, 190x190). ■ Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)22:33:29 No.246735244 Anonymous 12/25/22 (Sun)09:45:17 No.24675 File: Stare.jpg (27 KB, 680x622) File: 06ca9b9e0dbe8e00c38ced2b7(...).png (215 K >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish Anonymous 12/24/22 (Sat)20:03:35 No.246728659 >>246720588 (OP) Ah yes, scantily clad women of breedable age, the most improbable fetish of all ■ Anonymous 12/25/22(Sun)05:13:25 No.246747 File: 1643146807769.jpg (29 KB, 343x440) 3 >anime fans are so degenerate that they consider f------ adult women to be a "fetish" >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish Please put me in the • screencap ● ■ Anonymous 12/25/22 (Sun)00:31:05 No.246739137 ► File: 1668295967917289.png (30 KB, 157x101) >>246720588 (OP) >adult woman fetish .. Never change /a/ Never change ■ Anonymous 12/24/22(Sat)22:56:35 No.24673 File: Brol' Up.jpg (35 KB, 425x319) >adult woman fetish Anonymous 12/24/22 (Sat)18:13:41 No.246723 >>246720588 (OP) so this is why anno seethe at otakus Anonymous 12/25/22 (Sun)00:42:39 No.246739469>246739 >>246720588 (OP) >Adult women fetish Maybe human extinction isn't such a bad thing after all.

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Based and zombpilled | /r/Greentext

-PLAYSTATION HITS PLANTS ZOMBIES GW2 Anonymous 11/03/23(Fri)22:12:39 No.75288728 [Reply] ► >>75289702 >find out about pvz in 2009 >5 years later, a TF2 like shooter of it releases, called pvz garden warfare, becoming one of the greatest games of 2014 >2 years after it releases, GW2 comes out, becoming simultaneously the best pvz game and best EA published game ever made >spend over 1400+ hours on the game >got all the achievements >got all the variants >did all the campaign >got to rank 5455 (the max rank) >after 7 years, the game is still fun to play Take The Zombpill, Lads. + 5 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view. >> Anonymous 11/03/23(Fri)23:50:29 No.75289682 ▶ >> Anonymous 11/03/23(Fri)23:52:14 No.75289702 ►

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Anon is Tom Scott | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/12/21(Wed)22:36:01 No.150834443 >>150835223 >>150835311 >>150835537 File: 1616537670738.png (335 KB, 640x480) LO Sneed's Feed&Seed Formerly Chuck's I'm here at Sneeds Feed & Seed, a small shop in rural Springfield. But it wasn't always called this.

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Anon has a dent in his chest | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 16 KB JPG 02/15/21 (Mon)19:14:44 No.847479070 Friend said I should share this here >be me, 13 >born with this deformity called funnel chest, have a ~1 inch dent in my ribcage, pic related >spending a week in some christian summer camp >go swimming one day >take shirt off, people immediately notice >dumbfucks are absolutely fascinated by the deformity >that evening one of my roommates comes into our room >tells me to pull my shirt up and lay on the floor >am confused but do it >m----------- takes out a bottle and pours water into the dent >dent acts as a bowl, most of the water stays in it >slurp the water out of the cavity with a straw

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Leafanon has it rough | /r/Greentext

How do single men stay sane in this country How do single men stay sane in(...) 42 KB JPG 11/02/23(Thu)12:08:08 No.56535017 >forced to move out of current place >make 35/hr >cheapest 0 bedroom apartment in my city is 1600 >private rooms in shared houses going for minimum 1200 >no friends or family to live with >cheapest s--- box cars going for 5000 so don't drive >commute to work is 1.5 hours >$17 for 2 uncooked chicken breasts >don't eat out, don't go out, drink a 6 pack per week >only able to save $500 per month >immigrants making half what I make still pouring in by the millions >city went from 15% minority to 40% in my lifetime >whenever someone my age has things find out they got handouts from parents, car, computer, clothes, vacations, homes, all parents >boomers at work keep asking me why I look sad

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Anon need 4chan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Hotring but a disappointmery Oblak fta stutters Freak agte 114 KB JPG 11/03/23(Fri)00:22:50 No.11142957 4chan is the only thing that genuinely makes me laugh. no other normie s------, people or websites for that matter, ever comes close to such edgy levels of absurd comedy. i'm entirely convinced i am incapable of making a deep, heartfelt connection with another human being who doesn't have chan sensibilities. >why don't you quit? how could i live without it? how would i live without you guys? give me a reason, any at this point, sound enough to make me forfeit such endless fun every day and move on from it.

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Anon is not a sex offender, yet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 70 KB JPG 11/03/23(Fri)20:38:42 No.189499426 >tfw turning 30 and still a virgin It feels so bad, bros. I decided that I will just walk up to random women outside that look slutty and just ask them if they want to have sex with me. If they say no, I will offer to pay them. I know this sounds desperate but at this point I have no choice. Will this work? I wouldn't just say "have sex with me". It would be more like: >Hey I saw you here and I think you're a really beautiful woman. Y'know, I'm kind of a virgin and I thought losing my virginity to you would be a dream come true! Don't worry, I have no STDs of course and I can bring you to my home, to your home or rent a room. If she says some b------- excuse like >Thank you! You sound sweet but I'm actually busy right now.. That's the time I would offer her money. >Ah a shame! But if I gave you 50... no 100 Euro, maybe you could spare some time for me...?

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Anon found treasure | /r/Greentext

☐ Anonymous (ID: U4fE0Gui) 11/02/23(Thu)23:03:10 No.447328865 >>447329108 >>447329310 >>447329421 >>447329707 >>447330373 >>447330722 >>447332836 >>447334745 >>447334902 >>447339701 >>447339856 File: 9052.jpg (80 KB, 450x600) >>447312370 (OP) I know most people are posting b------- in these threads but I'll post something legit for a change >Worked construction in the 90s >Company I was working for was hired to build an underground parking lot under Acropolis >Under Acropolis there are multiple tunnels and small rooms that have been there since Ancient times and were used extensively during WW2 to hide children and women >As we keep progressing we find an unmapped path >we follow it for like 10 minutes >No idea where exactly we are in relation to above ground now but we weren't that far from Parthenon itself according to the maps >find an opening in one of the paths and go through >find new path >we walk about 5 or 6 minutes >Find huge room >full of Ancient Greek statues in pristine condition, completely undamaged >Room is connected to another path >follow path further in >There is an entrance to something but is sealed and the way it's sealed is sloppy with tons of rocks of various sizes >We leave it untouched >We report this >Archeologists arrive >Head archeologist says the craftmanship greatly resembles Phidias' and that this is one the biggest archeological finds ever >Construction stops for a while >We restart about 3 weeks later >Path has been completely blocked off and made to look like a normal brick wall >Construction of underground parking lot is canceled 1 week later >Never heard of the statues again, nothing was ever announced to the public, nobody even knows we found a path and a room full of goddamn national treasures To this day I still wonder what the scum ruling this country did with those statues. We're talking over 50 of them at the very least, of various sizes and all of them in immaculate condition.

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