Anon goes for a job interview | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 61 KB JPG 08/16/21(Mon)13:26:45 No.861172531 >go in for job interview >Only m----------- in there with ironed business casual clothes >Everyone else showed up to the interview in just a T-shirt and some jeans >I'm the only person that brought a copy of my resume and college schedule in a binder. I don't think I'm gonna get this job anons.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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OP's Mom's gotta solution | /r/Greentext

File: Tomb_of_the_Chariots,_mal(...).png (1008 KB, 1200x577) 09/10/23(Sun) 06:48:27 No.905848202 >>905848249 >>905848261 >>905848295 >>905848323 >>905849234 >>905851973 >>905854809 >>905855134 >>905855229 >>905858006 >>905858687 >>905860447 >>905861405 >>905861830 >>905862903 Anonymous >gay man who dates men here >always feel a sense of guilt and wrongness during sex >confide all of this in my mom who knows me better than anyone >she offers to let me have sex with her to try to correct me >this offer both intensely arouses me and feels incredibly perverted >dont tell her this, still considering her offer Could it work? Anonymous 09/10/23(Sun)06:49:46 No.905848249 >>905848300 >>905851821 >>905848202 (OP) # Are you a bugger or a sodomite ? Anonymous 09/10/23(Sun)06:50:02 No.905848261 >>905848202 (OP) # Post pics of your mom

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Anons Florida vacation | /r/Greentext

Autism thread; I'll start >Be me >17 year old autist >On vacation with family in Florida >Stop by BBQ place for dinner >Order glass of water because it's hot as hell >Eat the ice once I'm done, because I don't want to be wasteful 95 KB JPG >qt3.14 waitress notices and offers me another drink >I say no >She offers a cup of ice >The f---? >Panic and say yes >Ice arrives >I know the waitress will notice if I don't eat it >Reluctantly eat the entire glass of ice Why am I like this?

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what the sleeper agent | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 664 KB JPG 09/10/23(Sun)18:58:08 No.74692206 i wish i could just sleep all day i wish i could sleep forever and never wake up just put me in a coma or maybe even put me down life is too much to bear awake : Anonymous >>74692206 (OP) # schoo mimi mi mi 09/10/23(Sun)21:09:36 No.74693602

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Anon is a Chad look-alike........ | /r/Greentext

>be me >chad look-alike >basically just have good looks and give good first impression, but still feel like 4chan is my people >get sick of people treating my autist friends like s--- PIMENTA 1002 KB PNG >start telling stacies who s--- on autists that they have to f--- my friends before they can f--- me >mostly get called a freak but it's still fun for the s---- and giggles >mfw one of the girls actually says ok and actually does it >end up being too disgusted with her to have sex with her >she keeps having sex with friends anyway >mfw am chad robin hood

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Anons loose hope | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.68 MB PNG : Anonymous 495 KB GIF : Anonymous 09/10/23(Sun)13:52:23 No.74692781 : Anonymous : Anonymous : Anonymous : Anonymous >Harry Potter tv series in the works Theyre gonna make Hermione black, arent they? 09/10/23(Sun)13:54:40 No.74692800 >Theyre gonna make Hermione black, arent they? F------ Rope fuel. Its so over bros. Why live? 09/10/23(Sun)13:56:49 No.74692827 >>74692855 # >>74692862 # >>74692863 # 09/10/23(Sun)13:58:56 No.74692855 09/10/23(Sun)13:59:36 No.74692862 09/10/23(Sun)13:59:36 No.74692863 09/10/23(Sun)14:03:03 No.74692905

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Anon finds porn | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 211 KB PNG 01/05/22(Wed)13:53:11 No.66858191 >boyfriend writes script for a p--- video starts off with guy saying "OH YEAAAAAAAAH IT'S FAPPING TIME!" https://www.x------.com/video6442304 View Thread

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Anon Feels Old | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 144 KB JPG So like can I date 21 year olds, or is that too young too? I sure as hell not dating some beat mid 20s w----. : Anonymous 08/06/23(Sun)04:37:04 No.74285470 >turned 27 a few hours ago >still a virgin >too old to date 18 year olds >women my age are either ugly, used up, or single mothers >too old to be happy 08/06/23(Sun)04:39:01 No.74285483 women look fine at 27 what the f--- are you talking about : Anonymous >>74285470 (OP) # Date an 18 year old. >>74285584 # 08/06/23(Sun)04:43:24 No.74285505 My parents have an age gap of 10 years they've been happily married all there lives my moms 58 and my dads 68. This stuff about men being considered sexual deviants for liking women younger than they are is completely artificial. Young women are hot. If shes legal shes legal. People who seethe about it want to control your behavior and make you miserable. Stop listening to assholes who want to stop you from dating women you find attractive.

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Young anon has 0 rizz | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 64 KB JPG 09/10/23(Sun)03:55:16 No.905839096 >be me, 2014 >14/15 freshman in high school >virgin af, was basically addicted to anime and hentai >very low self esteem, like rock bottom. P sure I had undiagnosed autism, I'm way less of a sperg now but anyway >pretty attractive girl starts talking to me in English class >I just think she's being friendly, turns out she's interested in me. Her friend tells me she wants to hook up >I get the girl's number, start talking to her. She tells me she will send me nudes if I want. I say sure I'll lyk >I start sending her doge memes like all the time because I'm a f------ retard >this expectedly causes her to lose interest in me >weeks later I ask her if she can still send the nudes. She said nah >months later I catch a rumor from a friend that I apparently pestered her for nudes >mfw

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anon wants purebred aryan children | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 59ZPwuAo My current girlfriend is Asian(...) A 35 KB JPG 12/01/22(Thu)14:56:11 No.406636314 be me white, tall, muscular, Germanic I have had 20-30 girlfriends (stopped counting) my ultimate and my best girlfriend ever is not white > She is tiny and from South-Korea. > She is by far the most faithful girlfriend ever > I would trust her with my life. > She is very smart and funny. > She studied German language and literature at collage > But I need Germanic sons... (She can't deliver) What do, /pol/? This is the best gf I was gonna get, ever. Should I leave her just because of skin color?

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Anon didn’t want to take care of someone | /r/Greentext

Anonymous PLEASE C PATIENT IHAVE AUTISK 07/22/22 (Fri)12:22:08 No.882504554 142 KB PNG >Be me >2 Days ago, mom calls me >Sup? >You're going to meet CJ, remember how your cousin's husband has a sister, who has a disabled kid since she's a crack fiend? That's him, and you're going to meet him and take care of him every once and a while. >No. Not doing it. >Yesyouare >No, I'm f------ not. >You're such an a------, you're a terrible person. So, am I the a------ in this situation? I have never met CJ, OR his mom. His mom did not specifically ask for me. I was straight up volunteered without my knowledge.

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Anon isn't sure whether she has a crush on him or just mixed signals | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous cashier flirting with me!!!!!!(...) Comegle Talk to stra d negle 1.1 MB WEBM 09/10/23(Sun)09:33:05 No.74685654 >work as bagboy at grocery store >bag for this cute cashier girl >asks me when I got to work >asks me when I get off >says she has the next 3 days off is she just being nice or was she trying to get me to ask her out?

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Anon becomes Spider Man | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 156 KB PNG 07/13/18(Fri)20:50:31 No.46783661 had a dream about being spider-man >in dream, realize i have all the powers of spider-man >im under some bridge in a alley way >first thing i try is to climb walls >f--- yeah i climb all the walls >shoot my webs at buildings, kind of hard to aim >normies walking by, shoot webs at them >kek.jpg >people look at me in awe >feels great man >jump on top of a building, holy f--- i jump high >look over the edge >about to web swing >jump off and shoot web >wake up F--- >try shooting webs just in case >didn't work why live

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